The fish had tasted good. It was obvious that Twilight had followed the recipe to a dot, and she was gracious enough to make him a copy of it to take home and try his hand at himself at some point.
She had also summoned Discord, who had, as far as Jax could tell, been overjoyed with being called upon. He had a feeling Discord didn’t do much in-between his meetings with Fluttershy.
Despite his and Twilight’s curiosity, Jax had been pretty cryptic about the what and the why, which only seemed to make Discord more intrigued. Especially when they left the room for Twilight to clean, and met up with the rest of the group. Why Twilight didn’t just get one of her maids to do it… maybe it was a pride thing, or maybe she was just used to cleaning a mess she made herself. Or maybe she had forgotten she had maids in the first place.
“Finally!” Rainbow looked annoyed at having to wait so long. “Are we done with all the apologies now?”
“Yes, my blue and rainbow-coloured friend.” Jax replied with a considerable amount of cheer. Now that his conversation with Twilight was over, he felt his good mood returning with a sense of freedom. “And we are going to get to the good stuff now!” He smiled excitedly. He never thought pranking could make him feel exited, but this was obviously going to be great.
“And what exactly would ‘the good stuff’ be?” Discord asked with interest. They started moving forward. “Is it taking over Equestria? ‘Cause you know I can’t do that anymore without Fluttershy’s permission.”
“Nope!” Jax answered. “Even better than that, my chaotic friend. At least I think it’s better.” He turned around with the grace of a goat and almost fell backwards. “Pra-“
“Pranking!” Pinkie interrupted, standing on her hind legs with confetti exploding from behind her as she waved her forelegs around in wide motions.
“Yeah. That.” He was just a tiny bit disappointed at the interruption, but shrugged it off. “Anyway, we are going big on this one!”
“Oh. I see.” Discord put his claw and paw together. A soft… actually kind of menacing smile spread on his face. “You have come to the right draconequus.” Then it split into a real smile as he threw his arms into the air. “I invented pranking! Makes sense that you would come to me for help. Let’s go make some plans.” He took them all into a large hug, except the guards, and almost snapped his claw. Then he looked at Jax. “Do you still do that thing with magic?” Jax nodded uncertainly. “Yeah? Maybe we should walk then.” He let go of them and started walking, but then he turned around and looked at Trusty and Shot. “Oh, except you guys. We can’t have guards with us, that would just be weird.” He snapped his paw and they disappeared.
Jax wasn’t sure if he should be grateful, since he was right and the guards would actually get in the way of what he had in mind, or terrified about where they had gone. “What did you do to them?” His uncertainty showed in his voice.
“Oh, just sent them on a short trip to Tartarus.” Discord answered nonchalantly, looking at his claw. Then he looked up at their gaping faces and smiled broadly. “Just kidding! I just knocked them out and sent them to their tents. They’ll wake up tomorrow morning, ready to do their job. Now let’s go, times-a-wastin’.” He almost sang the last part.
Jax accepted the story with a shrug. He didn’t think Discord was lying, so he followed after him as he flew or levitated or whatever kept him in the air.
He was reminded of something as they made their way through town and derailed the group from their path over to three mares looking ready to fall into panic. They looked at him, then at Discord, then back at him. It would be comical if they didn’t radiate real fear.
Sombra scoffed, but Jax put on his most winning smile as he approached. He had said he would come for the flowers on a whim, but he could use them to decorate his home or give them to Luna, and he had the coin for it so why not?
“Hello ladies.” He started letting his relaxed and friendly attitude do the work… or at least he hoped so. As it was, it looked like Rainbow’s and Pinkie’s presence was the only thing keeping them on the spot, a notion which hurt him more than he thought it would. He knew logically that their fear had re-sparked after Sombra possessed him, but it was something else entirely to see it.
Discord’s presence probably didn’t help.
“H-h-hello.” The one with a rose mark on her butt started. “C-can we interest you in some f-flowers?” She was hanging on beautifully. Well… not really beautifully, but admirably, for a tiny horse. It was clear that she didn’t really want them there by the way she was practically leaning away from them.
“Yes. Can you give me a bouquet that can be used to decorate the home, but can also double as a gift for a mare?”
“Well that’s rather cheap of you.” Discord commented beside him.
“Yeah, you’re not even getting them with Luna in mind - what you hope to bump into her or something, and if you don’t you’ll just keep them around the house?” Surprisingly Rainbow Dash seemed to have an opinion on how to be romantic. Who would have thought.
