//------------------------------//
// Unpleasant Dreams 
// Story: Guarded Emotions 
// by Alabenson 
//------------------------------//

“Twilight, darling, have a seat. There’s something that we feel we need to discuss,”
Twilight looked around at the café table in front of her uncertainly. Originally she had been delighted when Rarity had asked her to join the rest of her friends for lunch. A diversion like that was exactly what Twilight felt she needed, especially given the recent troubles she had been having with her bodyguard. Several weeks had passed since Twilight had confronted Moonwhisper, and thus far things were showing little sign of improving. Granted, Moonwhisper had apologized to her soon after the incident regarding his reaction and at the time he had seemed genuinely remorseful. What’s more, Moonwhisper had dutifully made arrangements to begin having weekly sessions with a local psychologist named Conscious Mind who worked at Ponyville General.  However, despite all of that it seemed as though to Twilight that Moonwhisper was more distant than ever before. He rarely spoke to her anymore, unless she addressed him directly, and even then his response seemed even more terse and impersonal than usual. 
“The truth of the matter is, Twi, it just seems like y’all’ve been a bit out of sorts lately, and we’re startin’ to get worried.” Applejack said as Twilight took a seat.
“Ever since Applejack’s birthday you’ve really been, I don’t know, mopey. Like, almost all the time.” Rainbow Dash added.
“I know, I know,” Twilight sighed, “it’s just I don’t know what to do about-“
“Moonwhisper?” Rarity said flatly, to which Twilight responded with a nod. “That’s part of what we wanted to talk to you about. It just seems to us that you’re, how should I put this delicately, obsessing a touch over the dear captain.”
“Obsessing?” Twilight exclaimed, somewhat offended.
“He’s practically the only thing you talk about these days.” Rainbow Dash snorted. “Look, we get it, you feel sorry for him. Hay, all of us feel sorry for him, he went through some really messed up stuff. But, seriously, maybe it’s time to accept that Moonwhisper just isn’t somepony that you’re going to be able to help.”
“Ah really hate to say it, but Rainbow Dash may be right about this,” Applejack added. “Fact of the matter is y’all’ve done everythin’ anypony could ask of y’ and then some already. Moonwhisper just might not be somepony we can help, leastways not with him the way he is right now.”
Twilight looked around the table in complete shock. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, you don’t really feel that way too, do you?”
Both mares looked distinctly uncomfortable as Twilight addressed them. In particular, Pinkie Pie started contorting herself as though it was physically painful to put her response to words. “Moonwhisper’s just totally unhappyable right now!” Pinkie Pie finally managed to blurt out. “He isn’t interested in having fun or making friends, or, or, or being happy! Happiness just makes him sad or angry.” Pinkie Pie let out a sob and collapsed forwards onto the table. “How can you get somepony to smile when being happy makes them unhappy?”
“I think what Pinkie Pie means is that there really isn’t all that much more we can do for Moonwhisper right now.” Fluttershy added. “We’re not saying that we should give up on Moonwhisper forever, but he’s sick right now and I think the best thing we can do is let his doctor help him get better.”
“And what if Conscious Mind can’t help him?” Twilight asked solemnly. 
“Twilight, dear, don’t be ridiculous. Conscious Mind is the finest psychologist in Ponyville.” Rarity assured her.
“Beggin’ yer pardon, Rarity, but Ah’m pretty sure she’s the only shrink in Ponyville.”
Rarity shot Applejack a annoyed glare before continuing. “Be that as it may, Conscious Mind is still a very reputable psychologist. There’s really no reason to think that she would have any difficulty in helping Moonwhisper overcome his past.”
Twilight shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “Actually, I’m not so sure about that. I’ve been talking with Conscious Mind, and it seems like she’s having even less luck with Moonwhisper than we had.”
“And just how in the hay did y’all get Conscious Mind to tell y’ somethin’ like that?” Applejack demanded. “Now, Ah ain’t exactly an expert on this sort of thing, but isn’t the stuff that somepony tells their shrink supposed to stay between the two of ‘em?”
“Well, yes, and doctor-patient confidentiality means that Conscious Mind can’t tell me about anything that she and Moonwhisper actually discuss, at least not without his consent. But the regulation I used to get Moonwhisper to see her in the first place also allows me to request updates on his general progress.” Twilight let out a sad sigh as she continued. “And from what she’s told me, Moonwhisper hasn’t made any progress at all. Moonwhisper won’t even talk to her, he just sits there and glares at her for an hour every week.”
“Twilight, I had to sound callous, but what in Equestria do you think you could actually do about that?” Rarity asked. “You’ve already done everything in your power to befriend Moonwhisper, and even found a way to get him professional help despite him fighting you tooth and hoof on the issue. Even if you do see him as your friend, there are limits to how far you can go to help him.” Rarity coughed nervously and glance around the table before going on. “And besides, darling, all this focus on Moonwhisper is, how shall I put this…ponies are starting to talk.”
“Huh? What do you mean by that?” Twilight asked, cocking her head to one side in confusion.
“She means ponies are saying you’re only going through all this for Moonwhisper because you have a crush on him.” Rainbow Dash snapped. “Seriously, you can be so clueless sometimes.”
“That’s just ridiculous! I’m doing all of this because Moonwhisper is my friend, not because I want to date him or anything!” Twilight lifted herself up on her forelegs as she responded, blushing uncontrollably. 
“We ain’t sayin’ it’d be anythin’ to be ashamed of if y’ did.” Applejack said in an effort to calm her friend down. “Y’all certainly wouldn’t be the first mare to go a little nutty over a stallion she liked, and there are certainly worse ways to do it than tryin’ to help him sort out the mess in his head.” As Applejack spoke she gave Rarity a meaningful glance. “Like tryin’ to pass yerself off as a farm pony, for example.”
