You remember reading about something called ‘Smiling Depression’.
It was about ponies who had depression, but didn’t look, act or even admit it. They just smiled and acted like any pony does. You honestly didn’t know how that could happen to anypony, but as you made the walk to the Ponyville Library, you could now.
“Morning Flare!” Some random mare says as you pass on by.
“Morning!” You say with an equally cheery smile to match her own.
“How’s it hanging?” A stallion asks.
“Oh, down low and to the right, last time I checked.”
The stallion guffaws and laughs himself silly. You didn’t think it was that funny or clever, but the sight alone makes you let out a chuckle of your own.
But really, you’re feeling lower than you’ve ever felt.
Ditzy’s a good mare. A good mare who deserves ponies to tell her what’s wrong and tell her the truth. Instead I’m lying and hiding. You think, swallowing dryly. I’m a horrible pony.
Your dreams weren’t the best last night. That promise Ditzy made you make last night has been gnawing at your innards and making you feel worse and worse with each passing moment.
With a small sigh, you take a step into the Golden Oaks Library and shut the door behind you. Twilight looks up from her newspaper and gives you a small smile.
“Well good morning Flare. How can I help you?” She asks nonchalantly. She still had to work on her poker face.
“Got that present for me yet?” You ask idly. “Was in the neighbourhood and thought I’d check in.”
That was a lie. You went out of your way here. You’re nervous as hell and half expecting the cat to be let out of the bag at any second. Ditzy’s smart.
Twilight sighs and shakes her head. “No, not yet. I’ll either have your present ready tonight or tomorrow morning. I still have to do the finishing touches.”
‘Finishing touches’ you’ve come to realize after these meetings means that the amnestic is still sublimating, which you only learned after asking Twilight and getting a half an hour lecture.
You give her a small nod. “Alright Twilight. You take care, okay?”
You start to make your way out the door, but stop in the doorway.
“Are you okay?” She asks with genial concern. “You seem... down.”
“Down?” You ask with a laugh. “Twilight, I’m fine. Stressed a bit, having trouble sleeping that’s about it. Worry about you, alright? I’m fine, really.”
Twilight gives you a look, but relents. “Alright... But if there is anything you want to talk about, I’m here for you. I’m your friend, after all.”
There comes a time in life when somepony, somewhere says something that carries the weight of a strong buck to the gut. And this was it.
A friend. She considers you a friend. Just like Ditzy considers you a friend. Yet you can’t tell her the straight truth. Even more so with Ditzy and she wants to take it a step further. That’s how much she trusts you and cares for you. And what are you doing?
You force yourself to smile and nod. “Don’t worry Twilight,” you manage to say. “I’m fine.”
She tries to say something, but you’re already out the door.
Getting out into the streets of Ponyville, you slink back to the Post Office, feeling lower than dirt the entire way there.
Nopony else is there. Ditzy is still on her route, Raindrops is done for the day and Thunderlane finished early.
Closing the office door behind you, you reach into your desk.
“Sometimes I hate my vices...” You mumble as you pull out a pack of cigarettes. You had one last night and promised yourself that it would be the only one. But you had another this morning and now that it’s past lunch, you’re on your third cigarette of the day.
Settling into bad habits, you hold the cigarette between your lips, light it and take a much needed drag. The minute the nicotine hits your system, you feel all your weights and all your worries just melt away with the smoke.
“Flare, we need to talk abo...out... Are you smoking?”
You look up and see Ditzy standing in the doorway with a look on her face that seemed to be a mix of anger and disappointment. “Well?”
You look to your cigarette and then to her before shrugging slowly.
“...No, see I’m burning this new kind of incense and-”
“Flare.”
“What the hell do you want me to say? ‘Yes’? It’s obvious, so why are you asking?”
“I just can’t believe you’re smoking,” Ditzy says, shutting the door behind her. “Smoking kills.”
“So do chainsaws, but we still sell them in the gardening section,” you bite back. “Besides, it’s not a constant thing.”
“There’s a reason why the royal guard call them ‘coffin nails’,” she says with glare.
Yeah, there IS a reason why they call them that. Me.
