//------------------------------// // Chapter 7 Disaster Line Down // Story: At War with the Army // by Clear_Skies //------------------------------// Lazy Company File - #032 Attempting to capture the true feeling of what it was like for the company to stand guard duty in the Everfree Forest, is easily written into one word. Discomforting It isn't to say, that the forest is dangerous...no rather, it feels unnatural, as it were. Do forgive me, to describe it is rather difficult. We are naturally creatures of magic, magic which runs through our bodies like the very life blood that keeps us alive, so you would understand that entering the Everfree proper, is like entering into a pool of ice water. It should be known, that Fort Everfree itself doesn't reside within the forest, rather, it borders it, courtesy of what was once Apple Family property. Captain Down Range saw to it, that plenty of guards were placed on duty to protect not only the town, but the construction workers who were currently tending to the fort. It was a rather easy feat, as curiosity itself, was enough to drive in plenty of volunteers wanting to get a peek at the goings on within the fort itself. Unfortunately for Bonjour, we were quickly going to be seen as quite the ghastly sight, especially those tasked with patrolling around the Froggy bottom Bog, in the name of security for the towns shyest residence, and bearer of the element of kindness. It is perhaps a benefit that she was once a known model, enough so that many of the soldiers took to assisting her in her tasks with some reserved amount of glee. --- Mrs. Bonjour has had the pleasure of having children, with children comes messes, something she has all to easily handled before, what she hasn't ever dealt with, is company of nearly two hundred soldiers, back from their patrol through the Everfree Forest, in a state that some purple haired fashionista would consider such a travesty as to feint on the spot. The Plaza manager had nearly resigned herself to the militarys' presence in her hotel. There was no denying the welcome influx of rental monies during a normally slack period, and the troops themselves had proved to be far less raucous and destructive than she originally feared. She even made an honest effort to muster a certain amount of enthusiasm in her mind for their residence. What progress she had made along those lines, however, faded rapidly as she observed the company's transports pull up to the front door late in the afternoon, disgorging what could only be described as "mudponies" onto the sidewalk, and not in the racially insulting way, but in a literal sense of the word. From the waist-or, in some cases, the neck-up, they were recognizable as the hotel's latest guests. From the "disaster line" down, however, any familiar detail of individual or uniform was lost in a coating of muck. As sticky as it looked, Bonjour noted that the coating seemed to lack sufficient adhesion to fully remain on its hosts, disturbing quantities of it falling in flakes and globs onto the sidewalk and, with apparent inevitability, the lobby carpet. "Company, halt!" The voice of the companys' commander, or, as Bonjour tended to think of him, the Leader of the Herd, cracked like-a whip, bringing the mud-encrusted figures to a complete, if rather puzzled, halt before the lobby's threshold. The hotel manager watched with some astonishment as D-Range, his uniform displaying the same dubious collection of swamp mire as his followers, squeezed through the ranks and advanced on to the registration desk with the cautious tread of one trying to ease over a mine field. "Good afternoon, Mrs. Bonjour," the commander said pleasantly upon reaching his destination. "Could you call housekeeping for me and see if they have...Oh! Never mind. These will do just fine!" So saying, he scooped up two stacks of the day's newspapers from the desk, manipulators extending from his hooves to help steady the pile. After balancing the stack neatly, he tossed a pouch of bits onto the counter. "Here...this should cover it. Oh, and Bonjour?" "Yes, Mr. Range?" the manager responded absently as she tried to figure out how to count the money without soiling her hooves. Delegation seemed the only answer. "Do you know if everything's set up in the main ballroom?" "In a way, sir. Yes. One of your sergeants thought it best if we also erected a divider to allow some privacy between sexes, and it was necessary to open one of the adjoining meeting rooms for additional space-" "Yes, of course," Downy interrupted. "But we're good, right?" "Yes, sir. If your wish, I'll inform them you've arrived." "No need, Bonjour. Thanks, anyway," the commander said as he began to retrace his steps toward the door. "Right lads! Listen up!" He waited patiently till the troops lapsed into silence. "I want the troops on point to take these papers and spread them out on the carpet between the door and the elevators. The rest of you, move slow and stay on the path as much as possible. Any extra papers are to be left by the elevators, and I want you to grab a