//------------------------------//
// 3. Steve it off, 1, 2, 3 (and now you can count to 3) 
// Story: Dream On You Crazy Princess 
// by insaneponyauthor 
//------------------------------//

He was certainly a handsome stallion, with his golden mane, especially tied up like that. Him looking at her that way. With interest and attention.

"U—um, this is a dream, right?"

"Uh-yup!" He slipped out of view, as Derpy continued to rotate.

"So uh... Could we like imagine our way out of here?" It seemed strange. Her cognition was all foggy. Was this a dream? She waited for a response.

There was a thump. Then a strange feeling in her stomach. Then a painful knock to her head. Then she watched as a large machete clattered to the ceiling. No floor. Then her legs fell to the floor, unbound. Derpy rolled over and stood up. She felt dizzy, and there was only one of everything. Her uncertain gaze found a standing, smiling Big Macintosh. "Wow! Great thinking!"

Big Mac nodded slightly. "Eyup." His gaze turned to the only door to the metal room.

"So what now?" Asked Derpy.

Macintosh answered with his motion. The hall outside was clear of minions. He spent some time peering down both ends of the dark hall, then headed off.

"What are we looking for?" Derpy wondered aloud as she followed him through the maze of passages. A very confusing maze. "Is Luna in trouble? Like I mean, um, oh, she has to defeat the nightmares. Right?"

"Eyup." They passed through a golden room filled with massive twirling gears and axels and golden wires, strangely abandoned. A periodic thump could be heard.

"Oh, do you think she is in another dream?" further wondered Derpy. She looked up and down and everywhere, scarcely able to take in everything as they hurried through. "So that means we need to get to another dream? So we need to find another dream portal?"

Big Mac stopped fast. Derpy ran into him. She looked around. Greeting her in what looked to be a fashionable passenger room, complete with large glass windows overlooking a swirling orange dreamscape, stood a dozen chimpanzees dual wielding shotguns and behind them three mustache twirling top hat wearing villains, at least one of which was a zebra. They were very fashionable. "Oh, hello there," said Derpy.

The greeting party did not have time to respond, however, as Derpy was pulled sideways into a large, purple, sparking circular vortex.





Desperately, human form Lyra valiantly panicked as human form Elements of Harmony pressed their attack. Bravely, she screamed. She ducked behind a desk to avoid a giant blue diamond shield. Barrel rolled behind another as the space she occupied lit up in candy explosions. A stack of three desks flew over her head. "Psst, over here" came a whispered voice from behind the teacher's desk.

Desperate Lyra didn't care. She vaulted for the teacher's desk, exposing herself to open fire. "Oh no you don't!" Came a hoarse, athletic voice. From behind the desk Luna's horn lit up bright indigo. A rainbow crashed into an invisible wall inches from Lyra as she sailed through the air. A swarm of animals flooded into the room as Lyra landed behind the large desk.

"Under here." Luna indicated toward a small, swirling, arcing, turbulent purple vortex in the footwell of the desk. A bright magenta glow surrounded the entire desk and lifted it to the ceiling. But there was no one under it.





"Where are we?" asked Lyra.

Indeed, it was a good question "I am not sure," spoke Luna. She peered through the darkness. Green vines provided the only illumination to the large space, yet the space was distinctly a dark golden. "It appears to be a cave of some sort. Or perhaps a hive." Luna wondered to herself, how she was to navigate these dreams. It felt like she was forgetting something. Something important.

"What is going on, here?"

Luna turned to look at Lyra, now in pony form. In her eagerness, apprehensiveness, and readiness. "You look like you could be useful." Lyra's expression turned to confusion. "Very well. I shall tell you what I know. Follow me." She hurried off, down a tentacle filled passage. "A nightmarish demon has escaped. A nightmarish demon of nightmare. It is giving everyone nightmares, for a reason I know not. Or have forgotten." Luna paused, in puzzlement. "Regardless," she resumed, "I have first to get to the dream zeppelin, to rescue the wandering eyed one and Macintosh Apple. For they are important for reasons I know not." She paused. "Or--I have forgotten. How strange."

