//------------------------------// // An (Unbearably) Sunny Day // Story: Nock One Up // by Pony with a Pen //------------------------------// The sun hung low over Equestria that day, bathing all who ventured outside in its oppressive heat and bright yellow glow. Canterlot stood quietly underneath its brilliant rays, attempting to survive the blistering temperatures. A few ponies still braved the streets, whether out of stubbornness or the need to earn a paycheck, but Celestia could only guess how many more were hiding inside air-conditioned buildings. Even the restless, energetic foals of the School for Gifted Unicorns chose to stay inside today. Nopony wanted to play outside after they saw one of their classmates burn her hooves by walking on the pavement. Despite the sweat profusely streaming down her coat, though, Celestia was perfectly comfortable. She lounged on her velvet couch, completely naked, which wasn’t nearly as seductive as she wished. Her regalia wasn’t exactly modest, both in how much in cost and how much it covered. Hopefully Long Arrow had a hoof fetish. Either way, today would be hot and heavy—literally and figuratively. When she had woken up this morning, Celestia had made sure of it by moving the sun just slightly closer to Equus than normal. A little extra heat and an ingenious plan would set things in motion, and a bit of stallion hormones and lust would finish the job. Pulling the sun out of its proper orbit may have been drastic, but it wouldn’t have any lasting consequences. Equestria could endure one day of unseasonably warm weather. Besides, Celestia doubted anypony would even notice. “The end draws nigh!” a deranged pony screamed as he galloped through the streets of Manehattan. Across the street, a young mare and stallion paused their amicable chat to stare at the crazed pony as he dashed towards them through heavy traffic. “Can’t you ponies see it?! Or has the Sun Hag already blinded you with your demise?” he yelled while pointing towards the sun. Glancing nervously at each other, the pair mentally cursed themselves for arriving at the bus stop so early. “She wishes to see Equestria reduced to ash, and with it, all who oppose her tyrannical regime!” the pony continued shouting. “Then, she will set fire to the oceans and bathe the world in hellish flames!” The mare anxiously checked her watch while the pony rambled on, screaming unintelligibly. After a couple minutes of looking for an escape, the stallion excitedly pointed a hoof and exclaimed over the screeching pony, “Oh, hey, look! Those Royal Guards are handing out free ice cream!” Whipping his head around to follow the outstretched hoof, the pony gasped and began shouting once more. “LIES! POISON! DECEIT!” After passing an ice cream bar down to a small filly, one of the guards looked over to see the manic pony yelling at them. He was nearly a block away but appeared to be furiously charging toward them, halving the distance in seconds. When the other guard noticed his approach, he readied an ice cream bar and prepared himself to defuse the situation. This heat was messing with ponies’ minds; everypony was going to go crazy if it kept up. Honestly, he was surprised that this was the only one today—at least, so far. Once the pony finally drew near to them, he scowled at the filly. “Little one, don’t be fooled by their bribery!” the pony ranted as he smacked the ice cream out of the filly’s hoof. Pointing his hoof accusingly at the guards but keeping his attention on the filly, he continued, “They wear the emblem of the fiery goddess’s regime! They cannot be trusted! It’s all part of Celestia’s diabolical plan to—” “I think that’s enough,” the first guard interjected as he roughly looped his forehoof around one of the pony’s legs. “What?” The pony angrily turned towards the guard, prepared to give him an earful before being interrupted by a second forehoof looping around his opposite leg. “I agree. Why don’t we go find you a nice room with air-conditioning, hmm?” the second guard said as he tightened his grip on the pony’s leg. “What?! No! You can kill me, but you’ll never take away freedom! FFFRRREEEEEEDOOOOOMMMM!!!!” Nopony would notice. Propping herself up on the couch, Celestia twisted her head to look around the room. As far as bedrooms go, Celestia’s was almost certainly one of the cleanest, but now wasn’t the time for assumptions. Her eyes traveled around the room, checking for debris on the floor or dust on the furniture. Failing to find any, she continued on to the vanity table. After searching for any embarrassing personal hygiene products left out in the open, Celestia flashed a wide smile at the mirror. A dazzlingly beautiful white Alicorn across the room smiled back at her with teeth brushed, flossed, and whitened to perfection. Taking a deep breath, Celestia relaxed her body and turned to face the door. “Guards,” she called softly while putting on her best sultry look. *BANG* “Yes, Princess!” a unicorn mare shouted from