"For the love of all that is Holy leave me alone!" I yelled as I ran down the hall in the castle being chased by none other than Twilight the living encyclopedia Sparkle.
Can somepony tell me where this mare puts all that information she gets? Seriously, her brain must fill up her entire body from her cute face and head down to her sexy flank. Wait, what did I just say? Oh, this is just perfect I've been here for over a month and I'm starting to think these ponies are attractive. Well, to be honest not all of them just a select few. Twilight, Luna, Fluttershy, Derpy Hooves, and a thestral guard named Star Light are the only ones that I think have a nice flank among other things. There is some good news you see after I accepted the fact about me and bearded are one and the same I was able to take off the hat and cape. Yay me.
The only thing was without them I was just plain old Alex. Put them on and I'm Alexander Star Swirl it's me but with all the bearded jerk's knowledge. But like I said, I'm running for my life not because Twilight wants to know more about Star Swirl no she wants to learn all about humans. Let me tell you something five hours of nothing but questions would cause anypony to run screaming for the hills.
"Alex why are you running I just want to ask you a few more questions," Twilight yelled as she chases after me.
"Five hours is not a few questions it's torture and I'm sure it's against the Geneva convention," I yelled back as I increased my speed.
After a few moments, I don't hear her behind me anymore and I think I'm home free. That is until I turn a corner and low and behold there standing before me is the lavender nightmare with a smug look on her muzzle.
"How did you get, you teleported didn't you?" I said looking at her as she nodded her head.
Feeling defeated I was just about to give in when I came up with a great idea.
"You know what screw it if you want to ask me a question fine but you have to do something for me," I said as an evil smirk moved across my muzzle.
"Oh really that's wonderful and very kind of you but what could you want from me?"She said looking a little confused and fearful from my expression.
" It's nothing too hard for me to answer more of your questions, You just have to show me your plot," I said retaining a smile on my face.
WHAT!!! She screamed.
"You heard me show the plot or no questions," I said still with a smile.
"But but that's just-just so perverted how can you ask me that?" She said with a very noticeable blush.
"Simple I'm a guy and guys like booty," I said in my best Bill Clinton voice.
Twilight closed her eyes as she lifted her tail so Alex could have a view of her most private and embarrassing parts. She waits with tears starting to form in her tightly closed eyes.
"Wow, they're not purple." Sniff sniff "But they smell like lavender, I wonder what they taste like?"
Hearing that Twilight opened her eyes in shock turning her head to yell behind her she was about to speak when she didn't see anypony there. Looking around she finally saw Alex ten feet ahead of her sitting on his flank looking at a vase full of green flowers.
If anypony were to look at her they would see her left eye twitching and her mane and tail moving in a nonexistent breeze. And if said pony were smart they would recognize when the normally logical and collective young alicorn begins to RAGE SHIFT they would run for the hills.
3000 years ATA (After Twilight's Ascension)
"And as we continue our tour Mares and Stallions. We come upon one of the most bizarre sites. As you can see the legend of the foalish stallion and the vengeful Princess is true." The tour guide says.
As ponies look upon a sight.
There on the wall is a shadow of a pony looking as if they are screaming in pain burned in a place like those of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
Back to present
In the medical wing of the castle a figure lays on a bed wrapped in so many bandages he resembled a mummy of old. Sitting around the poor soul were three alicorns each with a different expression. As for the injured pony between the moans of pain and the inaudible words, all focused at a certain purple princess. There wasn't much of a conversation going on in the room.
"Now look Twilight said she was sorry so think it would be best if we just put this little incident behind us and try to move on," Celestia said in that motherly tone of hers.
Looking at her with my one good eye being that the other is bandaged over I had only one thing to say." Muph moo Mummut." (Buck you Sunbutt)
"There you see Alex has already forgiven you. Now let us leave so he may rest and recover." Luna says as she watches the others leave before she leans down to whisper in my ear. "If you would have asked I would have shown you mine." She said as she turned to leave swinging her tail side to side giving me a clear view of her naughty bits.
After she left the only thought that came to me was, Damn sexy Luna.
With nothing else to do, I decided to just lay there and think. Maybe if I focused hard enough I could figure out some way to get home. Closing my eyes I began to calmly breathe in and out.
After what felt like forever I finally opened my eyes and found myself in a void of white. Looking around I smiled knowing that this was the place where all thought originated the subconscious the astral plan.
Yes Yes I'm very proud you finally got here now we can talk.
Who's that? Great just great I access my subconscious and there's already someone here that's just perfect.
I'm not someone I'm you, well your Id actually.
Wait I thought the Id was the primitive part of the mind?
That's true for a human but for ponies it is where the true intellectual part of the mind resides.
".."
Just trust me. Now I know you have a lot of questions, but I would like to know one thing?
WHY FOR THE LOVE OF FAUST DO I HAVE TO LOOK AT THESE THREE IMAGES EVERY DAY YOU PERVERT?!!