With another sigh, you let loose a puff of smoke out the window. “Only need it when I gotta steady my nerves.”
You inwardly flinch at your own words, knowing you just opened a new can of worms.
“And why do you need to ‘steady your nerves’?” She asks accusingly. “Are you finally realizing just how dangerous this is gonna be for you if I’m right?”
With a sigh, you snub out your cigarette and tuck it behind your ear. “No, I’m just realizing that Rosewing thinks this is a date and I have to play the part and have been out of the dating scene for years.” You say with a shrug. “And yes, there is the off chance she might be something a hell of a lot more dangerous.”
At least I’m not lying about that first part... You think.
“What’s got you so upset anyway?”
“I don’t like smoke, alright?” She says flatly. “Now, we got a bit of a problem. That ‘date’ you and Rosewing are going on? It’s going to be at around 6, right?”
You nod. “Yeah. And?”
“I can’t hide as easily in the area. It won’t be dark until 8.”
You let out a small sigh. “Well, can’t you just sit on a bench and read like I was?”
“You weren’t as well known as you were before. I’ll turn heads if they see me sitting on a park bench and reading a paper.” She says with a sigh. “I’ve got a reputation.”
“Cloud?”
“None. Weather team cleared them all for sunny weather tomorrow. Be more obvious than subtle.”
You grind your teeth in frustration. “Well... What do we do? If you are right, it’d take longer for backup.”
“...I don’t know,” Ditzy sighs in frustration. “Nothing going on. No movies playing. No parties. Nothing is happening nearby.”
You shake your head and get to your hooves. “Then I’ll be by myself and you’ll be at the Post Office,” you say finally. “It’s closer than your house and you can just make the excuse that you have to go in to take care of a special order or something.”
Ditzy just looks at you shocked. “If something happens, I’ll still be 5 minutes out. A lot can happen in 5 minutes.”
You nod slowly. “That’s why we hope and pray for the best,” you say. “Movie night with Rosewing starts in 3 hours. If you can find anything better by then, great. If not? It’s our best shot.”
It looks like Ditzy is trying to find some out, something she hasn’t thought of, but she finally relents and lets out a long sigh. “Fine. But if that is what we’re doing, we’re getting you ready for date-night.” She says. Without a moment’s hesitation, she snatches the cigarette from behind your ear and crushes it under her hoof.
You open your mouth to protest, but she shoots you a deathly glare.
“If I catch you smoking again, I’ll make you eat it next time. Got it?” She growls. “And that’s not a threat, that’s a promise.”
You slowly close your mouth and put your hooves up. “Alright. You got me. You won’t catch me smoking.”
Ditzy gives you a hard look, but it slowly melts. “Colonel, please. I bet there are some ponies out there who’d like to see you live a long and happy life without coughing up a lung.”
You suppress a flinch at ‘long and happy’ and sigh.
If you only knew Ditzy. What would you say? Would you care I’m almost 4 times your age? Would you care if I smoked if I told you I’m dying in two years? You give her a soft smile. If you only knew.
“Alright. Alright, I won’t smoke. I promise. Now, I gotta get ready. Still need to shower, shave and shi-”
“Actually Colonel, I need you to come to my house first. I have some things for you,” She says. “I doubt you actually have any clothes that work for this occasion and I have something. Consider it an insurance policy.”
Thinking it over, Ditzy is right. You didn’t exactly pack any good clothes for this endeavor, mostly work clothes. And you can’t wear your tuxedo that Rarity made, that’d be over dressing. You give Ditzy a shrug and get to your hooves. “Alright then, lead on.”
****************************
It feels odd to be in Ditzy’s bedroom again. The last time you were here, she stripped your clothes off and held you while she slept.
The memory of her holding you comes rushing back and you suppress a blush as you sit down on the bed.
“So,” you say, clearing your throat. “What’chya got stashed away? Some sort of fancy spy watch that shoots grappling hooks?”
“It’s under the bed, just give me a moment. I’m trying to find a shirt that will work...”
Leaning down, you grope a hoof under the bed, looking for whatever ‘it’ was. “So you do got something I can wear?”
