Twilight felt conflicted at the start or her journey to Elysium.
She was concerned for the well-being of Pinkie Pie, to be certain, but the assurances of both Cloudstitch and Zodiac that she would not be harmed were most comforting. She had grown to trust this twosome, even in a land where as many ponies lied as were truthful.
And so it was, not long after starting back down the dirt path through the forest, with Zodiac by her side, that the apprehension and fear of what has become of her Ponyville friend had soon dissipated. But that did not mean that she didn’t have serious questions related to recent events:
“I don’t understand. Pinkie and I never saw any earth ponies during our walk to Utopia. We never saw any earth ponies in Utopia. Where did they come from?”
“They hide in plain sight, as it were,” Zodiac responds coldly. “The most logical explanation is that somepony in Elysium has mastered the same art of crafting prosthetic horns and wings that Cloudstitch had.”
“Wait, so you mean that some of the unicorns and pegasi that we’ve come across are earth ponies?”
“If everything else you’ve learned about our towns is to be believed … and I hope you do believe, as I have no reason to deceive you … then there is no other rational explanation. Tell me Twilight: do you remember what caused you to black out last night?”
Twilight pauses as her eyes roll to the sky. “It was a statement by some yellow unicorn. It seemed to conflict with what I knew of these towns.”
“Did this unicorn have a blue mane?”
“Yes, he did. Do you know who I’m referring to?”
“Sunbolt. He’s the leader of the earth pony rebellion. He and his group have wreaked a lot of havoc in our twin towns for some time now.”
The ideas of rebellion and havoc coinciding with the idyllic nature of Utopia catches Twilight off-guard. “I’m not following you. I saw no strife among the ponies in Utopia. I’ll admit that I haven’t seen much of the town, but everything I did see seemed perfectly normal.”
“Their mere existence causes strife,” Zodiac replies, an undertone of anger in his voice. These towns are founded on logic and reasoning; you have seen this firsthoof, and I’m sure you can appreciate that.”
Twilight stumbles with a response. “Well, yeah, I do like logic and rational thought, but—“
“And look what happened to you. Let me guess: Sunbolt claimed that he was from Paradise, right?”
Again, Twilight is surprised by Zodiac. “He did. But how did you—“
“And you couldn’t rationalize the statement, could you. As you already know, no unicorn would claim to be from Paradise. Those from Utopia would always truthfully claim that they came from Utopia, and those from Paradise would always lie and state otherwise. And Sunbolt’s very comment threw all that reasoning into utter chaos; your brain couldn’t process this, and you blacked out.”
Twilight says nothing, and just nods in acceptance of the facts.
“We’ve come to refer to these instances as ‘logic bombs’. And ever since the earth ponies started infiltrating our ranks, we’ve had to deal with these. Those in the Alicorn Society have come to accept that there are earth ponies in our ranks, pretending to be unicorns and pegasi. We have caught many, and tried to banish them from our towns … but it isn’t easy to keep them away for long. Worse, we’ve had instances where we knew that one from a group of ponies was an earth pony, but could not deduce which.”
“Could you give an example of that?” Twilight innocently asks.
“Well consider a pair of unicorns, let’s just call them ‘A’ and ‘B’ for the sake of simplicity. A states that B comes from Utopia, and B states that A comes from Paradise. What would you deduce from that?”
Twilight talks out her thought process: “If A is truthful, then B really does come from Utopia; hence B is truthful, so A comes from Paradise … but no unicorn from Paradise is truthful. That means that A lied, so B would actually come from Paradise, meaning that B lied, so A actually comes from Utopia … but unicorns from Utopia are truthful.” She turns to Zodiac. “I can only conclude that such a scenario could never occur.”
“And yet it did, not so long ago,” Zodiac retorts. “A pegasus who overhead the pair blacked out, just like you did. We in the Society gathered up the pair, knowing that at least one was an earth pony … and perhaps both. And it’s not just unicorn pairs: any group of unicorns and pegasi could have earth ponies in it, and it’s up to us to keep them separated.”