He was just about defend his pride and explain his thought process (which pretty much meant lying since Rainbow had hit it right on the nose), when the rose-marked mare spoke again. “I-I… I have some blue roses here, but if you buy them I must insist that you give them to… to your special somepony.”
Jax raised his eyebrows even as his smile turned into a teasing one. “Really? You insist?”
“I-I mean I know you’re dating Luna and I-I made them with her in mind, a-a-and it would be a s-shame if… if she never got to see them….” She quickly backpedalled, leaning further back.
“You did?” He asked a bit baffled, looking over her selection of flowers. They were pretty easy to find, being a dark blue that fit Luna’s coat pretty well. “They’re beautiful…” he said sincerely. The pony temporarily dubbed Rose looked a bit baffled as well. Then a small smile graced her muzzle, the fear all but melting away as she took a normal pose, even leaning a bit towards them.
“You’re the first pony to say that….” She seemed to realize what she said. “Oh, uhm, of course you’re not a pony at all… what I meant was-“
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it. Give me all of these.” He pointed at the thirty something roses. They didn’t seem to be selling well compared to other flowers. He would have to remedy that.
“All of them?!” Her eyes widened, but then she hurriedly started preparing them. “I mean, of course! Right away, sir.” Sir? Well… that was a 180 attitude change if he ever saw one. “They’re called Midnight Roses, and they taste great… once you get used to them.”
What? No wait, that made sense. He had seen Twilight eat a dandelion sandwich enough times, why should other flowers be different?
He received the bouquet, and handed her a nice stack of bits in return. They were pretty expensive, but it wasn’t too bad. He gave her a little extra, and felt pretty good about it when he saw her eyes light up. She looked at him as if to confirm that it wasn’t a mistake and he gave her a little nod, unable to keep the smile from his face.
“Hey, let me try one!” Rainbow took one of them quicker than he could react, and Pinkie somehow already had one in her mouth.
“… How do they taste?” He asked after they had swallowed. They both looked contemplative.
“Hard to say. Kinda sweet and kinda sour… not bad but I’ve had better.” Rainbow answered.
“I like it!” Pinkie said from beside her. “It tingles in the mouth.”
What the hell were these flowers made of?
“Thank you.” Rose said a bit relieved. “As I said, once you get used to the taste…” she gave them a small smile. “Thank you for your patronage sir. Have a good day.”
“Please… just Jax.” He smiled back.
“Oh… I’m Roseluck,” Called it, “this is Lily Valley and Daisy.” She gestured to her pink companions who were now looking on curiously. “We’re looking forward to seeing you again.” Her smile looked sweet and kind of relieved. He wanted to reach down and pet her, but restrained himself. He didn’t know how she would react, and she seemed quick at changing her attitude.
He laughed as he took off with his group. “If Luna likes these, then you definitely will.” He waved behind him at the flower mares, who gave him a last smile and wave before they bundled up in a hurry, probably to talk about him.
“So… I was planning on going to Canterlot at some point anyway. Is it weird I’ve only been in Ponyville and the Everfree?” He asked.
“Nah, a lot of ponies don’t travel very far from where they are born.” Rainbow assured as they made their way out of Ponyville and towards his home. “Though after the train tracks started covering more and more of Equestria, more ponies take vacations different places.”
“Not that it really matters since distance doesn’t really exist.” Discord nonchalantly added as if it was obvious. Easy to say for someone who could teleport wherever he wanted.
“And even if it did, any distance in Equestria would actually be next to nothing in the grand scale of the universe!” Pinkie took the time to pounce up on Discords shoulder. It was weird seeing her actually jump up there instead of just appearing there.
“Wow this is really getting philosophical.” Jax wasn’t sure how it had come to that. He didn’t like to consider things in grand universe scales. It made everything seem unimportant. “Hey look at that! Apples. Good ol’ apples. Nothing like a good apple to diverge the conversation.” They were nearing the expansive apple orchard, which they had to cross to get to his house.
Rainbow snickered. “You sound like AJ now.”
“Hey is that Luna?” Pinkie asked from her vintage point on Discords shoulder, using one hoof to shield her eyes from the evening sun… which was behind them. Maybe there was a different reason she placed her hoof there.
Jax squinted but could only see trees. Rainbow took to the skies. “Hey, it is her! And some pony walking beside her. I’ll go get them!” Aaaand she was off, nothing but her rainbow trail left behind to prove she was ever there to begin with.