“Yes,” Ditzy answers softly. “They were Giggles’. A lot of them he didn’t wear. It wasn’t his style. I’m looking for something with longer sleeves that can easily hide it and I know I bought something like that.”
You feel your graze against something and feel a box. “Huh, is this the ‘it’ that you keep referring to?” You ask as you pull it out. It looked like just a standard cardboard box, taped shut.
Ditzy turns around and her whole face goes white as she sees you handle it. “Put that down put that down!” She screams. Ditzy practically tackles you and wrenches the box out of your hooves.
“Whoa, sorry there! I didn’t mean to-”
“It’s fine, it’s fine.” She says, her voice cracking. “Personal things. Personal things, that’s all. Just leave it at that. Personal.”
Ditzy shoots you a glance and you see her whole face was burning red. Putting two and two together, you clear your throat. “Oh. Uh, sorry.”
When did my life become a romantic comedy? You ask yourself with a grumble.
“I’ll find the shirt next. If you’re going to keep your hooves to yourself, I need to stop you from being so curious,” she says as she puts the box back. Your watch her dip underneath the bed and pull out another box, this one more important. Made of steel and locked, you can’t help but ask.
“What do you need the lock for?”
Pulling out a key from the nightstand, Ditzy silently unlocks the box and opens it towards you.
“Because all weapons should be kept safe and locked away from curious children,” she says.
The whole thing looks like a metal bracer, but there’s more to it. On the top of it is a metal barrel, connected to a manner of fine and intricate machinery.
“What the hell is this?” You ask breathlessly.
“Minotaur engineering. Griffon tech. Pony design. Commissioned by her majesty, Celestia herself. The original itself was used in the attempted assassination King Sombra shortly after his rise to power. It failed, but the design remained. There are five of these in existence. Three are currently in the royal war room, the original in the Princess’s private vault and the fifth was built on commision for me as a favor,” she says with a growing smile. “Colonel, I’d like to introduce you to the hoof-cannon. A wrist mounted cannon capable of great damage at close to short range. A skilled shot can even use it at 30 yards.”
You’ve heard and seen a lot of things while serving Celestia, but this? This was new.
Wordlessly, she starts strapping it to your hoof. “The only problem is you have one shot, so you have to make it count. Reloading this thing takes 5 minutes and you can’t do it while wearing it. It’s the reason why they’re not more common in the guard today, beside the fact we haven’t been at war for years. Technically, it’s impractical for combat.”
“Then why are you giving it to me?” You ask with a raised eyebrow.
With a long sigh, Ditzy finishes securing the last strap. “I’m a paranoid mare who likes to have all her bases covered. And I said ‘technically’. If the changeling gets the drop on you, it’ll prove hard to use. If you’re face to face, you can potentially end the fight in a single motion.”
Grabbing your hoof with both of her, she holds your foreleg out in front of you. “It was designed for freedom of movement. It won’t trigger unless you want it to. Simply snap your wrist downwards hard-”
She does that just and you hear a loud click.
“And it’ll fire. Got all that?”
You nod dumbly. “Yeah, yeah... I think I got it,” you say quietly. “You’re really scared, aren’t you?”
Ditzy purses her lips. “I’ve got a bad feeling. I know it’s silly. But when nothing happens and you come back, I’ll just be a big worry-wart.”
“No, no...” You say, shaking your head. “Bad feelings are alright. Bad feelings mean you care. I appreciate it.” Giving your foreleg a few flexes, you smile. “And if nothing happens, we can all laugh about this later and I can call you a silly pony for worrying.”
Ditzy lets out a little giggle. “Silly pony?”
“Yeah. A silly pony who gets worried over silly things,” you say with a smile. “But thank you. Now, I really do need a shirt of some kind, this thing isn’t exactly well hidden.”
With a click of her teeth, Ditzy returns to her closet and rummages through it before pulling out a simple button up red flannel shirt.
“How’s this one?”
“Lumberjack. It works.” Taking it from her, you start to slip it on. “Even fits right.”
