//------------------------------// // 30. Forgiveness // Story: Trials of a Royal Guard // by Anzel //------------------------------// The palace’s plush red carpet felt odd under my bare hooves. Not that it had changed since I’d been gone, but most of my time spent here was in hoofguards. That and I’d never really thought of the palace as much more than where I worked. Now I was an outsider. Neither a House nor Royal Guard. I was just Mr. Knight, medically discharged former officer… MDFO. Although I guess that tale hadn’t gotten around yet since the fluttering yellow pegasus guard in front of me had thought I was still a major. She seemed ill-suited for guard duty, as she was far more svelte than what would be expected of most recruits. Then again, it made some sense. Most of the best soldiers had gone to Nordanver long ago. As we made our way through the palace, most of the guards stiffened to attention even though I wasn’t in uniform… or an officer. What was peculiar was that I recognized so few and yet they knew me. Images take a while to die, I suppose. Eventually, we reached Princess Celestia’s wing and made our way to her office door. The mare stopped and asked, “Could you just wait here a second? I need to get the captain before you go in.” “No problem.” The pegasus disappeared inside and a moment later, the door swung open and Sunny Day bounded out. “Silent Knight!” The pegasus mare squeaked and fluttered out in the opposite direction. Sunny charged towards to me but slid to a stop before we collided. Her eyes narrowed briefly and she warned, “Don’t move.” Her horn lit up and tiny little bursts of energy shot out and exploded over my head. It took a lot of resolve and trust not to duck. This was Sunny, though… so I felt completely safe from malicious acts and moderately safe from accidental ones. Once she had completed her firework display, she happily crossed the small bit of carpet between us, stood on her hind legs, and threw her forehooves open wide. As I went to hug her, she bumped her belly into my face and started swatting over my head. “Have you gone mad? What are you doing?” “Tidying up! Just give me a second, okay?” It was a tough request to comply with while her tummy bumped and smooshed my face. Eventually, she dropped down and hugged me properly. “I’m upset with you! You’ve been home for a while and you haven’t come to see me. Azurite has seen you more than I have!” “Azurite spends a lot of time in the places I do. You haven’t come to see me, either, you know.” Sunny huffed and ran her hooves through my mane, messing it up as much as she could. “I’m the leader of a House Guard and kind of busy with a bunch of green ponies running all over this palace. You’re right, though. We’ll just agree that we’re both in the wrong and start hanging out more.” She sighed and left my mane alone, satisfied with her work. “The mare you picked to replace you is a buzz kill. She doesn’t drink, she doesn’t go out, she doesn’t bend the rules. I miss you.” “I miss you, too,” I replied, doing my best to make my mane presentable for the princess. “So… what is this all about?” “She missed you, too.” “Oh yeah? The last time I was here she was quite upset with me.” Sunny poked my chest with a hoof. “WE were quite upset with you. Still, you know better than most that she is the most forgiving pony in the world. She missed you and she wants to see you. Come on.” The golden mare grabbed my hoof and tugged me through the wide open door. It had been open the whole time so I had little doubt that anypony inside had heard our entire exchange. Especially considering how loud Sunny talked. “Princess Celestia, I’d like to present to you: Major Knight.” The princess was sitting behind her desk. It was covered in scrolls, letters, and documents. The bookshelf behind her was filled and overflowing. Many of the spines listed topics about war, gryphons, and diplomacy. She’d been studying, or still was. “Silent Knight, I saw you in the crowd. Thank you so much for coming,” she said with a smile. I trotted to the front of her desk and bowed. “I couldn’t refuse such a generous offer.” The alicorn waved a hoof at me. “I see you still have a bit of charm. Though, forgive me for saying so, but you look… worn.” Did I? Probably so. I was accustomed to looking at myself in the mirror. She hadn’t seen me in two years. I guess the slow, subtle changes would be in stark contrast to her memory. Princess Celestia, of course, looked almost exactly the same as the day she’d sat there disapprovingly. A beautiful, ageless, pristine mare. The only difference was that she was letting her mane show more pink. “It was a difficult few years, Princess. I’m afraid they took their toll. Though I’m pleased to see that you look as beautiful as ever.” “More flattery,” she said, setting her elbows on her desk. “Well, thank you for coming. This meeting was long overdue. Too long, actually, and that is my fault. Certainly you understand, though. Silent Knight, I owe you an apology.” My ears stood up tall. “Pardon?” “The last time you were here, I was very upset. Upset at you, upset at Luna, and upset at what we were facing. I took a lot of it out on you and I shouldn’t have. You just did what you thought you had to do. It was misguided, it wasn’t the correct