Plague

by Even Evil Has Standards

Dennis Hopper (1936-2010)

Pinkie Pie watched in horror as Witch King levitated the cage containing her hogtied friend. She couldn't believe that same horse used to be the green colt she had a crush on. Even after everything that had happened, she would never have expected Percy to get this angry for her sake, let alone THIS angry. She also couldn't understand why he would still want to be her friend, even after all she did. Pinkie Pie decided to go back and search a few memories.

A few years after they set Thomas adrift, most of the Ponyville denizens had moved on (sans Twilight). Percy had moved into Sugarcube Corner where he would help Pinkie Pie and the Cakes. On their days off, she would treat him to shakes outside at one of the tables.
It just so happened that one day Lyra Heartstrings and Bon Bon were sitting adjacent to them. "But Bon Bon, humans do exist," Lyra was saying, "Why do I have to stop going on about humans? They were my favorite stories as a filly."
"There was nothing wrong with liking them, but you heard one too many. Nowadays, you're STILL taking it a bit too far because you're acting like a filly. Honestly, don't you think you're a little old to believe in human tales?"
"Human tales?" Percy seemed to appear between them as if from nowhere. "Humans don't have tails." He got up on his hind legs and did a little...demonstration. "They have big, big bottoms that they wear with bad shorts. They walk around like this going 'Hi Helen!'"
Pinkie Pie couldn't help but laugh, he looked so cute.

A few months before Pinkie Pie had her nightmares, she and her four friends had invited the seven Steam Ponies to their picnincs. As they were enjoying a few of Granny Smith's muffins when Pinkie Pie began to explain her Pinkie Sense.
"How does it work?" asked Percy.
"Twilight tried to figure it out once," said Pinkie Pie, "and she went car-razey. Let me tell you a little story and it's all about-"
This surprised the Steam Ponies, except for Percy. "What are we dealing with? What are we dealing with?"
"Humans."
"WHERE?!? NO! NO! NO! LUCY!" Percy went onto the ground, cowering.
"Don't worry, Percy-wercy." said Pinkie Pie. "No scary humans here."
"They're long gone." said Rainbow Dash.
"Vanished." added Rarity.
"Definitely extinct." said Applejack.
James coughed. "Actually, that's not true we come from."
"Yeah, there's masses of homo sapiens on Sodor." said Percy. "In fact, why don't y'all ruminate whilst I illuminate the most hilarious of them all?"
"May he rest in peace." sighed Pinkie Pie. It may have been odd, but Pinkie Pie noticed that on "Why lookee here!" there was a wedding cake.

That tore it. Pinkie Pie wanted her friend back and golly Bill was she going to. She marched right into the fray and stood between the two. "Let her go!" she ordered.
Witch King looked at her. "The last words she spake was to break her ties with thee. T'will be a very short time span before the others follow suite." He turned his head in the direction of the ponies. Although he didn't have any actual eyes, they still found it menacing...except Rainbow Dash.

"Bull!" she shouted, joining Pinkie Pie. "I have the best reason to break my friendship and I won't do it! She had a very good reason to do what she did as well a one for why she couldn't tell the others. YOU should've known that!" That was directed at Applejack who hung her head (if she could. "Besides, I'm the Element of Loyalty. I would never ever EVER abandon my friends. So what I'm saying is that," here she gave the poor pink pony a hug, "I forgive her."

Surprise rolled off Witch King in waves. But even he wasn't expecting Apple Bloom to follow Rainbow Dash. "She led me astray because she was led astray too. Ah might not get over this, but friends stick to each other to the bitter end. So ah forgive her too."
"Me three," Emily joined in.
"Make it four," added Edward. Slowly but surely, the rest all walked up and stood between the wraith and Applejack.
"And if you are really are my friend Percy," finished Pinkie Pie, "you're going to let Applejack go."
Witch King glowered at her. Then he turned to Applejack. After a while, he growled, "Very well if it is thy request." His horn glowed and Applejack was free. "Now I will return from my search for the Chaos spirit. Thou wilt have thy green friend back then." He flew off, leaving stunned ponies and a very traumatized Applejack.