Twilight considers Zodiac’s statement to be rather unfriendly in nature, but keeps the thought to herself as her companion urges her onward: “We’ve dilly-dallied long enough; we need to press on.”
“… and as I was telling myself before you showed up, why would anypony write just a single letter. I mean, you need lots of letters to make words, but then you need lots of words to write a single letter. That’s just mind-blowing, isn’t it?”
The ‘unicorn’ … that Pinkie learned was not really a unicorn … held his tongue for much of the journey, but at long last felt the need to interrupt the stream of consciousness emanating from the pink pony’s mouth. “Do you ever tire of talking?”
“Not really. Well, I do get tired of course, and when I do I just go to sleep, but when I’m awake I just love taking everything in and enjoying life. You know, you really need to enjoy life while you can, ‘cause it’d be such a boring existence if you didn’t enjoy life, you know what I mean?”
“ENOUGH!!!” The command paused Pinkie’s comments, if but for a moment.
“Say, what do I call you anyway? We’ve been walking for a long time now, and left the forest area just a few minutes ago … ooo, and I saw the balloon I came in with Twilight! … but I still don’t know your name.”
“Just call me Sunbolt.”
“ ‘Sunbolt’? As in, bolts from the sun? I would think ‘Sunray’ or ‘Sunbeam’, or do I already know ponies with that name? Actually, even if I do, that’s no reason why some other pony can’t have that name. There are so many ponies in Equestria, it just makes sense that two have the same name, right? I wonder if there’s another Pinkie Pie out there. Maybe she’s a pegasus … what would it be like to have wings and fly? Sometimes I think I was supposed to have wings, but then I think about what flavor of cake I need to bake for the party.”
“What party??? What are you even …” Sunbolt sighs, resigning himself to not figuring out his target.
“You are so serious. Why is that?”
Pinkie’s innocent question causes Sunbolt to stop dead in his tracks; Pinkie and the others in the group halt as well. Sunbolt then turns to address Pinkie.
“I know you’re new around these parts, but did you notice anything unusual about that town Utopia you were in?”
“Well hello! The town was in a forest! I mean, who puts a city in a forest?”
“Not that,” Sunbolt argues. “Did you notice anything missing?”
“… I didn’t see a spa in town. Maybe I’m just spoiled to have a spa in Ponyville. Oh, you would love our spa. Honestly, you do look tense, and—“
“Earth ponies!!!”
“… what about earth ponies?”
“You didn’t see any earth ponies in Utopia, did you? You felt like a stranger while walking around, didn’t you. All around you are unicorns and pegasi, living in harmony … but earth ponies? No, we’re cast aside by that ridiculous ‘Alicorn Society’. Banished from their precious twin-towns, because we upset their delicate balance of rationality.”
Pinkie looks at Sunbolt in stunned silence; the latter appreciates the pause, recognizing that Pinkie takes his words seriously.
“You’ve been banished from Utopia?” Pinkie asks. “And Paradise too? Well that doesn’t sound very nice.”
Sunbolt smiles. “No … it’s not, is it. So we’ve taken to disguise to infiltrate the towns. We have an incredible designer in Elysium, who can produce horns and wings that are indistinguishable from the real thing … so long as you don’t ask me to actually perform magic, anyway.”
“That horn really does look good on you. Say, you think I can get a pair of wings?”
“I’m sure we can make arrangements for you. Now let us continue …”
After a sufficient period of awkward silence, Twilight decides to initiate a new avenue for the recent topic of discussion.
“So you said you felt it … ‘necessary’ … to separate out earth ponies from the unicorns and pegasi. But the examples you gave earlier didn’t seem to provide a way to determine which was which. You didn’t … physically …”
Zodiac halts abruptly, perturbed at Twilight’s insinuation. “I can assure you, that nopony, either from the Alicorn Society or anywhere else in our fair towns, would ever touch another pony. That’s not just a matter of what is right, or what is honorable, but ours are towns of logical reasoning and not barbarism. No, instead we had trials where the accused would make statements; then, we would deduce which were earth ponies and which weren’t.”