method, but I should not have acted so hastily in anger. “I said many things that I should have not. You were already suffering from what you’d done and I simply made it worse. I pushed when I should have pulled. I’ve made amends with Luna but I’ve not had the luxury of doing so with you. I am truly sorry.” It was stunning. She was apologizing to me? To me? I stammered, “No, Princess… I… it is okay. You were right.” The princess shook her head. “No, I was correct. I was not right. There is a difference, you know.” She smiled weakly. “I’m beyond glad you’re home safe. In truth, I’ve harbored guilt that perhaps you went because of what happened here. Forgive me.” For some reason, that sentiment hit me hard. My forehoof trembled. “Princess… no. Thank you, but no. There is nothing to forgive. It was my duty. To other ponies, to you, to the kingdom. If all had gone well, I’d have still gone. Though perhaps not out of my own shame and guilt. But that had nothing to do with you!” “Doesn’t it?” she whispered before rising and walking around her desk. The princess settled in front of me and looped a hoof behind my head. With more strength than I’d have given her credit for, she pulled me up against her chest and squeezed as if she’d never let me go again. “Thank you for that. Thank you for coming back.” The hairs of her coat were so soft on my face. I settled my hooves on her and nuzzled. She’d held me a few times in my career and it was always comforting. Comforting and overwhelming. Today, it was so overwhelming. It took a few moments to recognize that the warmth on my cheeks was my own tears. We lingered there until I felt somepony bump into my back and another set of hooves wrap around me. It was Sunny. I’d been so taken aback by the apology I’d forgotten she was in the room. She was sniffling a bit as she laid her head against my back. “You’re not allowed to leave again.” “Agreed, you belong here,” the princess said. “Don’t worry, there is no chance of me leaving Canterlot. Especially now,” I replied, doing my best to hide the fact I was crying from creeping into my voice. “What does that mean?” Sunny asked as she nuzzled into the back of my neck. “I resigned a few days ago. I had a disagreement with the medical board and their treatment of veterans, so I resigned.” “What?!” Sunny exclaimed as she let me go. “You can’t just resign!” Princess Celestia softly stroked my ears. “I disagree, Sunny. He can if he wants. He’s done enough.” Sunny grabbed my tail and started to tug me away from the princess. “No, ma’am. No he can’t. Silent Knight is a Royal Guard. Not a… vagrant, unemployed, pet stallion.” The princess’s hooves found my forehooves as Sunny tried to drag me away. She held on strongly and pulled me back her way. “He is a pony that has been through a lot and has earned his peace. He is not a vagrant, Sunny!” “Let him go! I’m taking him back,” Sunny squealed as she continued to tug my tail. My hind legs just sort of dragged with my rump while I stretched out further, my forehooves in Princess Celestia’s. “I will not! I’m going to hold him for a while and then send him home to his wife. You will not take him anywhere!” She pulled me a bit closer, overpowering Sunny, and then lit her horn. A bubble encircled the golden mare and my rump, lifting both off the carpet. “Not fair! No magic!” “I am the princess!” “Uh… ladies. Do I perhaps get a say in what is happening?” Sunny tugged my tail. “No! You don’t know what is best for you. I do. You’re a royal guard.” Princess Celestia levitated the bubble closer so she could get a hoof around my back even though my rump was higher than my head. She held me protectively. “You do not. I do. He needs rest and reintegration, and if he disagrees with the medical board, we should investigate it.” “Well, obviously! That isn’t in question here. Once that is done, though, we need to get Silent Knight back to where he wants to be: in the Guard.” “He obviously doesn’t want to be in the Guard!” Princess Celestia replied, tugging me tightly against her chest. “Right, Silent Knight?” “Right,” I replied. Not with conviction, however, because I’d wanted to be in the Guard forever. At the same time, you don’t disagree with a princess that has your flank in the air. “Liar! Don’t just agree with her because she’s a big, scary alicorn. I thought you had more of a spine than that, Silent.” The spine in question was currently bent in an uncomfortable way. It was so strange to see that here in the palace, everything was just like I remembered it. Sunny Day was always a ray of sunshine and her professionalism with Princess Celestia was still lacking. Princess Luna and I had had more of a mother-and-son dynamic. These two worked better on an older sister, younger sister level. Some of the things that came out of Sunny’s mouth would normally get an officer fired. Like today… I’d have fired her. Princess Celestia preferred this, though. Despite the familiarity, there was a slight change to the normalcy. Princess Celestia had been suffering from guilt just like me and was now being as aggressively protective as Princess Luna. It was so odd to see things mostly how they used to be. Odd but wonderful. Perhaps not everything changed so dramatically. Sunny tugged on my tail in the bubble. “Hello, Silent Knight? I’m