It's Not What You Think

by DJDJ


I Can Explain

Rarity had known her boyfriend, Aero Dynamic, since she was in the third grade. Being two years ahead of her in school, he had already graduated, started his career and even scraped together enough to rent his own apartment. After graduation, she lived with him between running an up and coming fashion boutique and battling magical creatures with all of her friends. Her boyfriend, a tall young man, worked swing shifts. Meaning he would be gone in the middle of the afternoon and return late at night.

He fixed his hat over his head, admiring the patch reading “SECURITY” on the front. Next, he buttoned up his shirt, and tucked it in so that the buttons would line up in a straight vertical line down his center. The final touch, was to secure his belt to his waist, he took inventory of all his equipment; baton, cuffs, first aid pouch…gun. When he finished admiring himself in the mirror, he left the bathroom connected to his bedroom, picked up his jacket and bag, stopping on his way out to admire his beautiful girlfriend. It was a cold day and she was content to lounge in her nightgown, laying sideways on the couch, her legs curled up next to her, watching romance movies. This put a warm smile on his face as he wordlessly left the apartment, into the cold, thick fog outside. He yanked on the door handle to his car and set his articles down on the seat next to him, where his ballistics vest was already waiting.

The sound of the front door shutting caught Rarity’s attention. She rushed to the front window to see a figure outside, her beloved, making his way out to his car and driving off into the cloudy distance. Rarity harrumphed, he had left without saying goodbye, again. "Does he really think I don't notice when he sneaks out without so much as a wave or even a quick glance?" She mused to herself indignantly. “Well…I suppose theres only one thing for it.” Rarity huffed aloud to herself.

With the apartment all to herself and her whole evening free, Rarity set to work preparing for her day. She picked a few T shirts out of her boyfriend's dresser, holding them up in front of herself in the mirror. Once she decided on a shirt she grabbed a pair of Aero's uniform pants and the boots he couldn't wear on duty. Having changed into Aero's shirt and pants and even wearing one of his favorite hats, Rarity set his boots down by the couch. The steel toes made it nearly impossible for her to walk in with any amount of dignity but she would put them on when she was ready. Next step, she made her way into the kitchen. "Let's see..." She glanced around the kitchen thinking aloud. "What is it he's always drinking...?" When Rarity checked the refrigerator the orange juice front and center had jogged her memory. "Aha!" She exclaimed smiling widely. She quickly collected the orange juice and some champagne from the refrigerator and searched the pantry for Aero's Huge Sip cup from the local convenience mart.

She set the Huge Sip cup down on the counter and started to fill it with orange juice. “Ooo…” She squeaked, pausing to set her alarm to go off one hour before her special someone would arrive home. “…can’t let him in on Rarity’s little secret now can we…” She mused to herself. After setting her alarm, Rarity set her phone down on the kitchen counter and left to finish preparing for her day alone. As she left the room, her phone vibrated indicating a low battery charge.

Rarity finished brewing Aero's favorite concoction. With the cup in both hands, she raised her pinky finger on her right hand and took a modest sip. She smiled to herself remembering all the times she'd come home to smell this drink on his breath when they kissed. Rarity set the beverage down on the coffee table, sat in the couch and secured Aero's boots around her feet. It took both hands to lift each foot onto the coffee table and cross her legs over each other. Finally she was ready for the final step to begin her evening, she grabbed the TV remote and turned on a baseball game in which Aero's favorite team was playing.

Rarity spent the rest of her evening watching Aero's favorite teams play his favorite sports, his favorite action movies starring his favorite actors, and nursing her recreation of his favorite drink. Late in the evening, in the middle of a hockey game, Rarity's little secret would come undone.

“COME ON 32!! ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO TAKE THAT NONSENSE FROM A ZEBRA!” Rarity growled at the top of her lungs, it was then that she noticed her one and only in the hallway staring at her, mouth slightly agape.

Aero Dynamic stared at his girlfriend, Rarity, in shock mouth slightly agape. Rarity yelling at the television was very much unlike her, it was that and everything about her appearance that had stunned him. Rarity was sitting slouched on the couch in a pose very unbecoming of a lady of her refinement and she wore his fitted baseball cap, which had the letters “PV” embroidered onto the front. She was also wearing his t-shirt which displayed the words “rep your hood” in western typeface along with his black cargo pants and tan boots. All of which was at least four sizes too big for her and hung off her slender body almost comically.

Rarity carefully took a sip from the Huge Sip cup, which she had gotten out when Aero left, in a desperate effort to buy herself some time to try to think of something to say. After a slow, calculated sip, all she could think to say was, “It’s not what it looks like.”

