“So, what do you think we should do, Octavia?” Vinyl asked her wife.
Octavia looked up into the sky, viewing how heavy the snowfall was. Silently, she then walked across the plateau to its edge, and looked down the descending slope. Vinyl patiently waited as Octavia walked back across the plateau to her. “Well?” she asked.
“I’ve got an idea of how we should get to the research facility, and from there I think we should scope it out before making our next move,” Octavia suggested. “But before we do that, there is something we need to address.”
Vinyl nodded in approval. “Absolutely; I wanted to see what the facility was like before we end up inevitably bursting through the front door,” she said. “But what do we need to address?”
Octavia took a deep breath. “So, give it to me straight,” she began. “Am I too optimistic?”
“Huh?”
“You didn’t get the opportunity to answer me previously as your father was talking. So, do you think he’s right? Am I too optimistic?” Octavia repeated.
Vinyl put a hoof to her mouth as she thought about it. Then she grinned. “Well, you thought you could live with me back when we barely knew each other, so yeah, I’d say you’re a bit too optimistic,” she laughed.
“Dammit!” exclaimed Octavia, which was not the reaction Vinyl had expected. She stopped her laughing immediately. “You’re supposed to be the silly optimistic one who gets by on good looks and good luck, and I’m supposed to be the gritty, troubled individual who doesn’t follow the rules, but by Celestia do I get results.”
“Uh…okay?” Vinyl said, confused. “Where did this all come from?”
Octavia shrugged. “I got bored on the flight over and started thinking about what our backgrounds would be like were we actually spies.”
“And you cast me as the optimistic one?” Vinyl asked, acting shocked. “As if! Though I’ll admit that you got the good looks part right, my dad died, and then came back to life and turned out to have been lying to me about his death all along! I’m clearly the gritty one!”
“Speaking of, if your father faked his death, what lead you to thinking that he had died in the first place?” asked Octavia. “As his next of kin, surely you would have gotten the chance to see his body or make the funeral arrangements, yes?”
Vinyl shook her head. “Nah, nothing like that. After coming back from the Amarezon, I found a note at home.”
“A letter explaining he had passed away whilst you were gone?” Octavia asked. Even though the two of them knew now that Spyglass had never died, her voice was somewhat softer; the memory of finding out her father had died might still be tender for Vinyl.
“Kinda?” Vinyl said. “The note said – I dunno – something along the lines of, ‘’Sup, Vinyl, I’m dead, don’t worry about it’?”
Octavia was silent for a few moments. “…That was it?” she asked, finding it hard to believe.
Vinyl nodded solemnly. “You can see why I didn’t really want to talk about it,” she said.
“Unbelievable,” said Octavia, rolling her eyes. “Anyway, how about we start our actual mission, and we can work out what type of spies we are by actually being spies?”
“Sounds like a plan!” said Vinyl. “And if I turn out to be the spy that’s working for the evil organisation, don’t blame me!”
Octavia gave Vinyl a look. “What makes you say that?”
“So, what do you think this cardboard box is for?” Vinyl asked, pointing to the package her father had left the two.
“I’ve been thinking about that, and I believe it’s a tool designed to assist us in infiltrating the research facility,” said Octavia, slowly walking around the box as she examined it. “This box is perhaps the perfect tool for it – it’s spacious enough to fit the two of us inside it, yet it is still not enough to draw attention from the guards. We can move around whilst inside it, becoming an invisible force beneath the guards’ noses. Why, we can even place the box on a conveyer belt, or something similar, within the facility, and be transported to different sections without having to worry about locked doors, or getting past guards! Yes, this cardboard box truly is –”
“It’s got stuff in it,” interrupted Vinyl, giving the box a small kick and hearing something shake around inside it.
“Oh,” said Octavia, her enthusiasm deflating slightly. “Well, still, I am sure that whatever is inside this magnificent box will still prove to be somewhat useful. Open it up and let’s see what it is.”
Vinyl’s horn glowed, and she used her innate unicorn magic to open up the top of the box before flipping it upside down. What fell out of the box elicited a gasp from Octavia.