the doorway as threatening red magic emanated from her horn, scanning the room for threats. Finding no would-be assassins—only Celestia’s disinterested gaze—the mare came to attention and awaited her orders. Celestia suppressed a sigh. In hindsight, assigning guards from the bad part of Canterlot to the castle wasn’t the best idea. Always so tense. It would be good for them in the long run, of course. Everypony in the Royal Guard needs to shake things up now and then. However, Celestia didn’t know if the castle doors could withstand much more shaking. She would have to find something to help the reassigned guards relax. Yoga classes, perhaps. Reminding herself of how her plan was meant to play out, Celestia asked, “There wouldn’t happen to be any… pegasus guards nearby, would there?” There was a pegasus guard nearby. One pegasus guard, to be precise. “What can I do for you, Your Highness?” Private Long Arrow said, peeking his head through the door. It was Long Arrow. Long Arrow was the pegasus guard—the only pegasus guard in this wing of the castle, in fact. “Oh, Private Long Arrow, what a coincidence,” Celestia said with feigned surprise and a hint smugness. She nodded to the unicorn mare and continued addressing Arrow, “Yes, please, come in.” Taking Celestia’s cue for her to leave, the unicorn mare passed by Arrow as she slipped through the door. Once she was out of the doorway, he strode calmly into the room, leaving the door slightly ajar as he came in. Like a good little stallion, he walked to the center of the room and awaited her orders. Oh, they were going to have so much fun together. “Long Arrow.” Celestia beckoned him with a hoof. “Closer.” He took a few steps forward, and then a few more steps when he saw that Celestia continued to motion him towards her. Once he stood directly beside her on the couch, Celestia leaned forward, meeting Long Arrow’s eyes. “I’m soooo hot,” she said, fluttering her eyelashes like the mares in Cosmarepolitan told her to. “Would you fan me?” “Of course, Princess,” Long Arrow replied. Gently hopping into the air, he proceeded to make long, smooth strokes with his wings, fanning as much air onto her as possible. “Oh!” Celestia recoiled from the initial burst of air hitting her face, but she soon settled into the rhythmic flapping of his wings and the cool air each wingbeat provided. Considering that she had been sitting in her own sweat for over an hour now—the velvet couch beneath her was beginning to drip—this breeze felt heavenly. Celestia allowed herself a small smile; her plan couldn’t be going better. She had a stallion all alone in her bedroom, waiting on her hoof and fetlock, while she sat naked on the couch. And Luna thought that she’d lost her touch. In her mind’s eye, Celestia saw the burning desire on Long Arrow’s face and all the naughty, naughty things that he was conjuring up in his imagination. She could feel him lusting after the luscious curves of her body, and who was she to stop him? Adjusting herself on the couch to give him a better view, Celestia turned her head just enough to glimpse Long Arrow’s face out of the corner of her eye. She couldn’t wait to see him squirming, desperately trying to hold back his uncontrollable sexual urges. The sexual urges which, apparently, he didn’t have. Unless, somehow, ponies now expressed their sexual tension by relaxing their posture, making steady and methodical movements, and staring stoically ahead. Ponyfeathers. His Royal Guard training must have taken over, Celestia mused. Darn that unemotional, unfeeling, passionless training. Instructors at the academy had always taught recruits to be assertive and tough, but when had they become so infatuated with stoicism? Can’t a guard act on his forbidden, kinky desires and have hot, sweaty sex with his Princess anymore? What had her kingdom come to? Celestia rested her head against the couch and blew a strand of her mane away from her eyes. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. This didn’t ruin her plan; Long Arrow just felt that she was unobtainable, unreachable. He was an inexperienced, insecure stallion next to the most beautiful, intelligent, and kind mare he had ever known. They barely knew each other, and she already had him in a situation rife with sexual tension. How could he possibly know how to react? To show his true feelings? Maybe he just needed some encouragement. “Mmmn… oooohhh, Long Arrow...” Outside the room, the unicorn mare maintained her vigilant watch without Long Arrow while a maid slowed her step near the doorway. She stared at it quizzically before deviating from her original path to approach the door. “State your business,” the guard said brusquely as she cut off the maid’s approach. Ignoring the Royal Guard’s demand, the mare shifted her head to look past the guard and through the crack in the door. “What are those noises coming the Princess’s room?” “They are none of your concer—” *MOAN* “Is Princess Celestia all right?” the maid