Rarity winced at being reminded of that particular fiasco. “I will admit that I’ve made some…questionable decisions in the past when trying to impress one stallion or another. Our point, however, is that if you are going to these lengths for Moonwhisper due to your having romantic feelings for him then you should at least be able to admit it, to yourself at least if nothing else.”
“I can’t believe this. Do you all really think that the only reason I’m trying to help Moonwhisper is because I have a crush on him?” Twilight asked, slumping back into her seat. 
“Well, we don’t think it’s the only reason,” Fluttershy admitted, “but it would help explain why you seem so, um, focused on him.”
Twilight gritted her teeth in frustration as she tried to form a coherent response, without much success. “That’s because…I’m trying to…Moonwhisper’s…I mean…GAH!” Twilight sputtered before finally letting out an exasperated yell. Without another word Twilight hopped out of her seat and stormed off, leaving her friends looking on in concern. “I can’t believe them,” Twilight fumed as she made her way back to her castle, “they honestly think that I’d really be doing all this because of some crush. What do they think I am, some silly little love-struck schoolfilly?” It wasn’t that Twilight found the idea of attracted to Moonwhisper to be unappealing, but rather it was that she found the notion that her friends would think that would be her primary motivation to be insulting. Moonwhisper was her friend, he was clearly suffering, and nopony, not even Moonwhisper himself seemed to care enough to really do something about it. “The fact that he’s my friend should be reason enough,” Twilight muttered to herself, “so what if Moonwhisper is brilliant, and devoted, and looks kind of dreamy…wait, dreamy…dreams…THAT’S IT!” Twilight suddenly exclaimed. “If I can’t get through to Moonwhisper consciously, then I’ll just have to get through to him through his subconscious instead.” Twilight picked up her pace, practically galloping towards the castle as a new plan formed in her mind. “I’ll just have to leave a note for Moonwhisper so he doesn’t start to ask questions about where I am. I’ll say I needed to go to Canterlot to speak with the princess about an urgent friendship problem. I mean, that would all be technically true…”

*********

“You’d like me to do WHAT?” Asked an incredulous Princess Luna.
“I’d like your help to show my friend Moonwhisper that he should let himself be happy. I think if I can finally get him to let go of the idea that he needs to be alone and miserable all the time then he’ll finally be able to start accepting friendship. Please, princess,” Twilight implored, “Moonwhisper is suffering and I’m running out of ideas on how to help him. You know better than almost anypony how hard it can be to let go of the past.” Twilight added.
Princess Luna regarded Twilight for a moment before responding. “While I do indeed sympathize with your bodyguard’s plight, what you’re asking isn’t as simple a task as you may think. I’ve been well aware of Captain Moonwhisper’s pain for quite some time. However, to enter his dreams, as I presume you are asking me to do, will be challenge even for me.”
“What? Why? You enter ponies’ dreams to help them all the time, why would Moonwhisper’s dreams be any different?” Twilight asked.
“The difference lies in Moonwhisper himself. He has apparently gone through extensive training to resist most forms of magical mental intrusion, including the magic I use to enter the dreams of others.”
“I see,” Twilight said, clearly crestfallen at this news. Never had the possibility even remotely crossed her mind that Princess Luna would be unable to penetrate Moonwhisper’s dreams. “If you really can’t enter Moonwhisper’s dreams, then I guess-“
“I beg your pardon, I never said that I couldn’t enter Moonwhisper’s mind, only that doing so would be quite difficult.” Princess Luna interrupted in a tone of mock offense. “To tell the truth I’ve been looking for an excuse to look into Moonwhisper’s dreams for some time now. Even without entering his dreams I’ve noticed that Moonwhisper seems to suffer from nightmares with alarming frequency.”
“That doesn’t really surprise me,” Twilight said sadly. “How soon do you think you’d be able to try? I know I asked you kind of suddenly, is there anything you’d need to do to prepare? If there’s anything you’d need to know about Moonwhisper and his past I could-“
Princess Luna quickly raised a hoof to silence Twilight before she could continue. “I can assure you I am already well-versed in Moonwhisper’s past, perhaps even more so than you yourself. You can return to Ponyville; I will visit Moonwhisper in his dreams tonight.”
Thanking Princess Luna for her help, Twilight quickly exited, leaving the Princess of the Night to whatever preparations she would need. So far everything was going according to her plan, though Twilight hadn’t expected that getting Luna’s cooperation would be particularly difficult. The real question would be Luna would have any greater success in reaching Moonwhisper than anypony else had. While Twilight had great faith in Luna’s abilities, she had no intention of simply sitting back and doing nothing in the meantime. Twilight may not have possessed the magic needed to confront somepony in their dreams directly, but that didn’t mean she was completely without options of her own.

*********

Despite trying to save time by flying back, by the time Twilight returned to Ponyville Princess Celestia had already started to lower the sun. With nightfall rapidly approaching, Twilight knew that Moonwhisper would be soon beginning his evening routine. First he would check in at her castle, confirming with whoever answered the door that everything was alright. Inevitably Moonwhisper would follow this up by circling the castle’s exterior to check for anything that looked out of place. Once he was satisfied that there was nothing suspicious at the castle that needed his attention, Moonwhisper would begin making a full patrol of Ponyville itself, first marching through the town proper and then along the edges, paying particular attention to the places where the Everfree Forest abutted ponies’ homes. Finally, Moonwhisper would return to the castle for one more perimeter inspection before heading back to the room he rented from Bulk Biceps and turn in for the night. It was an incredibly steady routine, predicable almost to the point that one could set their clock by it. Tonight, that routine meant that Twilight would be easily able to guess when Moonwhisper would be going to sleep. As Twilight approached the castle from the sky she could see that Moonwhisper was already checking in with Spike. Not wanting to speak with Moonwhisper before Luna had a chance to confront him, Twilight landed on one of the castle balconies, bypassing the doors altogether. However, as Twilight started to go inside she suddenly paused and cautiously inched over to the balcony railing. Nearing the edge, Twilight quietly cast a spell to enhance her hearing, enabling her to make out the conversation below.