“Two boxes!” she exclaimed excitedly. “This means we can split up! Oh, this is absolutely perfect!” Octavia pranced over to Vinyl and gave her a big hug, followed by a kiss on the cheek. “Which one do you want, beautiful? Isn’t this exciting?! We each get our own box!”
“I’m not even going there,” muttered Vinyl. Without saying another thing, she levitated one of the boxes into the air and flipped it upside down, as she had with the larger box. Something fell out of this box.
“…What the hay is this?” Octavia asked, walking over to the…thing… and hesitantly lifting it into the air. “Why was this ruining the box?”
“It’s a skateboard, Octavia,” explained Vinyl, opening up the other box to find a duplicate skateboard within. “Dad said our transport to the research facility was inside the box, remember?”
“We’re going to…skating board to the facility?” Octavia asked hesitantly. She awkwardly placed a hoof on the skateboard, testing its weight, only to have it sink into the snow. “I’m not so sure,” she said. “I think the boxes are still a better idea.” Returning to the largest box, Octavia lightly pressed its top with her hooves.
“What, we’ll just slide all the way to the building?” Vinyl asked, sceptical. She’d used her telekinesis to clear away some snow and on the rocky surface that was revealed, the skateboard rolled quite well.
“I’d rather trust this box than those death tra-oof!” Octavia had attempted to put her entire weight on the top of the box, broken the cardboard, and fallen through, landing flat on her face. “Okay,” a resigned sigh came from the pair of legs sticking out of the box, “I suppose I can give these ‘skating boards’ a go.”
“Sounds good to me!” Vinyl exclaimed happily. She stood atop her skateboard and gave a small kick against the ground. Her locomotion was shaky, but she seemed to be able to balance herself well enough. “I’ve never tried skating before, but it seems like the sort of cool and hip transportation method that should both get us to the base and make us look extreme as hay at the same time.”
Throwing the box off her, Octavia walked over to her skateboard and hesitantly placed a hoof upon it, sinking it further into the snow. “You are absolutely certain that this is the best way to get down to the building?” she asked hesitantly.
“Hay, I’m sure that dad put them in the boxes for a reason,” said Vinyl.
===============================
Did I remember to take whatever was inside those boxes out of them before giving them to Vinyl and Octavia? wondered Spyglass, currently being flown back to Equestria. I think I did, didn’t I? Oh well; I doubt that they won’t realise the boxes are to be used as a disguise within the building. My daughter may be a bit ditzy at times, but I’m sure that she’s not so stupid that she’d actually use whatever’s in the boxes.
===============================
“Fair enough,” said Octavia. “Let us get this started then.” Picking up her skateboard, she and Vinyl headed back to the plateau’s edge. They left behind the boxes, as they had nothing to do with them and didn’t think that they would. Unbeknownst to Vinyl and Octavia, the boxes would eventually become the home of a snake in several weeks when the weather got warmer and it came out of hibernation.
Looking down the slope, the snow was a lot scarcer. Whilst there were some patches here and there, enough rock was exposed that Vinyl and Octavia could confidently skate down the slope with little risk of hitting a snow bank and crashing into a tree, or more rock. It had definitely been the right move for Spyglass to give them the skateboards for the mission; something which had certainly been planned.
Octavia looked down the receding slope, unsure what to do. The idea of jumping on a thin plank and some small wheels and trusting it to guide her to safety felt…dubious, especially when she hadn’t so much as practiced it before. And what then, at the bottom of this steep and dangerous path, once she had guided herself past all of the obstacles and made it with all of her limbs intact? Time to infiltrate the research facility, just like that? Time to save Equestria from a threat which may or may not be real? Octavia turned to Vinyl.
“Um…you ready?” she asked.
Vinyl grinned at Octavia, a lovely smile which showed off most of her teeth. Octavia never got sick of seeing that smile, whether it was from one of the unicorn’s own terrible jokes or from whatever ridiculous situation the companions were in at the time. “Of course I am; I’m Vinyl Scratch!” said Vinyl. Without any hesitation, she kicked off, fell to the slope, and then immediately began skating down it at high speed, shouting out “Xtreeeeeeeeeemmmmeeeeeee!!!” as she did so.
