As you stare at the mass of pink throughout Ponyville and hear the distant yells of "FUN!" you can't help but let out a groan,
Kichi's Comment
"I knew he was a bucking liar."
Of course he was, it is his nature. This is your fault cockroach comes the demeaning voice of the dictator.
How is this my fault? you ask indignantly.
You chose to stop that loony from destroying that sun whorse. He was right all along.
Well excuse me for stopping a psychopath from using an army of brainwashed crazies, I know how much kinship you find with him! you growl back.
Bah! He stole the minds of the insane, I would take the strong. But even still, that foalish chaos god is loose because of her! A lot of good stopping that army was.
I... Uhhh... Errr...Shut up! you space out as you realize what you've done is probably null and void.
Quit speaking to him Bugze, he thrives on it. But yes, even I can't believe that that strumpet and that traitor were foolish enough to do this.
Of course they are Shadow of Luna! All you alicorns ever do is-
DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!! Selena roars in your mind, and you hear the dictator roar in pain.
Yeah, I thought you'd learn by now not to use the L word on her.
It matters not. It just proves my point. Damned Alicorns. They seek other to do their bidding for their own amusement. Look what they did for me when I returned, a librarian, dress maker, farmer, baker, veterinarian and racer all sent to contain me, and look how that turned out. They constantly seek "students" and "extraordinary individuals" to go to their schools to become their playthings, before upgrading them to "Princesses." They care not for mortals. They don't care who they make their playthings abandon. They don't care that they took HER from me! he rants.
Who? you ask.
You hear him give a subtle gasp before clenching his teeth and growling, No One! Besides, all you need for proof is their release of the usurper!
Okay, get off your soap box, you hate Celestia and Luna, join the club. But don't lump all alicorns for what they've done.
Bugze, quit speaking to him! Selena chides.
The only alicorn that I've seen as useful is the young overlord, but that's because she still has time to learn. The reincarnation of Amore is pathetic, and need I remind you once again that the Sun and Moon have released The Usurper? I rest my case...
Before you decide to end this conversation with the annoyance that his Sombraness, you ask him,
Kersey's Comment
Alright Mr. High and Mighty, before I forget and before my better half has an annuerism, what's up with the whole, 'Discord is the Usurper thing'?
That lunatic was known by many titles in my time; The Spirit of Chaos, The Overlord of Mayhem, John de Lancie, Meany-Meany stupidhead. Usurper just happened to be the first one that came to mind due to who my current jailer is.
As ponies say these days; Kettle calling the cauldron black. Selena scoffs
At least I lived up to that title. Your 'reign' didn't even last one whole night Madame 'I shall bring about eternal night' you Luna wanab-
"Ok. Night-night you jerk!" you say jamming your last sedative syringe into your head.
What? Noooooooo- Oooo, so much pink...
"Daddy?" Nightshade says giving you a confused look.
"Just giving Sombrero his medicine. He was being a jerk to your mom."
"Oh. I'll talk to him about that later," Nightshade says with a scowl.
As much as I appreciate the sentiment Bugze, are you sure it was wise to use our last needle?
Given how we're more than likely gonna run into the Deadly Six eventually, it's better we keep him drugged up before he can try anything.
You then look around to the jumping mares all around you still chanting Fun, as if it's the word of the day.
"Speaking of which, now we gotta figure out how to get through all these Discord Minions and find that lying sack of crazy!" you growl as you look for an opening through the jumping circle of Pinkies.
"Any minute now, they might decide to pounce."
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
"Um, they're just screaming 'Fun' Dad," Nightshade points out.
"Yeah yeah, that's what they want me to think, lure me into a false sense of security. Well I won't fall for that trap..."
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
"Any minute now..."
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
"Any second!"
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
"Any-"
Oh for Faust's Sake, just go through them already! an annoyed Selena huffs.
"Oh alright fine! But this isn't going to be easy..."
A Few Seconds Later
Fireheart 1945's Comment
"OK, that was...something," you say as you stand in the empty field, devoid of Pinkies. You thought you'd have to tackle your way out, but somehow, someway, you passed through the Pink Ponies without even being stampeded. Heck, you're certain a few of them even walked over your whole body, and yet you didn't even feel hard hooves at all. Yet when you looked back at them, they were gone.
You and Nightshade simply blink at what happened before Nightshade says,
"Well...that happened."
You sigh before putting down your daughter and saying,
"Just another thing to add to the 'Weird Things The Pink Psycho Can Do That Can't Be Explained' list. *sigh* Let's get this over with and see what exactly Discord did."
With that you and Nightshade begin to head towards higher ground to view the town, but before you get to far you suddenly remember something as you turn to face Nightshade before you say,
SnapDrake's Comment
"Alright Nightshade, before we inevitably have to head into town, you really ought to drink this disguise potion."
"What!? Why!?" Nightshade cries.
"Because Nightshade, if they realize that you're not dead then they'll realize that I'm not dead," you explain, "Despite how she acts sometimes, Twilight is probably smart enough to realize that the stallion traveling around with a formerly-deceased foal is probably her father. And then when she realizes that I lied to Flash back in Applewood, it'll open up a whole 'nother can of worms that I'm not sure I'll be able to ramble my way out of."
