If you knew something about minotaurs, you would know how much they hated chains. They would only use them in machinery, for those arrangements of gears where nothing else could possibly work and even then, they would resist to the last. They despised tying any of their own down and loathed confinement, for true freedom included the right to move where one wished.
But if you knew something about minotaurs, you would also know they weren't stupid. And so of the two bulls waiting in the cold room of reinforced stone and metal, with police officers watching every movement through an enchanted, reinforced panel of quartz (but unable to hear the words, for prisoners speaking in conference had the right to privacy for their words alone), one had been attached to his chair. One arm had been left free, so he could accept the glasses of water which the police were increasingly reluctant to provide. It also gave him the ability to pretend he was about to sign documents, right up until the moment he laughed and refused yet again, generally with that special smirk which made the officers consider whether water should be coming at all. His ankles had also been lashed to the chair's front legs, and that seat had been bolted to the floor. For minotaurs cherished their freedoms, and so had a hard time dealing with the ones who took those rights away.
This one had traded the right of others to life for a few scant bits. Minotaur law dictated that he be given food and water. Minotaur instincts urged them to take away air. But they could not, at least for this stage, not while the current part of the law ruled them. The dealer knew that, and smirked.
He turned to his lawyer, at least in the movement of his head. That had been left free, and everyone had already learned to stay well back from deliberately-sharpened horns.
"She's late," he said. "Maybe she decided she's got better things to do."
The attorney said nothing, for there were times when silence was legally advisable.
The dealer snorted. "Her funeral." And a snicker. "Lots of funerals."
She heard all that, for she was in the approach hallway, and only the observation post was blocked from sound. She heard the true amusement in it. And then she stepped forward, deliberately planting her hooves with extra weight, so they would know she was coming.
"Huh," the dealer noted as the sounds reached him. "So that's either the world's fattest pony, or..."
They had given her a key. She used it, and stepped inside.
"So what do I call you?" the dealer asked with a completely false camaraderie. "Her Royal Whiteness? Lady Highhooves? No, wait, I've got it -- how about I call you what you are?" And he grinned. "Trespasser."
"You asked to speak with me," Celestia calmly said as her field closed the door behind her. "I'm here. What do you want, Choke Hold?"
The dealer's grin became wider. He leaned forward slightly, as much as the binding would allow, and rested his right elbow on the table. "We'll talk in a few minutes. After he talks." A nod to the attorney. "Mr. Heenan?"
The lawyer took a precise step forward. Celestia didn't move.
"You were trespassing on the property," he began.
"Your client," Celestia calmly replied, "has no deed to that property. When you don't own something, it's rather hard to claim trespass. However, if you're admitting it's his property, then you're also opening yourself to having the things on that property as potentially, and legally, belonging to him. So let's just clear up whose property it is right now, shall we?"
Mr. Heenan stared at her. She stared right back.
"The property," the lawyer tried, just a little less sure of himself than before, "when it comes to ownership, does not matter. The land is in a wild zone. It has no owner, and so it has no one it can be purchased from. It belongs to the one who is willing to take the risk of settling it. Which someone clearly did, as there are buildings there. However, that individual is not necessarily my client. There is an argument to be made that he simply found the abandoned results of the last settlement attempt, in the company of his friends, and tried to move in. Just in time for you to attack."
There was a table between them, and numerous metal chairs around it for interviewing officers to fume in. Two sturdy benches were present for the use of the ponies on the force. Nothing was suitable for Celestia to rest on other than the table itself, and she would have preferred for it not to be there at all. It prevented her from approaching directly, stopping right in front of them and looming. Instead, she simply stood at the far end, near the door.
"Oh," she said. "I see where this is going. Speaking to the officers on my way in gave me a few hints, but being told about the painting that's in progress never lets you appreciate the true artistry. Not like a direct viewing." She bemusedly shrugged. "Do you mind if I cut this a little short? Here's your arguments as I see them. Mr. Hold and his friend are innocent victims. They had just claimed the property when a group of ponies, who have yet to truly account for why they were in the area at all, especially as none of them are currently obligated to do so, raided them with intent to hurt, and so your poor client -- clients? How many are you representing? Well, at any rate, he defended himself, along with all his friends. And the drugs? Grown instantly by earth pony magic: certainly a Princess should be able to prove she can do that or rather, on the stand, won't be able to prove she can't. It's a frame job, a horrible frame by those hateful Equestrians who just -- let me try this one out -- wanted the land for themselves? And the notebooks were planted, the bodies were created by us, and all you need is a jury stupid enough to buy all of it, which in Mazein is going to be a challenge, especially since your trials still work by supermajority. One idiot isn't enough to derail: you'd need at least three. But you can threaten three -- oh, did I say threaten? Discuss the trial with. In private. Possibly in a room where the walls are covered in whips."