Biting her tongue to prevent herself from making a snarky comment in Vinyl’s wake, Octavia reluctantly climbed atop her skateboard, adjusted her balance a few times, and then, after a brief moment of hesitation, kicked off, beginning her descent down the slope.
It was like nothing Octavia had ever experienced. Picking up high speed almost immediately, Octavia’s brain released a minute amount of adrenaline in response, sending a euphoric rush throughout her head. The wind forced back Octavia’s carefully groomed mane and tail, chaotically waving them behind her. Octavia found herself controlling the board almost on instinct, turning left and right as necessary to avoid a tree or large rock in her path.
The slope only got more treacherous as Octavia accelerated down it, with brambles and patches of snow appearing in her path every few metres. It was a miracle that she had the agility to dodge them all without ever needing to slow down or brake. Was she refusing to do so due to her lack of control over the skateboard, or was it the sheer, raw thrill of the speed she had achieved that made her not even attempt to decelerate? Octavia soon found herself attempting manoeuvres not out of necessity, but for their own sake – a flip over a rock here, or a quick grind down a fallen branch there.
Part of Octavia’s mind was paying attention to the board and controlling it, easing it into her chosen path, but the rest of her was focusing on the rush of energy she felt from the activity. Octavia had never felt anything like this before: not when playing the cello, not when fighting an assortment of lowlifes and scumbags – hay, not even when kissing Vinyl did she feel as excited and fulfilled as she did at this moment. Octavia had surprised herself – skateboarding was fun.
And yet, as enjoyable as the skateboard ride was, it eventually had to come to an end. The slope eventually flattened out and became snow-covered once more. It was into this snow that Octavia skidded, slowing her skateboard down expertly and leaping from it. She landed directly in front of Vinyl, who had somehow gained a backwards baseball cap on the trip down.
It had been wild. It had been extreme. It had been the most exciting thing Octavia had ever done, and all she wanted to do right now was to climb back up to the top of the slope and do it all again.
“That was fun,” said Octavia to Vinyl.
“I concur,” replied the unicorn.
The two ponies walked off in the direction of the research facility they had each individually spotted during the descent, no words being said between them.
===============================
“Got any ideas, Octavia?” Vinyl asked her partner quietly. The two mares were lying in the snow as flatly as they could, viewing Baron von Darkhoof’s research facility from a distance. Walking there after the skateboard ride had been easy; it was only a few minutes away from where the two of them had arrived. Getting in, on the other hoof?
“Correct me if I’m wrong, Vinyl, but I spot five guards outside,” Octavia said. Thankfully, the darkness helped her coat blend in quite well with her surroundings; any guard who saw her would likely think her to simply be an oddly pony-shaped tree branch. “The one on the balcony checks the position of the four on the ground every few seconds, so he would naturally grow suspicious should one of them disappear due to our interference.
“The front entrance doesn’t appear to have anything special about it to the naked eye, but judging by the brief pause before it automatically opened earlier, I would suspect that some sort of magical field reads the aura of those who approach it and only opens it for those who are allowed into the facility. If one of us approached it? At best the door simply wouldn’t open; at worst an alarm would be raised.”
Vinyl nodded in confirmation. “I’d love to say that I can try to reenchant the field to add us to the ponies allowed inside, but that’s a bit out of my expertise.”
“Perfectly acceptable, Vinyl,” said Octavia. “Now, each of the guards looks to be equipped with a crossbow. It would be nice to assume they are the same type of crossbows that we were given back when we were in COBRA and that they are worse than useless for the guards, but unless we get absolute confirmation of it, I would rather not test that theory. I believe it is accurate to say that those crossbows fire bolts.
“In addition to the crossbows, the guards have other tricks up their sleeves,” continued Octavia, still speaking quietly. “I recognise some of those cutie marks – see that one there? His cutie mark is the Equestrian-wide symbol used to represent black belt level skill in judo. That one over there? That symbol he has for a cutie mark is often associated with the martial art style of capoeira.” Octavia frowned. “Or it could be a bowl of soup. It’s difficult to see at this distance.
“Finally, you see the pony on the balcony’s cutie mark?”