Aero took another moment to absorb exactly all that was going on and asked impatiently, “What is this? Do you just dress up like me and act like me when I’m gone?” Rarity’s cheeks burned a hot red as she smiled guiltily and nodded. Aero’s expression sank into disappointment and he raised his voice at her, “Rarity I’m shocked!” He snatched the cup from Rarity as she pulled her shirt collar up over her mouth to try and hide herself.

“I can explain?” She tried desperately.

“Is this…” Aero took a generous sip from the cup and recoiled, “…a mimosa? You of all people should know mimosas are a breakfast drink! A brunch cocktail at the VERY latest!”

Rarity came out from the cover of her boyfriend’s shirt, “I beg your pardon?” She mused, her expression contorting into a curious frown.

Aero took a few more sips of the mimosa. “You know I drink scotch this late at night, bourbon if it’s extra cold like tonight!” He scolded her. Rarity sat upright on the couch assuming a more modest posture. Aero looked at the television then back to Rarity, pointing at the game she was watching, “The hockey I approve of, but you’re a lady of finer details, you should know what I like to drink at what time.”

Rarity stood up and raised her hand and opened her mouth to speak but hesitated. She glanced down then back up to Aero, “You’re…not mad that I’m wearing your ensemble?”

Aero folded his arms and shrugged. “Not even a little.”

Rarity’s eyes narrowed and she followed up, “Are you absolutely certain?” She asked suspiciously.

Aero shook his head and sat Rarity down on the couch next to him, leaving the mimosa on the coffee table. “I do have some questions.”

Rarity puffed her cheeks and exhaled, crossing her arms, “Of course you do.” She pouted, looking down into her lap. As her beloved opened his mouth to ask her something she interrupted. “I can already see where this is going. They’re…comfy, alright? Your clothes are…comfier than mine. Happy?” She lied badly, turning her nose up at him.

Aero held back a chuckle, “No,” Rarity uncrossed her arms and slouched into her seat disappointedly. “I know you girl, you can do comfy AND stylish. I know you don’t have to resort to this get up to get comfortable.”

“Fine.” She snapped back at him, furrowing her brow, turning her gaze back to her lap.

Aero paused waiting for her to elaborate. After a few moments of silence, “’Fine’ what?” He coaxed, not even trying to downplay his amusement.

Rarity sighed and let her expression soften, “I feel like you’re always out working.” Aero cocked his head at her curiously. “Whenever you’re home I’m either slumbering or out with my friends or at the boutique.” She pined.

“Is that what this is all about? My shift?” Aero put on a gentle smile, taking his hat off of Rarity’s head, freeing her bouncy purple curls. As he did so, Rarity sat upright in the couch and turned her gaze back down. “You know, I have some seniority now, maybe I could switch to day shift if you want…”

Rarity turned and faced the other way, “I don’t think that’s really the point.” She lamented.

The couple sat in eerie silence until Aero spoke up again. “Then what?”

Rarity took a deep breath, closing her eyes and trying to hold back tears. She turned to him and pleaded, “Darling, why do you never bid me farewell?” only just keeping her voice from cracking. She locked her eyes to his awaiting his answer.

Aero had long dreaded this conversation. He was supposed to be the most constant part of Rarity’s life; he had been since they were children. In his mind he was about to admit to weakness. “I…” He tried. Fumbling on the first try, he took a deep breath and tried again, “Theres a really good reason I never say goodbye.” He admitted.

Rarity’s gaze hardened, “Well, what is it then?” She demanded impatiently. Aero didn’t answer; he only stared distantly into his lap. Rarity didn’t let the silence between them last very long. “What reason could there possibly be to duck your head and stroll out that door every night?” Rarity started raising her voice to Aero indignantly. “Why wouldn’t you WANT to say goodbye when it could be the last time I EVER see you AGAIN.” She shouted, Rarity was no longer holding back her tears and she couldn’t stop herself from smacking Aero in the shoulder on the words she emphasized.

Aero stood up and took a few steps away. Rarity got up and followed him at a reasonable distance awaiting his reply. When he stopped to turn and face her, he saw that she had a cross look on her face and she rested her fists on her hips.

Instead of letting Rarity’s…ladylike...attempts to cause harm bother him, Aero shut his eyes tight and took a deep breath through his nose. As he took a few steps back, he covered his eyes with his hands and took another breath. When he removed his hand from his eyes, he beheld the sight before him. Rarity dressed in his own clothes, glaring at him with irreconcilable hurt. She wasn’t going to make this easy on him. One last deep breath later and Aero summoned the courage to look her in the eye and finally spoke up. “Every time I say goodbye to you, I have to let you go.” He choked out meagerly. Rarity’s gaze softened just a little as Aero let his words hang in the air. He looked down at the ground in shame. “I just…have to stop caring…to say goodbye.” He quavered on the verge of tears, turning to face away from Rarity

Although his answer caught Rarity off guard, she wasn’t ready to let him off the hook. “The way you've been acting lately Darling, I can't help but wonder if you actually do care.” She spat, immediately realizing what she had just said she covered her mouth and her eyes went wide immediately wishing she hadn't said it.