The dealer snorted, and some of it seemed to be in amusement. The lawyer took a precise step back.
"Have I shoveled enough of the περιττώματα ταύρος you were planning to throw in my face?" Celestia politely asked. "Mazein criminal law isn't my specialty. But I can read, and I can listen when someone is trying to brief me. Illegal trespassing, so all of the evidence must have somehow been gathered illegally as well. Framing of the innocent. The wrong place at the wrong time. Some sort of Vast Pony Conspiracy and if you need a little help imagining the details on that, I know a few individuals who can create false connections with the best of them. I'm aware that the way the events occurred might lead to some of the charges being dismissed, if only to keep the judge from throwing them out of court. But others are going to be harder. Especially once the testimony begins."
"Your presence at the site is not explained," Mr. Heenan began. "Your testimony --"
"-- oh, I'll testify, when it comes to that," Celestia smiled. "About how Referee Moonsault taught me about red-tinge after a victim of it charged into her office and tried to kill her. How I was told about the plant and thought that as Mazein's ally, it would be nice of me to help find a cure. There can be more details later, if the circumstances warrant them. But for now, that's enough to build on. And it's not my testimony that counts anyway, really. It's that of your employees, Mr. Hold."
It only made him grin. "There won't be any."
"You seem rather sure."
"They won't talk." The arm spreading would have been more visually effective if both arms had been capable of movement. "Because there's nothing to talk about."
She nodded. "Likely they won't. Because they're just that scared, and they have so much to be scared of. Unless, of course, someone were to offer them immunity in exchange for their testimony."
"Lying about their best friend because the police scared them with false charges and they decided to save their own skins," Choke Hold smiled. "It's not that hard, getting a jury to hate a traitor."
"They wouldn't be the ones testifying."
The subtle emphasis got through, and the dealer tilted his head, waiting.
"Two members of your so-called test squad survived," Celestia quietly offered. "The ones who weren't healthy enough to be let out of their cells and join the reinforcements for the promise of bonus pay. The ones you just left to shiver on their pallets without medical attention. Once they received it... well, they're stable now. And quite willing to talk."
Choke Hold just kept grinning. Mr. Heenan blinked.
"I want their names," the lawyer said. "I am allowed to know who the witnesses will be."
"We're not approaching the trial phase yet," Celestia shrugged. "And I'm not an officer of this court. So I don't have to tell you anything. Names or locations -- which, by the way, is currently not in Mazein. It's a big world, and there are a lot of rather attractive places to recuperate in. Would you like to start taking guesses? Oh, and Mr. Heenan, how many years of legal experience do you have? Do you think it's more or less than all the time I've spent sitting as a judge? I'm no expert on your laws, at least when the subject turns away from trade -- but I know my own, and I'm willing to learn. Let's compare our schooling. Degrees. Time."
Another step back, limbs moving as if the joints were operated by clockwork. But still, the dealer's grin would not fade.
"Mr. Heenan," Celestia stated, "you are overmatched."
Choke Hold snorted.
"Get out of here," he told his lawyer.
The older bull stared at his client.
"I --"
"-- I wanted her here. I've got her. So let me talk to her. She's not gonna try anything, right? She's the good girl. I don't get to talk with good girls much and usually after I do, they're not so good any more. So get out."
"I wish to register," the lawyer stiffly said, "my official protest."
"I wish to register my horns up your -- look, why are you even still here? Get."
The attorney left, with the gears in his arms slowly grinding down to a near-halt as the door closed. They both waited until the last of the hoofsteps had faded.
"So there we go," Choke said. "Just you and me. Like I wanted." A nod towards the quartz. "They don't count. As long as they can't hear."
Celestia shrugged. "You and me, Choke. So... what did you want to say?"
"It's pretty simple," he said. "Now, Mr. Heenan there, you shook him up a little. Enough that I'm gonna think about getting a new lawyer. Don't ask what happens to the old one. But he still had some points. You didn't exactly follow a lot of procedures there, when you came in. Any. So there's a lot of charges I could get dropped, if I pushed hard enough. And it's not that hard to find three idiots for a jury. Or, just an expression here, scare them up... Still, you know, trials take time. And honestly, you've got me worried about those two on whatever this test squad thing is. Sounds like they were pretty sick. When you're sick like that, you could imagine all sorts of things and think they were real. Hard to believe anything they'd say. Days of sitting, listening to them remember dreams... boring, right? So let's talk, you and me. About deals."
She sat, slowly and deliberately, staying at the far end of the table.
"Again, Choke, I'm not an officer of the court," she said. "I really can't make deals in Mazein."
"You head up Equestria," he shrugged. "You've got influence. People wanna keep you happy. If you asked for something -- something little, like for me -- you'd get it. So I'm gonna offer you something. You'll take it. And then you'll tell them to call the whole thing off, let me go, and we'll both be happy. Everyone benefits -- and... everypony? That's the word? Sorry: only got a second-tier grade when they were forcing me to study Equestrian, and it's kind of been a while since I tried to use it."
