//------------------------------// // Chapter 3: Names and Faces // Story: Red Vs Blue: Epsilon in Equestria // by The Sentient Cloud //------------------------------// Ponyville Hospital: Church stared out the window. The sun was setting, casting long shadows over the rolling hills – which was his all he could see from his bed. What time was it? His head snapped around as the door opened to the hallway open, and six of the seven horses re-entered the room, one by one. Despite everything he had just said to himself, Church immediately became agitated again. Why had the Memory Unit put him in a horse world? “Where…” Church ground his teeth, trying to remain calm. “Where’s the doctor?” “Doctor Stables had to go to the Emergency Room.” The purple horse replied uneasily. “He said that you don’t have anything wrong with you.” “Uh…” Church hesitated. “What does that mean?” “It means that ya gettin’ let out soon.” The Orange horse replied, also with an edge of unease. “Tomorrow, ah think.” Church bit on his lip. “Okay, so, just tell me. How are you talking?” The white unicorn and the blue Pegasus shared a glance, both of them clearly worried. “What?” “It’s just that…” The unicorn started out carefully. “Why wouldn’t we be? Everypony can speak.” “Not where I come from.” Church retorted. “Then why are you talking?” Challenged the Pegasus. Before Church could respond, the pink horse popped up beside Church, her back laden with snacks and other food. “Ooh! You’re funny!” She chortled through a mouthful of food. “Why wouldn’t we be talking? Oh! Do you wanna snack?” She turned side on, presenting church with a clear view of the food pile. “Uhh… Sure.” Church picked out a packet labelled ‘Rice Wheels!’ in enthusiastic red letters. “Thanks… I guess.” Then he noticed something on the pink horse – and image of three little balloons, down on her flank. “What’s that thing?” He pointed at it. “What thing?” The Pink one turned to stare at her side. “That.” Church said, leaning forward and pointing specifically at the three balloons. “Oh! That’s just my Cutie Mark!” “Your what?” The room fell silent for a few seconds, each of the six horses staring at Church. “What?” “You don’t know what a Cutie Mark is?” The dumbfounded purple unicorn asked. “Uhh… No?” Church was equally confused. “We don’t have them where I come from.” “Where do you come from?” Asked the pink horse. Still smiling broadly. “It…” Church looked around the room. “It’s far away. I’d rather not talk about it.” “Okey Dokey Loki!” Chirped the pink horse, dropping back down out of sight. Church leaned over the edge of the bed, only to see that she had disappeared. “Over here!” Church looked back up, to see that the pink horse was now at the back of the group of horses. “I… How the fuck did you get over- “Don’t ask.” The white unicorn cut him off. Church stared at the collection of multicoloured horses, his brow creased in frustration and confusion. “Whatever.” He looked down at his packet of Rice Wheels, lifting it up awkwardly between his hooves. “How do you open this without thumbs?” “What are thumbs?” Asked the blue Pegasus. Before Church could answer, the purple unicorn politely coughed. “Why don't you just use your magic?” Church’s lower eyelids came up in sheer confusion. “Use my what?” The horses once again stared at him in astonishment, although it was broken quickly by the orange one. “Let me guess. You don’t have that where you come from.” “Of course not!” Church exclaimed. “But you’re a unicorn!” The orange horse interrupted. “What the fuck does being a unicorn have to do with…” Church blinked twice. “Never mind.” He tossed the packet aside, and started examining the horses closely. “So... Why exactly are you here?” “Oh my!” The white unicorn’s face morphed into an expression of shock. “We haven’t introduced ourselves! I’m Rarity.” “Rarity?” “Yes.” her head nodded in confirmation, before turning to the orange horse. “This is Applejack-“ “I remember someone saying your name.” Church blinked again, with his only thought being: ‘She sounds kinda like Sarge.’ Applejack opened her mouth to introduce herself, but was cut short by Rarity continuing the introductions. “This-” She approached the blue Pegasus. “-is Rainbow Dash.” “Hey.” Church and Rainbow both said disinterestedly at the same time. Rarity continued on. “This enthusiastic Mare is Pinkie Pie.” “Hello!” Pinkie beamed at Church. “The Pink horse is named Pinkie Pie?” “Excuse me.” Pinkie said, still acting cheerful. “But we’re ponies, not horses. There’s a difference.” “Whatever.” Rarity stepped to one side, exposing the creamy-yellow Pegasus that still hadn’t talked. “And this is Fluttershy.” Fluttershy smiled weakly, giving a small wave, before quickly moving to stand behind Rarity again. “Wow. The shy one is named Fluttershy.” Church shook his head. “You guys must fucking hate your parents.” “And finally, this is Twilight Sparkle.” Rarity nodded at the purple unicorn that had being doing a fair share of the talking. Church shrugged. “Hey.” “Hello.” Twilight grinned weakly and waved her hoof. “Is that it?” Church spoke flatly, clearly tired of the entire situation. “Well…” Applejack thought it over. “Ya still haven’t prop’ly introduced yer’self.” Church tensed up, glaring at Applejack, who took a step back. “Or… not…” Church broke off the glare. “My name is Church.” He said, slumping in his bed and rolling over. “That’s it.” The six ponies looked at each other. “I suppose we’ll… come back tomorrow?” “Sure.” Was Church’s only reply as he burrowed down into the blankets, trying to sleep. He waited until he heard the sound of the door closing, and then slowly rolled onto his back again. How long had he been in the unit so far? Almost a day, apparently, which made Church wonder why he hadn’t been dragged back out again. Then again, he didn’t even know if time was moving at the same pace. He stared up at the ceiling, and then out the window, watching the last rays of the sun fade away. “Argh. What-the-fuck-what-the-fuck-what-the-fuck." Church closed his eyes. "This isn’t a good memory.” He sighed, looking around. “This isn’t anything.” *** “Do you still think we should look after him?” Rainbow Dash asked, a smug expression on her face. “Yes, Rainbow Dash, I do.” Twilight replied as they started walking down the hall. “What?” Dash stepped in front of Twilight, a suspicious look on her face. “Why? He’s a jerk!” “Can’t you see how sad he is?” Twilight looked back at the door. “He needs help.” “She’s right.” Applejack stepped in. “He’s hurtin’. I wanna find out why.” “Whatever. Do what you want.” Dash shrugged. “It’s not like he can stay with me anyway.” Applejack nodded, before turning her attention to the other four. “So who will he stay with?” “He can’t stay with me.” Rarity shrugged. “My house is far too cluttered, and Sweetie Belle would just annoy him.” Fluttershy slowly backed out of the circle. “Oh! He can stay with ME!” Pinkie hopped on the spot. “We can make all sorts of cupcakes!” “Ah think you’d just confuse him.” Applejack said softly, remembering how confused church had been when Pinkie had offered him food. “So that leaves my place, and-” “Twilight’s” Rainbow Rarity and Pinkie all spoke at the same time. Applejack looked at them for a second, and then shrugged. “I suppose yer right. He doesn’t look like much o’ a farm pony anyway.” “And he is a Unicorn, dearie.” Rarity added. “I think it’s for the best.” “This is all assuming that he wants our help.” Twilight frowned. “He seems pretty antisocial.” “Don’t worry Twilight!” Pinkie smiled broadly. “Nopony can pass up the opportunity to live in a tree!” “Couldn’t we just put him up in a hotel?” Asked Rainbow, drawing hard looks from the others.