Vinyl squinted, wishing that her glasses had a zoom function. “Is…is that a picture of a pony kicking another pony’s teeth out?” she asked.
Octavia nodded. “Kickboxing. I’m not sure what the others’ cutie marks represent, but judging by the ponies we’ve seen so far they’re probably all related to martial arts.”
“Even the one with a rubber duck for a cutie mark?” Vinyl asked.
“Especially the one with a rubber duck for a cutie mark. I know that you and I have some street smarts and some experience from over the years, but these ponies are in a whole other league compared to us.”
“Yeah,” agreed Vinyl, “the League of Officially Regulated and Sponsored Martial Arts.” Octavia raised an eyebrow quizzically. “It’s a real thing! Look it up!” Vinyl explained with a grin.
Octavia chuckled slightly before continuing. “So, as to whether I have any ideas: you see those crates placed here and there?”
Vinyl nodded. “Yeah, I’m guessing they probably contain items or parts for whatever the hay Darkhoof’s planning. What are you thinking?”
“Do you see how they are slightly larger than either you or I? Now, all this time whilst I have been observing the guards, I have noticed patterns in their patrols around the crates,” Octavia explained. “It appears randomised, but by counting the number of steps each of them take between turning, I have realised that the number of steps correlates to a base-nine encrypted hash key of the Fiboneighcci sequence.”
“…Brilliant,” whispered Vinyl under her breath, observing one guard and doing some calculations in her head simultaneously. “It seems so obvious when you mention it, but if you hadn’t told me…”
“Exactly,” said Octavia. “Now, we have two options. The first is that with our knowledge of the guards’ patrol patterns combined with the cover afforded by the crates, we ambush the guards at certain positions in their patrols, exploiting blind spots and taking them out silently before the others notice anything is amiss. Between the guards’ weapons and personal training, I have no doubt that this will be difficult, with the probability of it going off perfectly being incredibly low. We will need to be undetected the entire time, perhaps even killing our foes should it be necessary to maintain stealth and speed. Even should we succeed, we will still need to find a way in through the front entrance once we have eliminated the guards.”
Vinyl bit her lip. “Sounds risky…but if there’s anypony who can pull it off, it’s us two,” she said, growing excited towards the end of her sentence. “And option two?”
Octavia pointed a hoof. “We enter the base through those air ducts there. Nopony is guarding them.”
Vinyl’s gaze followed Octavia’s hoof. Sure enough, there was a large vent cover in the side of the building which had no visible guards around it, nor looking in its general direction. What’s more, as it was off to the side, Vinyl and Octavia could probably make their way to it without needing to get too close to any of the patrolling guards.
“Oh,” said Vinyl. “Uh, I guess we go for option two?”
Octavia’s mouth twisted for a moment as she thought about it. “…Yes, I think that the safer option does sound like a good idea,” she declared. “Just what I’d expect of a silly, optimistic spy,” Octavia added under her breath.
“What was that?” Vinyl asked.
“Shall we get going?” Octavia suggested. “Even if we give the guards a wide berth, we’ll still have to move slowly so that none of them detect us.”
Vinyl agreed with Octavia, and pressed her body even further into the ground. She was lying stomach-first on the snow with her front and hind legs spread. With minute movements of her front hooves, she slowly pulled herself forwards a small distance. Octavia followed suit, and the two ponies gradually inched their way around the field in front of the research facility and to their destination. If any of the guards were to look, they would see a slightly off-white patch of snow and a pony-shaped branch, quietly making their way around.
As a matter of fact, the guard standing on the balcony of the research facility did see the two ponies almost immediately, and wasn’t fooled by their natural camouflage at all. However, a common hazing ritual amongst the guards in the research facility was to tell new recruits that they needed to crawl around in the snow for several hours in order to grow accustomed to the cold, so it didn’t matter in the end anyway.
Finally, after what felt to Vinyl like an infinite amount of time (but which was actually closer to ten minutes), she and Octavia reached the air vent. “Alright!” she declared happily, getting up. Her coat was cold and wet by now, and she wanted to get inside the facility where she could hopefully warm up. “Now, how do we get in?”
“I don’t suppose your father gave you some sort of spy tool kit whilst I wasn’t looking, did he?” Octavia asked.