The grin became wider and, for those who had no experience of him, for those who would have just been meeting a bull for the first time, perhaps in hopes of a high-paying job gifted to them when they were truly desperate, it might have even seemed friendly.
"What are you offering, Choke?" she asked.
"I like that," he said. "That you're calling me Choke already. Can I call you Celly?"
No. She waited.
He spoke, eventually. And if it was not for the words, it would have been a small victory.
"You don't like red-tinge," he said. "I guess I can understand that. Nasty stuff! I've heard the official warnings. And what with your friend getting a dose of it -- he's your friend, right? Sorry about your friend."
She said nothing.
"Yeah, you've got some reasons not to like it," he finally continued. "So here's how it works. You tell them to let me go. No charges. No time. I just head off wherever I want to. After speaking to a few people first, who'll talk to other people, because I don't know anyone at the end of the chain personally or whatnot. Really, I don't know much of anything, just ask my teacher for Equestrian. But let's say, purely on the hypothetical, that it works like this. Completely hypothetical, and it's your word against mine for anything I said here. No witnesses for the words, balancing testimony... you get me, right?"
She nodded.
"So, here's your hypothetical," he told her, and again leaned forward, as much as he was able. "You let me go -- or red-tinge comes into Equestria. Because I'm not the guy who can do it, but I bet there's a few out there who could. If they knew the market was there. They might just start opening up a whole new country. And, you know, unless someone talks them out of it..."
Her head went down. She stared at the cold floor for a while. She could feel the heat of his smirk.
"'And'," Celestia said.
That was when she laughed.
It was soft. More of a chuckle than anything else, a single, subdued "Heh." But it made Choke Hold sit a little straighter in his metal chair.
"...what's so funny?"
"Oh, it's all right," Celestia smiled, and chuckled again. "I understand. Second-tier grade, after all. I wouldn't expect you to be completely fluent. A little conjunction trouble..." More of a titter this time.
She'd known he would hate laughter: any joke which seemed to be on him. "I said, what's so --"
"-- 'You let me go,'" Celestia corrected him, "'and red-tinge comes into Equestria.' Because that's the real deal, isn't it?"
She raised her head, just in time to see him fighting to control his eyes. To keep them from widening, phasing into the first stages of orange. "I think I know what I --"
Celestia stomped her right forehoof, just once. He stopped.
"You asked for the good girl," she smiled, and began to stand up. "I understand that. I really do. Shortly after the Return, some people started to ask if they could deal with Luna instead of me. Because she's smaller, and so she has to be weaker, plus she'd missed so much, she had to be the easy target for a con. That stopped, and rather quickly. Because I let a few of them deal with her, and they found out that Luna doesn't make threats. A threat implies you might not follow through. It was... sort of nice, going back to the old system, at least here and there. I smiled, and I was polite, and just behind me was a tail lashing with flaring stars, and no one really wanted to upset that tail. But you asked for me, Choke. Luna showed you a little of herself, and a little bit more while she was slamming you into your buildings. So you went for me -- because you thought you were getting the pushover."
He looked as if he wanted to say something. He also looked as if he couldn't. Confusion warred with rage on his face, and the conflict quickly resolved in favor of alliance, slowly shifting the chroma of his eyes.
"I'm the good one," Celestia said as she slowly began to trot forward. "Aren't I? Isn't that what everypony and everyone believes? I follow the rules. I made most of them. And when someone like you comes along, whose only rule is to make sure he survives, they look at me and see somepony they can beat without even trying. Because I have to follow the rules. I read your notebooks, Choke. You believe yourself to be something of a scientist. You made up a theory, didn't you? Survival of the fittest. Which means anyone who doesn't survive didn't deserve to. I know you a little through your writing, and it was a refreshing read, really. A reminder. That some monsters walk under Sun, and a few of them wear minotaur skins. It's my duty to stand against the daywalkers. That's a rule I follow. But I'm bound, aren't I? By laws and traditions and customs and just having to be good. So if I made that deal with you, it would show you I was weak. There's no need to honor a bargain with the weak. You'd bring red-tinge into Equestria no matter what I did. Because I deserved it for being weak. Because you wanted revenge for being in prison, even for a little while. Because you might get some bits out of it. Because you're a monster, Choke, and you're not even one who's very creative about his excuses for it. And when it comes to a monster against a good girl... the monster wins."
Halfway down the table now, watching his jaw madly clenching with a fury which had nowhere else to go. Nowhere except those reddening eyes.
"You're right," she told him. "About the witnesses, I mean. Three minotaurs in the adjoining room. They can't hear anything I say, and the distortion of this particular piece of quartz means that if they have anyone who could normally try to lip-read, that would fail. They don't know what we're talking about, any of it, and in the end, it would come down to your word against mine. They only know what they see. So since we have privacy... I want to tell you some things."