Thomas and Twilight continued to trek along the rocky ground. It wasn't easy; the ground seemed to prick their hooves as they went. "Oh my aching hooves!" groaned Thomas. "What the heck are these things?"
Twilight levitated one closer to her and peered closely at it. "Enameled crystals," she said. "Sombra must be nearby. Be careful."
They struggled on onto they came to a firey orange river. "What is this?"
"This is the river known as Phlegethon." explained Twilight. "It's one of the first things ponies encounter when they try to leave Tartarus. Rumor has it that even a lapful will make a pony stronger."
Thomas groaned. "The name sounds like an event in the Great Railway Show: go into dirty sidings and shunt out dirty freight cars."
Twiilight let out an exasperated sigh in response and touched the river with her tongue. Seconds later, she crumpled and fell.
"Twilight!" shouted Thomas. He started to shake her until he felt himself freeze.
"Try...some."
Thomas then felt less rigid. He glanced over at the river before repeating Twilight's action. He tipped over; it felt like his insides were on fire. Then, the pain was gone as quickly as it came. "How do you...feel?" asked Twilight.
"I feel...tingly." said Thomas. "Like I can take on anything. LIke I can lift the heaviest boulder."
"Good, now let's get going. We'll have to cross the river so we can-"
An explosion cut her off. The Phlegethon erupted like a Las Vegas water fountain, only hotter. When it calmed down, a stange looking pony stood in the middle. He wore apocalyptic clothing and had a sea green right eye. His left one was overed by an eye patch and and a bit of his left forehoof was missing. His mane resembled a crown and he seemed to have a breathing problem because every so often, a gas mask would appear and he would breathe through it. "If you want to pass, you will have to go through me."

"And who are you?" demanded Thomas.
"I am Death Head, guardian of this river. Attendent to the king of the Underworld. *"
"And we have to get pass you to get across?" asked Twilight.
"Unless you have a hearing problem, yes."
"Then think fast." A flash of purple light and Twilight was gone. The horns on Death Head's mane glowed. In an instant, Twilight was there beside him. There was a problem: her wings were bent at an odd angle and she was panting. Her purple (or lavender, take your pick) had a grey tinge to it and there was something on her chest. Thomas took a closer look.

"A BOMB?!?"
"Yes."
"Why you..." Thomas fired beam after beam at Death Head who teleported each and every time. "She's a good mare!"
"Shut the buck up." Death Head fired his own beams. Thomas teleported with equal stamina.
'I must be picking these up.' He thought. He found Death Head looking at him with a weird looking bazooka. "What the...?"
"My devolution gun." Death Head fired his gun. Thomas lept out of the way. As Death Head re-aimed his gun, Thomas ran over to Twilight. "Ohdarn, ohdarn, ohdarn, ohdarn!" He never had experience with bombs before (for obvious reasons). "How do I stop this?"
"You don't get it do you?" Death Head was by his side. The beauty of it. It's made to explode. That's its meaning, it's purpose. You're trying to stop it for who? For what? What's a bomb that doesn't explode? A cheap. Gold. Watch."
"You're crazy, you know that? You're bucking crazy!"
"What? You think that when you emerge from here with your marefriend's wings, you'd get a metal?"
"Awdry," grumbled Thomas. His horn ignited but Death Head punched him and gave Twilight a kiss. A deep kiss. A long kiss. A long sultry, ok seriously, let's move on.
"Death Head...please," panted Twilight.
"Don't say please, kid!" snapped Death Head. "Why?" he looked at Thomas. "What do you to see in her? What does she in you? Why pick her? There must be plenty of engines for you to be "steaming" after! Why her? An engine and a pony? That's barbaric! Why do you two want to be together? WHY?!?" Thomas thought for a moment.

"Maybe it's because we do have SOME similarities SOME ponies don't even care about. But she does things that involve friendship. You know what friendship means? It means that someone or somepony is always watching your back. ALWAYS! Friendship doesn't require anything more, give or take a few sacrifices. Love is more advanced. Two beings want each other because they LOVE each other. But no one, and I mean NO ONE, can comprehend love. But then what do I know? I'm not even a real pony. Just a tank engine."

"And...underneath all that...hard metal...a big soft heart," wheezed Twilight. "And...that's why...I'll love you...always."
They both looked at her...and Thomas inhaled. Instead of looking sickly and wearing a bomb, Twilight was looking whole and wearing, "Blue velvet."
"What?" asked Death Head, then, "Oh no. oh no! You can't mean-"
"Oh yes." sighed Thomas "Blue Velvet." With that, he started to imitate Bobby Vinton.
Death Head couldn't stand it. That song...that very song from his early days. Those days when he was living. Those were the days. He missed those days. He teared up. He couldn't help it. While he was blubbering, Thomas was able to levitate Twilight over the river. The bomb came lose splashed in and sank from sight. Death Head heard it. "Wha...?" He saw Twilight on the other side; his eyes narrowed. Then he turned on Thoamas whose horn was still lit. "You..." He roared in anger and the river went up again.

Thomas found himself on Twilight's side of the river. "Thanks."
"Don't mention it." panted Twilight. "About earlier-"
"Let's worry about that later," said Thomas. "Let's worry about getting out of...here." Over yonder, was some fire, and it was forming into something. it read:

Thomas scratched his chin. "What kind of question is that? Well...first, I'd have to figure out what bus it's on. WHAGH!" The fire boomed again, leaving one, ashened word:

Then it sank into the ground. "Huh." said Twilight. "Mind if I...?"
Thomas knelt down. "Does this answer your question?"
Twilight gratefully got onto his back. As they parted, a voice could be heard from the river, hissing, "If I ever see him again, I'm going to cut open his head and I'm going to eat his brains."