“-evermind, it would appear that Princess Twilight just returned.” Twilight could hear Moonwhisper say, as clearly as if he were standing right next to her. 
“Wait, really, where is she then?” Came the familiar voice of Twilight’s favorite dragon. It wasn’t particularly surprising to Twilight that Spike had been the one to greet Moonwhisper, given that the young dragon seemed far more comfortable around Moonwhisper than Starlight Glimmer did. Privately, Twilight suspected at least part of that stemmed from the fact that Spike was just happy to have another stallion to talk with (Big Macintosh may have been a good listener but he wasn’t much of a conversationalist). 
“I say the princess land on the north balcony a few moments ago.” Moonwhisper said, snapping Twilight back to the present. “At least, I presume it was Princess Twilight. She and Princess Cadance are close enough in size that I may have misidentified her due to the distance and lighting, but I consider that to be an unlikely scenario.
“If you say so.” Spike replied, not sounding particularly convinced.
“In any event, a winged pony just landed on the castle balcony overhead. Based on the shape of their wings I can tell that they are an alicorn as opposed to a pegasi, and a rough estimate of her height rules out Princess Celestia or Princess Luna. So, baring Princess Cadance paying the castle a visit, it would be safe to assume that Princess Twilight has just arrived home.”
“Huh.” Spike said simply evidently unsure of how to react to Moonwhisper’s deductive skills. “Say, if Twilight’s really back why don’t you come in for a bit? I know Twilight misses those chess games you used to have with her.”
Frantically, Twilight began trying to think of an excuse to send Moonwhisper away should he take Spike up on his invitation. Luckily for her, it turned out to be a moot issue. “I…I’ll have to decline. I really should be getting back to my evening patrols.” Strangely, it seemed to Twilight that there was a distinct tinge of sadness in Moonwhisper’s voice as he turned down Spike’s offer. “Please give my regards to Princess Twilight.” Moonwhisper added after a moment’s silence before galloping off into the night.
Twilight spent a minute of two pondering if there was any special meaning to the exchange between her bodyguard and assistant before putting it out of her mind. Most of Moonwhisper’s behavior made little sense to Twilight, particularly since her confrontation with him over his past. Besides, at that moment Twilight had more pressing concerns regarding Moonwhisper than one overheard conversation. While Twilight may not have been able to shape other ponies’ dreams the way Princess Luna could, through careful study she had reached the point that she could reliably enter and observe them. Granted, taking on a role other than invisible observer was still beyond Twilight’s abilities, but tonight that would be all she needed. Twilight’s plan was simple; once Princess Luna entered Moonwhisper’s mind she would sneak in behind her and watch Luna go to work. With any luck, Moonwhisper’s dreams, and Luna’s with them, would provide valuable insight into Moonwhisper himself. At least that was what Twilight kept telling herself anyway. Of course, that would all have to wait for Moonwhisper to actually go to sleep, which Twilight guessed wouldn’t be for another hour or two at the very least. That left her plenty of time to prepare herself for the night ahead.

*********

“Anyway, Trixie and I are going to be heading into Canterlot tomorrow night.” Starlight Glimmer said as she munched on her dinner. “Apparently the Canterlot Museum is having this special exhibit on Hoofdini and Trixie’s really excited about it.”
“Uh huh, that’s nice.” Twilight half-heartedly replied. Normally the mere mention of Trixie’s name was enough to set Twilight’s teeth on edge, but tonight her mind was occupied with other matters. A state of affairs that did not go unnoticed.
“Twilight, are you feeling alright?” Starlight asked. “It seems like you’ve been a little out of it all night.”
“She’s probably just disappointed that she missed seeing Moonwhisper when he stopped by.” Spike said before Twilight had a chance to respond. “Honestly, I don’t get why you’re always edgy around him, Starlight.” Spike continued as helped himself to seconds. “Moonwhisper’s actually a really nice guy once you get to know him. Sure he’s a little uptight, but who wouldn’t be if their dad used crazy torture magic on them?”
“I know, it’s not that.” Starlight said. “It’s just something about him, I don’t know, makes me a little nervous. I think the best way to describe it is that it’s the same sort of feeling I get around Fluttershy’s bear friend.”
“Now I know you’re being ridiculous, Harry wouldn’t hurt a fly, right Twilight?”
“Mmhmm.” Twilight replied, pushing the found around on her plate with a levitating fork. By her calculations, Moonwhisper was most likely on his way home by now. While Twilight wasn’t certain what kind of routine Moonwhisper might have had for once he returned to his room, she did know that he habitually was up even earlier than Applejack. That meant that Moonwhisper would likely be in bed within the next hour or so at most.
“Hey! Equestria to Twilight!” Spike called out, startling Twilight badly. “Geez, Twilight, Starlight’s right, you really are out of it tonight.”
“I’m sorry,” Twilight apologized, “I’ve just been preoccupied lately with…a project of mine that Princess Luna is helping me with.” For some reason, Twilight found that she didn’t want to admit all the details of what she had planned that night.
