"There is no way those can be real," Bon Bon gaped as she covered Twist's eyes.
Lyra, who was doing the same with Henry, nodded and made a face. "The largest I've ever seen on a mare would be Milky's, and they would barely make a B-cup on a human. But... that's just grotesque. If it is natural, she'll want to see a doctor about a reduction. She'll be in a wheelchair before long if she doesn't."
"Maybe it's one of those inflatable implants I've heard about," Noteworthy commented in a lost tone as he stared wide-eyed at the mare passing in the distance. It was almost impossible to take his eyes off of what he was seeing. Then his face was forced to turn by a tender hoof until he was nose-to-nose with Bon Bon. He smiled nervously. "uh, oops. Sorry, love."
She just rolled her eyes and kissed his nose. "Com'on big guy, as if I'd be upset with you for just looking at a mare. Besides, if she wants to parade about like a freak, than she deserves to be stared at like one. Let's just hope it doesn't become the hottest trend in Canterlot. Like, remember that ginger root craze? Poor Rarity, couldn't sit down for a whole week."
"It does tend to become a little messed up here every now and then," Lyra commented as she uncovered her colt's eyes once the odd mare had walked out of sight. "The last time I saw something like that was in a rather indecent binder. Not telling you who drew them, but, it made that mare, just now, look quite petite."
"That is why I have no desire to do any kind of job that requires talking with strangers about their private lives everyday," Bon Bon replied with a shudder at the thought of what Lyra might have seen and heard during her time in that office of hers. "Give me a few zombies and an insane cult of vampire necromancers any day. Until then, I'll be a happy little candy-making housewife."
"One of the many things you just get used to," Lyra shrugged, as she began to trot off ahead of the herd in search of a carriage. Her herd. That was still something she was getting used too. Not to mention it was only yesterday she'd signed the contract.
Yes, indeed, this was the very next day after Pinkie's cleverly planned event. Despite Lyra really wanting to move straight towards "dessert", and Noteworthy being okay with that, Bon Bon had insisted that they meet with Lyra's family first. Whether or not they received their blessing for the union, was beside the point. It was just the proper thing to do before she let her stallion sleep in the new wife's bed.
Though, despite the nature of the visit to Canterlot, both the mint mare and her new son were quite excited.
Well, Henry didn't really seem to know what was going on, as he was too excited about riding a train for the first time in his life and seeing someplace new. It was incredibly exhausting just watching him run about the car, trying to explore every nook and cranny, while at the same time looking out the windows at the passing world. But, despite his energy, Lyra always seemed close by in case she was needed. And to give death glares and threats to anyone who dared badmouth her little boy. He wasn't really bothering anyone, hardly noticed them actually, was more interested in the bolts and panels that held the locomotive together.
It was nearly evening by the time they had arrived at a large mansion surrounded by a high brick wall with an iron gate. No pony was at the gate to unlock for them, but Lyra, after stepping carefully from the carriage that brought them there, kept on approaching at a steady pace, her smile broad.
"Uh, Lyra," Noteworthy called out to her urgently, "You're about to walk into..."
The gate swung for Lyra, who turned about and smirked at them all. "Don't worry about it, it recognizes me. Now, get your plots over here before it closes."
The front door to the mansion was rather ominous, compared to the rest of the brightly colored Canterlot dwelling. Aged dark oak with textured iron fixtures and a large knocker in the shape of an angry mare greeted them all. Twist scooted behind Henry at the sight of that scowling figure.
"Hey, Notes, think you could knock for me?" Lyra asked with a meaningful gesture.
"Don't you have a key to your family house?" he asked her in return.
She nodded and tapped her horn. "Yeah. But the doctor says I can't use magic for a little while yet."
"Unicorns," the stallion muttered as he stepped up and grabbed the knocker. It banged so loud it startled everyone, except Lyra, and it's echoes resounded inside the house.
"Well, that should have alerted someone, don't you think?" Bon Bon exclaimed with a mild cough of shock.
Sure enough, she was right.
"Go away. We don't want any magazines, newspapers, pamphlets, salesponies, solicitors, gold diggers, Jehovah's Witnesses, politicians, nobility, third-party representatives, elder gods, or traveling minstrels," a voice shouted from inside, accompanying the sound of stomping hooves. "Unless you've got a Fisher-Price seal of approval, have an invitation with you, are a princess, or direct representative thereof, or are selling filly-scout cookies, you had better be gone by the time I open this door."
Not really given enough time to get off the property, the door swung open to reveal an irate earth pony mare in a maid uniform. The foals quickly ducked behind Noteworthy, as he was the largest of the adults. Then the mare's eyes landed upon the unicorn.
"Young Mistress Lyra?" she gasped, her scowl turning into a big grin. She lunged forward and hugged her. "Oh, it's been so long since you've been home. You parents will be so happy to see you back. Now, stop standing out in the cold. You could have just used your key, you know. there was no reason for you and your friends to wait for me."
"Actually there is, Bouncing Betty" Lyra said as she and her herd walked past the threshold and into the main hall of the mansion. She pointed towards her horn. "I kind of overexerted myself a week or so ago, and I'm not supposed to use magic for a little while longer."
The maid gasped and looked at her pityingly. "Ah. But you are so good with magic. It must be awful."
"Well, eating pie is a little messier," Lyra commented with a shrug. "But, other than that, I've been handling it just fine."
"If you say so, dear," the mare said turning to head up the large flight of stairs directly across from the door. "I shall inform the master and mistress at once, and then fetch you some honey and tea. Would your guests like anything?"
"Oh, no," Noteworthy said, shaking his head. "We don't need anything."
"No need to trouble yourself," Bon Bon agreed with a quick nod.
Lyra was not of the same mind. "Don't listen to them, Betty. Just get whatever you think is good."
"A wise choice, young mistress."
"Um, thank you," Bon Bon said, after the maid had vanished to the upstairs. "We didn't want to offend her by asking for anything... well, common."
"She'd gladly whip you up a couple cheeseburgers(1) if you asked," Lyra chuckled and rolled her eyes as she took a seat upon the floor and inhaled deeply through her nose. "Ah. It feels good to be back here."
"Um, while we're waiting," Noteworthy began, clearing his throat and taking a seat beside the good doctor. "I've only really read about your parents' background and stuff. We don't know what they're really like. So, would you mind telling us what to expect?"
Lyra smiled and held up a hoof as she twisted and ear about. "Well, mama's like this..."
"My baby's home," a voice cried loudly from the balcony above.
All eyes turned in time to see a female thestral leap over the railing and glide straight for Lyra. Upon collision, both mares rolled across the floor in tight hug, squealing for joy all the way. The thestral kissed the unicorn's face enough times to make a hundred colts gag and cry cooties.
"Oh, it's been so, long," the older mare cried as she picked herself up off the floor and began dusting herself off, not even noticing the looks the other ponies were giving her. Though, it wasn't because she was a bat pony. "Your last letter was about a month ago. It's taken all I've got to keep your papa from rushing off to Ponyville in search of you. What gives, Lyra?"
Lyra too was staring at her mother. "Before I answer that, mama. Why are you wearing a leash? And what's with all the... rope."
"It's called 'shibari', dear."
* * *
(1) Vegetarian for herbivores, and a beef substitute for carnivores.