asked. “Private Long Arrow is with Her Highness. She is—” “Oh, YES! Harder! Harder!” Glancing backward towards the door, the unicorn mare quietly continued, “…fine.” Silence overtook the two as they gaped at the unspeakable noises coming from the bedroom. Eventually, a pair of guards trotted down the hallway on their patrol, but suddenly halted next to the door in shock. They stood motionlessly by the door, horrified, before one guard pointed towards the bedroom with a hoof. Both mares responded with an absentminded nod. Slowly, other ponies began gathering around the door. Handyponies, butlers, chefs, maids, and guards alike all stopped to join the steadily growing crowd. Though many of them had jobs to do, nopony could pull themselves away from the doorway and the loud, obscene noises coming from it. None of them said a word—none of them dared to—and nopony came within three feet of the door. After some time, a lieutenant walked up to the group of ponies surrounding the Princess’s private chambers. “What is going—” “Shhhh,” a few of the huddled ponies shushed. “Aaahhhh! Don’t stop—YES! Right there! Keep going!” A confused mix of horror and disgust crept over his face. “I can’t believe you would all—” “MORE, ARROW! MORE!” In a panic, the lieutenant began pushing his way through the ponies, forcing his way to the door. “All right, that’s enough of—” “GIVE ME ALL YOU’VE GOT!” Fumbling and stumbling his way through the throng of ponies blocking the door, the stallion desperately clawed his way to the door before finally breaking through the crowd. “Okay, show’s ov—” “OOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!” For a moment, the castle quieted. All of the assembled ponies blanched as slowly, silently, the lieutenant raised a hoof to the doorknob and pulled the door shut with a soft click. Everypony continued facing the door, blankly staring ahead and considering whether or not a pony could go to Tartarus for eavesdropping. “Oooh. Thank you, Private Arrow. I think that’s enough.” Princess Celestia hungrily looked over Long Arrow’s form as he breathed heavily through his nose, trying to hide his exhaustion. Of course, after the workout she had given him, he couldn’t possibly hide it. Sweat dripped from his mane and the openings in his armor, and his chest heaved with each breath. Arrow wouldn’t have broken a sweat if he was wearing the standard issue pegasus armor, but that’s not what he was wearing. Inside the castle, guards now wore considerably heavier armor—a safety precaution taken after the changeling invasion, Tirek’s rampage, Discord’s escape, and a few other miscellaneous incidents. Most of the time, Celestia regretted the need for such precautions, but not right now. Right now, she was admiring the glistening muscles on Long Arrow’s flank. Disappointingly, the sexual tension between them continued to go nowhere. By now, she expected to see the lust burning in his male gaze—or at least an attempt to glance at her rump—but his eyes only looked straight ahead. Just to his left, a voluptuous princess lay splayed out on a velvet couch for his viewing pleasure, but whatever, her bedroom walls were interesting too. Oh well, on to the next part of her plan. “My goodness, Long Arrow, you look as if you’re melting from the heat,” Celestia said as she grinned demurely. “Perhaps you should take a shower?” “Thank you for your concern, Your Highness, but I cannot leave my post,” Long Arrow replied wearily. “No need to leave your post,” Celestia giggled. “Use my shower, I insist.” “I don’t—” “I insist,” Celestia said warmly as she tilted her head down and met the stallion’s eyes. Despite what her libido had to say on the matter, Long Arrow wasn’t that dense. This wasn’t an offer; it was an order. “I… Thank you, Princess. I believe I will go do that.” Bowing briefly before walking to the bathroom, Arrow disappeared behind the door as he shut it behind him. Good little stallion. Shortly afterward, Celestia heard his armor quietly clank on the floor. Though she had yet to see him without his armor, the thought of his toned, muscular body made her shiver with excitement. Sounds of knobs turning and water pattering against the tile of the bathroom only furthered Celestia’s anticipation. With Long Arrow out of the room and “getting more comfortable” in her shower, it was time to strike, and she could barely contain herself. The shower was turned on, and she was certainly turned on—now only Long Arrow was left. Rising from the couch, Celestia practiced her sway as she stealthily approached the bathroom door. At her touch, the door creaked open ever so softly, giving her just enough room to peek inside unnoticed. Long Arrow stood directly in the showerhead’s stream with his eyes closed, letting the water wash over him and soak into his mane, tail, and coat before running down his muscular legs. Pushing the door open, Celestia set her hooves down one at a time on the bathroom tile and crept towards the shower. Each step brought