He looked down at the flowers in his hand, and slowly a large smile spread on his face. He wouldn’t cancel his Canterlot trip just yet, but it seemed like luck was on his side today. He really had met Luna randomly. A feeling spread from his heart in waves of pure joy, and he wanted nothing more than to be with the blue mare that he loved so much.
He gave in to the urge and ran forward as fast as his legs could, trying to angle the flowers in his hand so they wouldn’t get destroyed by the wind.
He saw them ahead, two ponies talking with a hovering Rainbow Dash, facing away from him. Perfect.
“Lunaaaaa!” He yelled when he was close enough. He impacted with her just as she was turning her head. He could feel her tense underneath him, and incredibly enough they didn’t fall over but Luna just took a couple of steps backwards with him hanging from her neck. Well… she was sturdy if nothing else.
“Jax?” She looked at him, a bit confused.
“Hi.” He smiled at her, then got off and dusted himself off, for show more than anything. He composed himself for a moment, feeling the moment called for over-dramatization. He coughed into his hand that didn’t hold a bundle of flowers, and looked seriously at the dark blue mare in front of her, with her mane and tail literally sparkling with stars - one of the many things he loved about her.
“Luna.” He started over, thinking about how he could word his thoughts. “As you know I’ve long since thought you were beautiful. There is nothing on this earth that even comes near to your beauty, and that’s only looking at your gorgeous body and stunning mane and tail. When taking your mind into consideration - everything that makes you the cute mare you are - not even the starfall effect you made and showed us can compare.” He had tried to be over the top, but he found that his words where more honest than he had realized. How deep had he fallen for this girl?
Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Rainbow and the mystery mare react with stunned fascination... but he only had his eyes on Luna. Luna who was blushing so hard she was almost red. Luna who’s mouth was slightly open, who was absent-mindedly raising a hoof to cover it… or perhaps cover her entire red face.
“That is why,” he continued, “it is hard for me to look at something and think ‘that is beautiful.’ But when I saw these roses-“ he presented the roses. “-I thought of you, and I knew I had to give them to you. They’re called Midnight Roses and they were created with you in mind, so I think it’s fitting.” He smiled as Luna reached out with a hoof to take them. She looked at him, then at the flowers, and slowly a smile spread on her muzzle. A giggle escaped her as she reached down to eat one of the petals. Her eyes widened as the evidently special taste spread. “I heard the taste grows on you… just like you grew on me.” Wow… he was really smooth at the moment. This was a good day.
Retching sounds reached his mind as Sombra showed his disgust. ‘Try to be a little sweeter, I think there are some ponies in the world who did not get sick from that.’ Sarcasm… whatever, Luna was giggling again. The sounds drew him in, it was such an innocent melody, where none of her scars and regrets could be seen. Just a mare like any other, giggling happily at having received a bouquet from the stallion -man- she loved. The thought that she was happy because of him enforced the joy that was radiating from his heart.
‘Careful… you are taking in too mu-‘ But whatever else he was saying was lost to Jax as Luna’s warm voice drew his attention.
“Thy gift I shall accept, dear Jax, and I thank thee for thy consideration.” Ohh, going back to her cute way of speaking. Was she doing it because she was flustered or because she knew he loved when she did that? “I have no gift for thee at this time, but I shall consider what thou deserve…” she took the flowers in her aura, so that she could jump up and place both hooves on his shoulder and whisper in his ear. “And thine actions have made thee deserve quite the reward.” She drew back a bit so they could gaze into each other’s eyes. “Although I must add that the greatest gift thou hast gifted me, is that I can look at thee and know for certain… that thy love for me is true.”
Jax’ smile was warm and loving, as he gazed into the cyan eyes of the mare that made his already joyous heart beat with pure happiness. Nothing else in the entire world mattered, but the warmth radiating from her.
“Oh… Celestia….” He faintly heard an unfamiliar, embarrassed voice say nearby. “Should we leave? Why does everypony do private stuff in front of me?”
“Uhm… tell them I’ll come back with Fluttershy.” Rainbow Dash said, the last of her sentence barely audible as she got further away.
Chatter reached them as Pinkie and Discord finally reached them. “Oh my gosh, they are doing the thing where they look deep into each other’s eyes!” Pinkie burst out.