“So you’re saying that earth ponies who took the time to play dress-up would openly admit to being earth ponies, just to get banished from your towns?”
“Not deliberately, to be sure, but it’s easy for a pony to let her focus slip when pressed. If you like, I can give you some examples … but I cannot divulge any names. What say you?”
Twilight still felt uncomfortable with the notion of any sort of exclusionary policies, but her curiosity and yearning for more chances to exercise her thought processes, particularly on an otherwise isolated journey towards Elysium, won out. “I would like to hear these cases, Zodiac. I could always use the practice when it comes to puzzle-solving.”
“Not from what I’ve seen of you,” Zodiac replies. “Very well: for each of the following cases, I can tell you that exactly one pony, described as either a unicorn or pegasus, is actually an earth pony from Elysium … and that all such ponies lie. All other ponies in these cases follow the same rules as you are accustomed to: the unicorns from Utopia and the pegasi from Paradise are truthful, while the unicorns from Paradise and the pegasi from Utopia lie. And as anonymity is the rule when it comes to all ponies that have been through a case, I will refer to all ponies by letter only. Now then:”
“The first case featured two ‘unicorns’, though of course only one actually is a unicorn, while the other is an Elysian earth pony. Let me refer to them as A and B. A stated that both came from the same town, while B denied the assertion.”
“The second case featured unicorn C and pegasus D. C stated that at least one of them came from Utopia; D agreed with the assertion.”
“The third case featured three ponies: unicorn E, unicorn F, and pegasus G. E stated that at least two of the threesome were liars. F stated that either E came from Utopia or G came from Paradise. G said nothing.”
“The fourth case featured three unicorns: H, J, and K. H stated that none of the three came from Utopia. J then shocked everypony by stating that he himself was the earth pony. This rendered K speechless; she said nothing.”
“The fifth and final case I will share with you featured pegasus M, unicorn N, and pegasus P. M stated that N was really the earth pony, while N stated that M was not the earth pony. P then stated that no two of them came from the same town.”
“Now,” Zodiac continues, “if you’re able to determine the five earth ponies from what I’ve related to you, I will be beyond impressed.” He cannot suppress a smile across his face as Twilight mulls over all the information. Minutes later, their journey takes them out of the forest.
“I’d say we got another half-hour before we reach Elysium. Let us see if you’re able to figure all this out by then.”
Five minutes later, Twilight recites five letters to Zodiac. She hides her feelings of superiority, satisfied by the stunned look on her companion’s face, as the two trudge on in silent contemplation.
“… and that’s why I don’t like pauses in conversation, I mean who has time for quiet contemplation when there are parties to be planned and cakes to be baked and so many new friends to make. Any time spent alone or sad is just really lost time, don’t you think? I certainly think so, which is why I don’t like pauses in conversation, but wait, I just said that, didn’t I? Well that just proves my point; isn’t this much more enjoyable an experience?”
I had to ask if she ever kept quiet. I just had to ask.
“You’ve been real quiet, Sunbolt.”
The faux-unicorn lets out a sigh and plods along. Pinkie, still curious as to the darker aspects of the history of the twin-towns, changes her conversational course.
“I don’t understand. Why would Utopia and Paradise not want earth ponies around?” Pinkie’s question has the desired effect, as Sunbolt responds quickly.
“I’m sure Twilight heard the story from that ‘society’, about how unicorns and pegasi came to this area to found a town shared by the two ponykinds … but that group fails to mention that there were three kinds. And as much animosity that existed between the two, the one thing they agreed upon early is that they wanted nothing to do with the earth ponies, who possessed no outer-worldly abilities. No horns or natural magic. No wings for flight. And they both dismissed the notion that earth ponies were special caretakers of the land. So even before the factions made it to the forest, the unicorns and pegasi forced our kind to start anew on our own, away from both of them.”