Hey who are you calling pervert, I just so happen to be a normal guy with a healthy libido and strong imagination.
Yeah anyways we're getting off-topic. As I was going to say congratulations for reaching here. I know you have a lot of questions but scene this your first time here you won't be able to stay for long.
What do you mean I can't stay long?
Don't interrupt it's rude. Like I said I will answer your questions First don't even bother with Fluttershy, Derpy, and Star Light you won't get any were with them.
Oh yeah, why not?
Simple Flutters X Discord, Derpy X Time-Turner, and Star Light Requested to be transferred to Manehatten.
Whoa, thanks for the heads up you know you could learn a little thing called tact. Jerk
I'm sorry but I told you there's only a small amount of time remember.
Fine, what else can you tell me?
Alright second thing is you really don't need the hat and cape to access Star Swirl's memories you have all of the knowledge the hat and cape are just that a hat and cape.
Okay then what's the third thing?
This is the most important thing you should know. Stop dreaming about the Princesses and just ask them out for buck sake. You already have two of them that really like you (Luna and Twilight) so just ask all of them out. You never know you might get lucky and start a herd with three alicorns.
Wait a minute what do you mean a herd?
Seriously have you not noticed the ratio of mares to stallions it's like five to one. Although herding isn't practiced that much there is still a chance with those three. And you got to admit. If you weren't thinking about it then these images wouldn't be here.
Okay, I'll admit it but how do you know that it'll work out you know with them.
I don't I just have faith and you're about to come out of this so if I don't see you for a while. Just remember your not alone.
I watch as the white void starts to fade away. Seconds later I sat up in the bed and looked around. Then three things came to mind.
First I was no longer in pain.
Second I didn't look like a mummy anymore.
And finally Celestia, Luna, and Twilight were sitting around me with blushing and smiling faces.
"Okay, I have a few questions to ask you three," I said gaining their attention.
"First why don't I look like the mummy anymore?
Second how long have you three been here?
And third what's with the blushy - smiley faces?"
Twilight spoke first. "It appears you were able to cast a healing spell on yourself which is an amazing scene alicorns can't even do that ."
"Hooray for me I'm special, and my other two questions?" I said sarcastically making Twilight roll her eyes and smile.
"As for the time we have been here, we arrived moments after you entered that meditated state I would have to say forty-eight hours," Celestia said causing me to turn in her direction.
Turning to look at Luna this time I waited for her answer. "Yes, I believe it is my turn to answer."
Making me shake my head yes.
"You see the reason we have theses you put it blushy - smiley faces is because we heard everything and I mean everything . You tend to talk a lot when you're meditating."Luna said gaining more crimson on her cheeks.
After hearing all of this I just got off the bed and made my way out the door.
"Alex are you alright, where are you going ?" Twilight asked very concerned about me.
"Oh yeah I'm fine really I'm just going to go to the bar and have one drink then I'll be back," I said as I made my way out of the room and down the hall.
After I was gone Luna looked to the others breathing in a heavy sigh." Sister, should we have not told him everything."
I don't think that is a good idea for now let us wait for the test to come back before we say anything. Celestia said looking from her sister to Twilight.
"Wait did he say he was going out to drink?"Luna said with a bit of fear in her voice as she made her way to the door.
"Yes why wou... Oh no, all that's left in the city are very mares looking for a good stallion to rut. Celestia said realizing the danger their Alex was in.
"We have to find him before it's too late!!" Twilight yelled as she ran out of the room activating a spell.
" What did you just do Twilight?" Tai called to her former student as she also started to run down the halls.
"Tracking spell We'll find him in no time!"Twilight yelled back." I got him so let's go save our stallion!" She called as she teleported the others following her actions.
Twenty- four hours ago
"This is horrible it can't be happening. How could we have forgotten of our estrus cycle?"Celestia said no one as she paced back and forth.
"Sister calm down we can handle it we've done it before now I'm just worried about young Twilight this is her first estrus as an alicorn and we both know how hard it can be," Luna said placing a wing over her sister to reassure her.
"By the way where is Twilight?" Celestia asked before she had a fearful expression.
Both she and Luna took off running for the medical wing hoping that the young alicorn wasn't doing what they both were thinking. Bursting through the doors they both stopped to see Twilight just sitting there listening. Turning to look at them Twi brought her hoof to her lips to hush them.
"Come here you got to hear this." She said waving to them.
Walking over and sitting down the three listened to the one-sided conversation all of them blushing at what was being said.
Alex's internal conversation with himself.
What do you mean how do I feel about them?
Fine, they're beautiful okay is that what you want to hear.
And maybe I really like them a lot.
Why? What do you mean why?
Well, Tai's kind and she listens to you without judging you.
Luna tells you like it is and she doesn't hold anything back.
Twilight she's just so adorkable especially when she smiles.