"That makes no sense." Confusion was the word of the day. "Am I dreaming?" Luna took off down another passage suddenly. Lyra could barely keep up.

"Yes. So we search for a dream portal that will take us to the dream zeppelin. It shall be easy to spot. They are all purple and swirly with lightning like effects and they are flat. Even though that makes no sense for interdimensional portals. Then we must defeat the nightmarish nightmare demon through means I know not. Or--" Luna began to knock the side of her head with a hoof. "--Or--"

"Hey, uh, that's all well and good. But what about the giant wasps?"

Luna turned to Lyra, incredulity and confusion warring on her face. "What giant wasps?"

Lyra pointed up and around the particularly large chamber, filled with hundreds of angry giant wasps. "Say," She asked, a puzzled expression overcoming her, "Do you ever get the feeling you are forgetting something?"





"Where are we?" Asked Derpy as she looked over the rim of the volcano, down to the lake of lava below. It was particularly beautiful under the starlit sky. Although the periodic spurts of fountaining lava did not look like fun. She turned to look at Big Mac. He shook his head. "Hmmm." Derpy stood up and looked around. The world was cloaked in darkness, so it was really hard to see anything. "What do we do now?" She wandered around a bit. There certainly were a lot of black rocks all over the place. "Is this a dream?"

Big Mac nodded. "Eyup." He walked up next to her. "Say," Out came Mac's voice in soothing dulcet tones. "Do you ever get the feeling that you are forgetting something?"

Derpy looked at Big Mac in shock, dawning realisation on her face. "Oh..."





Princess Luna turned towards Lyra and spoke, "Quickly, climb onto our back!" 

Lyra turned into a human once more because riding on a giant pony princess is not nearly as awkward for a human being as it would surely have been as a pony. Luna galloped as quickly as she could through the maze of tunnels, unable to fly for the low ceilings and the sheer density of vines, killer wasps, perverse tentacles and sharp hangy-downy-things (known by Princess Twilight Sparkle and other eggheads as "stalactites"). After several intense minutes of fleeing from aforementioned foot-long killer wasps with venomous stingers, fending the vile insects off with an occasional magic blast from Luna and Lyra's broadsword "Josefina," the alicorn princess and the unicorn in human form were cornered in a large, seemingly empty cavern. 

"It's a trap!" Lyra proclaimed uselessly, turning back into a unicorn. 

"Indeed it is," the Princess concurred. The wasps quickly surrounded the pair, forming a horrifying dome which resounded with a constant earsplitting buzz. 

"Luna? If I don't make it out of this, tell Bon Bon...I also ate all the expensive organic hay from Whole Feeds." 

But the swarm did not attack.  Instead, the dome composed of insects from the order Hymenoptera split to admit three lifeforms into its center.  

"Hey, there you guys are!!" To their relief, three smiling faces greeted them. Derpy Hooves, accompanied by Big Macintosh and Fluttershy.

                                ~~~ONE HOUR EARLIER~~~

Derpy and Big Mac made their way down the side of the volcano, not quite knowing what else to do.  They had to tell Princess Luna what they had learned about the true identity of the nightmare demon, but they didn't know how to find her. Purple portals tended to pop up when and where they least expected them, whisking them from one dreamscape to another at random, and even though they had discovered crucial information related to the nightmarish nightmare, they only had bits and pieces of the big picture, and there was very little they could actually do about it on their own.  As they meandered down the mountain, they made small talk, discussing matters such as their jobs, their families, and their hobbies. 

"Wow, Mac! I knew your turkey call was impressive, but I never thought it was supernatural!" 

"Heheh. Nah, I'm just pullin' yer leg. Mah turkey call is as good as it is on account of mah vocal range. Now how I got mah singing talent, on the other hoof...Well, that's a secret." 

"Aw c'mon! I won't tell anypony!" 

"Hmm...How old is Dinky now, anyways?" 