handful to spread ahead of you as you hit your floors. We're not here to make a mess for the staff to slave over, so keep it to a minimum. Understood?" "Sir, yes sir!" "What's wrong with room service?" The catcall from the rear was greeted with laughter and a few scattered rude replies until Downy waved the company into silence once more. "Allow me to answer," he announced. "While we're guests at this hotel, there is a housekeeping service as well as laundry service at our disposal. I have also contracted similar services for us once we move into our new barracks." A wave of enthusiastic cheers rose before being cut short by another gesture. "However, I remind you that this is a privilege, and it is not to be abused. If it comes to my attention that the personnel of these services are being forced to deal with any unnecessary unpleasantness or are putting in extra hours due to laziness from anyone under my command, several things will happen." Downy paused for effect. "First, they will be paid a bonus commensurate to the work required. Second, the bonus will be deducted from your checks rather than included in the normal expenses I am covering. Last, those services will then be canceled and their work distributed among the company as additional duty until such time as I'm convinced that you lot appreciate their efforts. You may not be professionals yet, but you will conduct yourself as such. Do I make myself clear?" "YES, SIR!" "Aye then, now get up to your rooms and cleaned, then report to the main ballroom for-" A new eruption of catcalls interrupted the commander, though it was apparent that he was not the focus. Breaking off his briefing, he turned to see what had captured the company's attention. "Hoooo-eeee!" "Sun above, I can feel that heat from here!" "Boy's, we got a stallion eater here!" "How 'bout a kiss, doll?" Ace stood framed in the hotel door, though "stood" scarcely embraced the picture she presented. Her entrance came with the clattering of her hooves as she struck a diva's pose. Her expression held a smug smile of a rich baroness surveying her peasants. The most obvious reason for her self-pleasure, and the target of the catcalls, was her uniform. In place of her normally frayed and faded uniform, Ace glowed in a Gore-Tex jumpsuit of the purest midnight blue. The change from her usual rough-and-tumble look was stunning, and the contrast between her and her mud-caked admirers made her look like she just stepped off a recruiting poster...or a catwalk. Polished horseshoes shined as she drew herself up and fired off a parade-ground salute towards her company. "Ready in the main ballroom, sir! C.G. is currently in the last run of his own fitting." Downy would have liked to have feigned annoyance at having been upstaged by his First Sergeant, but he, like many of the other stallions, and a few mares, was having a hard time trying to keep unprofessional thoughts out of his mind as he examined her every curve. Clearly the sergeant had been unable to resist the temptation to show off her new outfit, and had seized on the excuse of reporting in to parade it in front of the rest of the company. Carefully calming his more basic instincts, Downy returned the salute. "Thank you, Ace. We'll be along momentarily. Tell Ms. Rarity Belle and her friends that the rest will be along shortly." "Yes, sir!" Again the flashy salute, which the commander was obliged to return before turning back to his company of soldiers. "Well...there went the surprise, get going, clean up, and form an orderly line where the sergeants tell you too, no rush, everyone will have their chance." His final words were nearly drowned out by a loud whoop of enthusiasm as the soldiers surged forward into the hotel, barely remembering their commander's order regarding the newspapers. Following in their wake, Downy saw Ace surrounded by a knot of soldiers admiring her uniform, or her, it was difficult to tell. "First Sergeant?" "Sir?" Ace broke away from her pack, leaving a few drooling wanders to stare. "Relax, Ace. The uniform looks great on you." "Only great? Sir?" she tossed her hips to the side. "Hmm, I guess great is alright." "Certainly." Downy replied, steeling is resolve. "I take it the designer team was easy to work with?" "Yes, sir. I'll tell you what, that Ponyvillian tailor has some skill, seems this is her first time doing a military commish." "Is it only Ms. Belle?" he asked. "I would hope not, two hundred troops is a bit much for just one mare." "Ahh don't worry Cap, she's got herself a small team assisting her!" came the answer. "The marshmallows got it pretty good to I'd say." "Marshmallow?" "You'll get it when you see her." Ace shrugged. "You oughta get yourself cleaned up, before you dry up and get cemented to the floor." "Right, as you were Ace, nice entrance by the way." Downy carefully saluted her. The commander watched her leave, then tiptoed over to the desk with the exaggerated care of a villain in a sitcom. "Excuse me, Ms. Bonjour?" "Yes, monsieur Down Range?" "There'll be a representative of the Apple Family coming