“That would have made a lot of sense, huh?” Vinyl asked. “Still,” she said, raising a hoof to feel the edge of the vent cover, “let’s see what we can – hey!” As she was touching the vent cover, it shifted suddenly, and fell forwards. Both ponies winced, but luckily it made no sound as it landed in the snow.
“That was…” began Octavia.
“Convenient?” suggested Vinyl.
“Very,” agreed Octavia. She examined the edges of the vent, before briefly checking the vent cover. “It looks like the screws have been cut through. What if – what if someone did this to help let us in?” she asked. Then, as a new thought occurred to her, she added, “Or what if someone else is trying to sneak in? What if there’s someone else already in there?”
“Wow!” exclaimed Vinyl. “What a twist!” She peered inside the vent. “Do you think it’s safe to go in?” she asked, her voice having a slight echo thanks to the air duct.
“I would rather try my luck with the vent than the guards out the front,” Octavia said, shrugging. She moved Vinyl out of the way and crawled inside the vent, leaving the unicorn to climb in after her and then levitate the vent cover back on.
“It’s a bit of a security leak, isn’t it?” Vinyl asked as the two ponies continued to crawl through the air duct.
“Hmm?”
“You’d think they would have covered up the vent a bit better, or something, wouldn’t you?” Vinyl said. “Why is this air duct even here?”
Octavia waved a hoof dismissively as best as she could in the air duct, which was not very. “They will connect to fans somewhere, I imagine.”
“So you’re saying that we wouldn’t be able to make it this far without the fans?” Vinyl asked. “Because without the fans, this air duct wouldn’t exist.”
“Yes, I suppose that is true,” Octavia confirmed. “If it weren’t for the fans, we wouldn’t have gotten as far as we have, nor would any of this exist.”
“Wow!” said Vinyl, in complete awe. “Thanks, fans! We owe you a lot!”
Without a reply from them, Vinyl had no way of knowing whether or not the fans had heard her or not, but she liked to think that they had. Either way, it wouldn’t make her appreciate them any less.
The two ponies crawled along the air duct for a few minutes, keeping quiet now in case any guards down below heard them. Although it was cramped and somewhat claustrophobic, the two ponies kept going on, hoping to find someplace where they could open up the vent and drop down into what would hopefully be an empty room. Every few metres they would stop and listen to see what they could hear around them, whether any guards could hear their crawling or would give up any juicy information.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Vinyl?” Octavia asked quietly during one of these intervals. Her voice was hard for Vinyl to hear, being directed in the opposite direction to Vinyl’s ears and in a reverberant duct.
“Today: Equestria, tomorrow: the world?” Vinyl replied.
“No,” Octavia said bluntly. “Do you see that vent opening around where my back hooves are?”
“Uhh…” Vinyl had had a very delightful view during her travel through the air duct so far, and she had to tear her eyes away from it to see what Octavia was talking about. “Yeah. You want I should open it up and we can see what’s below?”
“Yes, I haven’t heard any –” Before Octavia could even finish her sentence, the sound of a door swinging open sounded from below the duct the two were in.
“-don’t see what all the fuss about this added security feature is,” echoed a voice from below. “So what if a chariot might have been seen in the sky? Nopony’s gonna land on the island, and even if they do, they wouldn’t stand a chance of getting near us. It’s all a bunch of horseapples!”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” followed a second voice. “But what the boss says is what goes. C’mon, let’s go get those new security cards from the first floor.”
“And what if I decide I don’t want a new security card?” replied the first voice. “What if I decide not to in protest of overly complicated and unnecessary security measures?”
“You plan on going down below the ground floor?” asked the second voice. There was a pause. “ZAP! That’s what’ll happen if you don’t want the new security card. Now c’mon, quit wasting time, and let’s go!”
The voice of the first pony continued to grumble as the two voices faded into the distance, followed by the sound of a door shutting. Vinyl and Octavia were silent for a few moments, before Vinyl said, “Convenient information.”
“Yes,” said Octavia. “Almost…too convenient, isn’t it?”
“…Um, no?” Vinyl said in response. “If it’s convenient for us, it’s convenient! What does too convenient even mean?”
