//------------------------------// // Biological Difficulties, Please Stand By // Story: I Am a Pet Changeling // by Queen Sanguine Dreams //------------------------------// The trip back to the house was largely uneventful; Rough taking the opportunity to inform Soft of everything that had happened that morning on our journey through the town and Alice's Restaurant. Timid was still fast asleep with myself trying to nap on their lap. "Do you know if Mom is back yet?" Rough asked as they leaned forward from their seat and rested their elbows on both of the chairs in front of them inside of the beast. "You know she don't like having guests pop up at random." "Don't worry about it, I already called and told her we'd be having Karol over for a bit." Soft reassured Rough, whom leaned back in their seat. "I don't know... you sure about this? There's a whole lot o' ways it could go south." Rough worried. "Karol already has a Tumblr, a Youtube account with a few thousand subs that like her science videos and alien theory, as well as an Instagram where she acts like a tramp in scientific cosplay. I'm sure enough of them will be impressed to re-blog or link it to their friends, and then this will all blow up in no time!" "That's what I'm worried about." Rough and Soft continued their worrying for most of the trip until we arrived at the house. I had no idea who a 'You tube' was, or a 'Tumbler' or an 'Insta graham'. Maybe it was like a cracker that was... 'Insta'? I don't know why there would be a tumbler though. Aren't those used in baking or something? "Hey Blue, you can hop off of Karol now." Soft reminded me, having already opened the side of the beast. We were at the house already! "Oh!" I blurted, carefully standing so that I wouldn't wake Timid and hopping off of their lap onto the gravel beneath the beast. I turned around to look at Soft, whom was creeping towards Timid with their fingers wiggling. "What are you doing?" Soft held a finger to their lips and shooshed me. "I'm tryin' to spook her!" They whispered loudly. Moving very close to Timid's face, Soft hovered close and shook Timid's shoulders. "Eh, wha?" Timid blurted in a dreary haze. They blinked a few times before noticing how close Soft was and immediately pushed themself away and into the beast seat they were on. "Aaah!" Soft was ejected from the beast, quickly shuffling their feet and spreading gravel everywhere as they somehow regained their balance. They were also laughing at Timid's shocked expression. "Got ya!" Soft declared in a teasing triumph. Timid was only upset slightly, but soon their eyes landed on myself and their mood swiftly changed. They looked up at Soft. "Please tell me that wasn't a hallucination!" Timid then pointed at me. "You can talk, right? Please tell me you talk!" "I... talk?" I answered nervously, worried that Timid might faint again. Instead, I was greeted by their eyes going wide accompanied with an almost insanely happy grin. "Yes! This is amazing!" Timid cheered, struggling with the belt across their chest and waist for a moment before a clicking noise freed them. They soon hopped from the beast and slammed its side shut, making me wince in sympathy for whatever pain the beast might feel from being treated so roughly. Sure, It didn't have emotions and it couldn't speak, but there was still the possibility it could be alive, if the 'smartphone' was anything to go by. You don't need emotions to feel sensation, just ask a Gouger. "Alright! First thing's first: We gotta get set up inside. Maria, we're using your room!" Timid declared, and I was quickly reconsidering my choice of word for describing their voice. Timid went to the rear of the beast, inserted a key and opened the back of it... and then pulled something smooth and shiny from the beast's insides and slammed the thing together again. Timid held an object that was smallish, black and silver in coloration... and indescribably strange beyond that. I didn't even have the words. "Okay, I got the camera. We're good to go!" Timid announced cheerfully, holding the 'camera' in one and and clenching their fist in excitement with the other. "First contact, on camera, Live!" they squee'd. Rough had already gone ahead and left the front door open for us. They were waiting at the end of the staircase with an arm draped over the safety rail. "So, you girls ready to get this show on the net?" They asked teasingly with a raised eyebrow. "Wait," Timid blurted, crouching down to become face to face with me and grinning with continued enthusiasm. "You're a girl alien?" "I... um-" "It talked! Aaaah, It talked!" Timid blurted in hysterical joy. Soft slammed their hands on Timid's shoulders, grabbing her attention. "Karol, you got to calm down or you're going to faint again. Yes, Blue is an alien. We don't really know if they're male or female because Blue doesn't even know. It ain't that big a deal for them... I guess." They explained in a calm