"Aww, come on Daddy. You're the best at rambling. You're the rambling king. You could ramble your way out of a hostage crisis in Saddle Arabia."
"While that may be the case, I really need you to drink this so you'll be disguised."
"Um, I'm already disguised. Earth Pony and everything?" she says matter of factly as she twirls around, showing her lack of horn and wings. "Nopony here has seen like this before."
"Oh...right," you say as you put the disguise potion back. "Sorry Honey, I forgot about that. Also because I'm used to all your disguises."
"No worries pops. Now, let's go see what insanity Discord's unleashed on Ponyville," she says as she crests a higher hill, and you follow.
You both now have a great view of the town, but even from this distance, you can tell there is Pink everywhere.
Nightshade takes Mangle out, and opens up a latch in the back of the foxes head and presses her eyes against it. The foxes eyes then zoom out.
"Oh boy, that ain't pretty," you hear her mutter. Deciding not to question when she figured out Mangle could be used like Binoculars, you decide you need a closer look to.
"OK, haven't used this in awhile. Sight Beyond Sight!" you yell as your vision zooms and you get a slight headache. And Nightshade's right. It ain't pretty.
So far you've seen Pinkie's coming out of the woodwork. From chimneys to even other ponies houses, the Pinkies are just coming from everywhere. You've never seen so much pink before in one place and to be honest it's starting to hurt your eyes. But no sign of Discord yet, and it's starting to get on your nerves. Not to mention the fact you're paranoid out of your mind being back in Ponyville. Who knows what kind of problems, besides the obvious one, will happen while you're here.
Despite the slight pain in your head, you continue to glass the area and eventually you see...
TartarusFire's Comment
A long single line of Pinkies crossing the street, yelling "Fun, fun, fun!" With so many lined up, this makes you remember one of your memories with your Granbuggy.
"Granbuggy, why are there so many of those square things moving?"
He slaps you on your back, almost making you fall off your precious perch, down the cliff. "That, mah boi, is called a cargo train."
"Oh, a cargo train."
"Heh, got that right. I'm going to drink this entire bottle of vodka now, don't bother waking me up because I won't." He drains the bottle in one massive swig and promptly falls down, back into his cave.
"It's Tuesday again?"
Nightshade shakes your leg, startling you back from your memories and out of your zoom view. "Eh, what happened?"
"Daddy, I'm tired of watching these Pinkies. They just don't stop! I lost track of how many there were," she says as she closes the latch on the back of Mangle's head and puts her back in the Inventory.
You whistle. "I was out that long?"
"Nope, they just move really fast... and in a circle." Nightshade's eyes glaze over, possibly from the ambient sugar the Pinkies give off into the air. "They never stop. Never."
"Nightshade?" you ask worriedly.
"All these Pinks make a circle...All these Pinks make a circle...All these Pinks make a circle..." she chants.
"Oh boy," you mumble as you pick her up and set her mumbling form on your back.
"I guess I'll head into town. Discord's gotta be around here somewhere. Hopefully I can sneak around these Pink Pests without being not-"
"FUN!" comes a scream next to your ear.
"AAAAAHHHHHH!!!" you yell in fear as you jump up and fall to the ground. This also serves to get Nightshade out of her funk.
Multiple giggles are heard as another group of Pinkies begin to chant at you,
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!"
Your eye twitches as these Discord minions continue to annoy you. It makes you so angry, you feel like shouting. So you do.
BrownDog's Comment
“DANG IT DISCORD! Reformed my behind! I knew I couldn’t trust you! Show your face coward!” you scream, but noling comes, aside from the group of Pinkies around you, deciding that they’d like to scream to the heavens too.
“GRAAAAGH!!!”
“Stupid Clouds!”
“Stupid Sun!”
“I hate things that aren’t fun!”
“LOUD NOISES!!!”
“I’m Good At Yelling Too!”
You stare confused at the Pink Ponies as they scream, mimicking your mannerisms to a tee.
“Alright, stop that the lot of you!” you yell, causing them to stop and look at you with stupid expecting smiles.
“Now, I've seen the mayhem you're all causing in town, but what the heck did Discord do? Did he clone the original Pinkie? Are you all from Parallel worlds converging at this same point in time? Are you all Pinkie, but she’s got Multiple Mare’s powers from the X-Stallions? TELL ME!”
The group of Pinkies just kind of stare at you blankly, looks of confusion all over their faces.
“Well one of you answer me! Where’s the original Pinkie Pie?”
“I’m the original Pinkie Pie!” calls one in the back, but before you can do anything or question her, another pops up.
“No, I’M the original Pinkie Pie!” followed by another,
“No, I am!”
“No Me!”
“Me Too!”
They then start all talking over each other claiming they’re the original like in that Spartacus movie Grandbuggy showed you when you were 6.
“Um, I really can’t tell if one of these is the Real Pink Psycho or not Daddy,” Nightshade confides from the safety of your back.