“Does this have anything to do with that dreamwalking spell you’ve been working on?” Starlight asked, her interest suddenly piqued. “Because if it is I’d love to hear what Princess Luna had to say about the progress you’ve been making. Speaking of which, I have a few ideas about boosting the manifestation power I’d like to run by you later.”
“Wait, dreamwalking? You mean like going into other ponies’ dreams and stuff?” Spike asked in a panicked tone. “You haven’t looked into any of my dreams, have you? Because I don’t mean to dream any of that stuff, it just happens. And besides, I don’t even like butterscotch pudding.”
“And on that note I think I’m going to call it a night.” Twilight said as she excused herself from the table. While it was certainly true that Twilight did not want any context for Spike’s last remark, it had provided her with an excellent excuse to head to her room and begin the preparations for her spell. Leaving Spike to Starlight’s bemused questions, Twilight quickly slipped out of the dining room and made a beeline straight for her bedroom. Once there Twilight promptly locked the doors behind her and then wedged a chair against them for good measure. Finally satisfied that she wasn’t going to be interrupted, Twilight magically opened a drawer and levitated out several scrolls as she climbed up onto her bed. After taking a moment to make herself comfortable Twilight unfurled the largest of the scrolls and began channeling her magic through it. The spell itself was a bit of a hodgepodge of several different pieces of magic, several of which were quite advanced and one of which had been buried deep within the Canterlot Archives. The challenge of casting the spell came from the difficulty in pushing one’s consciousness into the realm of dreams without losing control. Several of Twilight’s early attempts had resulted in her being rendered unconscious for several hours, during which she experienced particularly vivid dreams (her attempts to investigate a cult of Trixie worshipers accompanied by a deformed talking rat had been especially memorable). As the spell began to take effect, Twilight could feel her mind start to press against the barrier between dreams and reality. To Twilight the process felt as though she were trying to force her head through a rubber sheet, the barrier between Equestria and the dreamworld stretching out and trying to pull her back to reality. Until, eventually, Twilight found a tiny weak spot, a single pinprick in the metaphysical boundaries between the worlds. After what felt like an eternity of straining herself, Twilight finally pushed through, her body collapsing onto the bed. To an outside observer it would have appeared that Twilight had simply fallen asleep, a faint glow surrounding her horn the only sign that her mind had entered another world.

*********

At first, Twilight’s entrance into the dreamworld was initially so subtle as to be barely perceptible. A thin lavender wisp of cloud leaked into the dreamworld from some unseen hole. Gradually the cloud grew, slowly coalescing into the approximate shape of a pony until it finally snapped into the form of Twilight Sparkle. Or, at the very least most of the form of Twilight Sparkle.
“Darn it, I still can’t manage a complete manifestation.” Twilight huffed as she looked herself over. While her front half had taken its proper shape, everything behind her wings was still just a hazy cloud of lavender smoke trailing off behind her. This state of affairs didn’t Twilight overmuch, however, particularly since if all went well nopony would actually see her anyway. With a shrug Twilight dismissed the issue and took stock of her surroundings. She found herself floating in a vast star-filled void, nothing but twinkling lights visible in any direction. When Twilight closed her eyes and concentrated, however, hundreds of doors rushed by her to either side, each one leading to the dreams of a different pony. The first several times Twilight had visited the dreamworld the sheer vastness of it had intimidated her, but repeated trips had taught her the trick of navigating her way through the vast emptiness via sheer willpower. Focusing her mind, Twilight willed herself towards the door concealing Moonwhisper’s dreams, expecting that by now he would be asleep. As Twilight reached her destination, however, she was faced with a pair of surprises. 
The first surprise was the fact that Princess Luna was already there. In retrospect it should have been no shock that the Princess of the Night would have been ready the moment Moonwhisper fell asleep. Even so, Twilight had been certain that she would have reached the door first given her knowledge of Moonwhisper’s habits. What came as a much bigger shock was the appearance of the door that led into Moonwhisper’s mind. Most of the dream portals took the form of simple wooden doors, the sort one might expect to find as the front door of somepony’s home. The portal into Moonwhisper’s mind, however, appeared to be a heavy steel security door, barred shut against any intruders. Drawing closer, Twilight could see that the door was surrounded by a shimmering dark blue aura as Princess Luna did her best to magically pry it open. Princess Luna’s horn shone with a blinding light as she struggled to force the stubborn barrier open, and Twilight recalled what Princess Luna had said about how Moonwhisper’s mind was warded against intrusion. Just when Twilight began to worry that even Princess Luna’s magic wouldn’t be up to the task, the door suddenly shuddered. Moments later the door creaked open a hairsbreadth, just enough to signal that whatever force had been holding it shut was now defeated. Any pleasure that Twilight may have taken in this development quickly vanished, however, as panicked screams, muffled though unmistakably Moonwhisper, soon began emanating from beyond the door. Hearing this, Twilight rushed forward towards the door, only to be halted by the sound of Princess Luna clearing her throat. Looking up, Twilight saw that Princess Luna was staring down at her, disapproval written across her features. For a brief moment Twilight was confused by this; her previous excursions into the dreamworld had shown her that her spectral form was invisible to other ponies. In her haste, Twilight had never actually considered the possibility that Princess Luna would be any different. Before Princess Luna had a chance to voice her disapproval at Twilight’s presence, however, another series of screams emerged from the portal leading into Moonwhisper’s mind. Letting out a sigh of resignation, Princess Luna turned and threw the door wide open before striding inside. Quickly recovering from the shock that Princess Luna was able to see her, Twilight hurried inside as well, the door slamming shut behind her.