tone, trying to soothe their friend's nerves. Timid looked to me, adjusting their glasses with their free hand. "Were you always named Blue or is that a translation, by the way?" "Soft and Rough named me." I explained as quickly as possible, not wanting to be cut off again by any more outbursts. A wave of Awe and a bit of jealousy washed over me from Timid as they looked wide eyed at Rough and Soft. "You got to name the first alien!? Do you know how lucky you are!?" Soft shook Timid lightly. "Hey, keep it together, okay? We need you to show the whole world that aliens exist, right? We don't have any blogs or youtube accounts or nothin'." Timid looked back at me. "Well, there's sort of a problem with that. Nobody is going to believe that Blue is an alien if its just a dog with a voice that comes from nowhere on the internet." Rough snorted as both they and Soft looked at me. "Hey Blue," Rough called out from their spot across the room, "How 'bout you show her your final form?" I blinked. "My what?" Rough and Soft then covered their face with their hands. "He means change back to normal, Blue." Soft sighed. "Oh. Well that makes a lot more sense than a 'final form'." Timid was looking at me with anxious anticipation, but my transformation didn't take nearly as long as they might have been expecting. A simple flash of fire spreading from my paws to my head revealed my changeling nature, as well as my height increase from not being crammed into such a small disguise. I had been in that thing long enough that my carapace was sore, causing me to tilt over and fall to the ground with a thud. "Finally..." I sighed in relief. I looked up at Timid, their mouth open in shock. "Th-tha-thats an a-alien!" Timid stuttered, pointing at me. "That's an alien!" They then looked with a wide grin to Soft and Rough. "It's an alien!" "Yeah Karol, we know." Rough chuckled. "But, but do you even understand what this means!? This is huge!" "Karol, focus." Soft insisted, moving Timid over to a nearby couch and forcing them to sit. "You've got a camera, there's an alien, and you can let the whole world know that there's more than just humans out there." Timid was a mess of emotions, though most dominant was a sense of pride. "Okay, I can do this!" Timid said to themself. They then fiddled around with the 'camera' and pulled some parts of it away from the main body of the object, turning and adjusting them. Finally, a red light came on. Timid looked up and me and instantly radiated joy once more. "I can't believe this is really happening!" "I'm not feeling well..." I butted in. The aching from my transformation hadn't gone away like it did in the restroom of Alice's Restaurant. My body was sore and weak, and I felt things moving inside of me that hadn't ever moved before. "I think I'm sick..." I complained, holding my midsection. "Oh no!" Timid blurted, practically falling out of their seat and crawling over to me. "Are you hurt?" They asked with great concern. Enough concern to fight off my hunger, but not enough to make the pain go away. "I need love..." I groaned, wincing. I hadn't gotten an actual whiff of true love since I had arrived in the land of 'Earth', and it was beginning to take its toll on my body's functioning. I couldn't make due with affection and concern any longer. "Love?" Timid asked in confusion as Rough and Soft leaned over next to me. "That's what Blue needs to feed off of. She doesn't eat food or rocks or anything like that, but emotions. I mean, I guess. That's what Blue tells us." Soft explained, holding one of my holed hooves in their hand. It was very soft and cozy feeling. "You're not kidding..." Timid blankly stated, looking at me while deep in thought. "How do we feed Blue though; just give her a hug?" "N-no hugs," I blurted, my voice wavering as speaking became more difficult. My wings weren't working like they were supposed to now. "Your voice is so cool." Timid suddenly commented before shaking their head back into focus. "Okay, serious time! The only alien on earth ever is dying from a lack of... love. How do we get it love?" Timid was greeted by the worried looks of Soft and Rough. "No ideas?" Timid asked rhetorically, "Well, um... Hey Blue, How do you get love?" "From the Queen?" I winced again, "I mean, the Queen gets love from the Infiltrators, and she gives it to the hive." "Well where do the 'Infiltrators' get it from?" Timid asked. "From... ponies?" "Ponies... like small horses?" Timid asked in complete bafflement. "You take love from small horses on an alien planet." "I dig tunnels." I clarified, holding my sides and curling into a ball. "Oh! Idea!" Timid blurted, pointing a finger at Soft. "Maria! Who gives you butterflies in your stomach?" "Uh..." Soft replied in confusion. "Too slow!" Timid announced, pointing to Rough. "What about you, Ricky?" "I really like Grandma's Cookies, like in those little bags of two?" Timid then grabbed a random object (That turned