“Blerhg, I hate it when couples do that. What’s so great abou-“
“Shhh! You’re disturbing them.” Pinkie interrupted him, but it was already too late. Jax drew his eyes over at the pink pony looking at them like somepony observing wildlife. He smiled at her excitement, but then he finally let his curiosity win and looked over at the mystery unicorn who had been with Luna. She was light yellowish under her sweater, with a multicolered mane that reminded him of Twilight, and glasses that looked like they were held together with tape. Her mark was a waxing crescent moon with stars around it. She looked back at him with uncertainty, scrapping the earth nervously.
He gave Luna a quick kiss and let her fall down on all fours again, facing the new mare entirely. “Hello. I’m sorry about that, that was pretty rude.” Not that he would have done anything differently if given the chance. “My name is Jax, Luna’s boyfriend and resident human of Ponyville.”
She nodded a bit, to herself it seemed. “Hello. My name is Moondancer, and I’m Luna’s secretary.” She reached out a hoof and he took and shook it gently.
With that done, he looked around again. “… Rainbow went somewhere? To get Fluttershy?” He asked to be sure. He knew he heard her say something like that.
Moondancer nodded.
“Alright. Let’s go to my house and wait for them. Then we can start planning.”
“Planning? What are you planning? And where are the guards?” Luna asked as she fell into step beside him.
“Oh Luna… you’re about to be part of something great.” He couldn’t help but hug her while they walked which was a bit awkward, but the feeling of her soft fur on his skin was worth it, especially when she nuzzled him. Everything was just perfect.
***
Rainbow returned with Fluttershy, who looked unsure of why she was there, shortly after they had entered the house. Everypony took a place where they could, and Jax took the count. Rainbow Dash, Pinkie and Discord were part of the original group. Luna, Fluttershy, and Moondancer had joined them afterwards, but that was fine he wagered.
“Alright… for those of you who don’t know, we are going to go pranking… and we are going big.” Fluttershy and Moondancer looked around uncertainly, in a ‘I didn’t sign up for this’ sort of way, but Luna smiled. “So big in fact, that outside of this room, there won’t be a bigger-“
“We are pranking Princess Celestia!” Pinkie burst out, banging a hoof on the table.
“We can’t do that!” Moondancer yelled as the only one who reacted negatively.
“Awesome! Hey do you guys think we are going to go down in the history books?” Rainbow asked. Jax didn’t actually know, though he didn’t think so.
Discord looked even more excited. It was like Christmas had come early, he even did a little flip in the air. “Yes! And it wasn’t even my idea! She can’t blame it on me.” He sounded gleeful.
“It has been a long while since I pranked my sister. I think it is time.” Luna added.
Fluttershy just sort scuffed at the sofa she was sitting on. “Well… as long as nopony is hurt….”
Moondancer looked around in disbelief. “You can’t be serious! Is this even legal?”
Luna cleared her throat. “There are actually no laws against a good prank. A bad prank, for example… if something gets destroyed, is already covered by property damage laws.”
“But… this is Princess Celestia….” Moondancer tried again.
“And she is covered by the law just like everypony else. While there are some special laws for princesses, there is none that directly outlaw pranking on them. And there will not be for a long time if I have something to say about it.” When she saw that that explanation didn’t satisfy Moondancer, she leaned down to nuzzle the poor mare. “It’s okay. You do not have to be a part of this if you do not want to, Moondancer.”
“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” Jax added. “Besides, we are going to make very sure that whatever prank we end up with doesn’t hurt anyone, or in other way break the law. I promise.” He smiled at Moondancer, and received a tiny smile in return.
Rainbow Dash swooped in from the side and laid a wing on her. “Yeah, don’t worry about it. Princess Celestia is cool, I’m sure she won’t be mad.”
Pinkie swooped in from the other side. “Yeah! She’ll probably laugh about it!”
Moondancer fidgeted a little, but in the end it was Fluttershy who convinced her. “Don’t worry Moondancer. Nopony here is mean.”
Moondancer hesitated a bit more, but then she nodded. The power of group-pressure was truly beautiful. Or semi group-pressure at least since they have made it absolutely clear that she could leave? Whatever, she was staying.
“Alright, Discord, get that blackboard in here. Let’s bounce some ideas around.” As much as he tried to reign in his excitement, he couldn’t get the smile from his face.
“But whatever you decide upon, it cannot interfere with my Night Court, which starts in one and a half hours. Did anypony make an appointment, Moondancer?”