As Twilight entered the dream, she found herself floating over the streets of the Crystal Empire, or rather a dark, twisted caricature of it. While the Crystal Empire Twilight knew in the waking world was filled with warmth and love, here it was cold and bleak. Everywhere Twilight looked the colors were dark and muted, the jagged crystalline spikes jutting out from the buildings casting weird, grasping shadows into the empty streets. Looking closer, Twilight could see countless cold, malice-filled eyes peering out from the shadows. As Twilight took in the disturbing view a desperate cry echoing out from one of the side streets seized her attention.
“No, please! That’s not me, I swear that isn’t who I am!” Moonwhisper came galloping down a cross street, only to rear up in terror as he reached the main thoroughfare. After looking wildly around, Moonwhisper turned around and began cautiously backing into the street, his ears folded back and eyes wide in terror. As he crept back, however, his rear hoof knocked over a bucket of water that Twilight would have sworn wasn’t there before, sending its contents splashing onto the ground. A puddle quickly formed next to Moonwhisper, and to Twilight’s shock the reflection in the water wasn’t Moonwhisper’s, but rather that of King Sombra. Seeing this, Moonwhisper bolted away, but now it seemed that every surface he passed had been polished to a mirror-like finish, and in every case Moonwhisper’s reflection had been replaced with King Sombra’s grinning visage. As Moonwhisper jumped from one twisted reflection to the next the various reflective surfaces began to lift themselves up and move to encircle him. Moonwhisper didn’t seem to notice this until it was too late and he was completely surrounded. Realizing he was trapped, Moonwhisper was reduced to curling himself up into a ball, whimpering as the reflections began laughing manically.
“Enough!” Princess Luna thundered, letting loose a wave of magic that shattered the monstrous reflections. “It would appear to me that our meeting is one that quite overdue,” Princess Luna said as she landed. “Tell me, Captain Moonwhisper, is this,” Luna gestured towards the shattered crystals littering the ground, “truly how you see yourself?”
Moonwhisper pulled himself to his hooves and vigorously shook himself in an effort to regain his composure before answering. “With all due respect, your highness,” he said, all traces of vulnerability erased from his features, “what in Equestria are you doing here? I have to imagine that the Princess of the Night would have far better things to do than poke around in my mind.”
“As I said, this is a meeting that is long overdue. I’ve come to help show you your own worth, since you seem to be having difficulty seeing it on your own. Whether you realize it or not, captain, Equestria would be a far darker place in your absence.”
Several seconds ticked by as Moonwhisper regarded Princess Luna before eventually responding. “Tell me the truth, your highness, did Princess Twilight put you up to this nonsense?”
“Princess Twilight Sparkle did voice some concerns she had about your wellbeing.” Princess Luna admitted somewhat guiltily. “However, I would not be here if I did not truly feel that I was needed,” she swiftly added.
If Moonwhisper was listening, however, he certainly didn’t look it. Upon hearing Princess Luna confirm Twilight’s involvement, Moonwhisper had brought his hoof to his forehead, his eyes squeezed shut as though he had suddenly developed a headache. As he did so, it seemed to Twilight that the entire dream started to violently shudder and quake. The shaking quickly ceased as abruptly as it had started, however, and neither Moonwhisper nor Princess Luna seemed to have noticed a thing. “Very well then,” Moonwhisper sighed with an air of resignation, having apparently recovered from his headache, “since there’s not really much I can do to stop this I may as well get it over with. So tell me, your highness, how exactly do you intend to prove to me that Equestria benefits from my continued existence?” As surprised as Twilight was to hear the acid in the tone Moonwhisper used to address Princess Luna she had to admit she was curious about how Luna was planning to go about this herself.
“You’ll soon see,” Princess Luna cryptically replied, “but first I feel a slight adjustment in our surroundings is in order.” With that, Princess Luna raised her head and unleashed a massive wave of brilliant magical energy from her horn. As Twilight’s vision cleared, she saw that the twisted nightmare version of the Crystal Empire had been transformed into the Crystal Empire she knew from the working world. At least, that’s how it appeared to Twilight at first glance, but something about it felt distinctly off. Everything, from the crystalline buildings to the crystal ponies themselves, seemed to be missing the vibrancy that made the Crystal Empire truly shine.
While Twilight may not have been able to put her hoof on what was wrong with this version of the Crystal Empire, the effect it was having on Moonwhisper was painfully obvious. Moonwhisper’s ears were folded back against his head as his eyes rapidly darted back and forth, a look of pure panic stamped onto his features. “Is there a particular reason your lecture needs to take place here, your highness?” Moonwhisper asked as he struggled to maintain his composure.
“If it would help put you at ease, nopony here can see or hear you. As far as the ponies here are concerned you are nothing more than an invisible, insubstantial phantom.” As if to prove her point, Princess Luna nudged Moonwhisper into the path of one of the crystal ponies walking down the street. To the shock of both Moonwhisper and Twilight, the pony simply walked straight through Moonwhisper as if he were a ghost. “You see, captain? From their perspective you don’t even exist.” Princess Luna said with a mischievous smile. “That said, there are perhaps other places in Equestria that may illustrate my point even more effectively. Shall we?” Seeing Moonwhisper quietly nod his head, Princess Luna stamped one of her forehooves on the ground, sending the entire world spinning madly around them. As the world slowed and finally came a stop, Twilight could see that Princess Luna had transported them to Canterlot. Once again, however, something felt very wrong to Twilight about the city she found herself floating over. While visually nothing about the city seemed any different, save perhaps for the grey overcast sky, there was something about the sad, anxious looks in the eyes of the ponies on the streets that left Twilight with an uncomfortable sense of foreboding.
Whatever it was that Twilight was sensing, it was quickly apparent that Moonwhisper had picked up on it as well. “Your highness, what exactly are you up to? I was stationed in Canterlot long enough to know that there’s something different here.”