her closer, but only tested her patience more. As she drew near to him, the bath rug tickled her hooves and nearly forced a giggle out of her. Holding it in, Celestia thanked the heavens once the shower finally came within reach. She slid the door open and smiled as she stepped inside behind Long Arrow. “Hello, my little stal-l-l-l-l-l—” Cold water. Very, very cold water. Turning around, Long Arrow offered a small frown. “My apologies, Princess, do you need the shower?” “N-n-nonsense, th-there’s plenty of r-r-room.” Why was the water so cold?! “I’m gl-glad to h-have the c-c-company.” Seriously, why was the water so freaking cold? “To be in your company is an honor, Princess,” Long Arrow replied with a nod, before turning around to face the showerhead once again. Well, at least the situation didn’t make him uncomfortable; that was a start. Of course, Celestia couldn’t say the same—she was extremely uncomfortable, and after fifteen seconds of (unsuccessfully) trying to adjust, she needed to do something. Tilting her head and trying to maintain her smile, Celestia asked, “L-Long Arrow?” “Yes, Your Highness?” Long Arrow answered, still facing into the water. “W-w-would y-you like to use h-h-hot water?” “I always take cold showers—it’s a habit I picked up in the academy.” “Mhmm.” Celestia nodded her head up and down rapidly, trying not to scream. Second after second, hundreds of droplet drenched her coat and mane, attacking her like tiny frozen daggers. “Princess?” Long Arrow hesitantly turned around. “Would you prefer to use hot water?” Still smiling and nodding furiously, Celestia replied, “Th-that would be n-n-nice.” “Of course,” Long Arrow said as he turned towards the shower handles. “Allow me.” Grabbing both handles with his hooves, he gently twisted them in opposite directions. Slowly, Celestia’s shoulders relaxed and the tension in her neck released as hot water flooded her with warmth and relief from the bitter cold. Breathing in the comforting steam and sighing deeply, she let her back legs collapse beneath her. Her rump slid to the floor, and she propped herself up with her front hooves while the water soaked into her mane. As Celestia watched water swirl around the shower drain, she couldn’t help but think of her plans. Long Arrow was still here, soaking wet and sexy as Tartarus, but even an Alicorn’s sex drive can’t survive an ice-cold shower. She had planned on some soapy shenanigans with him—maybe they could have “helped” each other “wash up”—but it simply wasn’t worth it. The moment was gone. The thought of a roll in the hay still excited Celestia, but the haystack had turned into a stack of pins today. Carefully rotating himself in the shower, Long Arrow turned to face Celestia and sat down. He silently looked at her unmoving, emotionless gaze and followed it towards the shower floor. There, both ponies quietly stared at the space between them, watching the water flow towards the drain in the center. “Long day?” “No, actually,” Celestia indifferently replied. “Since we’re getting closer to winter, the days are getting shorter. Today, the sun is only in the sky for… You’re not asking about the sun.” “No, Princess Celestia, I am not,” Long Arrow said. The water continued to rain down around them, splashing against the floor and walls before running down the drain. Neither pony looked at the other, choosing instead to watch the water trickle from their hooves and manes until it too disappeared down the drain. Celestia considered responding. An honest conversation would be nice. She abhorred small talk, canned responses, and platitudes, despite how often her position demanded all three. There was nothing to be said, though—not to him, unfortunately. And so she didn’t respond, instead allowing the drizzle of the shower to drown out her downcast thoughts and his attempt at conversation with her. Minutes passed by in this manner, until she eventually rose to their hooves and turned off the shower in silence. Toweling herself off, Celestia watched as Long Arrow carefully stood up on the wet tile. Before she could offer him a towel, he had already shaken the water from his coat and mane. Then, while she finished drying herself, Long Arrow hefted his armor over his back and fastened the straps before stepping into his hoof guards. After the two trotted out of the bathroom, Celestia turned to the balcony door and looked outside at the low-hanging sun. “Thank you for your assistance, Private. You are dismissed,” Celestia said. Behind her, she could hear the slight jostle of his armor as he bowed, and then two soft clicks from the door as he left. Releasing the sigh she had been holding in, Celestia reminded herself that these things take time. And sometimes alcohol. Closing the Princess’s bedroom door behind him, Long Arrow looked to the guard waiting beside the doorway. “Returning to duty, Ma’am. Did any incidents occur while I was assisting the Princess?” “No, uh, Private,” the unicorn mare said, avoiding eye contact.