With a deep breath, you get to your hooves. “I’ll have my mouth and ears on before I show up to Rosewing’s door. You should be able to hear anything I can. Safeword sound alright?”
“Look at you getting all professional now,” Ditzy says with a smile. “How does ‘Evergreen’ sound?”
“Like a word I won’t use tonight unless need be,” you smile back. “In all seriousness though, I have to get going. Need to take a shower and get myself looking pretty.”
As you make your way for the door, you feel a hoof on your shoulder.
“Colonel... Please. B-”
“Be careful, I know mom I know. I’ll be home by midnight I promise.”
With another little laugh, Ditzy slowly lets go. “You better.”
****************************
You had to admit, you did clean up good.
A couple mints to get the smell of smoke off your breath, a good brush through your mane and a little confidence make you feel on top of the world.
Raising a hoof, you bring it down on Rosewing’s door sharply.
All is silent for a few moments, but you can just make out her voice through the door. “Coming!”
Slowly, the door opens and Roseing gives you a big smile. “Flare! Thank you so much for coming. Make yourself at home! I’m getting the TV set up in the living room and got the popcorn maker going right now!”
You wipe your hooves off and walk right in with a calm and collected smile.
Rosewing’s house wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, just like before.
The TV sat against one of the walls against the couch, a couple of blankets were laid out on the floor and you could hear the sound of popping popcorn in the kitchen.
If she was a changeling, she hid it very well.
“So Rose, what’s on tonight? Anything good?” You ask as you plop yourself down on the couch.
No matter how many times you saw one, TV’s still managed to impress you. You remember growing up and the radio being the big thing.
They’re not that common in areas outside Canterlot and Manehattan, but they’ve taken off these past decades.
“There’s a showing tonight for Curse of the Faceless Horse. The newspaper said the movie’s supposed to be about a petrified pony body from some sort of volcano eruption a long time ago and every scientist left alone with it ends up dead.”
“Now that sounds like an interesting movie, I...” You stop short as Rosewing joins you on the couch, just a little too close than what’s usually socially acceptable. You wouldn’t really mind if she wasn’t inching closer.
“So, uh, Rosewing... why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself?” Smooth as sandpaper. “We really haven’t talked that much, besides when I’d stop by your stall. Why invite me of all ponies?”
Rosewing shrugs. “I like you.”
That makes your heart skip a beat.
“What?”
“I like you. You’re cool, friendly and just seem like a good pony. I wanted to be your friend.”
Well that’s... “I... really don’t know what to make of that,” you say with a little laugh. “I’m flattered, though.”
Rosewing lets out a little laugh and inches closer. “As for me, well... I like gardening. I sell all sorts of flowers. I really do like roses. Fits the name,” she giggles. “I know you like lilacs. So what about you? What do you like to do for fun?”
You let out a long sigh and really think about the question. “What do I like to do for fun?” you ask yourself. “Well, I...”
You pause and start to sit up and sniff at the air. “Is that smoke?”
Right on cue, the smoke detector kicks off and your eyes dart to the kitchen. A billow of smoke and flames lick from the popcorn maker.
You hear Rosewing let out a startled cry and you’re off like a shot. You rip the plug out of the wall and run it out the side door and into an empty flowerbed. “It’s fine! It’s fine!” you yell back in, kicking some dirt onto it. “I mean, the popcorn maker is probably toast but the fire’s out!”
“Ohh no!” Rosewing moans. “I’m so sorry! I should have been watching it, but we got to talking and-”
“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay, it’s fine. No harm, no foul. I mean, we’re not going to have popcorn for the movie...”
Rosewing’s face sinks a little further and her ears splay back. “B...But...” For a moment, you think she’s about to cry until she perks right up. “I’m gonna run to the store!”
She’s already bolting for the door by the time you get the words out. “What? What for?”
“I’m gonna pick up some more popcorn, but without that stupid auto maker! Worst 30 bits I ever spent! Gonna make it the old fashioned way!” She says as she throws on a jacket. “I’ll be right back! Just relax, I’ll be like 5 minutes!”
You open your mouth to protest, but by the time you do, Rosewing is gone.