That made Octavia hesitate before answering. “Well, I – I mean, the chance of those two guards entering whatever room is below us together, spouting off information relevant to us, and then immediately leaving is rather unlikely, is it not?”
“But it just did happen,” Vinyl countered. “If something’s unlikely, then it might not have a high chance of happening, sure. But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible, right? Sometimes life’s just full of little coincidences and conveniences like that.”
“That doesn’t make it realistic,” Octavia said. “It feels like an excuse to hastily get us to the next set piece we need to be at.”
“And what the hay does that matter, as long as we get the job done and have fun doing it?” Vinyl asked.
“Well…” Octavia thought it over for a moment. “What if it’s a trap? What if they were intentionally trying to lead us somewhere?”
“So you think that two guards walking randomly around the research facility, spouting out a few lines to draw us somewhere when they don’t even know we’re in here or that we exist, is more likely than two guards talking about an unenjoyable part of their job?”
Octavia sighed. “Just move back a bit. I’m getting a bloody cramp.” Vinyl complied, and moved back enough that Octavia could reach the vent opening and open it. The two ponies dropped out of the air duct and into what looked like a locker room.
“What does it even matter if it’s unlikely?” Vinyl asked as the two ponies dusted themselves off.
“I studied Classical Literature in university,” Octavia said, with a slight hint of arrogance in her tone. “It’s bad writing is all.”
“It’s not writing at all,” Vinyl pointed out. “It’s our life. And anyway, a few bad writing moments like that in the story – the story of our life, that is – never hurt anypony.”
Octavia wanted to argue the point further with Vinyl, to tell her that rather than making excuses for bad writing, effort should be put in to fix the bad writing in the first place, particularly when it has been noticed in such an obvious manner. But she didn’t want to get into a discussion with Vinyl over such a silly topic, and so instead she gave Vinyl a kiss on the cheek. And then another one a moment later, because she liked kissing Vinyl, and Vinyl in turn liked receiving her kisses.
Resuming a more professional stance, Octavia slowly pushed open the door, and upon seeing that the corridor outside was empty, snuck out with Vinyl. The guards outside had all been wearing uniforms, so there was unfortunately no chance of the two ponies pretending to be guards if they were spotted by their foes.
Octavia was ready to explore the corridor further – there were several doors along it containing who knows what – but a nudge from Vinyl pointed out a staircase heading upwards to the next floor right next to the room they had just been in. They would be able to head up there and find the security cards mentioned by the guards earlier. It was all very convenient.
“Not a word,” said Octavia. Vinyl grinned silently as she lead the way up the stairs and to the first floor. From what the two ponies could see, the first floor was identical to the ground floor: a blank white corridor with some doors and corners, leading off into further directions.
“What now?” Vinyl asked.
Octavia shrugged. “We’ll search around and find out?” she suggested.
The first door they opened lead to a laboratory, which didn’t look as though it had been used since Baron von Darkhoof had moved into the facility.
“Super Soldier Serum: Test #1,941?” Octavia read aloud from a dusty folder sitting on a bench. She flipped it open out of curiosity. “Hay, it says this was successful!” she said excitedly.
“Irrelevant,” said Vinyl. “Next!”
The next door in the corridor lead into a small room, also looking abandoned. There wasn’t much there, aside from a lone filing cabinet. At some unknown point in the past, it had been knocked over, and was spilling its contents to the ground.
“Weapon Plus program: Subject number ten…bonding metal to bone…artificial – no, wait, it says they’re bone – claws…” This time, it was Vinyl who had picked up a folder and was flipping through it.
“Anything interesting in there?” Octavia asked. Vinyl gave a noncommittal shrug.
“I don’t see anything wrong with the inherent concept, but I wouldn’t want it to get overexposed,” she said, tossing the folder back to the ground. “Next room!”
The third door in the corridor lead to a much larger room than the previous two combined. Unlike them, it wasn’t disused, a fact that Vinyl and Octavia realised almost immediately when they realised who the occupant of the room was.
“You!” gasped Octavia.
“Me,” said the occupant smugly.
“That particular pony is here?” Vinyl exclaimed. “Wow! What a twist!”