"Trying to change the subject, huh?" Derpy playfully punched Big Mac in the withers. "Well, I'm still not sure how old she is in pony years, but I've been taking care of her for around..."

GROOOOAR!!! Not far away, Macintosh and Derpy spotted what was unmistakably a large, copper-and-blue dragon pursuing a small yellow-and-pink pegasus pony. Said pony was, for some reason, pushing a large boulder up the slope. 

"FLUTTERSHY!!!" the two shouted and galloped/flew to the mare's aid. 

"Fluttershy! Stop stealing Tom and fly away!" Derpy implored. "There's a dragon behind you!" 

"I...can't," the pegasus sobbed. "I just can't! I have to push this boulder up this mountain for all eternity! Every time I make it to the edge of the volcano, the dragon comes and rolls it right back down!" 

"Fluttershy, it's only a dream! Let's just get out of here!" Big Mac appealed. 

"A dream? Well...this is a pretty weird situation to be in for no reason...and I feel like I'm forgetting something important...but..." 

"I'll take care of that sexy hunk of sedimentary rock for you," a new voice offered. It was Pinkie Pie's kooky geologist older sister, Mud Pile or something, appearing from behind a rock with a brave expressionless expression. 

"Maud Pie!" Fluttershy gasped. 

"Pinkie is with Rarity and Applejack, searching for Twilight Sparkle, Spike and Rainbow Dash. You guys try to find Princess Luna, I'll be fine." 

"Well...okay...thank you, Maud. You...be safe now." 

Maud Pie winked, and the three were on their way to meet with Princess Luna and save the day.

                                        ~The Present~

"And then I accidentally fell into this hole, and Fluttershy and Mac followed me, and there were all these bees, but also tentacles and glowing green vines for some reason. But Fluttershy just spoke to them in a kind-yet-authoritative tone and they just backed off and led us here!" Derpy Hooves reported. 

"Well done, Element of Kindness, Wandering Eye-” 

“My name is Derpy,” 

“-Derpy, and Macintosh Apple. We are relieved that you all made it here safely,” Luna replied, grateful for their well-being. “Now, about the nightmarish nightmare demon or demons…” 

"Actually, my minions just led all of you pathetic, powerless foals into a trap," an evil voice informed the party or assorted ponies. The swarm split again, this time revealing the shadowy form of the human incarnation of the Elements of Harmony. "And now I shall reveal to you my evil plan in its entirety." 





Meanwhile, Applejack, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie were totally bucked.