to meet with me." he said. "If you'll have him directed to my suite for discussions, you would have my thanks." "Ahh, this would be monsieur Big Macintosh, would it not?" Bonjour watched as Down Range nodded his confirmation. "Ahh, impressive that one, I shall be sure to have the staff direct him accordingly." "Thanks." --- "I must say, the need for military fashion to have a singular color scheme does prove bothersome." a white mare sniffed, tossing her purple mane aside. "Oh, well as much as I would agree, you must admit...it is impressive when you see an entire column of them standing side by side." a younger more diminutive mare politely responded, adjusting a pin held within her two toned blue mane. "Oh dear, you're correct Coco, it is quite...well, let us say, it makes for a unique group identity, but still, I do think some edging of the cuffs, or texture would create more of a balance." came the reply. "I must say, it is a blessing that I do not have to work on anything as garish as camouflage though." "Eh, everything good Ms. Belle?" Rarity turned to face the voice that called to her. "Oh, M...er... Sergeant Ace, I must say, everything is going swimmingly. The troops are certainly conducting themselves in a polite manner, allowing me and my partners time to quickly fit, and move them along, I dare say, we shall have the rest of them finished by tomorrow afternoon." With a wave of her hoof, Rarity gestured to her armada of supporting seamstresses. "I was...rather surprised to have such...support waiting for me, do let Captain Range know that I am very appreciative of this opportunity." she said. "I never knew a military commission would be quite so... extensive, why, the appliqué's are certainly easy to work with, though I wish the Captain would allow me to...tweak the designs a little more." "Eh, sorry doll, but shiny bits don't do much more in the field, than to attract the eyes, bit the opposite of what you fashion folks would want...I guess." "Oh, but it is so drool, but still, let it never be said that I turned away a commission over my own personal differences." Rarity huffed slightly. "Besides, I'm certainly glad that I'll be having a bit more of my way with the dress uniforms. I do love how they seem to cut a sharp edge in their form, especially upon a well-shaped body." Ace couldn't help but notice Rarity throwing glances towards Bombast. "Easy there Queen, the new skin cuts nicely, but it don't do much for saving the personality." Ace said with a chuckle. "Oh true," whined Rarity. "So true. Coco, what do you think?" "Oh? Me? Well..." Coco paused for a moment to watch as Yasir and Dust Might entered the room. "I think the military certainly seems...friendly?" "Hah, yeah, if you join the right unit, else its hells bells!" Ace barked out with laughter. "It’s only been a few days, and our captain has been quick to get us into shape." "Oh...I didn't know...is it always so difficult?" "It’s the army, if it wasn't, it wouldn't be government!" "Well that's certainly a depressing thought." Rarity chimed in. "Eh, you got the Bloods family line holding control over it all, it’s why they ask for officer commissions, kinda makes sense when you think of it like that." "Oh...him..." the white mare groaned. “Well, that certainly does explain a few things." "Him?" asked Coco. "Nothing to worry about darling!" the mask upon Rarity's face quickly changed to something more upbeat. "Oh, if I remember correctly, you wanted to ask a favor Ms. Ace?" "Ahh yeah, bout that, keepin things on the low and all...the others and I...well we got to talkin." Ace gestured for the two to come closer before whispering. "See, the company, it just isn't a company without a patch, a mark to really pull us together!" "Oh, that sounds exciting!" Coco squeed. "It does, and I know just the pony to help us with a few designs, a friend of mine." said Rarity. "She's quite the reader of this lovely little neighponese graphic novels, I dare say, she's would probably have some fun helping us brainstorm a patch for you all." "Right, but you know, keep it quiet." Ace hissed. "The boys and girls really want to show the boss that we're willing to put ourselves out on the front for him, he's been doing a lot right by us, just hope it doesn't turn out to be a dream ya know?" "Well, I for one certainly find your captain to be quite charming, a bit eccentric, but charming." replied Rarity. "Though, he is the first Kelpie to come through Ponyville. Coco?" "Oh? Manehattan has a lot of business from them, they do like the water after all." "Hmm, I must ask Ms. Ace, but have you ever thought about modeling?" Rarity gestured to the mares overall stance. "You cut quite a figure...has anyone ever told you-" "That I look like Fancy's wife...yeah, more than enough." Ace shook her head. "Nope, won't find me struttin down a lane for pho-togs, sides, I don't have the business mind she does, course mom's always wishin we had traded places." "How so?" "Older cousin, if you'd believe it." "Wait...Fleur?" Rarity gasped. "But...but I've met her, she's" "Phrench, sure