Pinkie listens on in silence. Sunbolt, appreciating the gravity that Pinkie takes to his words, continues.
“Of course, those two factions soon found that they couldn’t agree on much more than that, so two smaller towns were created instead. Over time, though, feelings towards each other’s kinds softened. That led to the strange nature of veritas that pervades there. Those who’ve come across the twin towns have been inspired by what they’ve experienced; I have even heard from some that whole stories have been created. Perhaps your alicorn friend learned about these towns from such a text.”
“Yeah, she did read about Utopia and Paradise … but she didn’t mention anything about an earth pony town.”
“Truth be told,” Sunbolt continues, “it was the earth ponies who first attempted to mend fences between the kinds. But perhaps it was too soon; the mere sight of a hornless, wingless pony set off cries of ‘Begone!’ from the townsfolk. That was when one earth pony came up with the idea of bluffing our way in, with prosthetic horns and wings.”
“Pro … what?”
“Fakes. Horns carved from wood, wings from stray feathers, both accented with whatever materials could be found. But this pony, I tell you, was incredible with her craftwork. One could hardly tell the difference between real and fake … so long as one wasn’t forced to actually demonstrate the use of magic or ability of flight.”
“Wow, that’s funny,” Pinkie commented. “Not ‘ha-ha’ funny, but weird funny: Utopia also has a craftspony who makes fake horns and wings, too.”
“It’s no coincidence; those ‘alicorns’ stole the idea, and used it to bring the unicorns and pegasi together … but still keep earth ponies away. Cruel irony, wouldn’t you say?”
“But if the prosetuh … ‘fake’ horns and wings were so convincing, how did the ponies in Utopia and Paradise figure out the truth?”
“Those from Elysium were not as well-versed with the traditions of the forest towns, and would occasionally make statements that didn’t fit; this led to unicorns and pegasi alike having logical breakdowns. This led to many of our kind being caught … and upon discovery of the prosthetics, the idea spread to their own kind.”
Pinkie pauses for a moment. “So how do I know all of this is the truth? The way you spoke in Utopia sounded weird, like you were trying to lie.”
“I was,” Sunbolt admits, “but the truth is that we earth ponies have no predilection for lying. We just don’t care. Normally, we would be as honest as possible; however, when trying to fit in, we attempted to mimic the customs of the forest towns … but not always successfully.”
Before the conversation can continue, Sunbolt and his group eye the top of a skyline of a town down the dirt path.
“Good, we’re almost there.” Sunbolt turns to Pinkie. “We have special plans for you, my dear.”
“A-D-E-H-P.”
Zodiac keeps repeating the five-letter string to himself over and over, shaking his head all the while. Eventually, Twilight asks her companion how he’s feeling.
“I’m sorry, I just didn’t expect … and all while walking along this path, not in a study or anything. Truly, you have a dazzling intellect. You may be the Princess of Friendship, but you could just as easily be the Queen of Logic.”
“You embarrass me with your comments, but I appreciate the sentiment all the same.”
“I must know how you were able to deduce all those cases. Especially the last three; I thought those to be most perplexing.”
Twilight, taking pride in her ability, is more than happy to share.
“Well, let’s start with the first case. By your own stipulation, it isn’t possible for both ponies to come from the same town; one must come from Elysium, and the other from either Utopia or Paradise. That means that A lied and B told the truth; since one must be the earth pony, it could only be A. Also, B must come from Utopia.”
“With the second case, either both ponies lied or both told the truth … but again, your given conditions imply that at least one of them lied. Therefore, they both lied and neither came from Utopia. Now if D actually was a pegasus, she would have to come from Paradise, but that would make her a truth-teller. The only remaining possibility is that D is the earth pony, while C comes from Paradise.”