Moondancer immediately cheered up. “Yes they did!” Luna looked at her in confusion. It seemed like she had expected a different answer. “After your two hours of open court, five ponies have reserved half an hour each for small disputes.”
“Really?” Luna sounded like she couldn’t quite believe it.
Moondancer nodded vigorously. “And I think I can get more ponies to use the appointment system. It’s something Princess Celestia doesn’t have and I think it could really be a boon. In fact, i-if you don’t mind me saying, I think you should cut down open court to half an hour to an hour, since statistically speaking you don’t use the last hour anyway, or maybe even go by appointment only. Then you can assure a spot to ponies.... a big complaint among ponies who come to Princess Celestia’s court is that they can wait for hours, and end up not gaining an audience with her anyway.” She looked at all the people watching her and blushed a little. “I did some research,” she explained.
Discord teleported in between her and Luna, and brought them together with a hug. “Yes, as interesting as that was, can you talk about it later? We have pranks to think up.” He sounded rather annoyed. Before anybody could answer there was a knock on the door.
Jax smiled at Discord’s scuff. He went over to open the door, and was met with a sign in his face. Taking a step back he noticed it was Vinyl who was holding the sign with her magic.
‘Hey Jacks Jax
Sorry for the short warning, but I have some tickets for that changeling band I told you about, for tonight. You down anyway? If not I can go alone, it’s chill.’
He looked from the sign to the white mare, who had a cocky smile as if challenging him to decline. She had her usual headphones around her neck and dark tinted glasses that covered her eyes.
“Hey Vinyl.” He looked back at his gathering, then at her. “How many tickets do you have exactly, and at what time is the concert? And where?”
She took out a quill and an inkwell, and wrote on the other side of the sign. ‘Three, midnight, Canterlot’
“Uhmm… Alright. Is it possible to get about five more tickets?”
Vinyl shrugged and then wrote ‘Maybe at the door. Why?’
Instead of answering he turned to yell to the crowd in his living room. “Hey, any of you interesting in going to see a changeling band play? It’s at midnight and we’re going to Canterlot anyway.”
After hearing a chorus of affirmatives and why not’s, he turned to Vinyl again. “You interested in pranking Princess Celestia?”
Vinyl hesitated then shrugged, then nodded, in a sort of ‘why not’ motion.
“Alright, come on in.” He moved to the side to let her in. She hesitated again when she saw the gathering in his admittedly crowded living room, then again when she saw Princess Luna. She gave a short, uncertain bow and walked in. “Oh, and I have a gift for you.” He decided on the spot. He went over to his diminishing amount of boxes filled with pens, and took one. Vinyl looked at him with interest when he put the box in front of her. “Thanks for the tickets.”
Her eyes lit up when she opened the box and saw the pen inside. He could imagine that it would be put to good use in her possession.
When she smiled at him, he once again felt the waves of pure joy surge through him. It was an odd feeling, kind of dazing. He was barely aware of Sombra telling him something, but was too occupied with looking at Vinyl as she took the pen out of its case and tried it out. ‘Thanks dude. I’m sure this will be useful, though I doubt it’s worth a couple of cheap tickets.’
“Don’t worry about it.” He brushed her off in his joy induced state. Sombra tried to get his attention a few more times, but Jax ignored him. He couldn’t remember a single time where listening to Sombra had turned into something positive. All he ever did was pull Jax’ mood down, and he wasn’t going to allow it this time. He was too damn happy.
“Discord, if you will.” He said to his pal. Discord simply snapped his claw, and there was the blackboard he had used so long ago to explain chaos magic and how Jax had landed in Equestria.
Jax quickly swiped it to get enough room. “So, any suggestions?”
“Oh, whoopee cushion on the throne, right in front of all the nobles!” Rainbow burst out instantly. “It’s a classic.”
Jax hesitated. “Really Rainbow? Whoopee cushion? I thought you were a pro at this.” Even Jax knew that it was a lame prank, and that wasn’t exactly what they were going for here… harmless as it may be.
“Step aside, let a real pro take over.” Discord shooed Rainbow away from the spotlight that came from somewhere, making her look pretty offended. “How about this: A bubble bath bomb that literally explodes in a bubbly explosion so large that it will keep growing and picking up ponies along the way until they all end up outside the castle.”
“Oh! Not bad.” Jax started writing it down. “Not bad at all Discord… although… property damage and what about the ponies that end up being thrown out of windows and balconies?”