Choose one how can I do that? That's like asking me to choose to have my hands or feet cut off I just couldn't do it.
A what? A herd what's that?
You mean I can ask if all of them would stay with me? But what if they say no or just laugh at me.
Yeah, your right it doesn't hurt to ask.
Can I tell you something that's kind of a secret?
You see back when I was on earth I always said that I hated kids but I didn't. I was just jealous that my brothers and sisters found someone a had a family. And I was stuck all alone.
What was that?
How many?
Oh, I always wanted a big family you know six to ten kids. And no I don't care about all boys or girls it wouldn't matter they'd be my kids.
I don't know why I'm even talking about this It's not like they have those kinds of feelings for me anyway.
Well see you around Star Swirl and again sorry about all that stuff I said you're actually a pretty nice guy to talk to a little pushy but still.
Back in the conscious world AKA the medical wing
After hearing all of that the three alicorns sat there with tears in their eyes and crimson on their cheeks.
"What do we do?" Twilight said breaking the silence.
Celestia shook her head then she got up and moved over to the bed. Leaning down she gently kissed Alex on the lips. "The answer is yes my dear Alex, I will join your herd and I will love to bare your foals as many as you'd like." She said stepping away with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face.
Seeing this both Luna and Twilight did and said the same thing.
After it was over Twilight began to giggle.
" What is the matter, my former student?" Tai said with a raised brow.
Looking at her mentor Twilight blush more. "You see that was, well that was my first kiss."
At that moment the three began to giggle before putting their hooves over their muzzles to quiet themselves.
"So what do we do now sister?" Luna asked in a hushed tone.
"First we activate the spell to take care of our estrus then we wait until Alex decides when he is ready to start a herd with us," Celestia said looking from her sister to Twilight.
Activating the spell their horns glowed for a few minutes before they finally subsided.
"Now what?" Luna said looking a little bored.
"Well, we could go and get tested to see if we are able to conceive a foal with Alex," Twilight said perking up the other two alicorns.
"That is a wonderful idea I believe Doctor Lovebird is on call right now," Celestia said gesturing the others to follow her out of the room to find the doctor.
Back to present time at a bar just outside the castle.
Alex was sitting at the bar nursing his drink when a group of five mares made their way over to him.
"Well well look what we have here girls alone stallion out and about during heat season."
Turning around Alex came muzzle to muzzle with Upper Crust. Man did Alex really hate this mare I mean he hated her so much he wished she would come down with an Eternal yeast infection. That's how much he hated her.
But Alex decided to be a little civil. "What do you want Upper Crud?" He said remembering how she treated him his first week here.
"Oh, how sweet you're still mad about that day," Upper said with an I'm better than you attitude. Quite simple There are two ways this is going to turn out. A. you come quietly and state our heat cycles or B. kicking and screaming, either way, your ours until we're done with you." She said poking a hoof in his chest.
Looking past the group of mares Alex began to smile clearing his throat he looked Upper Crust in the eyes. "Actually you five have a slight problem with that idea."
"Oh Yeah and what could that be Stud," Upper said getting annoyed.
" That's simple them," Alex said raising his hoof pointing behind the mares.
With that, all five mares turn around to see three very pissed-off alicorn princesses.
"Pri Princess Celestia Princess Luna Princess Twilight what are you three doing here?"Upper said as she and the others bowed to the royalty.
Celestia's expression changed from stern to loving with a bit of a devilish grin. "That is quite simple my little pony we are here to retrieve Alex. Celestia said still holding that grin.
"After all what kind of herd would we be if we did not protect our stallion from other mares especially during estrus." Luna and Twilight said in unison.
Hearing this all five lust-filled mares fainted immediately.
Seeing that it was safe to move Alex got off the barstool and made his way over to the princesses mouthing the words thank you to them.
"Now I got a few things to say about this herd deal," Alex said looking at the mares in front of him. First off I am and will always be a pain in the plot, and second I want a big family that means no less than twelve foals."
"We already figured that you will never change who you are and we excepted that. Luna said grinning devilishly.
"But the part about a big family we were thinking more along the lines of fifteen foals," Twilight said having the same devilish grin as the other two.
Yes, That sounds lovely but I think it would be best if we return to the castle to prepare a statement for the public and those pesky nobles. Celestia said as she turned to leave.
"Statement what statement?" I asked looking a little confused.
"Why the four of us forming a herd and the soon-to-be a wedding for us," Luna said as she too turned to leave.
"Now come on Alex the sooner we get back to the castle the sooner we can start on that big family you always wanted," Twilight said in a seductive tone turning to leave with the others.
As the three mares walk back to the castle Alex noticed how they were swinging their hips sexy like and their tails moving just enough so he could see their naughty bits. Stopping for a moment Alex thought to himself.
You know this ain't so bad it could be worse I could have come here as Flash Sentry.