        The Drugs were beginning to wear off.
        At least, they were beginning to wear off for Pinkie Pie and Applejack. Rarity was proving herself to be something of a lightweight. She was slumped against the wall, giggling gently to herself
        “We’re totally bucked,” Applejack muttered to herself. Her head was pounding, and felt like somepony had stuffed it full of cotton.
        “Apples,” Rarity said dreamily.
        “Yeah Rarity, Apples,” Applejack said. She rubbed her head. “How’d you even get it in your head that stuff’d help, Pinkie?” she demanded.
        Pinkie, who was looking bright and chipper in defiance of all social convention, rubbed her chin. “I thought for sure it would work,” she said.
        “How?” Applejack demanded. “We’re still locked up, still got no way to fight that… thing, and all that changed is now I got a headache. And Rarity ain’t exactly gonna help us now.”
        “I can help,” Rarity slurred. “Make a battle dress…”
        Applejack gestured sharply to Rarity, glaring at Pinkie Pie.
        “We’re in a dream, silly!” Pinkie Pie said. “Haven’t you ever had a Lucid Dream before? You can make anything happen if you want it to!”
        “An’ why was that weird leaf necessary?” Applejack asked.
        “Becaaaaause,” Pinkie Pie said, rolling her eyes as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. “The Element of Whatever believes waaaaay stronger than us, because he’s evil and evil things always believe really hard because they don’t have to think about whether or not what they’re doing is right. So we needed help to believe really strongly!”
        Applejack opened her mouth to object. Try as she might, though, she couldn’t find enough logic to refute in Pinkie’s statement. “Well, it didn’t work,” she said finally. “If we were tryin’ to dream up a way outta this Jail Cell, we failed.
        “We weren’t in a jail cell,” Rarity offered.
        Applejack blinked. “What?” she asked.
        “We were in… wooooorld of imagination,” Rarity explained. “All pink… and purple…”
        Applejack sighed and rubbed her head. “Sure, yeah,” she said. 
        “Umm… AJ?” Pinkie asked. She was staring at the floor. Applejack cocked an eyebrow, then looked down as well.
        The floor of the dungeon was shifting colour, from purple, to pink, to green, to orange…
        “To red, to chartreuse, to octarine…” Rarity recounted happily. Each time she did, the floor shifted another colour.
        “Rarity!” Applejack shouted. “You’re doin’ it!”
        “Noooo…” Rarity said. “We’ll do it tonight…”
        Applejack spluttered. Fortunately for her, Pinkie Pie was exactly as obtuse as usual, and was more concerned with her success. “I knew it!” she said, clapping. “I knew that Dreamer’s Tea would work! Rarity can help us get out of here!”
        She knelt down beside Rarity. “Rarity,” she said. “We need you to imagine something.”
        “Mmmkay,” Rarity said. Her already distant eyes became even moreso. For a moment the world sounded like the scent of chocolate and baby oil.
        “Pinkie Pie,” Applejack said. “Don’t turn around.”
        “Why not?” Pinkie asked, turning around.
        Applejack was wearing--well, she was wearing fabric, certainly. There might even have been enough of it to be considered clothing. There were definitely stockings, made from sheer silk and lace, and several strategic swirls of lace across her body. Even her hat was lacey.
        Applejack took off her hat and covered herself with it. “Dangit, Pinkie!” Applejack said.
        “Oh!” Pinkie said, turning sharply back. “Okay, not like that, Rarity.
        “No, I like that,” Rarity said, giggling to herself.”
“I can see why,” Pinkie said, “But we need something… more appropriate for a dungeon.”
        “Rarity, no--” Applejack said, but it was too late. There was another shudder in the world.
Applejack sighed, and Pinkie heard the distinct squeak of leather. This time, she decided not to turn around. “Something for breaking out of a dungeon,” she clarified. “You know… armour, weapons…”
        There was another shudder, and a clank. Pinkie dared to peek, and was greeted by the sight of what could only be described as a chainmail evening dress. And a whip.
        “Fine,” Applejack said. “This’ll do. Can we just… imagine the door open, or somethin’?”
        “Door’s already open,” Rarity said. She looked at Applejack and giggled. “Yur’ pretty,” she said.
        Applejack ignored her. “The door ain’t open!” she said. She trotted over to the door and gave it a healthy buck to demonstrate. The door held firm.
        “Not that one!” Rarity said. “Why would the door to our cell be open? The door is open in the next cell over!”
        “Rarity you’re lucky I ain’t as good at this as you cause I swear to Celestia, I’m imaginin’ wringin’ your neck right now,” Applejack said.
        Rarity simply giggled. “Choke me mommy,” she said.
        “Okay, hold on,” Pinkie said. Applejack, who had apparently forgotten how words worked and was making up for it with a series of furious, but not necessarily objecting, sounds, was in no position to argue, so Pinkie continued. “That’s perfect! All we need to do is imagine a door between our cell and that one! Or weak plaster, or imagine we’re all mice, or imagine we’re lice ON mice though I dunno if I’d wanna do that because I mean, mice are cute but lice aren’t very cute although Fluttershy might disagree because I think she thinks every animal is cute except for dragons but I dunno if she still feels that way--”
        Pinkie Pie’s rambling was interrupted by a crack of thunder and a herald of bees.
        Applejack pressed herself against the door of their cell, craning her neck to look down the hallway. The evil, the devious… thing, who had captured them earlier, in an epic battle that Applejack was reasonably certain she remembered happening, stormed into the dungeon with six ponies in tow: Princess Luna, Big Mac, Derpy, Fluttershy and Lyra.
        “And that,” declared the villain, “Is how I will use the power of ponies dreaming about exactly what I want them to, to resurrect the great demon Steve!”
        “Makes sense,” Big Mac said. “But where does all the bread come into it?”
        “Good question!” The villain declared. “You see--”
        “Steve?” Lyra interrupted. “That’s an odd name for a Demon.
        “Not Steve,” the villain corrected, Steve! The pronunciation is very important. Anyways, the bread is--”
        “But why?” Fluttershy asked. “Why so much suffering?”
        “I dunno,” he said. “Rule Equestria or something, I guess? Look, about the bread--”
        “Why Equestria?” Derpy asked. “It doesn’t seem thematically appropriate.”
        “Enough! Look, I already rule dreams, don’t I?” The villain demanded. “Anyways, it’s no concern of yours! For you shall spend the rest of eternity in my Dream Dungeon!”
        There was a great sweep of wind, and all six ponies were swept into the cell beside Applejack, Rarity and Pinkie Pie. The door slammed shut, and locked tightly. Then it opened again, allowing a swarm of bees to follow after Fluttershy. Then it closed and locked once more.
        The villain cackled in the manner all villains do: Heartily, joyfully and from the belly. Then he moved to the next door and peered inside. “Hello there!” he said to the mares inside. “Enjoying your stay?”
        “Buck you,” Applejack said.
        “Yeeeees,” Rarity giggled.
        “Such language!” The villain said. “You must be more careful--a child could see this dream!” He looked Applejack up and down, and added, “Though I suppose that ship has sailed. Oh well, who am I to tell you not to entertain yourselves for all eternity? You’ll have to excuse me--I have a diabolical plan to complete! Ta ta!”
        Then he left, cackling his way down the halls.
        “Con-sarnit!” Applejack declared, throwing her hat at the floor. She turned back to Rarity and said, “Alright, the door over there is still unlocked, right?”
        Rarity laughed. “No,” she said. “He locked it, silly!”
        Applejack sighed and rubbed her head. “Well,” she said, “Then I hope no foals are seein’ this dream because HOLY FU-”