“With Discord’s magic, such a thing can be easily countered.” Luna spoke up. “And it does sound humorous. But how about this: We give her a reason to use the bubble bath bomb. I can clearly remember her throwing me in the moat of the castle, and I never received the sweet taste of revenge that was rightfully mine.” Luna smiled wickedly at the thought of happenings that must have been over a thousand years ago.
“Canterlot Castle doesn’t even have a moat silly.” Pinkie berated her with a smile, before a gasp took over. “Unless we make one! And fill it with cream! Mmmm… cream….”
Jax quickly wrote down the suggestions. “Alright… sounds good, though we have to make sure she falls in by herself somehow, and between her wings and her magic, that might be hard. And… is it hard swimming in cream? Anybody know?” Silence and blank looks met him. “Alright, better be careful with that then. What else?”
“Oh! Oh! I got it!” Rainbow looked extra excited at redeeming herself. “You know how Twilight still sends her letters now and again? Well we fake a whole lot of them and then have Spike send it to her, until she is literally swarmed!”
“Alright! That’s more like it!” Jax wrote it down along with the other suggestions. “Though I don’t know what the consequence of using Spike for it could be. Does he have a limit on how many letters he can send? Does it hurt him to send too many?” He looked at Discord. He would probably have to do most of the work in most of these suggestions. He hadn’t seen him do an awful lot, but according to Twilight he could make clouds rain chocolate milk and mess up gravity… “Are you up for doing some extra work?”
Discord gave him a relaxed smile and wave of his paw. “This is nothing.”
“Alright then. Let’s figure out which ones to use beside the moat and bubble-bath thingy…”
‘All of them sound good.’ Somepony wrote on the blackboard with magic. He turned around to see Vinyl giving him an excited smile.
“All of them?” He asked.
“All of them!” Pinkie smashed her hoof on the table, a little too hard for Jax’ liking.
He looked around at the hungry stares of most of the creatures there. Only Fluttershy and Moondancer seemed uncertain. “Alright, all of them it is. Let’s figure out how to do this.”
***
Celestia was having a pleasant day so far. Most of her day had been pretty boring, but while she had been looking over some documents in her study, Luna had come in and announced she was leaving to go visit a psychologist. Celestia couldn’t imagine better news…. she had wiped the slate mostly clean with the elements of harmony, but the scars were still there, and a psychologist could help with that. When she had tried to talk Luna into it shortly after her return, she had reacted rather negatively to it, so Celestia had dropped it. Even though she had cleared the air about some things about their relationship back before Nightmare Moon, she was still certain that a psychologist could help her. And now she was going to see one. It was, simply put, amazing.
Couple that with the apology she received from Jax that allowed her to tease her dear little sister, and she felt pretty light, like the burden she had on her withers had lessened.
Luna had yet to return from Ponyville, even though she had Night Court soon. If she was skipping it once more to spend time with Jax, Celestia would have to have a word with her, psychologist or no. Court was the one time they had reserved time just for their little ponies to come directly to their Princesses with any and all problems they could have, even though it would be infinitely easier for Celestia to let the existing Equestrian court handle them. Sometimes she had to send the petitioners there anyway, if a case would become too time-consuming, or was too complicated to handle in a single sitting. There was no real need for them to have open court.
But Celestia have found over the centuries that it did both her, and her subjects, a lot of good to meet like that. This way she didn’t lose touch of why she was still ruling them, even after all these years. The burden of all those lonely years weighed heavily upon her, not as badly now as it did before her talks with Luna, but it was still there. Talking with, and helping her little ponies was one way to lift the burden just a little. In return, her ponies felt how much she cared about them.
She rose from her chair, stretching her back. Even with a lot of work sent Luna’s way, it was still a lot to go through. “Raven?”
“Yes, your highness?” Raven instantly appeared by her side.
“Make sure these-“ she indicated a large stack of papers she was done with, “get to the right ponies. I am going to lower the sun, and then relax in my room for a while.”
“Yes, your highness.” No matter how many times Celestia tells her to relax a bit more, Raven insists on proper decorum. Raven and almost every other pony in existence. Celestia was tired of it after a century, but she had appreciated it for a long while after Luna’s… banishment. She hadn’t been in the best of moods back then, and the decorum had helped her distance herself from her subjects. Her emotional wounds had healed enough that she tired of it again after three centuries. She had learned to accept it… for the most part. Some ponies just couldn’t get past the fact that she was a princess, and so they did what they were raised to do, which meant bows and ‘your highness’es. Especially nobility was terrible at being relaxed around her.