She paused, just a quarter-body length away. Titled her head slightly, smiled.
"I know," she said, "that you're afraid of the other dealers. That they were after you because you didn't care how many customers you killed, or test squad members, or -- well, that you didn't care, let's leave it at that. It's how I know you're a monster, by the way. You're only a monster if you could potentially care and don't. But the point is, Choke, that I read your notebooks, so I know what your defenses were really for. And if you go to prison... that's where a few of their own caught ones live, right? I bet they'd do anything for a few favors from the outside. Such as taking out the trash. You have so many reasons to be afraid of prison, Choke... but why would you be afraid of me? I'm the good girl, and being good is what the weak do."
She couldn't repress the little sigh. But to be fair, she barely tried.
"Being good," she said, "is hard. There are times when simple politeness is the most excruciating thing you could ever do. I'm good by choice, Choke, and part of that is because I know what all the other options look like. But it's just you and me here, right? And you offered me a deal. I'm not taking it. But I almost have to respect the sheer level of monstrosity it took for you to try it, especially knowing you intended to watch ponies die the whole time. So I'm giving you something back. A few secrets to cherish wherever you're going, for as long as you last there before your Ancients gore you out of their house."
She took a tiny step forward.
"We have a cure for red-tinge. It's being spread around your hospitals as we speak. So it really doesn't matter what you do, not that you'll ever get a chance to try. Well, that's not much of a secret, is it? Everyone will know in a day or two. Let me offer something better."
His eyes were almost completely scarlet now. Muscles strained against the bindings, and the one free fist was clenched so tightly that it seemed as if it was collapsing in on itself.
Another step.
"Oh, here's one!" she smiled, and arced her neck forward. "Did you know that you can't keep control of a country for as long as I have without being just a little bit of a pragmatist?" The last step, and she checked her position before the last words were sent out to do their damage. "And it doesn't matter if your new lawyer somehow gets all the charges associated with the raid dropped. If every witness vanishes, if you terrify jurors and abuse loopholes and just try killing your way to freedom. Because there's one charge which won't be dropped. One individual you can't intimidate. You're going to prison, Choke, for visibly committing a crime in front of very reliable witnesses. And there's just one more thing you might want to know. It's not much of a secret, really... a few minotaurs know it, I'm sure. But it'll explain so much to you, especially about what you're going through right now."
She stared into the red of his eyes. The bulging muscles of arms and neck and chest.
"Unicorn magic," she said, "especially for simple physical manipulation of monsters -- can be hidden."
The bindings around legs and wrist broke, because she had told them to. The bull shot out of his chair and took a tremendous swing at her, because she would not allow his invisibly-constrained limbs to do anything else, any more than she'd allowed him to talk. She moved just enough to make the blow a glancing one, just something which would visibly bruise the flesh under her fur rather than shatter her jaw. And then Celestia seized his body in her surging, suddenly very visible field, because his body needed a reason for having her signature on it. She flung him into the wall and then, strictly in the name of that same reason, she hit him with the chair a few times. That was followed by wrapping him with the retied bindings, although that last part was mostly a formality, given that he was unconscious and the police were just about in the room.
She turned to them in open relief as the reinforcements stormed the area.
"He must have gotten a dose of red-tinge!" Celestia gasped. "I brought some of the cure with me just in case we found new cases in the area... breaking those bindings..."
"We'll give it to him," the oldest officer assured her. "Are you okay?"
She rubbed her right forehoof against her jaw. The bruise was coming up fast, but the tenderness seemed to have a good head start. "More or less."
"Assault on a Princess," the youngest snorted, reaching down to check the renewed bindings. "In front of witnesses. I'm guessing you'll be pressing charges? Please say yes..."
"Yes," Celestia said, and forced a pained smile.
In some ways, that was the end of it, at least for Choke. But there were other endings to deal with, and not all of them proceeded so smoothly.
"The suits?" Rounding Moonsault not-quite-asked them at the moment they got through the office's new door.
"Hoovmat manufacture," Luna said. "They have recently improved their product, although they are oddly reluctant to continue manufacture at such high standards. Still, it provided us with a supply which allows the wearers some true degree of safety when working with hazardous materials."
"Hoovmat," the Referee slowly said. "That was the pony in the article. The one it said you were using the tax system against."
Luna spotted her sister fighting back the wince. "You have seen the quality of our press, Referee Moonsault. He simply had a certain disagreement with us over money. He believed he should never spend any of it on his customer's desires. What of the suits worn by the growers? Have you located the manufacturer?"
"Not yet," the minotaur tensely replied. "We're looking."
"Well," Celestia noted, "there's certainly a market waiting if they want to come into the open. I expect Equestria to open up in about four years."
The Referee looked at them for a while, one to the other and back again.
