//------------------------------// // 001 // Story: Secret Service: Operation Anthropology // by Kaliann25 //------------------------------// AnthroCon, Fillydelphya stadium; Friday 11:39 am Humans, truth of myth? Old and fake mythology for most of the ponies but still their tales still fascinated the ponykind since always. And for once a year the ponies who really believed humans coexisted in their world with them could be themselves without being judged and that day was today: the AnthroCon. A pretty famous event where fans of anthropology could share each other’s theories, buy some products and of course interact with the greatest personalities in the Anthropology field such as doctor Lyra Heartstrings, the greatest of the greatest. At the time Lyra was in her dressing room preparing for her big conference… and for something else, something more important and classified. It seemed like the usual conference about paranoid fantasies (as Lyra called everything related to humans) but in fact it was a distraction, they received an information that a terrorist group planned to take hostage everypony attending the AnthroCon and of course the Secret Service won’t allow it; and as part of the most secret military unit in Equestria Lyra was ready for everything and everypony. When she finished combing her mane she just took an earring and activated the secret transmitter. “Here agent Heartstring in my way to my position. Thirty two seconds. Girls?” In her console, the famous DJ-P0N3 Vinyl Scratch began to play ‘the wub’ as she called it. “How are you AnhtroCon? Ready for the main attraction? This if for doctor Heartstrings, I think you all know it, right?!! Come on, EVERYPONY SING ALONG!!” And she played the AnthroCon theme, sang by doctor Lyra Heartstrings herself: Anthropology. The crowd shrieked excitedly while Lyra nodded, that was the signal she agreed with her unit. Showtime! Lyra walked slowly to the stage and everypony (including Vinyl) muttered when she appeared and walked to the mic prepared just for her. After taking a small sip from a water bottle prepared for her, Lyra simply began: “Hello everypony, as you all know I’m doctor Lyra Heartstrings and I know humans exist” Cheers and more cheers. Lyra nodded and raised a hoof calling for silence again. One more time the excited crowd muttered and she simply took a small remote control and showed a slide of a well-known mirror in the world of anthropology. “As you all know this mirror is some kind of gate to a parallel Equestria, a ‘mirror version’ of our own world but inhabited by our human-selves. Yes, it was an important day on our field when we finally demonstrated we were right… but what if that isn’t the only human world? What if there was another human realm that has nothing to do with our human-selves but is still somehow connected to Equestria?” The crowd began to talk among themselves when Lyra passed to another slide showing an old newspaper FrontPage about a strange event from sixteen years ago where several beams of magic crossed all over the sky showing what it seemed like an unknown landscape in the sky. As a secret agent Lyra knew it was only one of Nightmare Moon’s attempts to free herself before the right time comes but of course the anthropologists believed almost anything. “Here, sixteen years ago a magic outburst from who-knows-where created several warp-holes to an unknown real; a human realm I think…” More and more excited mumbles around the crowd when suddenly a scream of pure madness and anger called everypony’s attention. Octavia Melody took a knife and pulled the nearest security guard from his shirt and began to shout in her nonsensical madness: “WHERE ARE YOU? WHERE ARE YOU HIDDING YOU PINK PEST? This whole time you’ve been bothering me and now that I want to kick your rump you disappear… come on, fight like a mare Pink Pest… FIGHT OR I’LL KILL EVERYPONY UNTIL I FIND YOU!!” Everypony walked backwards in fear, Octavia had a creepy smile on her face and her pupils somehow shrank to the size of two buttons. She was mad, completely mad. “Still not showing yourself? FINE!” And just like that she cut the security guard’s throat and began to scream in madness starting a massive evacuation. At the end the only ponies remaining in the stadium were a group of fifteen ponies dressed in black and seeming genuinely confused, Vinyl, Octavia and the deceased security guard. “What just happened?” Asked the leader of the ponies in black. Octavia’s mad face went back to normal. “It’s easy, in the name of the