“Because they’re probably not. Heck there’s several groups of them still out there.”
You then yell to the mares claiming to be the original, “Alright Shut Up!”
They stop shouting and stare at you.
“It’s clear you’re all lying. Now, WHERE IS DISCORD!!!” you yell shouting in the RCV.
Their poofy manes all fly back, but they all give you confused noises and looks.
“Oh don’t play the innocent act. Your boss Discord, where is he?!”
“We have a boss?” asks one of them.
“No, we only have friends right?”
“Is our boss Butterfly?”
“No, I think it’s Jappleack.”
“Wrong, it’s clearly Light Bright!”
They then proceed to keep arguing with each other over who their boss might be, till you shut them up again, this time switching the mask’s intimidating voice on, and bearing it’s teeth.
“SILENCE!!!”
They all stop and huddle together at that declaration, but you continue.
“Now, no more lies! Where is he?!”
“We don’t know,” one of the Pinkies replies.
"Then how do you take orders from Discord?" you ask.
"We don't," answers another one.
"What? But you're all an evil diabolical army he’s created from the Pink Psycho right?”
They all look at each other before looking back and shaking their heads.
“What?! Then what is your purpose besides giving me a headache?! You growl.
“We just want to have fun,” answers one.
“Yeah, just some fun!”
“I don’t like this guy, he’s not very fun!”
“He’s too scary, and not fun!”
“Let’s go somewhere else to have fun!”
Then, en masse, the group begins bounding away chanting,
“FUN! FUN! FUN! FUN! FUN! FUN!”
“Hey! Get Back Here You Spawns of Tartarus!” you yell.
"But Daddy, they said they didn't work for Discord," Nightshade points out.
"Uh-Huh, exactly like someone who worked for Discord would say!" you rationalize.
You then chase the group, but their bounding greatly surpasses you. Maybe it has something to do with you walking for the past few days, but you feel a bit winded. You eventually do catch sight of some of their misdeeds as you look in on the outskirts of Sweet Apple Acres and see an entire building collapse.
“Holy Gacumole! They tore down a barn?!” Nightshade asks in amazement.
“Or half of one,” you say as you use Sight Beyond Sight and view the scene.
You see Big Red, just as massive as before, two other earth ponies you’ve never met, and Applejack the Hick herself. She’s still rocking that hat of hers, and glaring like always, though this time the glare is directed at the herd of Pinkies.
Unzooming your eyes you mutter, “Well this just shows how destructive and chaotic they are. Discord is probably still waiting for the others to put this together.”
“Was Applebloom down there Daddy? They haven’t hurt her have they?”
“No, just her family. And it doesn’t look like anyling's hurt. But those monsters are dancing around the fallen barn.”
“Oh that’s good I guess. About noling being hurt I mean. And wait a minute. If Discord sent all these Pinkies to Applejack, then they might be headed for the others.”
“Oh crud, you’re right!” you yell as you see another herd in the distance.
You chase down that herd and see them surrounding Rainbow Dash near the lake, she has erected a little fortress and is trying to shoo them away with an umbrella.
“You think the Filly Fooler needs help Dad?” Nightshade asks.
“Nah, she can handle herself,” you determine as you see yet another group hopping past, so you chase after them. Soon, you come across a meadow and see...
“Hey look it’s Fluttershy,” you say as you see the yellow pegasus with a bear and other animals having a picnic. Seeing as how the Pinkies haven’t gotten to her yet, you run up to her.
No way is everything alright with her. Discord singled her out during his lies, you think as you run fast.
Wait, Bugze, perhaps you should cover your…
“Fluttershy! Where is Discord?! What has he done to you!” you yell causing Fluttershy and the animals to scream bloody murder and cling to each other.
…cover your jaw mask…Selena finishes.
Your eyes widen at this. You forgot to take the mask off intimidation.
You facehoof at this, and put your slide over your teeth and are about to apologize, but during your facehoof, they take their chance and skedaddle away from the picnic.
“NO WAIT!” you call out and chase them. “Your brains are all mushed up! I’ll fix them!” you yell.
“Run Faster Harry! He’s yelling about my brains!” she shrieks, causing the bear holding her to run quicker.
“No that’s not what…Grrr., Get Back Here so I can Fix You!”
Harry clearly misunderstands THAT sentence and somehow goes even faster.
“Why is noling listening to me?!”
“Because you sound and look like a psychopath daddy,” Nightshade explains nonchalantly from your back.
“OOH, OOH! What game is this?!” asks a Pinkie next to you.
“Are we chasing the animals?!” asks another running besides you.
“No! I’m trying to help Fluttershy's Discorded Mind!” you growl.
“Help Butterfly from the animals?! That sounds like Fun!” says the one to your right.
Suddenly several others lend their voices to the chant of Fun as they overtake your running and begin catching up to Fluttershy and her fleeing animal friends.
They begin to chase them all the way back to town, but you need to stop for a breather.
"You *Pant* Freaking *Pant* Psychos," you gasp.
