“What would you say, Zodiac?”
“I would say she suffered a logic bomb. I would say we’ve all had one at some point, and I haven’t seen either her or her pink earth pony friend before.”
“So what do you think she is? Unicorn or pegasus?”
“I would say I don’t know; in either case, this is some incredible work. I would say even Cloudstitch wouldn’t be able to tell.”
“Well what do I do with that earth pony friend of hers waiting outside?”
“Show her around. Treat her to breakfast, if you like. I would say I need some time with this one; she could prove to be a valuable addition to our society.”
“Understood, sire.”
Twilight hears the clip-clop of hooves leaving her room as she rubs her eyes and sits up. She is in her bed in Utopia’s inn, with a charcoal-grey unicorn standing at the room’s entrance … and then she notices his wings …
“You’re … an alicorn?”
The grey pony promptly responds, “I would say I’m as much an alicorn as you are, miss …”
“Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship.” Her use of the word ‘princess’ causes the stranger to look her appearance over a second time.
“So, you fancy yourself a true alicorn, eh? I don’t suppose you can prove this claim.”
“Well …” Twilight flaps her wings and slowly rises into the air. Her horn emits a low brightness as a pillow levitates up to her. The combination of these mundane tasks catches the stranger off-guard as he stammers in his response.
“Whoa, you really are … I mean, my apologies, Your Highness. I, I did not intend to impugn the word of … oh, this is most embarrassing.”
“It’s quite all right,” Twilight soothingly replies as she floats back down to the bed and stands eye-to-eye with the stranger. “But, I’m surprised that you’re so surprised. I mean, you’re an alicorn, too … right.”
The stranger looks over his forehoof, then walks over to the room’s entrance and closes the door. He turns back to Twilight before responding. “What I am about to show you, I must ask that you never reveal to anypony else. Can you promise me that?”
“I can Pinkie-promise if you like,” Twilight happily replies.
“I do not know what that means, but I believe I can trust you.” Taking one last look to the closed door, the stranger turns to face Twilight. A glow emanates from his horn, and the wings on his body come off and levitate into the air. Twilight can only gape as the wings hover for many seconds, before returning to their placement on the pony’s body.
“So … those wings are fake? I don’t understand; why go around pretending to be an alicorn.”
“There is much that I need to explain to you, Princess Twilight Sparkle.”
“Just call me Twilight; I’m still not used to the whole ‘princess’ thing.”
“Very well,” the grey unicorn responds. “My name is Zodiac, and I am a member of the Alicorn Society.”
“The what?”
“The Alicorn Society consists of a select group of unicorns and pegasi, from both Utopia and Paradise. Our goal is to maintain the harmony that exists between unicorns and pegasi in these towns, mostly by setting a higher standard of conduct.”
Twilight eyes Zodiac quizzically. “I don’t understand. Why would there be a need for policing harmony?”
“Based on recent events, I assume you are familiar with the history of the twin towns.” After Twilight nods, Zodiac continues: “Even after the mixing of the two pony types between our fair towns, there resided an air of contempt for pegasi residing in Utopia, and vice versa. There were many arguments, and grudges persisted between neighbors. Then Cloudstitch showed us a better way.”
“Who is this ‘Cloudstitch’?”
“One of the most logical thinkers in all of Equestria … and an incredible seamstress. She recruited a number of our brightest and most rational, myself included, and brought us to her home. There, she showed off a pair of prosthetic wings … the very wings that you see me wear today. She also displayed a vast array of carefully-designed horns. Both the wings and horns, when attached, were practically indistinguishable from the real thing.”
“Her idea was simple: give select unicorns a custom-made pair of wings, and give select pegasi a custom-made horn. Then, have those chosen ponies mingle among the townsfolk in both towns, setting a standard of tolerance and friendliness. Aid those in need, settle disputes calmly and rationally … act like you would like others to act, basically.”
“Mostly, though, the reason for the wings and horns was to promote tolerance towards the ‘alicorns’ themselves. Though thoroughly rational in thought, many chosen still harbored deep resent for ‘the wrong kind’ … but if one couldn’t tell unicorn from pegasus among his or her fellow alicorns, one couldn’t harbor any latent hatred.”