Aero froze in place when Rarity's words hit his ears. He turned back to face Rarity with complete shock on his face. "How could you even think something like that?" He challenged her with disgust.

Rarity squared up to Aero boldly, planting her balled up fists on her hips. "I think the better question is how you can expect me to even stay when you pretend I don't exist half of the time!" She defended, pointing an accusatory finger at him. Standing up for herself only made Aero angry. He swatted her finger away violently. Aero opened his mouth and held up his hand ready to explode at Rarity. When he saw her recoil slightly, he took a deep breath and softened his expression before he could say anything he would regret. Aero looked away from Rarity for a few moments, trying to calm himself down and think of what to tell her.

Aero took a step towards Rarity and tried to clear his throat, “I can’t ever say goodbye because I would have to ADMIT to myself…and to you, that theres just a chance I’ll never see you again.” He explained himself gently to her. He shrugged helplessly and elaborated, "I couldn't even look you in the eye with that on my mind." When he continued speaking he began to fall apart and he couldn’t hold back his tears any longer, “I can’t do that every single day.” He stated hopelessly. “I can’t ever face you knowing I might just break your heart.”

Rarity finally softened her whole posture and she even began to show guilt on her features. Aero shrugged his shoulders “I’m sorry you think I just don’t care or whatever but…I just can’t do that to myself. I know you worry, but I can’t. I love you Rarity.” He finished, his voice back under his control, although tears still streamed down his cheeks as he gazed at Rarity desperately. Rarity grabbed his shirt, catching him off guard she yanked him into herself, quickly wrapping her arms around him as tight as she could.

Rarity tightened her grip on Aero and said to him, “My love, I didn’t mean to…I just need to hear you say so more often.”

“What?” Aero asked uncertainly, limp in Rarity’s arms. Despite the size difference and his weight, Rarity was holding him up very steadily. He considered what he had just said to her and tried, “I love you?”

“That’s it Darling.” Rarity affirmed, letting Aero go sliding her hands down his arm then gripping his own as she separated herself from him. “You don’t have to say goodbye to me. Ever.” She started reassuringly, “Just…remind me, how you feel when you leave. Sometimes?” She asked hunching her shoulders looking up at him hopefully.

For a moment Aero was confused, when he put together what Rarity had said, a smile exploded on his face and he nodded softly. “I can do that. All the time.” He said excitedly. Rarity smiled at Aero hopefully and reached up with one hand to wipe his tears away. She held both his hands again and stood up on her toes to kiss him. Aero leaned into Rarity after their lips met, so she could get back down on her heels for a prolonged, warm kiss.

When their lips separated, they gazed passionately into each other’s eyes. Aero was enchanted by Rarity’s deeply blue eyes and likewise she was lost in his lighter blue. Aero gently cupped the side of Rarity’s face in his hand and she grasped his wrist tenderly. They stayed staring into each other’s eyes until Rarity took a deep breath and lead Aero back to the couch. “Come Darling, we have a game to finish.” She enthused, putting the cap she was wearing on Aero’s head.

Aero's favorite hockey team was cleaning house but the game wasn't really on his mind. He cast a glance at Rarity, who was curled up under his arm, still wearing his clothes. Deciding he should say something about how he acted during their argument, he took a deep breath and nudged her shoulder to get her attention. Rarity sat up under Aero's arm and stared at him expectantly. "Rarity..." he started softly. "Sorry if I...terrified you earlier. You know I would never-"

Rarity wouldn't allow him to finish, she rested a hand on his chest and spoke over him, "Of course I know you wouldn't." Aero was still upset, glancing into his lap. "Darling I've seen that look in your eyes a hundred times before." Aero stayed silent, unsure that he wouldn't have let out all of his stress on her. It took Rarity a moment to think of a way to break the ice and convince him she knew him better than he did. "Do you remember in middle school, before you graduated to Crystal Prep, when some of the other girls would tease me for being vain?"

Aero looked at her curiously. He wasn't sure where she was taking the conversation, all the same he played along. "Sometimes they would play keep away with your sewing kit or hair brush or stuff like that." He reminisced.

Rarity nodded, her face lighting up with excitement, "Whenever you came to save the day, you had that very same look right before telling them off or snatching back my belongings from them." She reminded him enthusiastically. Aero only blinked at her absently. Rarity cleared her throat and continued, "You always stood up for other kids. That's just who you are Dear." She nudge him encouragingly.