"So you searched for the plants," she said, "because of what I told you. Because you were worried about us."
They nodded.
"How did you find them?"
"Magic," Luna said in the off-hoofed way of somepony who knew the plant-finder lie had galloped itself into the ground.
"What kind of magic?"
"I'm sorry if this sounds a little... well, pony," Celestia stated, "but it's hard to explain every last detail of a working to someone who can't cast. 'Magic' will have to suffice."
Rounding Moonsault stood up. Stared at them. Loomed.
"And that's pure coincidence," she said. "Your coming to Mazein on tour for the first time in nearly two centuries. Finding out about the flower. Finding them for us. Finding a cure. Just pure dumb luck, you both being here, right then."
"I am uncertain as to what else you would call it," Luna shrugged. "Incidentally, we still have two days of our tour remaining and we interrupted them to visit you once the request arrived. There is a rather fine wrestling match scheduled for this evening, and I would rather not miss it. Referee Moonsault, we are allies, Mazein and Equestria, the oldest allies still standing together in this world. Allies offer aid to one another when it is needed, regardless of whether anyone formally requested such. We helped you and should it ever be necessary, I hope that we can help you once again -- or that, as our allies, you will still come to our aid when the need arises. Would you attend the wrestling match with us? It has been quite some time, and I would benefit from the company of someone who could tell me the names of the newest moves."
The Referee didn't say anything for a full minute. Bandaged hands slowly unclenched.
"I went to see Rake this morning," she said.
They nodded.
"I yelled at him. For about an hour. And then I kicked him to the back of the debate queue. For starters."
Again.
"There's this rumor that you have a time travel spell," she said. "Something that allows you to spend about half a minute in the past, but you can't change anything. I'm guessing you're not going to confirm that."
Neither sibling risked the slightest degree of movement.
"So if I went back and screamed at myself for being stupid enough to date him, it wouldn't do anything."
Total, well-practiced silence.
"Just coincidence," she said, and slowly began to sit down.
That seemed to be worth a nod.
"I am," Rounding Moonsault steadily said, "completely certain you're both lying to me. Thank you for the cure, Sisters Invictus. Thank you for the lives of all those you saved, and accept my thanks on the behalf of all the Ancients who weren't expecting anyone to move in just yet. Please enjoy the rest of your tour. And get the bucking Tartarus out of my office."
They stood among the flowers, minotaur and pony, looking out over the blooms.
Torque sighed. The sound was odd, coming from inside his suit. "Sorry, Celestia. I know things are going to be strained for a while. Just know I'll keep things friendly on my end, okay? For as long as I can stay voted into the post."
"She's a good ageláda," Celestia observed, forcing her own breath through the filters. "And a very strong Referee. The first part... is actually what makes it harder. But we can't tell her everything. Not yet." Not when everything still involved a potentially huge problem.
"I'm not sure you've told me everything," Torque snorted, and Celestia had the grace to blush. "But in my case, I know better than to ask..."
The breeze rustled across seafoam. Neither could feel it against covered fur.
"The disease," Torque finally said, "comes with the cure. Which means we can't destroy the flowers. Both nations need to have a supply set aside, because even if we wipe everything out here, someone could come across a patch in another wild zone, and we have to be ready to treat the victims. That means deliberately growing them. Every nation might wind up needing them eventually."
"I know." The wince had mostly been hidden by the suit. "And we don't know how it manifests in the other species, so we can't send anyone out to look for specific cases. We just have to hope someone notices deep magic gone wrong -- and correctly diagnoses the cause."
"I'm not asking for volunteers to test the effects," Torque said. "We'd probably just find the one species where the pollen works and the root doesn't."
Celestia sighed. "Luna asked me to apologize for the intrusion, by the way. She usually doesn't go to minotaur nightmares, but she said your call was --"
"-- loud," Torque finished. "I know."
They stood under Sun, on a calm day where none of the warmth touched them.
"It's not much of a weapon," Torque said. "Use it on minotaurs and it'll make for the strongest army -- physically -- anyone's ever seen. Along with turning them into single-minded soldiers who might not be able to listen to any new orders. Like 'stop'."
"Use it on ponies," Celestia added, "and it'll provide stronger magic -- over several years, while potentially distorting the mind of everypony who took it until they're nothing more than trotting extensions of their talents. And in both cases, the people will effectively stop existing. It's not a weapon, Torque, although I think we're going to both be waiting for the person who's stupid enough to try using it as one. It's a horror. And it's a horror we'll have to live with, because without it, we can't stop it."
The big bull slowly knelt down, picked up the curved shovel. "I trust you," he simply stated. "I trust you more than some of mine think I should. None of this changes that."
She smiled, and hoped he'd seen the crinkling of the suit. "I trust my friends, Torque. I trust that you won't use them. You'll trust that I won't. And because we know we both could, neither of us ever will. Shall we?"