Silence pervaded for many seconds. After taking in Zodiac’s story, Twilight finally responded.
“I have to say, this is one of the most unusual ideas I’ve ever come across … and yet so incredible. But has it worked?”
“It’s been many moons now since this all began, and the results speak for themselves. This is an idyllic community now, along with Paradise. No more arguments, no more dissention. And I must say, we’re very proud of what we’ve accomplished.”
“So this ‘Cloudstitch’,” Twilight continues, “is there a chance I could meet her?”
“As a matter of fact, I wish to introduce you to her … but first, you will have to pass a test.”
Twilight starts bouncing in her bed, giddy with anticipation. “Ooo, ooo, when can we start? Can we do this now? This is gonna be awesome!”
“I must say,” Zodiac notes, “I’ve never had that kind of reaction upon informing somepony of a test.”
After watching Pinkie Pie devour a bowl of oatmeal in her usual, head-in-the-bowl fashion, her silver ‘alicorn’ companion cannot help but comment: “I would say that I’ve never met anyone quite with your, shall we say, dining etiquette.”
Wiping drops of mush from her muzzle with her forehoof, Pinkie responds, “What can I say, I’m one-of-a-kind.” Shrugging off what sounds like a mutter of ‘Thank Equestria’, she then asks, “So what’s your name, anyway? I never got it.”
“I would say my name is Spiral.”
“OK,” Pinkie replies, “but is that really your name?”
“I would say that, yes, Spiral is my name.”
Pinkie looks at the ‘alicorn’ with a blank expression before asking, “What is with you using the phrase ‘I would say’ all the time? It seems weird, and boy do I know about weird!”
“Well,” Spiral starts, “are you familiar with the history of our towns?”
“Twilight told me all about how all you ponies are all either truthful or liars. That’s why I can’t tell whether you’re lying now or not, especially when you start each sentence with ‘I would say’.”
“But I would say that’s the point. I would say all of the following: take any true sentence, like ‘Your name is Pinkie Pie.’ If I am truthful, then I would say such a statement; if, however, I am a liar, then I would not say such a statement … but then saying I would say that statement is itself a lie, which forces that statement to be true. You see?”
“Oh I see fine,” Pinkie replies. “I hear very well too, and have a great sense of smell. But I don’t understand a single thing you just said!”
“Perhaps we should start over,” Spiral states. “I would say my name is Spiral. Now then, what would you say if I were telling you the truth?”
“If you’re telling the truth, then your name is Spiral. I get that.”
“Excellent. Now, what if my statement was a lie? What would that tell you?”
“That would tell me that your name isn’t Spiral,” Pinkie innocently replied. The ‘alicorn’ shook her head before explaining.
“Again, I would say all of the following: if I am a liar, then the statement ‘I would say my name is Spiral’ would be a lie. That would mean I would not say my name is Spiral. But that, in turn, would mean that my name IS Spiral, since I would ‘not’ say any true statement. Thus, my name must be Spiral, whether or not I am truthful.”
Pinkie let the explanation take hold in her head for some time. “So … any time you begin a statement with ‘I would say’, that makes the thing you say true?”
“Inasmuch as I actually believe the sentence to be true, I would say yes.”
“And that’s true for all the inhabitants of Utopia and Paradise?”
“I would say yes, that is the case.”
“Well go figure … I guess I can figure!” Pinkie beams with a sense of pride as she starts bouncing in place.”
‘One-of-a-kind’ indeed!
Twilight eyes the solitary room Zodiac has led her to, thinking back to her study days back in Canterlot. In front of her is a single desk, with an ample supply of parchment and quills for scratchwork. Along the sides are bookshelves filled with dusty tomes. The lack of windows unnerves her slightly, but she trusts her guide not to have led her astray.
“Let me explain this test, Twilight.” The ‘true’ alicorn nods.