"Jeez Daddy, you only ran for like 800 feet. You're really out of shape."
"Oh I'm sorry honey, you're not the one who's been walking for 3 Days!" you snark back.
"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!" comes the chants of another herd, heading in your direction.
"Alright, that does it. I need some straight answers without these things jumping off. Maybe I could heard them...
Kersey's Comment
*Ding*
"I know, I can just herd them all with bees!" you say pointing your Power Glove towards the group, "Would you kindly buzz off?!"
This causes Electro Bolt to activate instead and you essentially taser one of the Pinkies, causing her to spasm and fall to the ground, causing the rest to scream and flee from you.
"Daddy! Why'd you do that?!" Nightshade exclaims
"That wasn't me, it's the stupid glove!" you exclaim before you yell at your Power Glove, "I meant 'Buzz off' as in bees, NOT lightning 'Buzz' you stupid glove!"
They are interchangeable. Perhaps you should be specific with your intent.
Probably.
"That wasn't fun. That wasn't fun at all..." moans the Pinkie on the ground.
"Is she alright Daddy?" asks a concerned Nightshade
"Oh she'll be alright. Now, time for some one on one interrogation!"
BrownDog's Comment
"Hey, where did all my sisters g- *Urk*"
“Now, no more games, and no more fun! Where is he?!” you roar as you hold her up by the neck against a tree.
“Please, stop! You’re hurting me…” the Pinkie gasps in pain as tears stream down her face.
This throws you for a loop and you let her go.
You’ve only seen them as mindless drones, you didn’t know they actually felt anything.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t…”
“This isn’t fun! I want fun!” she yells as she pushes you out of the way, running fast to rejoin the herd of Pink.
Her reaction causes you to rethink your situation.
“OK, they may be simple minded, but they do have thoughts and emotions…Dang it Discord, you made these drones have sentience? How twisted are you?!” you yell to the air.
“And they’re not really hurting anypony also. They’re just being annoying,” Nightshade surmises.
“Ugh! Now we can’t randomly attack them. That’d be the same as going around randomly slapping puppies who just wanted to play…” you think with dismay.
“That’s a horrible image,” Nightshade whines.
Tis, where did that analogy come from?
Yes, who would randomly slap adorable puppies? The Dictator asks in drugged anger.
Let’s just say some of my bullies were kind of psychos…
Before that can of worms can be opened, you decide to follow that Pinkie you hurt. Maybe she'll take you to Discord.
"Daddy, I'm starting to think this isn't as simple as 'Discord Did It' anymore," Nightshade says with uncertainty.
"Nonsense! That's just what he wants you to think!" you say as you trot into the town you've been away from for months.
An upon entering it...
TheRutherford's Comment
"FUN! FUN! FUN! FUN!" (and it just keeps on going) is all you hear.
"Right, what else was I expecting?" you mutter as they bounce everywhere, and there's no sign of anyling else out.
"Daddy, this is making my head hurt," she groans and holds your temples.
"Ok dear, just hop into the inventory and see if Mangle will play something to help drown them out."
"OK Daddy. Mangle, can you play that Fillymetal album Aqua got me while we were in Applewood?"
You hear Mangle give a yip in conformation as this begins to play from the Inventory
Well that just happened. Selena, what can we do now? There's nothing but Pink in site, and they're mostly innocent and feel pain. How do we stop Discord like this?
Actually that is something I wanted to speak with you about, she answers.
After your interrogation of that lone Pinkie, something seemed off. And now in the midst of all of them, I have concluded one thing.
What's that?
The magic surrounding the Pink annoyances is not Chaotic in nature. It's as if this were not the Act of Discord at all.
WHAT?! How can you say that when this bullspit is happening?!
I am only saying what I have felt. The magic about these dopplegangers is not chaotic in origin.
Not chaotic? Then how did this happen? They're not changelings, I can tell you that much. But unless Pinkie somehow learned Anime Ninja Techniques, I don't see any other explanation.
There's bound to be answers...perhaps that group knows something.
You snap back to reality and see a big group of ponies gathered in front of the Library. And sure enough, all the Deadly 6 are amongst the crowd. Though the crowd appears to be yelling at Twilight herself.
Apparently they're just as fed up with the Pinkies as you are, and expect Twilight to fix it. And yet, noling at all is talking about Discord. Noling even so much as throws out the possibility that it was him.
They're all just as stumped as you are. Sighing and shaking your head, you head further into town. No one else is gonna look for him, you will. Though with each step, you begin to lose your resolve little by little.
It just has to be him Selly. It just has to be...
After Awhile of Walking Around Town
"Ugh. All of these Pinkies are super annoying. Why can't there be one who isn't acting like a sugar filled Nightshade?"
What about that one leaning on the table?
"Huh?" You look to the side of the road and see a Pinkie who looks sad, laying her head forlornly on a table.
"Ok, now THAT is unnatural and wrong to see her not smiling...She might hold the missing piece to this puzzle," you deduce and walk up to her.
"Hey are you ok? Why do you look sad? You're not the Pinkie I zapped earlier are you?"