“That could have gone a lot worse...” You hear Ditzy say over the radio. “You alright?”
“Yeah, yeah I’m fine...” You say with a nod. Plopping yourself down on the couch, you hear the floor move and settle beneath your hooves. “Huh...”
“What?”
“Nothing. Sounds like Rosewing’s floor is giving out.” You say idly as you flip on the TV. “I felt it sag a bit when I sit. She’s gonna need a brace.”
“What? That’s impossible.”
“No it isn’t. I mean, my old house had an old floor and would do the same thing. Sag a bit into the basement and creak when weight shifted.”
“Colonel, I’m telling you that’s impossible.”
Sighing, you give the floor a little kick and hear the hollow thud from below and feel it move.
“Her basement just needs a couple jacks, I’ll tell her-”
“COLONEL, THAT HOUSE DOESN’T HAVE A BASEMENT!”
It finally hits you and you start to slowly get up. “...What?”
“I’ve seen the house plans, I spent hours looking over them before we made our first entry. She does NOT have a basement. She can’t.” Ditzy says firmly. “It would make her house structurally unsound.”
You feel your mouth go dry as the reality of it all starts to set in. “Well, uh... There always could be another explanation,” you say, pacing the floor. “She could be a drug dealer and the lab is underneath us.”
“Start looking for some entryway. There’s gotta be-”
“A closet. It has to be a closet. No one would expect it. No reason to go in there.” You start to ramble. “Where I’d put the entrance to my secret drug lab.”
Looking around, you find the closet on the far wall and sprint towards it. Just as you thought, the door is locked.
“Who locks a closet when they live alone?” You ask no pony in particular.
“Can you pick it?”
“No.” You say, backing up a few solid feet.
“I’ll be there, just-”
With a mighty sprint, you throw yourself at the side of the closet.
If this is nothing, I’m gonna look like one big idiot. You think as the door moves with you.
“Colonel, she’ll know something’s wrong!”
“Not immediately. Opens inward. Gives me time. Which I don’t have a lot of.”
Tearing through the closet, you look for something, anything to confirm your suspicions.
Nothing.
Going for broke, you tear up the carpet underneath and that’s when you hit paydirt. A piece of plywood covers part of the floor and ripping that off too exposes a massive hole into the underneath of the house.
“Ditzy, I found a hole in the closet. I got like, 3 minutes or something. Start getting here, I’m gonna check this out.”
You hear her say something, but you don’t hear it as you jump down the hole.
“Please be a drug lab...” You think. Hitting the bottom, you see the tunnel widen out and an eerie green glow come from the end of it.
You never liked enclosed areas and this whole place was triggering some deep seated claustrophobia. But steeling your nerves, you press onwards and round your head around the corner.
“Definitely not a drug lab,” you murmur in wide eyed shock. “Ditzy, get here now.”
The room itself was large and looking to the ceiling in the dim green light you could easily see some floorboards shining through the dirt.
But what gave you the chills was the source of the glow.
“How bad is it?”
A pony you could only guess to be the original Rosewing sat in a green cocoon stuck to one of the walls. Her form was emaciated, like she hadn’t eaten in weeks. “We’re gonna need the EMT’s...” You say breathlessly. “A lot of EMT’s.”
Rosewing wasn’t the only one. At least 4 other ponies were cocooned up, just like Rosewing and all shared the same emaciated, sickly look.
“...How many?”
“5 altogether. If we discount Rosewing, that’s 4 missing ponies. Does that make sense? I don’t remember hearing about any missing.”
“Me neither. We’ll get their story later. Listen, I’m en route. Get out of there and STALL. I’ll rush her hard and fast and she won’t know what hit her.”
You take a deep breath and look back to the captured ponies before sighing. “Take her out first. Got it.”
Making your way back down the tunnel, you leap and take into the air and up out of the changeling’s lair. Clinging to the edge of the hole, you pull yourself up and smile at the perfect crime, only to look at the front door and lock eyes with changeling Rosewing.
Her face is that of utter shock, but you have no idea what’s going on in that head of hers.
So you do the only thing that comes to mind.
