When you open your eyes, the light stabs you in the eye sockets. You groan, feeling the dryness in your mouth. The alarm on your bedside screams at a decibel that makes your ears feel as if they're bleeding. Your stomach churns as you try to take in your surroundings.
Let's see... it's almost noon. You're home. Plus, you’re in bed. Good. You move an arm and you find yourself clothed. That’s also a good start.
Hold on. Wait a minute, what's this? This is a hoof. Why is there a hoof? You don’t have hooves. Why is it holding onto you?
Your eyes shoot open and you look down at you. A light blue hoof clings to your torso.
You look down at your clothes, then over to Rainbow Dash. Wait a second. Clothes on. Plus, pony in bed. One plus one equals...
"Oh, thank god. We didn't do it," you mutter to yourself.
You gently lift her hoof off you and head to the window, pulling the blinds, cursing Celestia's sunlight for everything it stands for. Your head screams in anger as you shuffle to the bathroom.
God, you and Rainbow must have really drunk too much. What even happened last night? Hopefully you didn’t do anything too rough or illegal. Again. All you remember is delivering some sweet burn to the bartender last night, and you were going to hang out with Rainbow all day today.
However, there's no sense in doing it on a empty stomach or with a massive hangover. You grab the glass that you keep by the sink in your bathroom, pour some water, and take two pony strength aspirin. Then, grabbing two more and filling the glass with water again, you take them and place them at the bedside table beside Rainbow Dash.
Then, you take a moment to look down at her. There she is, lying in your bed, snoring lightly. Her right ear twitches occasionally as she sleeps, and she might be drooling on your favorite pillow.
You know what would be great? Dumping a pail of water on her. Oh man! You'd get her so good! Oh man, it would be classic! You even have a pail downstairs that you could fill in the sink. It would mess up the mattress, but it would be totally worth it.
However, as someone currently suffering from a hangover, you'd be out for blood if that happened to you. Therefore, you'll catalogue that idea for a different day. When she’d least expect it.
Stepping away, you head downstairs and turn on your oven. You grab some eggs from the fridge and some bread from your pantry. After lightly oiling a pan and popping down some toast, you whip the eggs and dump them into the pan with some milk and cheese. The smell of breakfast fills the whole kitchen as you push the eggs around in the pan, and the toast pops up. You take the eggs off heat, pour them onto two plates, and lightly butter the toast before adding them as well.
Grabbing the two plates and a couple forks, you walk upstairs and head into your bedroom. Rainbow gently stirs from her slumber, and you move to sit on the non-pony occupied side of the bed.
Rainbow's eyes open, and a flicker of pain runs across her face as she places a hoof to her head.
"Uuugh," she says. "Stupid dream."
"Morning, Sleepyhead," you say.
Her eyes shoot open and stare directly at you. Then, she looks down to herself. Then the covers. Then to the clock.
"I'm still not dreaming?" she asks, horrified.
"Nope," you say, holding out a plate. "Breakfast?"
She sits up in bed, holding her head with a hoof.
"Uhm, thanks. Got any aspirin?" she asks, taking the plate.
"On the table by you."
She looks to her side and takes the two aspirin before downing them with some water.
"So, uh," she says, taking a fork and dishing some food.
"Yeah?" you ask, taking a bite of your food.
"Did we... uh," she asks.
"Nah," you say.
She lets out a sigh of relief.
"Thank Celestia," she says to herself.
"What? Are you saying I wouldn't be good in bed?" you ask.
She looks back up at you, horrified.
"What!? I never... I- That wasn't what I-"
You laugh before waving at her.
"I'm just messing with you, Dash. Lighten up," you say.
She smiles lightly and chuckles, looking back down to her food. She digs in along with you, and soon you're taking the two empty plates away.
"How's the hangover?" you ask.
"Not the worst I've ever had. But half of it was probably the way I woke up."
You snicker to her.
"Psh, I had no idea waking up next to me was such a bad thing."
Rainbow opens her mouth to reply, but opts to not respond. Instead, she gets out of bed and follows you downstairs to help with the dishes.
"So, what do you wanna do today?" you ask, scrubbing the dishes while she rinses. "I'm up for anything."
Rainbow shrugs, stretching each of her limbs.
"Well, I wouldn't mind going on a walk. There's this movie I've kinda wanted to see, but I hate going to the theater alone. Oh! And, I need to stop at the Library to pick up a book from Twilight. She just got the most recent Daring Doo book in and she promised she'd let me read it first!"
"Hey, I like all of those ideas. We might as well do them all. It’s way better than the ideas I had for my day off."
She turns to you, giving you a smug grin.
"What? Napping and eating ice cream?"
"No, no. That's my life plan. I'm talking about my plan for today. That involved way more 'Anon Time'."
She laughs to herself, shaking her head.
"'Anon Time' eh?" she remarks. "That's gross, Anon. Don't be gross."
"I am who I am. You cannot change someone as great as I. Give me freedom, or..." you point to a plate on Rainbow's side of the counter. "Give me that plate over there. I think I forgot to clean it a few days ago."
She hands the plate to you and you wash off the last of the dishes as she dries them.
"There! That's done. So then! How about that walk?" you ask.
"Sure, why not? Wanna go around the lake?"
"Yeah, why not? That sounds nice."
You head to the door and hold it open wide.
"After you, Mi'lady."
"I will end you," Rainbow responds, standing in place.
"Just go," you smile.
"Fine, jeez," she groans, exiting your home. You follow behind her, locking up on your way out.