challenging your spine here. Get all indignant, tell me you have a spine, and let’s go sort this out. I’ll find you some armor.” “I’m not fit for duty, Sunny,” my mouth said before I could really think it over. The tugging on my tail stopped. “Huh?” “Just because I disagreed with the way the medical board treated me doesn’t mean they weren’t accurate in their assessment. I’ve got issues. I wouldn’t put me in command of anything yet. I’m sorry, Sunny, but we can’t just go and put me in a uniform.” My rump suddenly flopped to the floor as the bubble disappeared. Sunny squealed in surprise as she was unceremoniously dumped as well. She set a hoof on my back. “Then we’ll get you help and then the uniform.” Princess Celestia sighed. “Sunny, I’m not sure that is what he wants. What do you want, Silent Knight?” What did I want? Just to be normal again. To pretend like the last two years hadn’t happened. That wasn’t what she meant, though. “I’m not sure, Princess. Being a Royal Guard is the only thing I knew how to do, but I was really upset by the treatment. I couldn’t stand for it.” “Well, perhaps you should take some time to think about it. Sunny may wish to act quickly and passionately, but that is not your style. I’m certain you’ll discover your true goal.” Sunny just snorted and folded her forehooves. “Don’t be all smug about it. He’ll be a guard again. I bet you a month’s salary.” Princess Celestia shook her head. “No, what use would I have with your bits? If you’re going to bet, bet like the brave mare you are. How about a month’s worth of actual obedience to your princess?” Sunny gasped. “You wouldn’t! How dare you! I— wait… this street goes two ways, Princess. If he does go back and I win, what do I get?” Princess Celestia softly stroked through my mane as she pondered the question. I just settled where I was. Only a foolish stallion turns down being pet by an alicorn. “If you win, I will personally take you, Azurite, and Soarin to the beach for two weeks. A complete vacation, but I’ll be nearby so you don’t have to fuss and worry the whole time.” “No deal! I can do that on leave and I don’t worry and fuss that much. Here’s the deal: you take us, you wear an ugly bikini the whole time, and you let Azurite ride around on your back.” My eyes flicked up to see Princess Celestia glare. Sunny was glaring, too. Defiantly. The look between them was terrifying. “Very well, but when I win, I expect complete obedience. You’ll act like Silent Knight for a whole month. Minus the overzealous execution of threats, of course. No offense intended, Silent Knight.” I wasn’t sure if I should be offended or not… but she had said no offense intended. “Deal!” Sunny thrust her hoof to the alicorn. Princess Celestia bumped it. “The pact is sealed. Now, we’ll leave the outcome up to Silent Knight. For now, however, why don’t the three of us go enjoy some lunch? Would you like that, Silent Knight?” “Yes, Princess.” Unemployed stallions should never refuse lunch with princesses. “Good, I’ll have Raven set it up. Come along.” As the Princess and Sunny wandered out of the office, lightly bickering about their bet, I couldn’t help but smile. They were the same. Mostly. Life was the same here. Before we sat for lunch, I should really clean my face up though. Tears are not becoming of MDFOs. ☾ My whole vision was filled by cute-looking metal figures. Their heads were too large for their bodies and all of their features were exceedingly rounded and exaggerated. From where my chin rested on the floor, they looked large. After I painted them, they’d all be brightly colored and even sillier looking. Without a doubt, I was going to paint the one with the lute like Dr. Kitty. She’d make a fine bard. The wizard would be Crystal. It didn’t really fit, but it was the prettiest figure. Azurite would be the rogue and I’d be the barbarian. Together, we’d roam about in dark dungeons, looking for bits and magic items. Our adversaries would be evil undead and other fantastic creatures. It was a classic dungeon delve and it looked like a lot of fun. There were even expansions so more ponies could play. Crystal trotted out of the guest bedroom that served as her office. Her head tilted as she looked at me splayed out on the floor. “What is this?” “I’m admiring my troops.” “Oh, I see. Well, they’re very cute.” I tapped the wizard. “This one is you.” Crystal circled it with her magic and levitated it up to her eye level. “Oh, she’s pretty. Good choice. Which one is you?” “That one.” I indicated the barbarian. “Ah, I see.” She levitated the wizard figure back down and made its nose touch the barbarian’s cheek. “Yup. She approves.” "A wizard and a barbarian, huh?” “Why not?” Crystal trotted over and flopped onto my back. She nuzzled between my ears. “Honey?” “Hmm?” “I know you’ve got a lot on your mind, but do you remember when you got back and I said I was looking at a house?” I’d forgotten! Wholly. At least until she said something. Yes, that was a conversation we’d had. An awkward one that had involved Princess Luna. “I do.” “I’ve been trying not to burden you with it, but can we go see it? I’m worried it won’t stay on the market too much longer.” Without much effort I stood up, lifting the little mare with me. She giggled as I did so and asked, “Is this a