Aero sighed and looked away, taking his arm off Rarity resting it in his lap. "Ever since I started this job, I feel like that all the time now. Whenever I get sad, or annoyed, or hurt, or...anything, I just get so mad and I want to lash out at whoever." He lamented to Rarity, averting his eyes every time she tried to angle herself to look him in the eye. "I don't want to just...become that." He said aloud to himself.

Rarity took Aero by the jaw and turned him to look at her coy smile. "Well, lucky for you Deary, I'll never let you forget who you really are." She encouraged, surprising him, yanking him into a kiss. After a moment he shut his eyes and kissed her back. He couldn't stop himself smiling when their lips separated. The game had finished some time during their heart to heart, so they both agreed to call it a night.

As the couple was getting ready for bed, Aero was putting away his uniform and Rarity, already in her pajamas was working on removing her makeup. Aero leaned into the bathroom doorway next to Rarity. “Hey Babe…” He began cautiously.

“Hm?” Rarity answered half aware of him.

Aero folded his arms and shrugged, “How do you do it? You and your friends?” He asked, causing Rarity to freeze in place.

Rarity let Aero’s question hang in the air between them for a few moments before turning to face him, confused. “What ever do you mean?”

Aero shrugged again, “You know…that thing…you girls do together.” He continued bashfully. Rarity raised an eyebrow and shook her head. “You know…” Aero shook his hands whimsically “Your whole magic world saving deal. Battling the forces of darkness and all.”

“Oh.” Rarity answered distantly. She squeezed past Aero and headed back into the bedroom. She sat on her side of the bed holding her knees to her chest. Aero sat across from her cross-legged and lent Rarity his ear. “Well…” She sighed, “I’m sorry I still don’t know what you mean.”

“Aren’t you ever afraid something’ll go wrong?” Aero clarified for her.

Rarity had to take a moment to look away and think. When she was ready to answer she looked him in the eye, “Of course, but…I never have time to dwell on it.” She had to look back down to keep thinking, Aero sat patiently across from her, waiting for her to finish. “It usually happens so fast…and my friends are always there for me.”

Aero smiled with slight relief. “Of course they are.” He said under his breath.

Rarity smiled softly looking back down at the bed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply…” Aero held his hand up to stop her mid sentence.

Aero reached over and gently ran his knuckles over Rarity’s cheek. “It’s okay. I’m glad you have friends who can give you so much strength.” Rarity smiled warmly back at Aero as they sat in silence a few more moments. “So how’s Applejack?” Aero asked finally.

Rarity’s smile faded and she reached for Aero’s hands. “Darling you can’t possibly still be blaming yourself.” She begged him. Aero’s expression sank and he looked down into his lap. Rarity gripped his hands tighter and gave them a shake. “Sweet Heart her boyfriend’s death was a complete accident. None of us saw it coming and no one could have stopped it.” She reminded him desperately.

Aero sighed and looked back up at Rarity. “I know.” He relented, “But I’m still the one who trapped him in that world.” He lamented.

"Sweetheart-" rarity tried.

"I still can't look Twilight in the eye." Aero interrupted hastily. "He looked up to us. Shining Armor and I did everything we could to-" He stopped himself short, shutting his eyes tight and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I can't help but think if I was actually a good influence on him all those years ago he'd still be around." He sighed letting his hand fall into his lap. He stared mindlessly ahead of him. "I was just a stupid kid...HE was just a kid. The worst part is, we just wanted to mess with him."

Rarity lay Aero down on his back and she lay on her side facing him, running her hand in a circle on his chest. “He made his choices, Love. I’m not going to tell you your behavior when you knew him wasn’t irresponsible, it absolutely was. Regardless, your time with him at Crystal Prep, at least partly, brought him to us, to Applejack, however briefly.” Aero closed his eyes and sighed guiltily. “Precious, you have to believe us all. You didn’t kill him.” She reassured Aero desperately. Aero sat up in the bed and started clenching his teeth. “No one blames you but yourself. Not me, not Applejack, not his father, not Dean Cadence and not even Twilight hold you responsible for his demise in any way.”

Every time Rarity gave him that speech, it assuaged Aero’s guilt and each time she reminded him, Applejack’s boyfriend’s death wasn’t his fault, he believed it a little more. Aero’s guilt was put to rest enough he decided it was time to go down for the night. He nodded at Rarity and lay back down in bed and wrapped and arm around Rarity’s stomach as she turned over to put her back to his front. He held her in the stillness of their dark bedroom. After a moment Rarity whispered “Darling…”

“Hm?” Aero answered on his way to falling asleep.

“I’m still going to wear your ‘hood’ shirt when you’re out.” She whispered back to him.

“Fine, be that way.” Aero joked under his breath.

The silence returned briefly before Rarity broke it “I love you Aero Dynamic.”