“Why don’t you try taking a walk down that avenue over there?” Princess Luna replied, gesturing towards a nearby intersection. “I’m certain you’ll find the answers you’re looking for there.”
Letting out an irritated sigh, Moonwhisper headed towards the avenue, muttering under his breath the entire time. Twilight followed closely behind, floating overhead as she watched Moonwhisper plow through the ponies on the street, passing through them as he had done so with the crystal pony earlier. As they made their way onward, Twilight quickly realized that they were headed towards a small plaza not far from where she had grown up. It wasn’t anything particularly elaborate, just a roundabout with a small patch of grass and flowers in the center, but Twilight had fond memories of reading there when she was a filly. When the pair reached the plaza, however, Twilight was shocked at what she saw. The garden at the center was gone; in its place was a large sculpture depicting several guardsponies. The sculpture was on a raised base, the sides of which were covered with inscriptions of some kind with a plaque set into the bottom. Though Twilight was too far away to make out the writing on either the plaque or the base itself, the various flowers that had been laid along the base indicated to her that it was a memorial of some kind. After staring at the memorial for several seconds, Moonwhisper’s face took on a disgusted expression. “You have to joking, are you really resorting to this tired old cliché?”
Unsure of what Moonwhisper was talking about, Twilight decided to take a closer look at the monument. Floating over to it, Twilight could see that the inscriptions on the memorial’s base were in fact a list of names. Initially Twilight was confused as to the significance of this, until a small object laid amid the flowers at the memorial’s base caught her eye. A small doll had been placed at the base of the memorial, specifically Shining Armor’s favorite foalhood toy, Brutus Force. Moreover, as Twilight looked up from the doll to the inscriptions above it she saw Shining Armor among the assembled names. Slowly, Twilight backed away from the memorial, a palpable sense of horror weighing down on her. As she floated past the plaque at the base, Twilight paused to look down and read it, confirming her suspicions in the process. 

This memorial stands in memory of the brave mares and stallions who gave their lives to protect the citizens of Equestria. Their valor is an example to us all, and their sacrifices will never be forgotten.

“Well, Captain Moonwhisper, what do you have to say so far about this Equestria, one where you never existed?” Princess Luna’s voice rang out as she made her down the avenue towards Moonwhisper. When Moonwhisper only let out an irritated snort in response Princess Luna continued. “Without your heroics, the infamous gargoyle migration would have resulted in a massacre. Dozens upon dozens of ponies would have died, including Shining Armor. Without him, Princess Flurry Heart will never be born, and Princess Cadance will live out her life without her true love beside her.”
“By that logic, Canterlot should be overrun with changelings by now, since Shining Armor won’t be there to banish them with his magic.” Moonwhisper grumbled. “Unless,” he added after thinking about it for a moment, “without Shining Armor’s love to feed on, Chrysalis wouldn’t be about to stand up to Princess Celestia in actual combat.”
“An astute analysis, captain.” Princess Luna replied with a nod. “You are correct, even without Shining Armor, the changeling invasion of Canterlot would have been thwarted. However, that victory would have come at a cost nonetheless, as the unveiling of the changeling threat would have crippled the ability for ponies to trust one another.”
“Frankly, it sounds to me as though this whole spectacle has more to do with Shining Armor than it does me.” Moonwhisper growled. “Then again, it figures that my great contribution to the welfare of Equestria would be saving Princess Twilight’s…half-wit…” Moonwhisper screwed his eyes shut and abruptly turned away from Princess Luna. “You know what, never mind. I have to assume that you have more planned for me than,” Moonwhisper jerked a hoof towards the memorial, “that nonsense, so show me what else you have up your sleeve.”
If Princess Luna was bothered by Moonwhisper’s combative attitude she didn’t show it, instead simply opening up a shimmering portal and striding through it. Scowling fiercely, Moonwhisper quickly followed suit, with Twilight floating close behind. Waiting on the other side of the portal was a path that led through a starry void, which to Twilight appeared nearly identical to the realm that Princess Celestia had taken her to when she first became an alicorn. Only here, instead of visions of Twilight’s time spent in Ponyville with her friends, there were dozens of scenes of disasters of every variety along with ponies mourning their aftermath. As Princess Luna led Moonwhisper down the path she would periodically poignant displays. “Over there you can see the remains of the fire in Manehattan’s Haypacking district, one of the first disasters you responded to after graduating from the Officer’s Academy.” Princess Luna remarked as they passed a scene of several burning apartment buildings. “Of course, in a world where you never existed nopony would have been able to pull those ponies from the fire before the buildings collapsed. And over here is the town of Hoofington, or at least what’s left of it. As I understand it you once drove off a rampaging hydra that tried to attack that little village. That was quite brave of you, considering how few guards would have stood a chance against such a beast. Unfortunately for Hoofington, that would mean that in a world where you were never born, well…” Princess Luna let her voice trail off as she passed a scene of an abandoned village, many of its houses smashed to pieces.
Moonwhisper, however, seemed completely unmoved by the parade of tragedies that Princess Luna had brought forth. Instead, Moonwhisper simple trudged along the path with his head down, grumbling under his breath the entire time. “Just how much more of this do you intend to inflict on me?” Moonwhisper finally asked.