A gag appeared in Applejack’s mouth before she could finish swearing.

“Now now, Darling,” Rarity giggled. “You shouldn’t blab about what we do alone together.”

“We gon’k goo anyfink awone togeva!” Applejack protested. Rarity’s flirtations were really annoying her by now. It didn’t help that she was using her newly acquired powers over the dream to dress her in increasingly fetish-worthy gear instead of helping them all escape. Of course, the Dreamer Tea had affected her more than others on a mental level as well, so Applejack was trying to give her some leeway.

Applejack ripped the gag from her mouth. She was willing to tolerate the lace hat and chainmail armour that seemed impractical for battle, but she needed to speak at least. “Pinkie,” she said, hoping that the resident expert on Dreamer Tea could help them. “If the villain locked the doors again, and Rarity can’t open them directly, how can she get us all out?” 

“It’s a dream!” Pinkie said, raising her hoof and closing her eyes. “As long as we follow the rules of the dream, we can do anything.” She turned back to face Rarity. “Rarity, could you do us a super-special, awesome favour and find another way out of our cages?” She gave a bounce for every adjective.

Rarity was now draping over her fainting couch which had appeared out of nowhere. “First, dear Applejack must draw me like one of her Fancy mares.” She pointed at the paper and pencil which had appeared at Applejack’s hooves.

“Ooh! Go ahead, Applejack!” said Lyra. “I’ve never seen you draw before!”

“There’s a darned good reason for that!” Applejack grunted. “I ain’t drawin’.”

“If Applejack doesn’t want to,” Fluttershy mumbled as she looked down at her hoof which was fidgeting with the floor, “she shouldn’t have too. I’m sure we can find another way out before the demon is resurrected.”

“Nuh-uh!” Pinkie rapidly shook her head. “Rarity has the lucid dreaming skills from the Dreamer Tea. We have to follow her plan!”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Fine!” She picked up the pencil with her mouth and sketched “-ll=/lo-“ on a piece of paper.

