//------------------------------// // Perhaps Too Little, Definitely Too Late // Story: A Cavalcade of Cards // by QueenMoriarty //------------------------------// "When the sun died, the only thing that could save us was fire." The crowd muttered amongst themselves, controversy ignited from the very first sentence that Flim had spoken. He turned to his brother, but rather than a look of pleading for help, it was nothing but a visual passing of the baton. They had agreed on the opening line, deciding it was better to secure their attention than to try and arouse their sympathies. Taking the signal, Flam began to speak. "You must understand, electricity was not as advanced in those days as it is today. As much as the vault is powered by electric generators today, all but the youngest of us still remember the days when the furnace was filled with burning trees." There was muttering again, but this time it was vaguely positive. "To rely on an experimental technology to preserve ponykind would have been madness. It is all well and good to say that we did not need to chop down all of those trees, but the fact of the matter is that we didn't know that. If we had tried to tell you that we were going to run a vault off of the same thing that powered novelty lamps and usually exploded, you would have run us out of Equestria." That got the crowd nodding, and the brothers had to choke down a laugh of relief. This was the longest they had managed to speak to the combined populace of Vault One without being pelted by produce, and they were eager to keep pushing the broken record to its limit. "We have heard the whispers," Flim spoke up, and the crowd fell silent. "We could probably recite all of the slanderous things you have said about us more accurately than you could." "We can also put names to the whispers," Flam cut in. "And please, before you start branding each other as traitors and snitches, we want to assure you that none of your aspiring revolutionaries confessed anything to us. It was self-evident." "Some of you might recall an old griffon joke," Flim and most of the crowd briefly bowed their heads in mourning, "that the reason why our beloved Princess Celestia was never overthrown was because ponies are too predictable to ever pull off a secret plan. And as any comedian can tell you, the vast majority of jokes are only funny because they're true." Flam nodded. "For the sake of decency, and as a gesture that we hold no ill will towards those involved, we will be refraining from mentioning the names of those we know to be responsible. In truth, though, the messenger does not matter. What matters is the messages." Flim produced a scroll, more for show then for authenticity. "No earlier than three days after the door of Vault One was sealed, there were rumors and whispers that it was all just an elaborate foalnapping. Within the first month, normal social dynamics were re-interpreted as being the calculated result of some horrific social experiment perpetrated by my brother and I. Common knowledge about our professional and personal lives was traded between certain ponies as though it were top-secret information, when one could have filled that entire dossier from scratch just by sitting down and having tea with one of us." "And all of this within the first year," Flam tutted, unfurling a scroll of his own. "There hadn't even been occasion to unlock the morgue by that point. From there, it only gets more convoluted. The suspicion garnered by those whispers caused ponies to spend less time around us, generally avoiding us and going out of their way not to talk to us unless it was important. The rumor mill seized upon this idea and twisted it so that we appeared to be deliberately pushing you all away, viewing you as test subjects or commoners." "As a quick reminder, Vault One is our first permanent residence since we were seven years old." Flim looked more than a little angry. "We are more common and 'low-born' than the average potato farmer, yet you all treated us as though we thought we were kings." "Speaking of formulating conspiracies in blatant disregard for the facts," Flam picked up the link effortlessly, "within the second year of the vault being closed, we were being accused of killing Princess Celestia, or otherwise faking her death and slandering her good name." There was a sharp intake of breath that was nearly deafening. "There are others, of course, some of them worse, some of them not as bad, but at the crux of the problem is this; You believe we have wronged you." The way he said that sentence, and the direction he looked in as the words passed his lips, confirmed that Flim and Flam were no longer talking to all the denizens of Vault One. They were talking to Applejack, and the only reason that everypony else was here was to act as meat shields. To the brothers' credit, they did a good job of putting up the facade. "It would be pointless to try and deny that we have done some horrible things in the past," Flim said, voice full of genuine regret. "Yes, we have swindled. We have lied. We have torn apart businesses and families, and we do not expect to be easily forgiven for such things. But Vault One is no Super Speedy Cider Squeezy. We designed and built this vault as nothing more and nothing less than a safe haven for all of ponykind. Had we only built the thing and left the leadership to somepony else, your lives since the princess's death would have been no different. There is no ulterior motive here, A-- Equestria. We may be the Flim Flam Brothers, but we do have some decency." Flam nodded, and cleared his throat noisily the moment that it seemed like the crowd was thinking of dispersing. "But you may well wonder, why now? Why would we choose now of all times to address all of the rumors and controversy, when we have been content to let it fester and grow since the door was closed?" He paused for effect, then grinned as wide as he could manage. "Because tomorrow, the door opens. Tomorrow, Equestria, the sun shall rise once more." Vault One echoed with screams, cheers and general confusion for several minutes after he had said that, and the brothers let it run its course. In the meantime, they waved her forward, and guided her up onto the stage with them. The sight of a purple unicorn joining the Flim Flam Brothers at the head of the hall got most ponies' attention, and Flim approached the microphone. "Equestria, allow me to introduce Twilight Sparkle. A blank flank for thirty years, she recently earned her cutie mark while assisting in routine maintenance on the vault exterior. Miss Sparkle, if you would." Twilight blushed, nodded, and turned so that the ponies of Vault One could see her flank. There sat an image of the sun, looking for all the world to be just the same as Celestia's cutie mark. And if the last round of cheering had made the vault echo, then this volley made the vault shake and rattle. "And before you ask, yes, we checked. This single unicorn can indeed move the sun. We have been testing this extensively for the past three months, and we can now finally say that Twilight Sparkle is ready. And now, at last, we are ready to go out into the world and help it to heal. No more vaults. No more lab-grown food. No more whispers." And no more Flim and Flam, spoke a voice within the minds of the brothers. They froze, even as the vault dwellers erupted into partying and Twilight Sparkle was swept off the stage. "Please, Applejack." The brothers were speaking in chorus, so great was their distress. "That was the past." You cheated my family out of Sweet Apple Acres. My brother, my sister, my granny, slaves on their own land thanks to your contract. And then you burn it all down for a few days' warmth. "You can plant a new Sweet Apple Acres," Flam said, not caring about revenue for once in his life. "We won't even try to do business! We'll pay triple for any service we buy!" And I say that's not good enough. You bought, sold and burned my family name. Consider yourselves lucky that I only want to kill you once. Neither Flim nor Flam could see the black magic curling around their frail forms. Neither of them knew how a simple earth pony was crushing them to death from halfway across a hall larger than all of Canterlot Castle hollowed out. They assumed she had brokered a deal with the gods to make all of their sins weigh down on them at once. They were half right.