“There is one final scene I have yet to show you, something a bit more recent.” As Princess Luna spoke she spread her wings and took off into the ether. The instant Princess Luna’s hooves left the ground the path beneath Moonwhisper vanished, sending him plummeting into the darkness below. Moonwhisper soon landed with an undignified thump, finding himself in the center of Ponyville not far from the town hall. As Moonwhisper picked himself up off the ground, Twilight, who had followed him during his descent, took stock of their surroundings. What struck Twilight almost immediately was how empty this version of Ponyville seemed. Normally Ponyville’s central hub would be bustling with ponies going about their daily business, but here it felt as though the town had been abandoned. Moonwhisper seemed to notice that something was wrong as well, and as soon as he finished dusting himself off he began cautiously wandering through the empty streets. Floating behind him, Twilight occasionally noticed signs that the town wasn’t quite as empty as it had initially appeared. A pony quickly closing her curtains, shadows cautiously peering out of a window, brief glimpses that showed that ponies were at least present, if not out in the open. It wasn’t until they approached the edges of Ponyville that they started to see ponies out in the open. Curiously, all of the ponies they saw appeared particularly solemn, and many of them were dressed in black. Moreover, everypony seemed to be heading in the general direction of Sweet Apple Acres. This observation came coupled with a sickening realization for Twilight as she quickly made the connection between Sweet Apple Acres and Princess Luna’s mention of Moonwhisper’s recent heroics.
Moonwhisper himself seemed to have made the connection as well, having frozen in his tracks as he noticed the townsponies filing towards the Apple family farm. Floating closer, Twilight could see that Moonwhisper was breathing heavily as he trembled with rage. “No,” Moonwhisper finally managed to snarl through clenched teeth. “No, no, NO! I have had ENOUGH!” As Moonwhisper shouted, he emitted a powerful shockwave that left massive tears in the dreamworld Princess Luna had created, as though it were a painting whose canvas was being torn asunder. “I will not stand here and watch you exploit some little filly’s near-death experience for some tailor-made guilt trip.” Strong winds began to whip around Moonwhisper as he continued to rage, buffeting Twilight as she tried to maintain her position. Shielding her eyes with a forehoof, Twilight could see that the winds were having an even greater effect on the structures and ponies within the dream itself, blowing them away as if they were nothing more than piles of dust. By the time Moonwhisper calmed down, the winds dying down simultaneously, there was little left of the Ponyville Princess Luna had conjured.
“Feel any better?” Princess Luna’s voice asked, seemingly echoing from the dark void that had replaced the sky. Moments later Princess Luna herself appeared overhead in a flash of light. “While I can understand why you’re upset, I hope you can at least see the purpose behind all of this,” she said as she gracefully descended to the ground. “Your actions have saved countless lives and averted untold amounts of sorrow. Regardless of your family’s unfortunate history, Equestria has been incredibly fortunate to have you in it.”
Moonwhisper responded by first closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. When he opened, Moonwhisper face looked oddly calm, almost serene. Twilight wanted to believe that it was a sign that Princess Luna had finally managed to reach Moonwhisper, but something about it felt off. It almost felt as though Twilight were witnessing the calm before a terrible storm. “To be perfectly honest, your highness,” Moonwhisper began in a surprisingly pleasant tone, “I’m actually grateful that you showed all of this to me. I’ve often questioned whether or not I really making a real difference in Equestria, and I will admit it is good to learn that I’d be leaving Equestria in a better state than I entered it in.”
“I’m relieved to hear you say that.” Princess Luna cautiously replied. It was clear from her tone that something about Moonwhisper’s demeanor left her suspicious. “From what I had heard about you I had assumed that you would be more resistant.” 
Moonwhisper simply shrugged in response. “I know myself well enough to understand why you’d assume that. Now, with all this in mind, there is one thing that I would like to ask of you.”
“Of course, captain, what is it that you wish to ask of me?”
“Princess Luna, in light of the contributions I’ve made to the general safety and well-being of the citizens of Equestria, I feel that I’ve earned the opportunity to finally rest.”
“Are you telling me that you wish to retire from the guard?” Princess Luna asked in alarm.
“No, your highness. What I’m saying is that I wish to retire from living entirely.” As Moonwhisper replied with complete seriousness Twilight felt as though her stomach was plummeting into an abyss.
Several seconds of silence passed following Moonwhisper’s declaration as Princess Luna struggled to formulate her response. “Captain, you can’t possibly mean…”
“What I mean is that I don’t want to continue living anymore. I just can’t take it, any of it.” Moonwhisper’s voice started to crack with pain and anger as he erased any possible alternate interpretation of his declaration.
“Captain Moonwhisper, please!” Princess Luna pleaded, “I can understand how Sombra’s legacy must be difficult to endure. Believe me, I know better than most ponies how hard it can be to live with a past that you’re ashamed of. But as bad as it may be you cannot allow yourself to be overwhelmed by it all. You’ve shown such courage in the past, surely you can recall some of that strength.”
“Courage? You honestly think the things I’ve done had anything to do with courage?” Moonwhisper shouted back. “You really don’t know anything about me, do you your highness? Every so-called act of bravery, every alleged heroic deed, it’s all been a lie! I didn’t do any of those things because I’m some kind of hero; I did what I did because I was trying to get myself killed. Time and time again I’d throw myself into harm’s way, hoping with every fiber of my being that whatever danger I faced would finally end me.” Tears began streaming down Moonwhisper’s face as he continued his rant, scarcely pausing to breather. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to be constantly praised for a complete lie?” It was almost outright painful for Twilight to listen to Moonwhisper’s anguished confession. The self-loathing in Moonwhisper’s voice was so unbearable that for a moment Twilight wished she had a physical presence in the dream so she throw her hooves around him and shake him until he snapped out of it.
“Even if what you say is true, that still doesn’t change the fact that you’re actions saved countless lives.” Princess Luna retorted. Despite her best efforts, there was a distinct sound of desperation in her voice. “Think of all the guards who are still alive today thanks to your actions during gargoyle migration, for example.”