The sad pony doesn't even look up at you, and just mutters, "No, I'm just sad because I can't tell if I am the real Pinkie anymore."
"Huh? what do you mean? How can you not know?"
"Well that is just it. I remember being the only one here this morning. I wanted to be in two places at once, one place to help Applejack raise another barn and the other place to "catch some rays" with Rainbow Dash, but they were scheduled at the same time," she recounts.
Your eyes widen at this. "So wait a minute, you wanted to be in two places at once right?"
"Uh-huh, but then things got out of hand..." she says sadly.
"Aha! So Discord came to you, probably promising that you'd get to see all of your friends at once, and this mess happened right?" you say as you finally solve the mystery.
"No, that's not what happened."
Or so you thought.
"What?"
"That's not what happened at all. I'd remember if Discord did this, but he's been hanging out with the princesses since Fluttershy reformed him," she says without enthusiasm.
You deflate at that, your worst fear coming true.
"So...He's not responsible for all of this?"
"No. I went to the Mirror Pool and made clones of myself so that I could have fun with everypony, but then the clones started making clones and now I can't tell anymore who's who..."
"And this Mirror Pool is just some place that create clones?"
"Yeah...It's not as fun as I'd hoped it be..."
"Oh...I see..." you say as your world crashes around you. "Mind if I join you?" you ask the Pinkie.
"Go right ahead, it's not like anything matters..." she says sadly and falls off her chair onto the ground. You nod in agreement, before sitting in the chair opposite of her and faceplanting your head on the table.
Discord was telling the truth... you moan.
While that is a rather disturbing fact, I can't say I'm surprised anymore. Not after my readings of the clones. Though I have never heard of this Mirror Pool before.
Yeah, sure. That's all interesting. Discord is free to party and live and watch my train wreck of a life, and here I am, stuck in the middle of a sea of Pink that has nothing to do with me...
While you throw yourself a Pity Party, two voices break the unending shouts of Fun.
Spike and Twilight are walking right towards the table you and Pinkie share, but you're so depressed, you don't even raise your head.
"Um, are you talking to her?" comes the voice of Spike.
"No, go right ahead. Not like I can stop you..." you mutter. You see him out of the corner of your eye hesitate, before turning to the Pinkie and asking.
"So, lemme guess. You're the real Pinkie Pie?"
"Heck if I know. Could be any one of us, if you ask me. And if I said I was the real Pinkie, you wouldn't even believe me anyway. So can you all just leave me alone. I've got some important poking around with my hoof to do."
"Well that can't be the real Pinkie Pie. She is way too sad to be," comes the voice of Twilight.
"Well that is just rude," you mumble with your head on the table, causing her and Spike to look at you. "Do you not know your friend well enough to tell when one could be upset? You didn't even bother to ask her what was wrong. You just assumed, and you know what they say about those who assume."
"Um, who are you?" Twilight asks.
"Just someone that life hates," you say miserably. "But even still, I at least asked her if she was OK. And good luck figuring out which one is the real one." At this, you see the Pinkie perk up a bit.
"Wait I just came up with an idea. You could always round up all the Pinkies and make them do something super simple and not fun at all. Then only the real Pinkie Pie would likely try to complete the task because she would not want to be away from her friends."
"That is a great idea! Come on Spike, we have to go!" she says as she runs off.
"But I'm on your back. I go wherever you go!" the dragon yelps as he holds onto the galloping Unicorn.
As they run off, you see the triumphant look that was on Pinkie's face, begin to lessen as she laments again.
Poor stupid clone, not knowing her own life. Just like all the others she only understands fun and how this whole mess started and...Wait a Minute!
Oh, finally figured it out after your 'Oh Woe Is Me' Moment?
Yes actually you snark back before you get up off your seat and pat her shoulder. She turns around and stares at you with sad eyes, and though it's a heartbreaking look, you ask her
"So you said you remember being the only one this morning right?"
"Yeah."
"So do the other clones remember that time?"
"I doubt it. The other Pinkies could not even remember Applejack's name. The first one called her Applejohn."
"So then if you can remember an event from the past, then wouldn't you be the real Pinkie Pie?"
"Well I do remember when Twilight came to Ponyville, Defeating Nightmare Moon, Twilight's brother's wedding, the Changeling Invasion, Appleloosa and the Buffalos, the Hooded Offender, the Crystal Empire returning, and Fluttershy reforming Discord. So does that make me the real one?"
You slam your hoof to your forehead and say, "Oh Dear Luna, you remember that much? I'd say you might be the real one! We should talk to your friends about this!" you declare.
She seems hopeful for a moment, but then looks back down.
"Oh I doubt they'd even listen to me. Everypony is so angry with all the Pinkies..."
"Oh come on now, it's not like they're going to do anything drastic with them all." And even as you say that, you hear rumbling hooves coming from across town. You trot forward and see all of the Pinkies being rounded up by Applejack, Big Red, and Applebloom as they are corralled into City Hall.
"...OK, so that happened," you say as you turn back around to the sad Pinkie who is drawing a frowny face in the dirt.