He nodded, scooped dirt into the first of two hundred waiting pots.
"One for you," he counted off. "And one for me. One for you..."
"So we've... finished with the last of the tests," Vanilla awkwardly began, forcing his eyes away from that one chart. "The minotaurs are all back to normal. A lot of them have muscle strains, and the ones who were in the end stages have hairline fractures of various bones: their skeletons weren't meant to deal with that much strength. But they'll heal."
Luna frowned. "You are stalling," she openly noted. "I suspected the news was not altogether positive when you asked us to come to your offices one last time. Although we were planning on -- well, we will discuss that shortly." That led to a glance towards Celestia, whose nod reaffirmed the agreement they'd spent most of the previous day arguing over. Luna suspected they were both hoping for that one argument which would talk them out of it. "So tell us what is wrong, Doctors. The minotaurs will be well. That implies..." and it was an effort not to close her eyes, with a somewhat more automatic one keeping voice steady and legs straight "...that the ponies will not."
Celestia sighed. "If there's bad news, I think we need to have it now. After all of that, after everything..."
"It's not bad," Chocolate hastily said. "It's just... weird."
Both siblings stared at him.
"Weird," Luna repeated.
"Very," Vanilla confirmed.
"What kind of 'weird'?"
The physicians risked a mutual breath.
"Pleasant and Rapture are normal," Vanilla said. "Physically and magically. They have a lot of missing memories from when the pollen was in effect. They've basically skipped several years of their lives, and... that's going to have an effect. It's not something we can treat." He sighed. "It'll be somepony else's job there, and it won't be an easy one. But as far as their bodies are concerned, they're where they should be. They're thinking clearly, or as clearly as somepony who's still dealing with the consequences of everything that happened could be expected to think. Rapture's -- been blaming herself a lot. She's the one who first spotted the flowers. But Pleasant and Joyous are keeping an eye on her."
"Magically," Chocolate went on, "is harder to measure. Especially for something as subtle as a normal talent. And it's not like they want to do any weather surveying right now, or maybe... for a long time. But I managed to talk Pleasant into a little of it, and sent the results to the Bureau. They were -- disappointed. They said it's expert work, but they want to know when we're getting their geniuses back."
"Which," Luna slowly said, "leaves Joyous. What is wrong, Doctors? Now."
They all waited for the last echoes of thunder to fade.
Vanilla's words did not emerge with indecent haste. Indecency had been pushed out of the way. "She's not normal."
"How?" a visibly pained Celestia immediately asked. "We were there, Doctors: her mark shone, as if she was going through manifest all over again, and when she woke up, she was able to turn her pheromone production off! We all saw it through the filter spell! How is she not normal?"
"Her magic..." Chocolate swallowed. "...it's under her control now. We talked her -- barely -- into experimenting a little. She really wants to just leave it turned off. And when she did use it on her own, she was trying to produce neutralizing pheromones. Canceling out what she'd already done. She also wants to figure out if she can deliberately exclude affecting somepony. We think both things might be within her capabilities, once she gets some practice. But..."
"...her strength," Vanilla gulped, "never dropped."
The mares stared at the stallions.
"We don't know why," Chocolate said. "We can only guess. Maybe it's because the pollen was in her body during manifest. Her parents had a normal level they could return to, the amount of power they'd operated with for years. But for strength of magic, Joyous' body doesn't know what a typical pony normal is. We're sure the intensification has ended, although we asked them all to come back for follow-ups regularly. She has the most basic form of control: stopping. And she's learning more. But her talent, when she deliberately uses it... she doesn't have to use it at full strength, even if she's still learning how to finely control that. But when it comes to the most she can do -- nothing's changed."
They all took a few seconds to think about it.
"She will live?" Luna asked.
The Doctors Bear nodded.
"I believe," Luna decided, "we can deal with the rest. Thank you, Doctors. For everything. And with that said..."
Celestia stepped forward. "You have been entrusted," she said, "with some of Equestria's greatest secrets. You know what we once were, and the same for Princess Cadance." The visit to the North had been on the previous day, a personal follow-up to all the scrolls Celestia had been sending. All was well, and some portions of Shining Armor's mane had begun to (unevenly) grow back. "That isn't something we tell ponies casually, Doctors." (Luna noticed that the trembling started with Vanilla's right front knee, and then watched the rest of the migration with some fascination, especially when it jumped bodies.) "Furthermore, you've been studying us. Samples of our blood, fur, feathers --"
"-- mane..." Luna automatically chimed in.
It got her a glare, and then the elder refocused her attention. "You know a lot. When you include the medical data, it's more than we've trusted anypony with in a very long time." (Chocolate's eyes were now actively beginning to search for extra exits, none of which actually existed.) "And so, in a mutual decision, we are asking you..." She looked at Luna --
-- who directed her glare just about straight up. "So it is for me to say."