“Soooooo... Come here often?” You ask with a suave little smile.
In an instant, the changeling’s face contorts and shifts ever so slightly, the normal eyes of a pony replaced by blue, bug-like eyes. She lets out a high pitched hiss and makes a pounce for you.
Letting go of the edge, you let yourself fall just a bit before flapping your wings and catching yourself, just in time to watch Rose-ling’s body collide with the far closet wall.
Seizing the moment, you take off like a shot out of the hole and into the living room.
A rustle and a hiss is your only warning and you know just what was coming.
Ditzy’s training made your entire body tuned to the signs and signals of a changeling attack and you knew that thing pretending to be Rosewing was pouncing through the air.
With a quick jerk, you’re on your back and under the changeling’s dive. Digging your back hoove’s into its gut, you let out a grunt and use its own momentum against it.
One moment it was sailing towards you, the next it's colliding with the television.
“You bastard,” it chitters and grunts, standing up shakily. “That TV was expensive...”
Every part of you wants to engage in some witty banter, but you know better. You know your mission. With a flick of your foreleg, you have the hoof cannon pointed right at the changeling.
You start to take aim.
And then the changeling starts to scramble for the door.
You don’t know if it knows what you’re packing, but it knows something is being pointed at it and it can’t be good.
With a plume of green flame, the changeling is Rosewing again and galloping into the streets.
Flapping your wings and taking to the air, you get a bird’s eye view and focus all your attention on the changeling.
“Had a shot. Too far for comfort, had to aim. Gave the changeling a chance, it's running.”
“Where?”
“Down east and main, heading to Whitetail Woods. Currently disguised as Rosewi-”
If you had blinked, you would have missed it. In a small flash of green down an empty alley, Rosewing becomes a new pony.
“Change. Mr. Breezy.”
And again.
“Change. Emerald Green.”
And again. I am SO glad I forced myself to learn everypony’s name, you think with a smug smile.
“Change. Honeylime.”
And again.
“Change again. Cherry Berry. We’re at the outskirts now, bearing north to northeast. Target is stable. ETA?”
“I’m less than a minute. Don’t lose sight.”
“Roger.”
Coming in low to the ground, you fly less than a hoof’s throw away from the ground and keep up your speed.
The changeling gives you a few glances over its shoulder and tries to pick up its speed.
That is, before getting hit at full speed by Ditzy side-on.
You watch them tumble to the ground and see Ditzy get the changeling in a full-nelson.
“I got it! I go-”
That was about as much as she was able to get out before the changeling started rapidly shifting from one form to another and wrenching itself every which way. You galloped towards the two, but didn’t even know where to start. But you did see something that they didn’t.
“Ditzy, the edge!”
The chase just had to have ended on top of a hill. Ditzy and the changeling go over the edge and start to tumble down. You dart after them and see Ditzy still holding on for dear life.
Both parties hit the bottom and tumble through a thorn bush and you’re there on the other side.
“Are you okay?!?” You cry out as you touch down. “Are you-”
Ditzy springs to her hooves.
And so does Ditzy.
You raise your hoof cannon and point it between the two before letting out a long, irritated moan.
They looked identical, right down to the wounds and scowl they both wore, directed at the each other.
“No. Come on, no not this. Not this cliche!” You moan out. “Seriously?! We’re doing this? We’re seriously doing this? What the hell am I supposed to do? Start asking personal questions?”
“You have to believe me, she’s the changeling! I was on top of her when she fell!” Ditzy number 1 yells. “Please, I’m the real one!”
You could already feel a headache coming on.
“She’s right. You should shoot me, since she’s obviously the real one.” Ditzy number 2 says.
“Don’t listen t-WAIT, WHAT?!?”
With a snap of your wrist, you level the hoof canon at Ditzy number 1 and fire.
The shot rings out and sounds like a thundercloud just let loose in front of your face.
You had it pointed at her chest and for a split second, you feel like you just made the biggest mistake in your life.
The look on Ditzy’s face; the surprise, the shock and unbelieving stare into your soul as she tries to struggle out a response.
The plume of green fire gives you some sense of relief however and you find yourself letting go of a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.
