//------------------------------// // Chapter 3: It's Rival Fightin' Time // Story: Diary of a Madmare // by The Corset //------------------------------// Well that journal was just plain depressing. NO ME GUSTA! I didn't like it either. Well we wasted enough time, the reader is probably getting bored. “Hey Rain let’s get going.” I said. “Why?” She said frowning like usual. DOES SHE EVER SMILE? I don’t think so. “We still need to reach our goal, and weeelll these rocks are getting in some really, really uncomfortable places.” I said blushing and shifting around. Rain turns red as a tomato and said “Yep, let’s go!” I got up sighing in relief. YEAH THOSE ROCKS NEARLY GOT UP OUR-DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE! Huh, Rain is refusing to look at us. I wonder why? We did just mention nearly getting rocks in a sensitive place which may have been embarrassing for her to hear. Oh, I uh didn’t think about that. Yeah now I can understand why she won’t look at us. “How much longer?” Rain asked. “Not much longer maybe an hour of walking, half hour of running?” I said scrunching my muzzle. WE LOOK ADORABLE WHEN WE DO THAT! I don’t understand why you readers find ponies scrunching their muzzles cute. “Really? Are you fucking kidding me? You owe me a drink after this!” Rain all but shouted at me. “Maybe I’ll get you something, maybe I won’t. It all depends on my mood.” I said with an evil grin. MWUHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU SHALL NEVER HAVE YOUR ALCOHOL! Idiot. Rain soon started grumbling and looking pissed off. So I ignored her and continued walking just taking in the scenery. Yep dead trees, dead trees, and oh look at that more dead trees. DON’T FORGET THE BARREN AND RADIOACTIVE WASTELAND THAT CAN BARELY SUPPORT LIFE! “Oh hey we’re here.” I said. YAY FOR THE POWER OF STORY TRANSITIONS! You are the biggest idiot I have had the displeasure of knowing. Ignoring the arguing voices in my head I looked at the destroyed city. My eyes were drawn to a sign that was severely degraded but still legible, it read ‘Welcome To Manehattan.’ Yep this is definitely the place. “What the hell are you doing Slaughter Fest?” Rain said annoyed. “I am reading. Oh and when we head into the city be on your guard.” I said fully serious. I then got up and started walking into the destroyed city of Manehattan. We passed several stores Button’s Awesome Arcade, Clockwork’s Clock Repair, and even a Pony Joe’s. We just kept walking. That until I heard a rock fall from the roof above me. My head snapped up seeing my rival ready to pounce. I pushed Rain out of the way and jumped back. Just as I did that she pounced leaving a crater where I had just been standing! “Rain get out of here now. That is unless you want to die.” I said seriously. Rain hightailed it out of there leaving just me and my rival. “It’s been awhile hasn’t it, Hyde?” I said smiling with anticipation. I heard dark, murderous laughter from within the dust. “Indeed it has Slaughter Fest. Shall we dance?” Hyde said stepping out of the crater and smiling showing all her razor-sharp teeth. “Let’s!” I said grinning. She charged moving extremely fast. HOLY SHIT! Indeed, her estimated max speed is Mach 3. No normal pony would be able to keep up. The only reason I can is my reflexes and even then just barely. THAT’S BECAUSE WE’RE LIKE PONY NEO! I don’t know if readers know who that is. As she breezed past me I drew Oblivion, my guns are useless right now, she can just dodge the bullets. LIKE THE MATRIX! Why are you so obsessed with the Matrix right now? BECAUSE SLOW-MO BULLET DODGING! She grinned and punched the ground causing the ground to start coming apart in a shock wave. OH IS SHE AN EARTH BENDER? No she simply hit the ground hard enough to cause a large shockwave upturning all the earth in the area. I dodged but lost one of my arms in the process. I kept running as my arm was regenerating and jumped into the air and brought blade down towards Hyde. FOR EQUESTRIA! For The Lunar Empire! She dodged to the side costing her an arm but I didn’t let up quickly changing my grip on Oblivion and cutting her across the chest disemboweling her. C-C-COMBO! SLAUGHTER FEST! FATALITY! Indeed! I won. I leaned on my sword waiting. And right on que her organs sucked back into her body and the opening healing over as well as her arm regenerating. She sat up and smiled at me her dark blue hair waving in the wind, and her green eyes filled to the brim with amusement. Her gray coat had no signs of the previous combat that she had just engaged in. Her cutiemark is the same disturbing thing it always is, a pony skull with sharp teeth and a bone in its mouth. “You finally broke our tie, huh Cuz?” Hyde said smiling her signature shark-toothed grin. DUN DUN DUN! Why did you do that? IT WAS A PLOT TWIST SO IT NEEDED DRAMATIC MUSIC! “Yeah. I’ve been practicing really hard. Oh and by the way how high is your kill count now?” I asked leaning on my sword. LIKE A BOSS! That meme is dead and you know it. “2,300,022. What about you?” She asked sitting down. “3,130,210.” I said grinning. “Noice. I can never get a higher kill count than you.” Hyde said shaking her head. It was that moment that Rain showed up and boy was she pissed. “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? YOU TWO ARE COUSINS? I HAD TO RUN AND HIDE AND WORRY FOR MY LIFE ALL SO YOU COULD PLAY WITH YOUR COUSIN? I WAS ACTUALLY WORRIED ABOUT YOU YOU DUMBASS!” She shouted angrily though at the last sentence she clamped her hooves over her mouth. SHE ADMITTED IT! LET’S PARTY! How did you get all the confetti? FUCK YOU THAT’S HOW! “I take it you two know each other?” Hyde said giving me a questioning look. “Yeah, she’s my best friend.” I said rubbing the back of my head. “You always get into the strangest crowds Slaughter Fest.” Hyde said smiling and shaking her head. “Says the cannibal.” I say smirking back at her. “Hey I can’t help it if pony tastes so good.” Hyde said shrugging. Hyde and I shared a laugh. “By Luna I missed this. You know what? Hyde, why don’t you come with us?” I said looking at her hopefully. YES YES YES YES! This was would make our group much, much stronger. “Eh, why not? It’s getting boring around here I could use some more excitement.” she said getting up. YAY! Good. “Yus! Um could you lead us out of here I kinda don’t know how to get outta here.” I said nervously smiling. OH YEAH SOMETIMES WE HAVE A REALLY BAD SENSE OF DIRECTION! Unfortunately that is very true. Hyde just laughed and said “Just follow me.”