“My actions during the gargoyle migration were nothing to be proud of.” Moonwhisper snapped bitterly. “Any good I might have initially accomplished while Shining Armor was still conscious I nearly squandered as soon as I took command. By all logic my vaunted charge against the gargoyles should ended in the deaths of everypony involved. If our reinforcements hadn’t arrived when they did the only thing I’d be remembered for would be getting myself and everypony under my command killed. And don’t try to tell me how it turned out all right in the end either.” Moonwhisper added, anger creeping into his voice. “Nopony under my command may have died, but that doesn’t mean that everything turned out fine.” As Moonwhisper spoke, spectral images of guardsponies began to appear in the air, virtually all of them bearing horrific injuries. “Try telling Private Quick March that everything turned out just fine.” Moonwhisper snarled as an image of a pegasus stallion floated nearby. To Twilight’s horror, she could see that one of the stallion’s front legs had been torn off, leaving behind a ragged stump. “Quick March was an incredibly promising soldier, fresh out of the officer’s academy. His dream was to one day reach the rank of captain, to serve Equestria the same way his father and grandfather had. Of course, that dream came to an abrupt end when a gargoyle ripped one of his legs off. But, everything’s alright because he didn’t die, isn’t that right? Or, what about Sergeant Mess Deck?” The image of another stallion floated down, this one a unicorn with a hideous gash cutting across both of his eyes. “Mess Deck and his wife were expecting their first foal at the time of the migration. Thanks to the injuries he received he’ll never be able to see his daughter’s face, but he lived so everything’s alright in the end, isn’t it?” By now Moonwhisper was so upset he was visibly shaking. “That’s my real legacy, a suicidal idiot whose stupidity left countless good ponies crippled. A coward who let the monster who tormented his mother get away scot-free because he was too ashamed.” As Moonwhisper continued his rant, weeping openly, the images he had conjured all transformed, taking the form of his mother. “I couldn’t protect her, I was too weak to protect her from him. I wasn’t even able to turn the bastard in because I was afraid of the stigma of being related to somepony like that. What the hay good is a cutie mark for protecting others if I couldn’t even keep my own mother safe?” 
“As horrible as what happened to you was, you can’t allow tragedies like those to define your entire life.” Princess Luna slowly moved closer to Moonwhisper as she tried to calm him down. “I know things must seem impossible for you right now, but you’re stronger than this, I know you are.”
“I’m sick of being strong.” Moonwhisper screamed as he pulled away. “All my life I’ve been the strong one, the stallion everypony else could lean on, and I can’t take it anymore! Haven’t I earned the chance to be weak for a change, to be selfish for once in my damned life?” Seeing Moonwhisper finally break down sobbing was almost more than Twilight could bear. Forgetting that she was incorporeal for a moment Twilight nearly rushed down to embrace Moonwhisper, only to find that the winds that had obliterated the dream-Ponyville had returned, pushing her and Princess Luna away. 
“Surely there must be something in your life that’s worth holding onto?” Princess Luna called out as she struggled against the buffeting winds. “Maybe somepony you care about?”
At first Moonwhisper looked like he wanted to say something in response, but he quickly turned away. “I…there is…no, no it’s not worth wasting my time. It’s just an idiotic fantasy, nothing could ever possibly come of it.” As Moonwhisper muttered to himself, strangely audible to Twilight despite the roaring winds, a shockwave emanated out from him shattering the images of his mother. Strangely, it seemed to Twilight that the fragments that the images broke into almost resembled chess pieces. “Anyway, it’s too late by now.” Moonwhisper’s continued ravings pulled Twilight’s attention away from the mystery of the fragments, which were already melting like bits of ice on a hot summer day. “There’s no point in pretending anything could ever come of it, I’ve just kept pushing her away like I’ve done with everypony else. It’s hopeless, nothing will ever get better, it’s all hopeless…” Moonwhisper continued repeating himself over and over again, interrupted only by the occasional sob. Throughout Moonwhisper’s disjointed ramblings the winds blowing around him steadily increased in intensity, to the point that Twilight could see that Princess Luna was unable to keep herself from being blown back. Meanwhile, the black void of the sky seemed to have somehow developed physical mass and had begun oozing down onto the ground. The tar-like coils of darkness soon curtained Moonwhisper off and Twilight could see thin tendrils of pitch black snaking their way towards him. As the tendrils began to try to wrap themselves around Moonwhisper, Twilight thought she could see faint lavender lights flare up from within the dark. Looking closer as she strained against the wind, Twilight realized that the light seemed to emanate from a glowing symbol that blazed into being whenever one of the tendrils got too close to Moonwhisper to ward them off. However, the tendrils were far too numerous for the light to combat for long, and Moonwhisper was soon almost completely engulfed by the darkness. It was just as the darkness swallowed Moonwhisper’s head that Twilight was finally able to get a clear view of the glowing symbol, which made one final, though futile, effort against the dark before it was extinguished. 
For Twilight, the symbol was arguably the most easily recognizable shape in the world; the starburst of her cutie mark. Before Twilight could fully process the significance of this revelation, however, the force of Moonwhisper’s mental storm finally intensified to the point that it was able to force her out of the dream, forcing her consciousness back into the waking world.

*********

Twilight’s eyes snapped open as she awoke back in her bedroom. While she was still trying to absorb everything she had seen and heard in Moonwhisper’s dream, there were a few things that Twilight was certain of. The first was that Moonwhisper was clearly in far greater pain than Twilight had ever imagined. The second was that, giving by what had overheard at the end Moonwhisper seemed to be suppressing feelings for somepony, and Twilight strongly suspected that that pony was her. And as Twilight sat on her bed and reflected her feelings, she slowly came to the realization that those feelings were mutual.