A slimy, clear liquid starts to dribble from a small hole in the changeling’s chest and it collapses in a heap.
“Oh sweet Celestia, I’m so glad that worked...” Ditzy says, sighing in relief.
“Wha...” You ask dumbly, still trying to process everything that just happened.
“You brought up cliches. That’s what the changeling was hoping on. A cliche. It was trying to buy time.” She says as she looks to you with a big, bright smile. “Figured if I broke the cliche, you’d know who was who.”
It starts off as a chuckle, but you find yourself laughing harder and harder. In one smooth motion, you wrap your hooves around Ditzy and bring her into a crushing embrace.
“I’m soo glad you did that,” you mumble out with a smile. “It’s over. It’s over.”
All we gotta do is bag and tag the changeling, get the captives to a hos-
First comes a rustle.
And then a hiss.
And you do the only thing you can think of: fling Ditzy away as hard as possible.
You turn just in time to watch the changeling pounce on top of you. You struggle and push, but all you can do is let out a strangled cry as a pair of fangs dig itself into your neck and fire races through your veins.
“COLONEL!”
For some reason, the changeling isn’t on top of you anymore.
It’s hard to see... Why’s it so hard to see? You think.
You hear dull thumps and snaps echo through the woods and you futilely try to swallow the lump in your throat. Your throat’s warm and your veins are on fire. That’s when words Ditzy said a while back echo in your head.
“If you don’t bleed out first, the poison will hit your heart and kill right about... Now.”
“Ohhh... Right...” You strangle out.
“Colonel, colonel please. Please stay with me. Stay with me, you can do this.”
You blink rapidly and stare up at Ditzy. And all you can do is laugh when it finally hits you.
“Looks like we couldn’t avoid... every cliche...” You moan out.
She opens her mouth to say something but is cut off when you let out a scream. You thought the poison would hit your heart and just kill you, not torture you.
You arc your back and let out another blood curdling scream as every fiber of your being felt like it was being stretched and pulled and compressed in every which way.
You feel like you’re shaking and look to Ditzy. She doesn’t look as scared anymore.
Horrified would be a better word.
Just as your vision starts to fade, you hear her speak.
“What the buck is going on.”
****************************
The first thing you hear is a heart monitor, the slow, methodical beeping bringing you back to the land of the living. The next is the pain. Your whole body aches; every joint, every bone.
Everything.
Every breath hurts and you have a burning in your chest that gets worse by the moment.
“I’m telling you, he looked like a bucking colt when I brought him in! Dinky looked older! Now he’s old enough to be Granny Smith’s father! And that was AFTER the bucking anti-venom!”
You hear somepony yell. The cobwebs start to slowly be lifted and you open your eyes slowly.
“I WANT SOME BUCKING ANSWERS AND I WANT THEM NOW! CHANGELING VENOM KILLS. IT DOESN’T DO THIS!”
You’re in a hospital bed. There are least seven different IV’s in your forelegs. But that’s not the worrying part. They look... wrinkled. Ancient.
“It’s possible his condition has something to do with this,” a new pony says. “The changeling venom could have exacerbated his-”
“His condition? WHAT CONDITION?!?”
You hear the heart rate monitor pick up a bit, but you don’t care and start to sit up. Your eyes move across the wall and you slowly realize you’re in a Canterlot infirmary. Then your eyes meet the mirror.
“Wha...”
You finally look your age, you hear Honeydew snicker in the back of your mind.
You know now why you feel so bad.
You’re ancient.
The beeping of the monitor kicks into overdrive and whatever yelling match the ponies in the other room were having is cut short as you go into a panic attack.
Years. I was supposed to have years. Not months. Days. You think with tears in your eyes. Hours.
Your heart hurts more than ever and a number of nurses and doctors start pouring over you.
The doctor starts barking out orders while the nurse tries to talk to you and ask you questions.
Looking around the room, you see Ditzy, looking at you in horror. And standing next to her is Twilight.
You may be old, but you can still hear. And you hear what Twilight says. “I’ll tell you everything.”