“Over many moons, some of our society brothers and sisters have formed close bonds. For this test, you will hear statements from 5 pairs of ponies. In each case, one is a unicorn and one is a pegasus. Either could come from Utopia or Paradise, and they could come from the same or different towns. As you know, unicorns from Utopia and pegasi from Paradise are truthful, while unicorns from Paradise and pegasi from Utopia lie. All you need to do is identify which pony is the unicorn and which is the pegasus. In some cases you will be able to identify place of residence for one or both; in other cases, you will not be able to do so.”
Twilight thinks to herself that Rarity would be likely to ace this quiz by simply spotting the real wings and horns from the fakes, but she also trusts her own ability to solve the ensuing puzzles. “I understand. I’m ready to begin.”
“Excellent,” Zodiac replies. “Write down your answers, and be prepared to explain your reasoning to me after everypony has given their statements. If you are as talented as I believe you to be, this should be no more than a formality.”
Zodiac leaves the room, and one by one, a pair of alicorn-looking ponies walk in to deliver statements. Twilight is amazed by each pair’s appearance, never being able to discern real horns from fake or real wings from fake; nonetheless, she takes it upon herself to stay with the logical facilities within her to solve each puzzle.
The first pair to enter are named White Rose and Blue Daffodil. White Rose states that she comes from Paradise, while Blue Daffodil states that she is a unicorn from Utopia.
The second pair to enter are named Haystack and Corn Sheaf. Each claims to be a unicorn. Haystack then states that the two come from different towns.
The third pair to enter are named Topaz and Amethyst. Topaz claims to be a pegasus, and Amethyst claims to be a unicorn. Topaz then states that the two come from the same town.
The fourth pair to enter are named Lettuce Patch and Turnip Field. Lettuce Patch states that both ponies come from Paradise, and Turnip Field denies this statement.
The fifth and final pair to enter are named Fianchetto and Knight Fork. Fianchetto states that she is not a pegasus from Utopia, while Knight Fork states that he is a pegasus from Paradise. Fianchetto then states that the two come from different towns.
After each of the first four pairs made their statements and left, Twilight scribbled her solutions and thought processes. Minutes after the final pair makes their statements, Twilight asks Fianchetto to bring Zodiac to her.
“It was nice of you showing me around Utopia, Spiral … if that is your real name,” Pinkie giggled. Her companion sighed.
“I’d say that we’ve been over this before, and that you know that’s my name.”
“Oh yeah, that whole ‘double-negative’ thingie; okie-dokey! Say, does that whole ‘I would say’ thing apply to everything you say?”
“I would say not; only statements that could be true or false, but not questions or commands. I would also say that one gets used to it after awhile. And, I would say, we’re back to the inn; your alicorn friend should be back before too long.”
“Well, thanks again. Your quirky town and its funny speech patterns will always have a special place in my head!”
Spiral shakes her head one last time, turns, and walks away. Pinkie is alone to ponder her thoughts:
I’d have Spike take a message for Princess Celestia, but he’s not here. I’d write it myself, but I don’t have digits on these hooves. Well, I’m sure I can retain all this information until Twilight returns, then she can help me write a letter. *hee-hee* … who would write ‘a’ letter, right? I mean, one has to write a whole lot of letters to convey any particular meaning, right? What would Princess Celestia say if I just sent her a piece of parchment with a big ‘Q’ on it? She’d probably wonder why I was so interested in ‘Q’.
Pinkie’s thoughts are interrupted by the clip-clopping of hooves just outside her room. She turns to see a familiar blue-maned yellow unicorn.
“Hey, I recognize you! You’re that unicorn we met last night. The one claiming to be from Paradise. So what’s up?”
“I don’t have any particular reason for coming here. That said, would you be willing to come with me?”
“Aww, I always look forward to making new friends … but I really should wait for my friend Twilight to return. She should be back any time now.”
A pegasus and second unicorn come up and stand beside the yellow unicorn, who then removes the prosthetic horn from his head. Pinkie gapes as he speaks: “I will not insist that you come with us … but you’re coming with us.”
“I am truly impressed, Princess Twilight Sparkle!” Zodiac could hardly hide his adoration for the alicorn’s intellect, upon reviewing Twilight’s solutions.