"But I'm sure that we can still-"
Rainbow Dash comes swooping in and grabs Pinkie, flying of to the Town Hall.
"You are coming with me. We need to get you with all the other Pinkies so we can figure out who the real one is."
Your eye twitches at that, before you turn around and yell up at the pegasus
"Wait! You actually have the real Pinkie Pie!"
But she doesn't hear you as far back as you are, so you rush after them.
BrownDog's Comment
You follow Rainbow Dash to the Town Hall, where she flies in through the doors and closes them behind her. You look in through the window and you see her drop the sad Pinkie into where all the others are corralled.
"Oh Come On!" you shout, as now it's like a game of Where's Waldo. At this declaration, Nightshade pops her head out of her bag.
"Hey, there's no more Fun chanting. What's going on Daddy?"
"I don't know, but I think we're about to find out."
You peak in the window, and hear the book worm talking about some kind of test to find the real Pinkie.
“Oh, about time she figured something out.”
“Watching Paint Dry!” she declares as Fluttershy and Tacky McStabFlank push in a large board of wet paint as the Pinkies groan.
“…I stand corrected. How the heck is this going to work?”
“I don’t know, but I kind of wish I had a bucket of popcorn like Spike,” Nightshade says sadly looking at Spike just off stage.
Rolling your eyes, you tell her,
“Don’t think about that right now honey, let’s just see how this turns out…”
A While Later
“Oh Gods this is boring…” Nightshade whines perched on your head.
You think aloud, “I know right? Well, hopefully the real depressed Pinkie will pass this test, if not then…”
Suddenly one of the Pinkies looks up out another window.
“Oh Hey, Look at the Birdy,” she says in an innocent and cheerful voice.
Suddenly, there is a blast of magic and that Pinkie Pie contorts inflates to massive proportions, before dissolving into red mist that shoots out the door.
“WHAT THE BUCK?!!!” both you and Nightshade scream in surprise at what just happened.
Another Pinkie hears and looks at your window.
“Hey look at the cute little filly,” she points out, causing another to look. Both of them suddenly get blasted by magic and the same thing happens to them.
“WHAT IS HAPPENING?!” you yell.
“Oh My Gods Daddy! Ms. Twilight is killing them!” shrieks Nightshade with tears in her eyes.
You look to the stage and see Twilight send out another beam of magic at a Pinkie that decided to bounce up and touch the ceiling, and another one who watched her.
“She....She…” you blubber out at a loss for words.
So this is her plan? To cull them all to the least temperamental one? Selena asks in disgust.
Ha ha ha. Good for the Unicorn. Killing what she loves…the drugged king chuckles.
“NO, NO!” Nightshade whines as she holds her ears and closes her eyes as more magic blasts are heard.
The strange thing is, none of the other Pinkies run, they just keep staring at the paint, probably too afraid to even move.
Still at a loss for words, the implication pounds into your brain. These clones could feel pain, they could feel fear. They could feel…
SNAP
“Is that a frog crossed with an orange?” asks one of the Pinkies, and as Twilight is about to fire her laser, the front door is kicked open, striking Applejack and Rainbow Dash, and you shout,
“WOULD YOU KINDLY BUCK OFF YOU MURDERER?!!!”
Twilight is suddenly lifted into the air flailing as she hits her head on the ceiling, causing Rarity, Fluttershy and Spike to gasp in surprise. This causes all of the Pinkies, aside from one near the front to look back at you.
“Come on Pinkies! Run while you still can!” you yell.
“Huh?” comes the collective confused statement.
“Are you all daft?! SHE’S GONNA KILL YOU ALL!!!”
There is a silent pause that seems to last for eternity, before they all begin panicking and screaming and running towards you and the entrance, leaving a single Pinkie in the front row who continues to stare at the paint drying.
“No, Stop Them!” cries Twilight, as Rainbow, Fluttershy, AJ, and Rarity start running towards you, but you close the door and shout,
“WOULD YOU KINDLY FREEZE?!” encasing it in ice.
You then turn to the scared Pinkies who ask, “What do we do Mr. Mask Man? We don't want to be killed!”
“Follow me to freedom!” you yell as you begin leading them away from the City Hall before the Bookworm can sate her bloodlust again.
“FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM!”
Erised the ink Moth's Comment
"Where are we going Daddy?" Nightshade asks.
"We're getting these Pinkies far away where they'll be safe. Now duck down baby, I don't want to lose you amongst all the Pink."
She nods and ducks back into the Inventory.
"Where do we go Mr. Mask Man?" asks one of the Pinkies, and you see she has a scorch mark on her side. She's the one you Electrified before.
"I, Um..."
As the others chant "Freedom", you hear in the distance the sound of a train whistle.
*DING*
"Here! Take these, buy some tickets, and get out of Ponyville! I'll stall them!" you yell as you hand the Buzzed Pinkie enough bits to buy about 40 train tickets. She nods, and they all start bouncing towards the Train Station.
"Go little Pinkies! Run for your lives! Get to da chop-I Mean Train!" you shout, watching as the mob bounces for their sentient lives. You however stay behind. There's a matter to attend to.