“Ooh! So delightfully minimalist!” said Rarity.

“Oui, Mademoiselle!” said -ll=/lo-.

“Wow! You’re so skilled, Applejack!” said Lyra. She leaned in closer and gave a big grin. “Your drawing talks!”

“Skill ain’t got nothin’ to do with it,” said Applejack as she rolled her eyes again.

 “Indeed,” said Derpy. “The anatomy is incorrect and it shows a lack of perspective and detail. Clearly Rarity is using her lucid dreaming skills to give life to the sketch.”

“ is right,” Luna replied. “The villain is controlling my power and now Rarity is the only one on our side with the ability to control the dream. We need to convince her to get us out of the Dream Dungeon before it’s too late.”


“We need to hang you in a place where you can be better appreciated,” Rarity said to -ll=/lo-. “This dungeon is no place for a work of art like you!”

“Thank you, Mademoiselle!” said -ll=/lo-. “You may call me Sketch Pad. To honour your love for your marefriend would be magnifique!”

“I ain’t her marefriend!” Appejack protested.

“Well, let’s leave then,” said Rarity. She walked through the bars which were now curtains.

The others breathed a sigh of relief as they followed.

“Thank you for getting us out of there, Rarity,” Fluttershy said.

“Eeyup,” Big Mac agreed.

“Let’s get to the summoning chamber before it’s too late!” Luna ordered as she raised a hoof.

Sketch Pad galloped along the wall, while the rest of the group galloped through the corridor.

They soon found the villain dancing around the summoning circle, yelling, “Come to me, Steve!”

“I must admit, that while it’s an unusual name for a demon, Steve is a cool name,” Lyra acknowledged.

“Who said that!” yelled the villain. “I heard you mispronounce his name! It’s Steve!”

Another gale force wind picked up and blew them into the wall, pinning them against it.

“Ah-huh!” said the villain.”I’ll teach you not to mispronounce Steve!”

Rarity giggled and a giant, hoof-held fan appeared and waved, counteracting the gale. “I’m sure that just like I am happy with my Candy Apple, you’ll be happy with your Steve, whatever-your-name-is.”

“You can call me Malicious Star, and his name is Steve!” replied the villain.

“I ain’t your Candy Apple,” Applejack muttered. “Candy Apple’s my cousin.”

“So, it’s sTeVe?” asked Pinkie. “Or is it •❄☜✞☜?”

“No! It’s Steve!” roared Malicious Star.

“Well, you and STEVE can stay here if you want, but leave Equestria out of it!” Applejack demanded.

“Eeyup.” Big Mac nodded. “I ain’t in a hurry to meet steve myself.”

“It’s Steve!” Malicious Star jabbed Big Mac in the chest with his hoof. “And you’re about to meet Steve, whether you like it or not!”

“Even if you succeed in summoning STEVE, we will still defeat you!” Luna declared raising herself to her full height.

“I must admit that I’m eager to see Steve though,” Lyra admitted. “It’s not every day that you meet a demon. It’s very exciting!”

“It’ll be exciting all right,” said Malicious Star. “But his name is Steve!”

“Demons aren’t traditionally beings one would desire to meet or otherwise engage in,” Derpy said. “I doubt that Steve is different.”

“Oh, I desire to meet Steve very much,” said Malicious Star. “And Steve will show you all what happens when you don’t pronounce his name as Steve, which is the correct pronunciation!”

Suddenly, the summoning circle began to glow with an eerie, green light. Cracks appeared in the walls and the corridor was filled with rumbling, the scent of sulphur and oppressive heat. A deep voice began to laugh from what seemed to be every direction at once.

Malicious Star joined in on the laughter, cackling with glee. “You’re too late! Steve is free! Come to me, Steve!”

“Who has summoned me?” the voice replied.

“It is I, Malicious Star, your greatest servant, Steve!” he replied, as he lay prone with his muzzle pressed against the floor.
 
“You have done well, servant!” the voice said. “Now, with my mighty claws, I shall rend the fabric of… where are my claws?”