"It was your idea."
Reluctantly. "You agreed with it!" Eventually.
The tones were starting to become cautionary. "Princess Luna..."
She just barely resisted the urge to stomp a hoof. "Oh, very well. Doctor Bear --" and a glance at the shaking other "-- and Doctor Bear -- we are reviving the post of Royal Physician. We wish for the two of you to fill it."
Luna watched them, and marveled at how two swaying stallions so different in build could physically balance each other off when their forms were leaning what had to be their full weight against each other. By all rights, Chocolate should have been driving Vanilla into the floor.
The diagnostician got the word out first. "...why?"
"Recent events," Luna told them, "have taught us that we need to know more about how our bodies work. We had reasons for avoiding investigations after the first nights, Doctors, and some of those still hold true in the modern ones. There is information which cannot be allowed to spread. But now, it is information we need to discover. We may be immune to many things. We might be susceptible to others. And we need ponies with us who can learn. It might avert the next crisis. It could simply teach us things we should have found out long ago. Either way, we wish for you to be the ones who conduct those investigations -- carefully. Under supervision. Doing no more than we allow, unless that crisis should come."
"Without sneaking into our bedrooms with extra needles," Celestia quickly added.
Luna had no issues with the additional requirement. "So. Will you accept?"
Vanilla fainted. Chocolate managed to rebalance himself just in time to keep from falling on top of his partner.
"That... usually means yes," he said. "We'll just double-check when he wakes up."
It was twenty minutes before the sisters trotted out of the office.
"So they will maintain their practice for a time," Luna said, "but slowly shift the bulk of their duties to the palace. I can accept a transition period. As long as we truly have their services available within a few moons."
Celestia nodded. "It wasn't a bad idea, Luna. I know neither of us is exactly looking forward to the tests, but as long as we're both going through them..."
Luna sighed. "He plucked my feathers."
"Chocolate got me too."
"Did he get the right feathers?"
"On the second try. You?"
"It required more than two. Let us leave it at that."
They kept trotting for a while.
"They are talented, though," Celestia noted.
"Oh, yes."
"And they try crazy things."
"Completely insane. Bottling air..."
A long pause.
"We need them where we can keep an eye on them."
"Yes. That was the general idea."
They met Joyous in the Lunar throne room, shortly after Moon-raising. There were no Guards present, and no duties were calling for either of them.
"The doctors want to see me in two moons," the beautiful pegasus quietly said. Freshly-preened wings stretched a little, and her feathers rustled. "And my parents. To check on us. But they think everything's going to be okay. And... I went shopping yesterday. I had... I had my mane done, and... I just talked to the manestylist. About nothing. For an hour."
"They're used to it," Celestia smiled. "Joyous -- before you go, there's something I wanted to say." Yellow eyes stared up at her. "I said -- back at that inn, I tried..."
"...it wasn't your fault," Joyous softly replied. "You weren't thinking right. You weren't... thinking much at all. So you just said things, hoping they would -- work, and... for what you said... they were just -- things. I haven't told anypony else about what happened. What you said. Not my parents, not the doctors, and... I don't think I have to tell anypony. Ever."
Celestia continued to smile, and wondered if any of the pain was showing through. "Thank you."
"There is something else," Luna said, and her horn ignited. Stars surrounded the small piece of paper resting on the cushions of her throne, then opened the lid of Joyous' new left saddlebag and deposited it inside. "Physically, you are well. The changes to your magic are something which -- I have confidence in your ability to deal with. But in the mind... both you and your parents have been through much. Lost much. That is the name and address of the best therapist we know of, one who can be trusted. I understand that you wish some time with your family, but -- please. I am asking you, Joyous: see her. All three of you. Minds also need healing. Will you do that for me? I cannot order you -- but I am asking."
The pegasus slowly nodded, managed a small smile. "I will. We will. I'll tell them when I get outside." A glance at the closed doors of the Moonrise Gate, which had two metallic pegasi mares waiting on the other side. "I know it's... not quite over. I've been trying to think of what I can even do."
It made Luna tilt her head. "Do?"
"Well..." Awkwardly, "I never finished school. I've been talking about that with my mom and dam. I have to take makeup classes, and I will, when we get back. But once that's over, I have to find a job. And... what does somepony whose talent is for being sexy even do?"
Elder looked to younger, found the other looking back, and both barely managed to stifle their first reaction.
"There are... occupations," Luna finally said. Much more quickly, "Yes. Occupations. Let us leave it at that for now. But I do not wish you investigating them just yet, and certainly not before you speak with the therapist for a rather extended period of time. And you always have the option of doing things outside your talent, Joyous. Things you enjoy. You are more than your mark. It can guide you -- but it should never think for you. I believe you of all ponies understand that in full."
She nodded, and the obsidian mane did beautiful things to the light.