Secret Service you’re all under arrest!” “This was a trap!” The ‘dead’ security guard stood, showing it was no other than Bon-Bon who cleaned the raspberry jam from her uniform. “Indeed it was. Surrender now” Half of the ponies in black tried to escape for the main door but Bon-Bon took her spy-weapon: several super-sticky candies that she threw and they all got trapped. Another group tried to take Lyra as a hostage but she quickly got rid of them with her fighting skills. “Who do you thing I am? Do you really believe I’m into this nonsense of humans?” She asked cheerily. Finally the last five ponies tried to get the emergency exits but they were stopped by Vinyl and her laser-glasses. It was over, the Secret Service captured them all. “Mission accomplished!” Smiled Lyra. “Not bad being your first time leading a squad!” Complemented Bon-Bon. “Thanks!” “It was actually pretty cool, so, wanna celebrate on the train back home?” “Sound great for me!” And the four spies reported and went back to Ponyville celebrating a small ‘success party’ on the train. This was the life of the Secret Service, the most secret agents of Celestia’s most secret military unit; and they were happy to serve Equestria even if nopony knew. Once they arrived to their hometown, the two couples separated and went back to their respective homes, again they were happy to be secret agents. “You know Lyra? It’s pretty convincing when you start talking about humans, I actually believe you believe what you’re saying” chuckled Bon-Bon when they spotted their house. “I’m an artist inventing nonsensical stupidities what do you expect love?” Said Lyra proudly. They kissed and entered to their home where they were greeted by Princess Celestia herself. “Dang it, you startled us your Highness. What can we do for you?” Asked Lyra. The Monarch of Equestria dedicated the two spies a small nod and smiled warmly. “It’s complicated agents, first of all congratulations for your first time leading a squad agent Heartstrings. Your arrest saved countless of innocent lives. Next, agent Drops, do you mind if I talk to your partner alone? Bon-Bon nodded and went upstairs after dedicate Lyra an encouraging smile. The minty unicorn sighed and smiled shyly to Celestia. “Why do I have the feeling I messed up?” “Please calm down agent, I’m just curious about the article you chose for the distraction. Of all of the other articles, why that in particular?” Lyra shrugged innocently. “I can’t really tell, I was looking for some article that could help me inventing something convincing enough for the anthropologists and suddenly I jumped into something written the same day of my birthday. Is not big deal! “And you made an excellent job agent, I was just curious” Lyra made a firm military gesture to Celestia and bowed to her. “Princess as an elite soldier I was just following orders. Now your behavior is telling me that article is more than it seems, it’s okay, I also can see is something I don’t really want to know so don’t worry. I promise you I won’t look forward, I a soldier and I am loyal to the Crown until the end” Celestia smiled to her, “Thank you agent Heartstrings, I never doubted you but I had to be sure” “Whenever you need your Highness” Celestia teleported away and Lyra went upstairs to meet with Bon-Bon in bed. “Ey, what happened sweetheart?” “No big deal, apparently the article I used for my ‘new discoveries’ was more than it seemed and she came to make sure I won’t look forward. And as a loyal soldier I told her I neither know nor care. Just following orders” “As the way it should be. For a second I thought you ran into trouble” Smiled Bon-Bon. “No, a small mistake. No big deal darling” Location unknown; Sunday 10:45pm “So boss, what do you think about Doctor Heartstring’s conference?” Asked a pony looking to the brochure he grabbed at the AntrhoCon. The boss, a green earth pony with blond mane and a Cutie Mark of a can of peas just examined it. “It’s a shame she was interrupted by that wacko, but at least she proved she know the essential. Both Doctor Heartstrings and I are completely sure that day was crucial for Equestrian history, but still she doesn’t know as much as we do. We have to open her mind and recreate the event that brought her with us” “But boss Sweet Pea, are you really willing to go that far to reveal the truth?” The green pony laughed sadly. “You don’t understand my friend. The Crown will bury the truth as soon as the mass hysteria calms down. No, this is an act for mercy for the pony who showed me