A beam of magic slices through the iced over doors of city hall, presenting the matter herself.
"Quick everypony! Don't let them get away!" Twilight shouts to her friends, who are about to take off and recapture the clones.
"YOU! SHALL NOT! PASS!" you blast them all back with your royal Canterlot voice.
"Oh No, It's the Brain Stallion that wanted to neuter Harry," Fluttershy whimpers back. Twilight hearing this, and recognizing you from before growls.
"You." Twilight rounds on you with a death glare. In a flash of light she teleports right into your face and jabs a hoof into your chest. "Who in Celestia's name are you, and what in the world were you thinking just now?! You let them all escape! Who knows how much damage they'll do before we catch them again? What if they escape... and we never get the real Pinkie Pie back?"
"Well I know what won't help getting the real Pinkie back," you say calmly. "MURDERING THEM UNTIL THERE'S ONLY ONE LEFT YOU MONSTER!!!"
Twilight rubs her ear and looks at you strangely. Then she lets out a tiny chuckle.
"Oh, it's alright. Those are just clones, magical constructs. I don't know where they came from, but it certainly isn't murder. I'm just hitting them with a counter-spell to deconstruct them and send them back to where they came from, sort of like... returning an extra box of chopped lettuce to the store."
You give her a blank stare.
"Did you literally compare ponies to chopped lettuce just now?"
"It does seem kind of harsh when you think about it like that." Fluttershy softly points out, causing the rest of Twilight's friends to give awkward glances.
"Come on girls," Twilight tries to reason with them, sensing their mixed feelings about all this. "They're not real, they're just mindless clones!"
"Oh really?" you argue, "Mindless clones that can think? Mindless clones that can feel pain? Mindless clones that can follow instructions, show interest in things, even almost learn your names?! Those kinds of mindless clones?!"
Twilight shrinks back under your accusing tone.
"Hold on!" Rainbow dashes forward to protect her friend. "They might look like Pinkie Pie, but they're also completely out of control! They'll tear apart the whole town because they think it's fun, unless we stop them somehow."
"Rainbow's right." Applejack steps up, "Those pesky Pinkies knocked over the new barn we were settin' up. Much as I hate to hate anythin' that looks like Pinkie, they're a darn menace!"
"Oh I see what it is now," you say, stroking the mask covering your chin, "A bunch of extra Pinkies showed up out of nowhere, started causing trouble, and before trying anything else... you decided to murder them. So much for the magic of friendship," you roll your eyes.
Each of the mares are about to offer a rebuttal, but the words die in their mouths before they can get the nerve to.
"Sweet Celestia..." Twilight holds her head, "what have I done? What if I accidentally zapped the real Pinkie?!"
"I don't think you have to worry about that!"
You all turn to the sound of Spike's voice. He's standing in the doorway on the town hall, and beckons them all inside.
They all follow him in, and you see why. In the center of the room, still staring at the wall of drying paint, is a single, solitary Pinkie Pie.
"Pinkie?" Twilight cautiously approaches her, reaching out a hoof. "Is it really you?" After several seconds with no reply she adds, "You can stop watching the paint dry."
To which the Pinkie turns to her friends and tearfully pounces on them, somehow stretching her limbs around each of them several times to form a gigantic group hug.
"I did it girls! I didn't stop watching the paint for anything! I couldn't bear the thought of not being the Pinkie that got to stay with all of you!"
You let out a sigh of relief that the real Pinkie didn’t get zapped by Twilight’s murderous rampage.
But now that they have the real one, who’s to stop her from taking out the rest?
With them all distracted, you run off towards the Train Station.
AT THE STATION
You get to the station, and see the remaining Pinkies all nervously huddled by the ticket counter.
“Did you buy the tickets?” you ask them.
“We did, but now what do we do?” asks one of the Pinkies.
“You get on the train, hurry before she comes looking for you,” you tell them urgently.
They all shiver in fear before hopping into the train station, while the ticket seller just stares wide eyed at the scene.
You look back at the town, and see ponies coming out of their houses, but no signs of the Deadly 6.
You then rush to the conductor’s part of the train and say,
“Alright, we’re all aboard, get this thing going already, it’s an emergency!”
Clearly intimidated by your mask and voice, the conductor nods and sets the train in motion.
You then hop on it with the Pinkies as the train starts moving.
“Are…are we safe now Mr. Mask Man?” asks the Pinkie with a burn mark.
“Yeah. I think you are Pinkies,” you say as the train starts pulling out.
They let out a sigh of relief, but then one of them asks,
“Mr. Mask Man?”
“Crimson Vengeance,” you correct.
“Mr. Crimson Vengeance…Why? Why was Twibright killing us?”
“Yeah, isn’t she supposed to be our friend?”
“I just wanted to stay and be friends and have fun…”
“Some of our sisters got blasted…we thought it was part of the test,” another cries.
They all start whimpering, and you try to calm them down.
“Listen Pinkies, some ponies don’t think that clones matter, and apparently even Twilight Sparkle herself is bigoted.”