out to be a rolled up paper with 'News' visible) and smacked Rough in the face with it. "This is serious, Ricky!" Rough shielded their face from further paper-based assault. "I am serious! Those things give me life!" "W-well, uh, Think about them! Let Grandma's Cookies into your heart from memory or something!" Timid desperately reasoned, tossing the paper aside. Rough went still for a moment, presumably thinking about said cookies. They all looked expectantly at me for some reason. "I don't think Grandma's Cookies are going to work, Ricky." Timid complained with deadpan disappointment. "But... Wait, what about your Mom? She's a pretty neat lady! Think about memories with her!" "There's so many though..." Soft replied with concern. "Hey, what about that one time she flipped that drunk guy over the hood of the car?" Ricky chuckled. "That was pretty awesome." A spark. Just a small spark, but enough for me to latch onto. Soft chuckled as well, "Or that one time she was getting groceries for us and you forgot the popcicles you wanted, and she just dropped everything, put on Sunglasses and did her best 'I'll be Back' Impression of the Terminator and sprinted into the store in a sun-dress?" That got a laugh out of Rough and a smile from Timid. The spark was growing now; a flickering light. "On your tenth birthday when Rust ate your cake and while you were all sad and pouty, she went to the garage and got a backup cake just in case that happened?" Rough added with a nostalgic smile. "When you got in trouble with that one gang and she caught you while on patrol, got out of her car and took down every single one of those goons?" Soft added with a finger wave at Rough, causing them to blush. "Wait, your Mom took out a gang by herself?" Timid asked with surprise and awe. "She used to be the sheriff for the town! Didn't I tell you that?" Soft replied with equal surprise. "Never! That's so cool!" The flame had turned into a steady fire in my mind, drawing me closer and closer as if in a trance. I had never actually seen love before, at least in a pure form. It had always been scraps and leftovers from Queen Chrysalis, always just barely enough to get by. What was visible now was more love than I had ever seen! "Whoa, Blue, are you okay?" Soft asked, backing away from me in concern and standing up. "Whoa, holy Shi- uh.. Shish!" Timid corrected themself before they supposedly incurred the wrath of the swear jar. They also backed away, pointing their 'Camera' at me. "Uh, Maria, Karol? You might wanna get further away from Blue. She don't look herself." Rough warned, stepping in front of Timid and Soft, shielding them from me. It was right there. A bright flame that called to me, begging me to take it. Just a little bit closer and I could feast! "Hey Blue, get off me!" I heard Rough shout, and I was flung through the air with a hearty shove. My vision upending and nearly causing me to crash into a wall as I hissed in defeat at being so close to tasting love. So close! My buzzing wings allowed me to right myself before any harm came to either myself or the building. "The heck was that for, Blue?" Rough yelled, waves of fear coming from the three of them. I blinked. "I..." I didn't know what happened. What happened? I was on the ground in pain, then I saw the spark... the flicker... the flame of love right in front of me and I just... "Hey, It's okay Blue." Soft coo'ed at me, cautiously drawing closer. "It's okay, nobody got hurt, alright?" I lowered myself to the soft flooring of the house, taking a deep breath. I chittered a few times in nervousness from the complete loss of control I just had. "You sure that's safe, Maria?" Rough asked, advancing along with Soft towards me. "We don't know a thing about Blue, do we?" Soft reasoned, moving past the table next to the couch that Timid had been sitting in. "So maybe we gotta be careful, yeah, but that doesn't mean we have to treat Blue like a monster, does it?" "I didn't know what Blue was gonna do, hissin' like that!" Rough defensively replied. "This is so cool!" Timid nearly shouted in excitement, drawing looks of ire from Soft and Rough. "Sorry!" They meekly added. Soft kneeled down next to me. "You alright, Blue?" Timid chimed in from the back, "Did you get any love?" I looked up at the three concerned not-minotaur around me. "I... I've never seen or felt anything like that before..." "Seen?" Rough asked, interested. "It... It was like a spark at first. Just a tiny spark. Then you spoke more of 'Mom' and it grew into a flicker, and then a fire! A bright pink fire that burned so bright that..." I looked away from them, unable to make eye contact. The next thing I knew, I was being embraced by Soft. "Hey, hey. Easy now." They whispered soothingly into my ear. "It's all better now, alright?" I could hear a barely audible whisper coming from Timid. "Tune in again for the next episode of: The Final Frontier Came Here!" ended by a happy squee.