that there’s much more than it seems. Returning her home, her true home, will not only make her truly happy but also it’ll allow us to know the world of the other humans; the ones who aren’t mirror versions of ourselves but true humans” “As you wish boss. It’s all prepared, it will happen Wednesday at 3:00 o’clock” Books & More, Canterlot: Wednesday 2:57pm Lyra sent dissimulated look to the clock on the wall, her two hellish hours signing books about her new founds in Anthropology were about to end and only ten ponies remained. She smiled, pretend to be an idiot who believed in humans was sometimes exhausting but at least this was the last event as anthropologist in two months. She looked at the pony whose book she was signing. “Ey, did I know you from somewhere? I have the idea I’ve seen you face before…” The pony smiled to Lyra. “That depends, do you read the financial section a lot?” He asked with a smile. Lyra’s eyes widened. “Oh right! You’re Sweet Pea, the tycoon of canned veggies! Do you really believe in humans?” “Of course, as you say ‘the truth is out there’ right, doctor Heartstrings? I’m your fan!” Lyra nodded. “Glad you like my books” “I can’t have enough of them, right guys?” Sweet Pea asked to the nine ponies behind him. “Of course boss!” They said at the unison. Lyra looked at the nine ponies. “So they all work for you?” “My bodyguards. Having money is like having a target painted right on your back, you know doctor?” Lyra smiled relieved this was actually the last book she had to sign for the afternoon. Sweet Pea admired the autograph with a dream-like look and smiled to Lyra making her feel very, very uncomfortable. “Ehm, what else do you need?” He grinned. “You see doctor, you’ve inspired me. At first I was just a young colt with no idea what to do with my life… until I found your books and knew I had to become ‘somepony’ to research for the TRUTH without being caught. That’s when I started working in the canned veggies business becoming who I am now, and also researching for more evidence of human’s existence in Equestria. Doctor you saved me” Lyra gulped looking around. The bodyguards were positioning themselves to block every entrances and exists. She was a very skilled agent but she was not capable to fight nine ponies at the same time. Her only hope was to dominate Sweet Pea before the other ponies catch her. “For a while I doubted about your convictions doc, I thought you were inventing things out of nowhere just to sell more books… but at the AnthroCon you showed me my suspicions were unjustified. Your clues lead you to the same event that mines… what happened sixteen years ago!” Lyra then jumped to take Sweet Pea and escape but the bodyguards were faster and submitted her to the ground hopeless and without any chance to escape. And to make things extra sure, somepony putted an anti-magic ring on her horn. “I know I’m acting creepy doctor, sorry about it but you must listen to me please. I have a contact at the Royal Archives, and I don’t mean the Canterlot Archives, no, the real ones…” Lyra shivered. From all conspiracy theories among anthropologists at least there was one she knew was real: the Canterlot Archives were just a bait for Equestria’s enemies and Celestia’s real secret documents were kept underground in a location known as Royal Archives. Sweet Pea sighed and continued: “However, you know only half of the truth doctor Heartstrings. Effectively during that magic outburst from Nightmare Moon Equestria temporary fused with the human world… but what you didn’t knew was that a human baby was sucked into our world before Celestia fixed everything and when she realized the poor creature was trapped here in Equestria. Celestia had to transform her into a pony to protect her and trusted the poor baby to a family that desperately wanted a child for their own but they couldn’t” Lyra sighed in exasperation having a very clear idea where Sweet Pea was going. “Dude… I have issues but you…” Sweet Pea ignored her and continued: “However, that magic Celestia used to close the portals and turn the human baby into a pony foal leaves very noticeable traces for the right ponies. Traces both in the environment… and the psyche. How do you explain you’re the greatest expert in Anthropology in all over Equestria? How do you explain you could make such a great theory basing only in a document from sixteen years ago? In the bottom of your heart Lyra, you know you’re not from this world” “Pal you’re creeping me out, please let me go before you do something you’ll