Celestia left the room and started her trek towards the balcony. She should have put the study, balcony, and her bedroom closer to each other when she designed the place… then again, walking was good for her. She should walk more. A few walks around Canterlot when she had the time would be good for her.
Now she just needed to figure out how to gain that time….
She had just rounded a corner when she slipped. She landed on her rear, and just kept gliding forwards at a surprising speed on the slippery floor, past the point where momentum should have given up. She was just about to spread her wings to stop whatever was going on, when she glided into something that looked like string set up in the corridor, which somehow tangled around her in a way that made it impossible to spread her wings. Hey eyes widened as she saw a door ahead, and her mind refused to work properly under the suddenness of the situation, which was ridiculous. She had dealt with worse situations with a quicker wit.
Was she getting old?
The thought almost hurt more than smashing into the door which turned out to have been ajar and simply gave way to allow her continued floor-gliding. A bucket fell from above when the door opened, landing on her head and coating her head with some kind of slime before it fell off. She shook off most of the slime, but it just didn’t want to get off her horn-
Her horn! She quickly prepared a teleport spell that would teleport her out of the string that was weirdly restricting, and away from the floor that was weirdly slippery. The spell, however, was stopped because it couldn’t leave her horn… the slime. Of course.
It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Discord was behind this. She would have words with him later.
She was just thinking about how harsh she should be – to go to Fluttershy or handle it herself- when she arrived at the end of the room (Was this Luna’s room?), slid out of the open balcony door, and off the edge because the railing was conspicuously missing.
Her eyes widened again and she gasped as the feeling of falling overtook her. She instinctively tried to spread her wings again, but the string just tightened.
She looked down to calculate how much pain she would be in, only to be met with a moat filled with some sort of white liquid.
She wasn’t sure what surprised her most. That they had a moat, or that the string disappeared just before she landed in it, making her wings spring out like a… well, spring, just centimeters above it
“Odd…” she said mostly to herself. Discord was not the type of creature to stop a prank half-
Something impacted hard with her head – the bucket, she realized by shape, sound, and material – which made her miss a wingbeat which in turn meant that she ended up in the moat anyway.
Cream, she realized. It was cream, and cream was surprisingly easy to swim in. It seemed that she had something new to learn, even after all this time.
Whatever had been on her horn had disappeared, it seemed. She didn’t waste too much time teleporting back into her bathroom, directly into the large bathtub. Cream may be easy to swim in, but it did not feel nice in her coat and mane.
She would deal with the moat later. It was probably already gone… a Princess could hope. It would make this all easier.
She sighed, then rolled her withers. She needed to relax. She meant to just take a quick shower and then get Discord, but if she met Discord while annoyed, he would just make her lose her composure, and he loved when he succeeded in that.
A quick shower to get off the cream, and then a short bubble bath to- wait. Wait a minute. Discord isn’t here laughing at her.
The prank isn’t over yet.
She was completely frozen, reaching for the tap. He would have foreseen that she would teleport to her room, that was why the slime had disappeared. So she could do what he knew she would do.
She needed a shower, but this one was most likely trapped.
Or was it? There was an easy way to check. Everything Discord touched with his magic was easily recognizable by the chaos magic left behind.
She prepared the scanning spell, and let it run over the bathroom. Nothing out of-
The moment her spell checked the tap, it turned on, cascading her with water, turned off almost instantly but somehow still filled the bathtub with water, and plopped in a bubble bath bomb before she could as much as get her bearings. She really was getting old, wasn’t she?
She took a deep breath and held it, knowing that something would happen.
An explosion of sorts, that’s what happened. The bubbles kept coming, pushing her out of her bathroom, her room, and down the corridor. She let go of breath when she realized her head stayed over the bubbles.
She yelped as it looked like she was going to smash into the end of the corridor, but the bubbles seemed to have a life on their own, and swept her around the bend without hurting her, or any of the other ponies caught in the bubblesplotion. Now that she knew that Discord at least had no intention of hurting any of her ponies, she let go of the knot in her stomach. This was actually sort of fun, being swept forward by bubbles.