"So what are you going to do now?" Celestia asked. "You said you'd take the classes when you got back. That makes it sound like you're planning on going somewhere, with your family. And with what you said about traveling..."
"They're -- going to take time off," Joyous replied. "A lot of it. The disease didn't take vacations or spend on anything that wasn't related to work, so they have money put aside. We'll just stay somewhere for a while, and -- Princess Luna suggested a settled zone we could try. Maybe we'll try living there, after I pass my classes and the therapist thinks we're okay. But before we do that... we were talking a lot over the last few days, and..."
The smile was truly beautiful.
"...we're going to Horaceland."
The sisters smiled, and the three simply stood there for a time.
"I know I have to go," Joyous finally said. "And..." Looking up again, awkwardness returned, "you did so much. For me at first, and then for the minotaurs and Doctor Bear. I thought... you were my last hope. My last chance for a life. But it's hard to believe in hope sometimes, after so much had already failed. But you... you helped me, you saved me, and I want to say thank you, I do. But it feels like -- words aren't enough. Like just saying 'thank you' could never be enough. So..." Hesitant, visibly summoning strength. "I was thinking about it, and..."
Her wings spread, flapped. She hovered in front of Celestia's snout, looking directly into purple eyes.
And then there was a kiss.
It was not a particularly skilled kiss. It wasn't quite a first kiss, but it wasn't all that far off either. There was a little too much bumping of nostrils, along with some rather awkward exhaling directly into the elder's snout. It was also rather brief, and might have been even quicker if not for the shock which had frozen the elder's hooves to the marble.
But there was a kiss and at the moment of that contact, a delicate scent reached Celestia. There was a little trill of excitement, and a moment of fantasy. But that was all.
Joyous flew backwards, smiled shyly, then turned towards Luna.
There was another kiss.
It was... not brief.
They were trotting down one of the longer hallways, heading towards the split point between Solar and Lunar wings. Celestia had taken the lead, mostly in the name of putting any amount of distance between herself and the smirking.
Unfortunately, it didn't do anything for the words.
"But you must not take it personally, sister."
She had been kicking back every possible reply for the last ten minutes. A few more wouldn't hurt, at least if she didn't count any possible damage from the inevitable slow grinding of her teeth.
"After all, there are simply some who are not particularly attracted to large mares."
Or the muscle tension.
"Very large mares."
Lots and lots of muscle tension.
"And I suppose there are those who do not enjoy shielding their eyes from the glare every time light touches their paramour's coat. Really, it is simply a matter of personal taste, combined with the natural desire to retain one's sight. I am certain you can understand that."
She thought about the minotaurs who had suffered hairline fractures. She was starting to understand how they must have felt.
"So simply because she spent at least three times the duration in kissing me than you... that is no reason to fret at all, Tia. Or be jealous in any way." Merrily, "Nothing to be concerned about. Just like the nothing which, rounding down somewhat, was the approximate time in which she stayed with you..."
Celestia maintained her silence all the way to the division point, then finally glanced back at her sister. "So what are you doing tonight?"
It produced a sigh. "I am still catching up. Our nation, to a large degree, went on without us. The paperwork did not. Yourself?"
"I'm just going to bed. It's been a long day." Her own piles could wait for sunrise, and would undoubtedly grow a few hoof-heights under encouraging Moon. "So just paperwork?"
"Yes," Luna nodded. "I am -- not exactly in a rush to seek out something real."
Celestia understood completely. "All right. I'll see you in the morning, then." And turned towards the Solar Wing, took the first hoofstep --
"Very well," Luna said. "Good night --"
The pause was deliberate. The pause was expertly crafted. An argument could be made for evil.
"-- Sunbutt."
And in the last moments before the chase began, Celestia considered the consequences of her upcoming actions. Thought about hooves pounding down the hallways, knocked-over artwork, the guaranteed panic of those staffers who could not see any degree of sibling squabble as anything less than a prelude to Nightmare. There would be shouts and screams and very likely several dunkings, accompanied by desperate attempts to keep Luna from getting at that one spot and winning what would inevitably turn into a full-fledged tickle war. It was possible that there would be damages and repairs costs added to gossip, oh, there was almost guaranteed to be gossip, but...
Celestia took a few careful, casual hoofsteps down the hallway. Getting a head start. And she rotated her ears back, all the better to listen for the gasp of outrage which would signal the start of the race. Because yes, there would be consequences, there always were, and it was impossible to predict what all of them might be. But there were many tasks which came with the thrones and not the least among them, certainly when practiced by Luna, was that which said the younger had the duty to take the elder down a few pegs every now and again. To remind her that no matter how much had happened over moons and years and centuries, she was simply a pony.
A duty which, as Luna oddly kept forgetting, went both ways.
She could feel the heat of her sister's smirk on her half-tangible tail. Risked one more step, and then one more...
"Good night, Crater-Ass."