//------------------------------//
// Chapter 4: Learning to Walk 
// Story: Red Vs Blue: Epsilon in Equestria 
// by The Sentient Cloud 
//------------------------------//

Ponyville Library:

“Dear Princess Celestia.” Twilight started out as she always did. “Today has been very eventful, and while I do not have a lesson on friendship to report, I do have some interesting news.”

She paused, waiting until Spike had finished writing.
“Today we were all surprised when Rainbow dash returned from weather patrol to report that a unicorn had fallen from the sky. Thankfully, we were able to get him to the hospital and have his injuries healed.”

Twilight paused again, and then continued.
“We were all shocked when he awoke. He referred to us all as horses, and claimed that we shouldn’t be able to talk. He had no understanding of magic, despite being a unicorn, and couldn’t recognise a Cutie Mark. Even more surprising, was that he seemed to be shocked at his own reflection, not able to understand why he is a pony. He also refused to tell us where he came from, only saying that his name was Church.”

Another pause.
“Me and my friends are very concerned, but the doctors at the hospital say that he is perfectly healthy, and because of that he cannot stay. He will be discharged tomorrow morning. Because this is so worrying, I have volunteered to let him stay at the Ponyville Library with me, but I have no clue what to do after that. I was hoping that you could provide some guidance on the matter. Sincerely, your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Is that it?” Spike asked, putting down the quill.
“That’s it.” Twilight said, looking away as Spike incinerated the scroll, sending it on its way to Princess Celestia.

“So is there anything else about him that you didn’t mention?” Spike yawned.
“No. He really hasn’t told us anything else.”
“And we’re inviting hi to stay with us?”

“Well…” Twilight looked out the window. “He’s obviously confused. I can’t just let him go out there, without anyone to help him.
“Yeah, yeah.” Spike started walking up the stairs to the ‘loft’ bedroom. “Well, I know who to blame if he steals all my gems.”

As Spike made his way to bed, Twilight couldn’t help but feel he could be right. What was she doing, inviting a stranger to stay with them? He could really be dangerous. He could steal from them, even hurt them.

But then Twilight thought back to the scene in the hospital, and how distressed the stallion had been. She couldn’t imagine somepony as disoriented and confused as that being dangerous.

With a little sigh, she turned to go to bed, hoping that she wasn’t making a huge mistake.


***


Canterlot:

Princess Celestia read the letter calmly, taking note of the Stallion’s name and odd behaviour.
“Never a normal day in Ponyville.” She murmured, smiling slightly. “How did they ever survive before Twilight arrived?”

The parchment rolled itself up, and floated off to one side, depositing itself in a small shelf dedicated to Twilight’s letters, even as another clean piece of parchment approached from the opposite direction, accompanied by an inkpot and quill.

The quill rose out of the pot, and started writing on the parchment, recording a carefully worded reply.
It took a couple of minutes, but eventually the inkpot and quill were gently lowered to the floor, the golden aura surrounding them disappearing.

Celestia looked over letter, making sure it was all sensible and legible.

She frowned, hoping that the note didn’t sound like she was disinterested, but then decided that Twilight would understand that she was simply busy.
And with that, she sent the message on its way.


***


Ponyville Library:

Twilight was awoken by a sudden green flash, accompanied by a burp from Spike.
“Spike, was that-”
“Here.” Spike said sleepily, tossing the message onto her bed, and then continuing to snore within six seconds.

Twilight eased herself out of bed, lifting the message in her magical aura and trotting downstairs, magically turning on the light.

Excitedly, she unrolled the scroll, and started to read.

‘My Faithful Student:

Thank you for taking the time to alert me of these developments. The news of a unicorn actually ‘falling from the sky’, is indeed very alarming. I advise you to continue on your own best judgement, and please keep me informed. When I have a spare moment, I will try to stop by and provide some advice.

Sincerely, Princess Celestia.’

Twlight dropped the scroll, feeling vaguely disappointed. She had hoped that the princess would have some actual advice to give on the situation.
Then again, maybe things were very busy at Canterlot. From what she had heard, they were still cleaning up after the changeling invasion.

With a little sigh, Twilight put the letter down, and went back upstairs to sleep.


***


Ponyville Hospital:

Church couldn’t sleep. It must have been after midnight, and yet he couldn’t fall asleep.

He was lying awake in bed, staring at the ceiling.
“Horses, horses, horses.”
Repeating it didn’t make it any easier to accept.

Church couldn’t stop asking himself why the Memory unit would construct a world like this, and why he was still in here. What were the others doing?

With a little sigh, he rolled onto his side, staring out the window through a gap in the curtains.
What was he supposed to do while he waited for the unit to open? What if the unit never opened? What if something had happened to it, and the others couldn’t open it – or if something had happened to the others?

“Fuck.” Church swore under his breath, not at anything in particular. Not the world, or the horses, or himself, but just at… everything. Everything that had ever existed, just working as one giant machine to stop him from being happy.

“Fuck.” He swore again, suddenly wanting to be out of the bed, suddenly feeling like the bed sheets were plotting to strangle him.
With one heave, Church kicked the bed sheets off him, throwing the loose edges over the end of the bed.

He paused for a moment, staring at his horse body, suddenly missing his robot body more than he had ever thought possible.
Church was about to look away, when he noticed that there was no mark on his ‘flank’. Unlike the other six horses, his was completely bare.
He stared at his flank for a few seconds, wondering why he didn’t have anything, before shrugging it off as something that didn’t matter.

After the contemplation was over, Church finally started to wriggle himself to the edge of the bed. 
“There is no fucking dignity in this.” He muttered, before rolling over and landing on his four legs.

Here was the hard part. How did horses walk? Was it one leg at the time, in a pattern, or did they lift say, the front right and back left at the same time? Church couldn’t even remember ever being around a horse before, let alone watch one walk. None of this was helped by the fact that his head was still suffering from the headache, which had receded to a very faint throb.

“Uh…” Church slowly twisted himself around on the spot, so that he had a clear space in front of him for walking – or falling. “Okay… How do I fucking do this?”

After much hesitation, he slowly took a deep breath, and simply told himself to walk.

Automatically, his left hind leg raised itself, followed by his left front leg, which was raised shortly before the first hoof hit the ground. This pattern repeated itself for the right side, and Church quickly realized that he was walking.
“Wait, what?” He raised both eyebrows as he slowly moved forwards. “That’s it? Really?”

Church looked down at his legs trying to pick out the pattern. “Wait, so-”
And just like that, he stumbled and then collapsed on the floor, face down, buttocks up.

“Fuck.” He grumbled, climbing back to his feet.
“Okay, don’t try and get the pattern.” Church muttered, starting out again.

It was impossible to not try and get the pattern.


***


Church dropped back onto the bed, rubbing his chin.
It had taken at lest eleven falls, each time landing on his chin, but Church had finally gotten the pattern.

He had no clue how to get the covers back on without fingers, but it wasn’t like the room was cold anyway.
Church looked down at his hooves, wondering why he knew how to walk. Learning to walk should have taken so much longer, and yet he had grasped it within thirty minutes.

“I…” He mumbled, suddenly feeling very sleepy. “I hate fucking everything.”

Church looked around slowly through heavy eyelids, sluggishly wondering how he could have been so alert just a few minutes ago. Sleep depravation was a powerful force.

He yawned, before closing his eyes, and falling asleep.