“I… uh… I am not certain, oh great Steve,” Malicious Star muttered, his face still pressed against the ground. “But your voice is as powerful and dangerous as ever.”

“I do not care about that.” Steve roared. “Having a threatening voice is not helpful in the slightest if I do not have the power to act upon my evil threats! As a matter of fact, this voice is actually starting to give me a headache.” The voice made a growling coughing sound. “That’s better,” it said. It was much quieter, though still oddly threatening. “And honestly, you can just call me ‘Steve’. The whole ‘special pronunciation’ gets old after a while.”

“But Steve…” Malicious Star whined.

“Shut up,” said Steve. “It’s your fault for not summoning me properly in the first place. If I was capable of rending the fabric of reality, we would not be having this discussion.”

“You’re the one who told me how to perform the summoning ritual,” Malicious Star grumbled.

“And you’re the one who performed it improperly. Just look at that sorry excuse for a circle.”

The assembled ponies examined it. Upon not-very-close examination, it was very clearly more of an ellipsoid than a circle.

Luna couldn’t help but snicker.  Steve was, of course, an incredibly dangerous entity, but listening to him squabble made it hard to feel threatened.  “That really is quite a lousy circle. It’s honestly surprising that you managed to summon him at all.”

“Shut up. I drew it fast,” Malicious Star said sullenly.

“So shoddy,” Steve said. “And this isn’t the first time this has happened either.  How humiliating. Summoned without my body.  Ah well, at least I can still do this.”

There was a poof, and Malicious Star was nowhere to be found.

“Uh…” Pinkie stared at the empty space where he had been a moment before. “Where’d he go?”

“Let’s just say I hope he knows how to handle chimeras.” Suddenly Steve was very threatening again. Who knew what other powers he might have?

“Rarity,” Applejack said as she slowly walked backward. “Why don’t you try gettin’ us outta here?”

“Of course, darling,” Rarity answered. Her horn glowed for a moment, then fizzled. “Uh oh.”

“Looks like that Dreamer Tea is wearing off,” Pinkie said matter-of-factly. “She’s probably losing her lucid dreaming powers.”

“Go figure she’d lose her powers now,” Lyra said. “What are we supposed to do?”

“Wait for just a moment,” Steve said menacingly. “Malicious Star isn’t the only one who can summon. I can do it much better than he can. And I do not require a circle.”  His voice went silent, but it was replaced with a rumble like the sounds of thunder, a landslide, and a waterfall all competing to see which could be loudest.  The dream began to shake.

“The time has come for extreme measures!” Luna announced. “Everypony get around me!”

They all obeyed with no hesitation. The dream continued to quake, so hard that it began to blur, as if it were falling apart at the seams.

“Hold tight!” Luna’s horn glowed and exploded with shimmering magic light.  

Everypony opened their eyes, which they had closed against the brightness of the magic. They seemed to be standing the middle of a great valley, with enormous, overly-steep hills of garishly bright colors all around them.  At the peak of each hill was a building. Each one was a different size and shape. 

“Where are we?” Derpy asked.

“Another dream,” Luna answered. 

“That was… disorienting,” Big Macintosh muttered as he stumbled away from the group.

“It was inevitable,” Luna said with a shrug. “That poorly executed summoning spell severely destabilized the dream, making our escape rather rough. Then again, it is that that allowed us to escape at all.”

“Will that Steve thing be able to find us?” Applejack asked.  

“Eventually, but for the time being we should be safe.  He does not know which dream we escaped to. I suppose sooner or later we will have to deal with him. He is too dangerous to leave alone, even if he only has access to part of his power.

Fluttershy nervously poked her head out from behind Luna, where she had been hiding for the whole event. “Whose dream do you think this is?” she asked.

Suddenly a sack of flour with frog legs hopped by, mooed, and continued on.

“I don’t think I wanna know,” Applejack said.

“Oh, I wonder whose dream this could possibly be.” Rarity rolled her eyes.  “I think we all know that a certain draconequus is responsible for this.”