is, mother’s sis went to school there for fashion, mine went for business...and me, streets made me the tough gal that I am!" Ace spoke with pride, rubbing her sergeant’s stripes. "Don't make em like us, that's for sure. She might cut business, but I'll cut a hydra or two if they get in my way." "But, well, you're practically twins!" "I guess, if you think of it that way." Ace shrugged. --- "Big Mac, it’s good to see you again." Downy offered the larger stallion a hoof. "Pleasure." Came the curt reply followed by the gentle acceptance of said hoof in a firm shake. "So, Granny say's there's business, and AJ is a might too busy at the moment, so I'm here ta represent." "Certainly, as long as we're clear on what is needed, I think things should go to plan." The kelpie took a seat, gesturing to the opposing chair. "So, what's this about needing the army's assistance with apple collecting? I figure you all do well enough, and the numbers in the market speak highly of you all." "Sure, course AJ would say otherwise, then again, she never did like having to deal with all the fancy mathematics." Big mac drew out a pair of spectacles from his yolk, along with a few pages. "Now, just ta be sure, Granny had gone and explained to ya bout our harvesting, and more particularly, our most prized season." "Zap Apple, correct?" "Darn right it is, Zap Apples are what landed this town upon this here plot of land." Big Mac adjusted his specs as he glossed over the pages in hoof, then passed them over to Down Range. "Now, you'll find that Zap Apples have a quality to them, but even then, none are still more pure in their intensity, than a natural Everfree Zap Apple." "What's the difference?" "It's the way of the land itself, from soil, magic, weather," Big Mac ticked each matter off on his hoof. "And plenty more, all coming together to naturally imbue its apples with quite a punch." "So the forests...natural state?" Down looked to Big Mac who nodded." Just checking, so the natural untouched state of the forest, is what causes the Apples to grow differently? How does this involve my troops?" "Well, figure, if y'all are doin rounds throughout the forest anyway-" "Only up to the old palace of the sisters, what's left of it at least." "Eeyup, we figure, long as you’re trooping to and from there, you'd be able to watch over a few scouters and harvesters, figure being able ta pinpoint the main bushels, will allow us a chance at nabbin the apples." "Leaving the trees to continue growing in the forest then?" "Partially, figure, if we were to grow a few of the trees closer to your base, it would have the benefit of both the forts protection, and the Everfree's soil." "Two birds-" "One stone." "Hmm, now I figure most of the command would probably toss a big "N.O." your way." Down stroked his chin for a moment. "Course, I think it would give the troops a little bit more needed work on the job, don't want them growing soft." "Eeyup, last commander wasn't too keen on getting his boots dirty out in the marshes." "I figure it shan't be too much trouble to have the troops roving along and keeping an eye on your own, course I would ask something simple in return." Downy extracted a sheet from his desk drawer and offered it to Big Mac. "Reckon there was gonna be a bit of back scratchin." The larger stallion chimed. A few moments of examining the sheet brought with it a raise brow. "Openin of the Apple stock's?" "For investment, figure an endeavor like this requires good capital to make capital, something the troops invest in, even better if a special portfolio can be opened up for the company." "Heheh, well shucks, Granny said you were different from the other movers and shakers." Big Mac tucked the sheet away. "Course any contractual changes still needs Granny's signature, so things might will hafta wait till then." "Eh, you won't find me making a mockery of business, just hoof a message over to me when you can, and I'll be there to discuss anything more over in your neck of the woods." Downy replied. "Is there anything else ta discuss this fine afternoon?" "Well...I reckon there's one thing." "That is?" "What do you know bout my lil'sister and her gang of Cutie Mark Crusaders?" --- Lazy Company File - #036 It was quite an interesting evening to say the least. Captain Down Range had called together a company meeting in order to discuss a recovery plan in response to any Cutie Mark Crusading campaigns. The thought that a group of children could ever be so troublesome is, to me, laughable. Be it as it may, the Apple Brother had been kind in informing the Captain about the previous success of the original trio, and how it caused quite a turnout for new crusader members, not just in Ponyville mind you, but apparently all throughout Equestria. I dare say, it is very similar to the filly and colt scouts of Equestria, though with a focus of helping the lost find their way in life and thus their destiny marks, as the colts like to say. Hoofbooks on "Sap Cleaning" and "How to avoid your pyromania" seems to have appeared upon the newest supply roster.