“But, we’re all Pinkie Pie. We’re supposed to be her friend,” whimpers the electrified one.
“I know, I know. But some ponies can’t accept that. All of you are gonna have to leave the name Pinkie Pie behind, you have to come up with your own identities and names, wear different styles, and be different ponies. I’ll help you.” You tell them in determination.
“Why?” asks electrified one, “Why help us? You hurt me earlier,” she says rubbing her side.
You wince at that,
“I’m sorry, it was an accident. And I want to help you because I couldn’t live with myself if I let someone innocent get killed just for living…”
The Pinkies start tearing up a bit at that, but the mood is shattered when one of the Pinkies screams
"THE KILLER IS CATCHING UP!"
You look out the window and sure enough you see Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and the Original Pinkie are all catching up to the train.
“Wait! Stop the train! Please!” you hear Twilight shout, tears streaming out of her eyes.
The train hasn’t built up nearly enough speed to get away from them.
"Buck! They're gonna catch up at this rate! And then Sparkle is gonna teleport in here!" you scream.
"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!" one of the Pinkie's screams and pulls her hair, and all the other Pinkies begin screaming and crying again. And 35 screaming crying ponies with the same voice is horrifying indeed.
The burned Pinkie grabs onto your legs and pleads, “Please Mr. Vengeance, save us! I don’t even want to have fun anymore, I just want to live!”
You nod and pry away from her.
“OK, I’ll slow them down so that you guys can escape,” you then reach into your bags and pull out nearly all the money you’ve made Bounty Hunting. “Here, this is 20,000 Bits. Use this to start your lives somewhere safe.”
100 Bits Left
“Where’s safe?” she asks.
“Wherever you can. I recommend Appleloosa if possible, very nice town,” you then put your hoof on her shoulder.
“Look, I said I'd help, but you're all gonna have to take it from here. Get them to safety Zapped Pinkie,” you tell her and she nods.
You then look up in time to get glomped by all 35 remaining Pinkies in one massive hug.
“We’ll never forget you!” they all say in unison and you smile, but break out of it, you have to stop the Deadly 6.
“I’ll see you all again one day!” you declare as you head to the back of the train car.
You then look out the train back and see Twilight and the rest almost near the train. Why she hasn’t teleported yet is beyond you, but you have to take your chance.
What will you do Bugze? Attack them as the Crimson Vengeance?
No, I don’t want this persona getting bad heat about him. I just need to shock and awe them so that they forget about the Pinkies long enough.
So The Hooded Offender will distract them?
No, I don’t want to fight…I know what will catch their attention you think as you take off your toothed mask.
Outside The Train
“Hurry up girls, we can’t let them get away yet.”
“Why are we chasing my clones?” Pinkie asks, “You’re not going to kill them too are you?”
“NO!” she cries, “I have to make this right. I have to help them and apologize for what I’ve done!”
“I don’t think apologizing is going to make up for the ones that got blasted Twilight,” Spike says on her back.
“I Know! But I have to do something! Whoever that red clothed stallion was, I have to show him I mean no harm!”
“Why aren’t we teleporting there?” Applejack asks.
“Because that spell back there was draining. No, we just have to catch up and…”
“AAAAAHHHHH!!! Too Much Pink, Let Me Out, Let Me Out!” comes a familiar voice, as all of a sudden the back door of the train car opens and a figure in mismatching clothes jumps out, landing on Twilight, causing a pile up with the rest, except for the flying Rainbow Dash, who stops in midair.
“Whoah, what the heck was that?” she asks.
As the others groan and get to their hooves, you jump to your hooves, and yell and ham it up at the retreating train.
“That’s way too many Pink Ponies for comfort! I want my money back!”
You then turn around to face them, and all of the Deadly 6’s and Spike’s eyes widen at what they see.
That’s it, keep your focus on me, and let the train get out of sight…
Twilight is the first to speak,
“M-M-Mr. Tennant?”
“Oh…Uh…Hi Everypony,” you say ‘nervously as you sport your Baker Sylvester Tennant clothing.
“You’re Alive?!” everyone except Fluttershy and Spike shout.
“Um, Yeah? I’ve been alive,” you say feigning ignorance.
“B-But, the fire…” Rainbow stammers.
“Y-You’re scarf,” Applejack mumbles.
Finally, the train rounds a bend, and is out of sight, and their attention is all on you and you let out a sigh.
OK, the plan is working, I just got to keep stalling so that the Pinkies and CV can get away. Their attention is now on me. The only problem is their attention is now on me. Crud, only Fluttershy, Spike, Applebloom, Zecora and Flash knew I was still alive, what the buck am I going to say to them?
Well everything but the truth obviously. I know you were being noble sacrificing yourself for those clones, but now you must reap what you sow.
You gulp at this and stare at the 5 white as a sheet mares who look like they’ve seen a ghost, a confused, upset, and happy at the same time Fluttershy, and an overjoyed Spike who keeps looking at your saddlebags.
"Well... this is awkward..."
WHAT DO YOU DO?