“Actually, that is doubtful,” Luna said. “I wandered into one of his dreams once.” She shuddered. “Needless to say, this is certainly not his. There isn’t nearly enough chocolate milk, for one thing.”

“Then whose dream is this?”

“That is a very good q-” —A gigantic book flew by, followed by a flock of smaller books— “Actually, I think I have a guess.”

“Okay, so we’re probably in Twilight’s dream, then,” Applejack said. “What exactly are we supposed to do about that?”

“Maybe we could try to tell her about that demon thing that Malicious Star summoned.” Lyra suggested. “If she wakes up, she could warn everypony else about him.”

Luna thought for a moment. “That is certainly a possibility.”

“But what if she wakes up while we’re still in her dream?” Derpy asked.

“That… Normally we would simply wake up as well, but the circumstances of these dreams are so unusual that I am not entirely certain. It would be wise to depart from this dream before she awakes.  Which is just as well. It will likely not be long before Steve tracks us here.  The problem will be locating Twilight’s consciousness.  It could be anywhere in this dream.”

“Let’s do it!” Pinkie Pie said, bouncing. “What does that look like anyway?”

“It looks like Twilight,” Luna answered. “Because it is Twilight. I cannot say exactly where she is, but I would guess that if we follow the books, we will find her.”

“Right.” Applejack looked to the sky, noting that there were several dozen flocks of books flying every which way. Occasionally they would dive through the doors and windows of the buildings, libraries obviously, that sat on top of the hills.  “I guess that means we should check out those book nest things then.  Do we split up or stick together?”

“We will split up into groups,” Luna said. “It will take too long to search as one group, but we should not allow ourselves to be caught alone either. Rarity, Applejack, and Fluttershy will be one group, Lyra, Derpy, and Pinkie another. Big Macintosh will go with me.  If any of you should locate Twilight or run into any danger, send up a signal and come back to this location. In the case of an emergency, I will attempt to bring us into another dream as soon as we are all together.”

“Sounds like a plan then,” Applejack said.

“Yeah!” Derpy nodded. “I’m sure that it won’t backfire and result in all of us being separated when something inevitably happens!”

Everyone stared at her.

“What?”

Rarity scratched her head. “So, were you being sarcastic, or…”

“Why would I be sarcastic?”

“Never mind that,” Luna interrupted. “If anyone else has any better ideas, I would love to hear them.”

Everypony was silent. Especially Big Macintosh and Fluttershy.

“I thought so. Now let us get a move on and find Twilight.  If we can communicate with the waking world, this ordeal will become much easier.”

The group reluctantly split and began to ascend their respective hills. Luna really hoped that Derpy hadn’t jinxed everything.  Then again, if something bad was going to happen, it probably would’ve happened anyway.  Something always happened.

She reached the building at the top of the hill that she and Big Macintosh had selected.  It was shaped like an enormous spiral seashell, jutting from the top of the hill like a spike.  The opening of the shell formed an arched entryway. She looked back just long enough to watch the other groups reach their destinations.  She hoped that she’d see them again soon.

Behind her she heard Big Macintosh gasp.

“What is it?”

“It’s… really big in here.”

“Huh?” Luna turned around and groaned as she saw that the building was far larger inside than outside. The entrance hall alone was large enough to fit the entirety of the building inside it, and there were at least half a dozen doorways leading into other areas that were presumably of similar size. “Naturally.”

        The main hall of the library was an enormous cone shape, as if it had been built inside an enormous sea shell. A staircase curved in a vast spiral around the room, following the ridges of the shell. There were at least half a dozen floors before the staircase curved out of sight. As the two ponies walked across the floor, books that had been sitting on the floor flapped their pages and flew to safety.

        Luna turned to Big Mac. "Well, we better get started searching. The sooner we find Twilight, the sooner we can get out of here. I'll start at the top since I can fly, while you start on the ground floor and work your way up."

        "Nooope"

        "What?! How dare you question my leadership? This is clearly the best plan. I don't see you offering any suggestions, Mr. Smarty Pants!"

        "Sssssh. The quieter you become, the