“The cases do get more interesting with three ponies. In the third case, let’s consider what E said. If E was truthful, then F and G are liars; if E lied, then F and G must in fact be truth-tellers. But this means that either E or G was truthful, and so either unicorn E comes from Utopia or pegasus G comes from Paradise … but that’s exactly what F stated. Therefore F is truthful, and so is G. Since E is the only liar, she must be the earth pony. Also, F comes from Utopia and G comes from Paradise.”
“Moving to the fourth case: if H was truthful, then none of them came from Utopia; in particular, H doesn’t come from Utopia … but this would force H to be a liar, regardless of whether she was from Paradise or Elysium. Therefore H lied, and at least one of the others does come from Utopia and is truthful. Could it be J? No, because he stated that he was the earth pony; by your conditions, earth ponies only come from Elysium. That must mean that K comes from Utopia. Meanwhile, J cannot be the earth pony; none would admit to such, as that would be truthful. Hence, H must be the earth pony, and J must come from Paradise.”
“The fifth case is the most intriguing of all. Consider P’s statement. If true, then P comes from Paradise and the others must come from Utopia and Elysium in some order. If M came from Utopia and N came from Elysium, then N would be lying when stating that M was not the earth pony … but this would mean that both M and N were earth ponies, contradicting your given conditions. If, instead, M came from Elysium and N came from Utopia, then N would be a unicorn from Utopia, hence would tell the truth … but he stated that M was not the earth pony, so she would be lying; this cannot be either. That means that P could not have been truthful; P is a liar and comes from either Utopia or Elysium, and two ponies must come from the same town. That town cannot be Elysium, since it’s given that there is only one earth pony, so either two come from Utopia or two come from Paradise.”
“Suppose two come from Paradise. P cannot be one of them, so P would have to be the earth pony, while M and N come from Paradise. But that would mean M is a pegasus from Paradise, hence truthful, and M stated that N was the earth pony. This cannot be.”
“Therefore, two ponies come from Utopia, and one comes from Elysium. Whichever town M comes from, she must be a liar; thus, N is not the earth pony. This forces N to come from Utopia, and since N really is a unicorn, she must be truthful; thus, M is not an earth pony either. That only leaves P as the earth pony, with the others coming from Utopia.”
“Remarkable,” Zodiac admits. “You even figured out the home towns of all other ponies involved. You really are somepony special!”
Twilight smiles … but quickly shakes off her feelings of pride and elation, remembering both Zodiac’s previous comments about the treatment of the earth ponies and the reason they continue to walk towards Elysium.
“I appreciate logic puzzles as much as the next pony, but that still doesn’t excuse the actions you’ve described to me. Excluding anypony is wrong, and I would think you already know that.”
“Our towns were collapsing into mental chaos. What would you have had us do, Princess of Friendship?” Zodiac’s sarcastic emphasis on Twilight’s title did little to ease the renewed tension.
“Exactly! It’s all about friendship! Whatever issues the earth ponies were causing you could have been resolved in a fairer and more equitable way.”
Zodiac sighs. “I couldn’t expect you to truly understand our plight. You weren’t here during the darker days. You’d have a different perspective if you did. But please: we’ll have more success retrieving your friend if we’re on the same side. And look; we’re almost there!”
Twilight notices the upcoming landscape, with yet another village on the horizon. “So what do you think this town has planned for Pinkie Pie?”
“I honestly cannot say. I doubt anything untoward; she is a fellow earth pony, after all. Perhaps they want to hold her as leverage for some sort of deal.”
“Well whatever the reason, I hope Pinkie is OK … sweet Celestia!”
Upon entering the village, Zodiac and Twilight are struck by the sight of numerous ponies … mostly earth ponies, but many unicorns and pegasi can be seen among the group … all kneeling and bowing their heads in reverence. In the center of the town, a lone alicorn stands majestically while grinning from ear to ear.
A yellow unicorn … Sunbolt … walks up to the twosome. “Knew you’d come, and just in time for our coronation.”
“What coronation?” Zodiac asks.
“The coronation of Alicorn Pinkie Pie, Princess of Irrationality!”