She started laughing a bit. It was certainly new. The castle was very much on a routine, not much changed, but this was… refreshing. Her laughter turned into full on glee when she saw Baron McGrumpy Face (at least that was what he should have been named). For once he had something other than a frown on his face, being that of shock at seeing Celestia ride a wave of bubbles towards him, laughing hysterically.
Refreshing indeed. Maybe letting Discord go a little wild now and again wasn’t such a bad idea. He was a creature of chaos after all, he must be frightfully bored. Couldn’t have that.
The fun ended in front of the castle gates, or so she thought at least. She just managed to get up on all fours and note that her new moat was gone, before she heard a snap and it started raining scrolls. Specifically the type Twilight always wrote to her. One of them hit her on the head, as gently as a raindrop, and fell to the ground. She smiled as she picked one of them up and unscrolled it, taking note of all the ponies around her that had been swept up with her.
‘Rainbow Dash Rocks!’ It simply stated boldly. Either Twilight had decided to change how she usually writes to her, Discord had taken a new liking to Rainbow Dash, or more ponies were in on this than she realized.
The scrolls from the area swarmed towards and over her in a swarm, but she wasn’t afraid of being drowned in them. She was sure now that nopony would get hurt tonight.
She practically floated up to the top of them, still smiling, wondering what would come next. Her staff and guards looked at her near panic, but she just waved to them. She would have to remember to invite Discord to the next Galloping Gala, that event needed some refreshment for sure.
All the scrolls disappeared as quickly as they had come. She fell to the ground, not bothering to spread her wings, and fell on something soft and-
was that the sound of air escaping ringing behind her? She looked down at the giant whoopee-cushion she was on, completely baffled. She had not seen that coming. All the ponies around her looked as baffled as her, and a deep uncertain silence settled…
Until the sound of laughter rang from a few ponies from Celestia’s right. Discord was there of course, and Rainbow as she had expected. Pinkie wasn’t a surprise, and neither was Jax, along with a white mare she wasn’t sure- oh no, wait that was Vinyl Scratch, she had been at her birthday with Jax. What really surprised her was to see her own sister, Fluttershy, and Moondancer among them, the last two of whom just sniggered a bit while her sister laughed hard with the rest of them.
“All of that… and what really got her was the whoopee-cushion!” Jax got out between breaths.
“I told you guys!” Rainbow managed to say. “Didn’t I tell you? Classic!”
“Ohh yes! It’s good to see Celestia baffled! Good job Rainbow, give it here!” Discord bumped claw with hoof, before doubling over with laughter.
She finally realized that the whoopee cushion was still letting out air because she was just sitting there.
She finally got off, and made her way towards the group before pausing. How did she want to spin this?
She decided to have a little more fun and did something she hadn’t done in a long loooong time. “Discord…” she purred out. It came to her instinctually after that. The tilt of her head, the fluttering of her eyelashes. The laughter ceased immediately and they all looked at her in surprise. Discord’s jaw dropped down to the floor, especially when she sauntered over to them, making sure her backside swayed just the right amount. She hadn’t done that in ages, it felt almost freeing. She suppressed a giggle and continued with her plan when she stood in front of Discord.
“Doing so much work just to get my attention, I never knew you felt that way, Dissy.” Not the best nickname, but it was all she could think up at the moment. It seemed to work as he... he blushed! She had never seen Discord blush before, she didn’t even think he could.
“I-I dunno w-what-“ He was flustered! How cute! “D-Dissy? M-my Celestia, or should I call you Celly since we’re giving nicknames?” He was trying to get back, but he was only helping her.
“My indeed!” She pretended to be surprised. “How forward of you to give me a nickname already!”
“But you just-!” He tried to defend himself. She managed to hide most of her glee of, for once to be the one who used logic that the other didn’t quite understand.
“Shh…” She put a hoof on his mouth. “You’ve already got me interested. Pick me up tomorrow at eight.” She winked at him before turning around and walking up to her balcony to finally lower the sun, making sure to sway her rear just right.
“D-did… was she serious?” Discord asked behind her, sounding lost.
Laughter burst out like a sudden storm, much crazier than the one she had received.
“Yeah, she totally was! Let’s get you a suit while we have the time!” Rainbow’s voice reached her. She heard at least three creatures falling to the floor, laughing all the while.
She managed to keep her own laughter in until she reached the castle, but then she couldn’t take it anymore. That had been fun, more fun than she had had in a long time.
Maybe having a date with Discord wouldn’t be such a bad idea.