Those words hurt more than anything right now and you feel the tears really start to flow. “I’m sorry,” you croak out, your voice ragged and gravely. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
“Get me a sedative! He’s going to kill himself if he keeps this up!”
You keep your eyes glued on Ditzy and just keep repeating yourself, for all the good you know it’ll do.
Something cold hits your veins and once more, you find yourself out like a light.
****************************
It’s a case of deja vu when you find yourself coming to again to the sound of the heart monitor. But this time, it’s a lot stronger sounding. And you don’t hurt nearly as much as you did before.
Slowly, you open your eyes and find your forelegs to be closer to what you’re used to.
“Sleep well?”
Ditzy’s voice cuts through you like a knife. It’s not a relieved tone, or even angry. It’s like ice water.
You turn slowly and lock eyes with Ditzy. “W...What happened?”
“Celestia called in your own personal doctors. They say that your body is reacting to the changeling venom. It’s chaotic by nature, a lot like Discord’s magic and interacting with yours. They don’t know what’s happening, but they know it can affect your body. Change it. They’re experimenting.”
She glances up at the IV bags. You follow her gaze and see a bag of bright, green goo and an IV going right into your wrist.
“Wha...”
“Why’d you lie to me?”
You tense up. You wet your lips and remain quiet. You knew she wasn’t done.
“Better yet, why did the Princess lie to me? Why didn’t either of you tell me of your condition? Why did I have to learn it from Twilight?”
“I-”
“And even moreso, why the BUCK was she brewing an AMNESIAC under YOUR direction?!?” Ditzy’s lost her composure. She’s angry and not hiding it. “WELL?!?”
You shake your head slowly. “Condition is... classified...” You mumble out. “Only a hoofful of ponies know.”
“Oh and you didn’t think it was important that I know?!? I thought I was dealing with just another officer! I could have taken a hell of lot more steps if I knew you had close to a century of experience!” Ditzy yells.
She waits for you to say something, but you just stare ahead, trying to hold yourself together.
“What was your plan?” She finally asks. “Seriously. Did you plan on actually using that amnesiac? What were you going to do? Make me forget? Slip away, enjoy the next 100 years without someone like me wei-”
“I’m dying.”
Ditzy’s rant is cut short and she just looks at you, her lip curled up slightly. “What? No, you’re not. The doctors say your condition right now is stable and-”
“Stable is me dying of massive cellular decay in two years.” You feel the tears coming hot and fast now. “I’ve been trying so hard to avoid this. You don’t deserve this.”
You swallow again and try to find your composure, but it’s long gone. “Another time, another life, another chance and I’d’ve asked you out at first sight. You are an amazing mare and you deserve so much. Not this. Not me.”
Taking a deep breath, you steel yourself. “You’re right. I was going to make you forget. Cause I know you. You’ve made a decision and you weren’t gonna back down.” Taking a deep breath, you stare right into Ditzy’s eyes. “You wanted to take this a step further, right?”
“I... I...” Ditzy looks embarrassed and her eyes dart to the floor. “...I... considered it, yes.”
You let out a laugh and sigh. “Called it. Listen Ditzy. I need you to promise me you’ll do something. You have to do this for me.”
“Colonel, I don’t know what you’re planning, but-”
“Sorry to interrupt, but... we’ve got some of the latest labs back.”
Both you and Ditzy look to the doorway.
“Doctor Sure-Cut,” you say with a grimace. “Really know how to ruin the drama.” You say the last words with venom. “What now? We both know it don’t matter. None of it matters. I know when I’m done and I’m ready. Please stop with this false hope and maybes and-”
“If you’d let me tell you, you’d learn it’s not false,” he says curtly. “We’ve been doing some experimentation with Miss Twilight and we have some good news. Very good news.”
There comes a time in life when somepony, somewhere says something that carries the weight of a strong buck to the gut.
“G...Good news?” Your jaw slowly starts to fall.
“What’s the good news?” Ditzy asks breathlessly.
Doctor Sure-Cut just smiles from ear to ear and gives you a look that makes you want to hit him.
That bastard's going to make me eat my words, isn’t he?