yes?” “It is. You ask for so little. I can go look at a house with you. When?” Idly, the mare rubbed a circle into the back of my neck. “I kind of made an appointment to see it in about an hour.” My ear flicked. “I see. Knew you’d get your way, did you? Well, we’d best get going, then.” Her forelegs looped around my neck and she hugged me tight. “Thank you for understanding.” “Sure thing, doll.” I trotted out of our condo with her on my back. When I got to the balcony out front, I threw my wings out. Crystal gasped and pushed them down with her hooves. “Silent, no! Winterspear says you can’t fly with a load.” That soured my good cheer a bit. “Well, Winterspear can just stop tattling.” I pulled my wings in tight and trotted us down the stairs. “Where to?” “The house is in Harmony Hamlet over on Storybrooke Lane.” My hooves shifted to head to the lower districts of the city. “Harmony Hamlet… what would your mother say?” Crystal huffed in my ear. “That should not concern us.” “Fair enough. To Harmony Hamlet we go!” I took off at a canter, carrying my wife away from central Canterlot and down a couple of districts. Harmony Hamlet was one of the older neighborhoods of Canterlot. Not in age, but in renovation. As one of the furthest locations from the palace, it had not seen the great boom of rebuilding and investment that the rest of the city had. Wealthy ponies that wanted to be as close to central Canterlot as possible had bought up the buildings nearby, renovated them with the familiar white stones, and turned them into mini-castles. This far out, there was a lot more wood still in use. Much of it had been well cared for, but it didn’t have the same pomp as the rest of the city. The ponies that lived here were typically not wealthy and didn’t want to live in the condo buildings available. I turned us down Storybrooke Lane and trotted along until Crystal pointed a hoof. “There it is! 1602. That’s the one!” She sounded so excited. It was somewhat surprising, as the house was not much to look at. It was small and quaint. Not much larger than the house I’d grown up in. The outside was dated and worn, with the white paint of the wood areas having faded and started peeling long ago. Past that, however, it seemed sturdy enough. There were two major parts: the main bit which was two stories tall and featured a sharp pointed roof, and then an addition that was clearly made later on. It was shorter and had a swept roof. “What do you think?” Crystal asked happily. “It looks like it needs a lot of work.” “Oh, it needs a ton. The inside is all original. It was well loved but well-worn, too. The family that owns it raised four generations of ponies here before deciding to move to Manehattan.” I trotted a bit closer, looking over the formerly white fence that sectioned off the small garden in front. A carpenter ant nibbled off a piece, saluted me with an antenna, and went on his way. “Why did they move?” “The current head of the family earned a big promotion and decided that it was worth the move. The house has just languished on the market because she didn’t want to sell to just anypony that would knock it down and build something new. “That, and the fact that nopony wants to renovate this style of home. Both peak and swept roofs have been out for years. Plus, all of this wood. Isn’t the cutest little thing, Silent?” Cute wasn’t the word I’d use. Bit-trap, old, worn out… those words came to mind. Though, that wasn’t the house's fault. It could still do its job if somepony would just give it a chance. “I think it is great if Crystal Wishes can handle the social blow of living in it.” Crystal slipped off my back and kissed my cheek. “Oh, pish posh! I love it and I’m not going to buy a house based on what other ponies think. Now, while we wait on the realtor, let me tell you some more interesting facts about this house. “You can’t see it from the road but there is actually a little back yard! We’d own land. Enough land to plant one big or two medium trees! Then, that big window up there doesn’t go to a second floor. There isn’t one. It is just to let more light into the living space. There is a pegasus loft, though. “There are four bedrooms, three bathrooms, and—“ As Crystal rattled off a list of facts and figures, I just smiled and nodded. I honestly didn’t care about the details. This house made her happy. That was all that mattered. If I could sleep in a tent with smelly, snoring soldier ponies, I could sleep in a house that was a little old. It was also something I could work on. I was handy enough and knew how to read a book. This could be a project to keep me busy. A true labor of love. Crystal just kept on talking so I reached down, grabbed her hoof, and squeezed it. “We can wait for the realtor, but I don’t need to see the inside. Let’s buy the house.” She gasped. “Really? Silent, really!” I nodded. The mare threw her hooves around me and squeezed. “Oh my gosh! This is so exciting! We’re going to have a house. You and me!” Yes, we were. A beautiful little house for a beautiful little mare and her stallion. Together, we could turn it into our dream home. I’d even go ask that ant for the piece of our fence back if she wanted me to. It would be a good project to keep me busy. I nodded and bumped my head to hers. “You and me.”