“What do you mean Twilight’s not here?” Train Wreck glowered as he stalked through ponyville, trailed by an annoyed Starlight Glimmer.
“Twilight’s gone to Cloudsdale with Rainbow dash,” Starlight rolled her eyes. “Friendship problem. Aren’t you supposed to be the equivalent of an alicorn yourself?”
“Dammit!” The giant clicked his mandibles in agitation, ignoring the pink mare’s question altogether. “What about Pinkie Pie? Noone’s terrified of Pinkie Pie.”
“Friendship problem with Rarity.” Starlight supplied, less than helpfully. “Although that was IN Canterlot, so maybe you could catch up to her when you get back there. And before you ask, Applejack is in Las Pegasus with Fluttershy.”
“I wasn’t going to ask, me and Applesmack ain’t buddies, and...wait a minute,” Train Wreck stopped short in the middle of the street, “Do you mean to tell me that all six of the Bearers of Harmony are out on ‘friendship business’.”
“So? “ Starlight moved around the behemoth and continued walking. “They’re busy mares. They can’t just break out the super rainbow attack every time something comes up!”
‘
“So, who do you love more? Me or your mother?” Filthy Rich demanded of his uncomfortable looking daughter.
“Uh, dad, I’m not really comfortable with…” Diamond Tiara stammered awkwardly only to be interrupted.
“Oh come on, every pony in town loves Filthy Rich, and you're gonna try and horn in on the one pony that has any love for me at all?” Spoiled Rich angrily interrupted her husband.
“Look, there’s real trouble in Canterlot here!” Train Wreck continued to argue, only vaguely aware of the strange conversation he had just peripherally witnessed. “Maybe you didn’t notice, but there was just a terrorist attack on the frickin’ Friendship Express!”
“‘Terrorist’? How is it yhumans already have words for these things?” Starlight fumed. “And of course I noticed. I’M the one who had to put that poor mare back on the train and then use my telekinesis to keep the whole thing from derailing because those rogue changelings unhitched the break car. I hope you had a relaxing walk back to town mister ‘hero’.”
“And as part of my campaign to become the most loved mayor in equestria, I hereby declare all taxes in Ponyville null and void!” A small crowd of ponies cheered as their mayor addressed them from behind her podium.
“Besides,” Starlight continued, “It’s not like Queen Chrysalis is invading. It’s just that stupid changeling that keeps stalking you.”
“Okay, I know you don’t take the Nopony seriously...” Train Wreck started only to be cut off.
“You’re right, I don’t” Starlight Glimmer huffed angrily. “Do you know why? Because I WAS a threat to all of Equestria. Iam Noone is just a changeling with a teleport spell. If his last ‘attack’ is any indication, he’ll do more damage to his own operation than he does to Canterlot. You’re acting like there’s an imminent changeling invasion, trust me, somepony would notice if changelings just started replacing ponies.”
“Oh, Ah know what your cutie mark means,” Applebloom smirked, “It’s means you're destined to be a spoonfed little rich brat who’ll never accomplish anything on her own!”
Silver Spoon, shrank back at the unexpected bullying.
“Hey, that makes perfect sense!” Sweetie Belle grinned, pointing at the little grey mare's flank. “A Silver spoon, just like the one everypony says was in her mouth since she was born!”
“Why are you being like this?” Silver Spoon cried, “I thought we were friends now! I thought you helped ponies find their special purpose!”
“It’s not our fault your special purpose is so lame.” Scootaloo sneered at the crying filly. “Look on the bright side, all you gotta do is keep sucking up to rich ponies who are better than you. Sounds like an easy ride to me.”
“Yeah, seems like ya got it pretty easy. No pressure to excel, just sit back and be spoon fed till you're old and fat!” Apple Bloom laughed.
“Besides,” Starlight chided as they passed the bickering fillies, “You’ve got you’re own changeling queen, no less than three alicorns, two of which raise the sun and moon, and you’re pretty imposing yourself. I mean, I just dropped you off the side of a mountain. That. Just. Happened.”
“I guess you're right, Starlight. I’m just so lost ever since…” The giant winged tazzle pony trailed off.
“”Hey, it’s gonna be fine big guy, you’ve got this.” Starlight Glimmer smiled warmly. “I’d help out myself if I could, but I gotta meet Trixie in the morning. We’re going back to m old town for the Summer Sun Celebration. They invited me back, and I’m… kinda terrified.”
“Don’t sweat it,” Train Wreck smiled, drawing an involuntary flinch from Starlight, and pretty much anypony in line of sight. “Like you said, I’ve got this. I just gotta figure out how to get back up the mountain. It’s a safe bet that the trains are down...”
“Well that I can help you with,” Starlight grinned, “Twilight and I have been doing long range teleportation drills lately. I can get us both to the edge of Canterlot in one jump. I’m not sure how much you weigh, but I’m pretty sure it’ll beat Twilight’s record. Seriously, it was easier stopping the train, than holding you in the air. I’m just glad you gave me a good excuse to drop you on purpose. You know Trixie is married right?”