regret!” Cried Lyra. “Doctor Heartstrings this is for your own safety!” “HELP, HELP, HELP!!” This was the worst situation imaginable for a spy, not only she was captured but not in a mission, no; because of her fake identity. Why this idiot had to be so obsessed with humans? “Knock her down!” Ordered Sweet Pea. The four unicorns in the group of bodyguards aimed their horns to the minty unicorn and everything went black for Lyra. When she woke up she was in front of Canterlot Archives held by five of Sweet Pea’s bodyguards, surrounded by the other four and other unicorns she didn’t knew. Dang it, if she weren’t being held she could easily take off the anti-magic ring from her horn (something almost any unicorn was capable of but she was a trained soldier) and run away but this time she was helpless and at mercy of a crazy pony who didn’t know the difference between facts and fiction. And finally she looked up and noticed the unicorn held in front of her. “Dad!” “Lyra, I’m so sorry Lyra!” Mumbled the other unicorn. She shook her head. “No I am sorry dad, this idiot is obsessed with the nonsense of my books. LET US GO SWEET PEA, LET US GO!!” Her dad, Dewey, lowered his head. “Sorry Lyra but it is true. You’re not a pony, it was a desperate move Princess Celestia did after you accidentally ended up trapped in Equestria” “Dad it’s okay, I understand you’re scared from this idiot. I am too, you don’t have to lie to please him, I know he won’t’ change his mind so don’t worry. I trust you” Dewey was about to protest and tell her daughter the true again but he was interrupted by Sweet Pea who walked towards followed by a group of fifteen unicorns. “Are you ready to open the gate to the other world? Do you feel the magic trace guys?” The unicorns, hired from Celestia’s school for gifted unicorns took a deep breath and tried to feel. At the end they looked at Sweet Pea very surprised. “Indeed we feel the signature of Princess Celestia herself” “Do you think you can activate the spell back?” “We’ll try” Sweet Pea looked at his watch. “Okay you better hurry because my bribes and influences only bought us ten minutes of peace. However take this, is a document my contact in the Royal Archives took for me, it’ll make things easier for you” The unicorns studied the piece of parchment and after a quick mumble among themselves they gave it a shot. They all prepared their horns and activated the ancient spell on that terrains. Lyra couldn’t believe it. “ARE YOU MAD O WHAT? YOU’RE GOING TO CREATE A DISASTER HERE!!” In her Throne Celestia felt the energy raising and raising. Funny, it felt like the same spell she used sixteen years ago but in reverse. Wait, what? “SHE PROMISED SHE WON’T LOOK FORWARD!” And flew to Canterlot Archives, the exact same place where she found the creature she had to transform in… no, it couldn’t it couldn’t… In the meantime Lyra was still struggling to free her and her dad. This was the last time she would ever write about humans, really. “Dude, you have problems! Please, with your money you can try every hobby you want, so please, please stop this right now!” Sweet Pea didn’t listen, he just looked at the portal. “We’re running out of time, and don’t worry doctor Heartstrings I’m not goona hurt you; I’ll just return you to your real home!” “YOU ARE FUCKING CRAZY!” Shouted Lyra. Again Sweet Pea wasn’t listening. “MY DAUGHTER IS NOT READY FOR THE TRUTH, PLEASE STOP THIS WHILE YOU CAN!” Shouted Dewey as well crying in desperation. Lyra looked at her father confusedly when suddenly a blue portal appeared before them. “Don’t worry, if you don’t transform we’ll go after you!” Said Sweet Pea. At his signal the ponies threw Lyra through the portal. Sweet Pea was waiting to see what happen when suddenly one of her bodyguards shouted: “CELESTIA IS COMING!” “Shit! Move, move, MOVE!” They quickly closed the portal and left alone Dewey who was crying in fear when Celestia appeared. “What happened?” “They, they found the truth… the truth about Lyra…” “What? And Lyra?” “She didn’t know anything, it was all him. The wacko who kidnapped my daughter and me and now Lyra is… Lyra is…” Location unknown; Wednesday 7:15pm Lyra opened her eyes and screamed in fear looking at herself: she had read a lot about humans enough to recognize one of them. Her fur turned into a white tank top and minty leggings. She looked at her… her hands… what just happened? She looked around but all she found was a sign in the middle of the road: WELCOME TO DES MOINES Still screaming in fear, Lyra fainted.