Twilight blushed as she responds. “It really was nothing special, at least not to me. But I certainly appreciate your enthusiasm for my work. So I take it I got every problem correct.”
“And so quickly. Pray, tell me how you solved these so effortlessly.”
Full of pride from a job well done, Twilight proceeds to explain her reasoning to Zodiac. “Well, if you insist …”
“One thing that really helped me solve these puzzles was the realization that any pony who claimed to be from Utopia must be a unicorn. In fact, anypony who was truthfully claiming to be from Utopia must be a unicorn, since pegasi from Utopia would lie; on the other hand, a pony who was lying about being from Utopia would be from Paradise, and only unicorns from Paradise lie. And by the same reasoning, any pony claiming to be from Paradise must be a pegasus. This really made the first puzzle trivial; I knew White Rose was a pegasus the instant she stated that she came from Paradise. Since you told me from the onset that each pair had one unicorn and one pegasus, this forced Blue Daffodil to be a unicorn. In this case, I couldn’t say which town either came from.”
“What I find really interesting is that the reverse is true: any pony claiming to be a unicorn must come from Utopia, since a truthful claim from a unicorn could only be made by one from Utopia, and a false claim from a pegasus could also only be made by one from Utopia. Also, any pony claiming to be a pegasus must come from Paradise. This helped me figure out the identities of the second and third pairs.”
“With the second pair, I knew that both Haystack and Corn Sheaf came from Utopia. Therefore, Haystack lied when stating that the two came from different towns, and only the pegasi from Utopia lie. Thus, Haystack was the pegasus and Corn Sheaf was the unicorn.”
“Similarly for the third pair: I knew that Topaz was from Paradise and Amethyst was from Utopia. That meant that Topaz lied when stating that the two came from the same town. That forced Topaz to be the unicorn and Amethyst to be the pegasus.”
Zodiac hangs on every word in awe as Twilight continues.
“Another important fact that helped me was that, if the two ponies disagreed with each other, they must come from the same town. Either both come from Utopia, in which case the unicorn would be truthful and the pegasus a liar, or both come from Paradise, in which case the pegasus would be truthful and the unicorn a liar. With the fourth pair, Turnip Field disagreed with Lettuce Patch; therefore, they had to come from the same town. If Paradise, then Lettuce Patch told the truth and must be a pegasus; if Utopia, then Lettuce Patch lied and must still be a pegasus. I cannot say which was truthful, but I knew that Lettuce Patch was a pegasus and Turnip Field a unicorn.”
“That fifth pair did take me longer than the others, since there was little to go on with their first comments. All I knew at first was that Fianchetto was not a unicorn from Paradise, as she would have lied and said she was a pegasus from Utopia … but if truthful, she could be either a unicorn from Utopia or a pegasus from Paradise. And further, she could be lying and be a pegasus from Utopia after all! As for Knight Fork, he could be telling the truth and be a pegasus from Paradise … or he could be lying, in which case he could be a unicorn from Paradise or a pegasus from Utopia. Anypony but a unicorn from Utopia. So to solve this, I had to ponder Fianchetto’s other comment.”
“Let’s assume for the moment that Fianchetto lied when she same that the two came from different towns. I already knew she wasn’t a unicorn from Paradise, so she would have to be a pegasus from Utopia. This would mean Knight Fork was a unicorn, but also from Utopia since they would then have to be from the same town. But I already knew that Knight Fork couldn’t be a unicorn from Utopia … so the assumption that Fianchetto lied leads to a contradiction. She must have been telling the truth, so the two did come from different towns.”
“Now, Fianchetto must be either a pegasus from Paradise or a unicorn from Utopia. If the former, that would force Knight Fork to be the unicorn, and again from Utopia … and once again, this is a contradiction to the fact that Knight Fork cannot be a unicorn from Utopia. The only possibility left is that Fianchetto is a uncorn from Utopia, and Knight Fork is a pegasus from Paradise.”
“BRAVO!!!”
The shout from outside the examination room causes both Twilight and Zodiac to turn to the doorway. A dark blue alicorn eyes Twilight’s figure carefully.
“Cloudstitch! I mean … Your Excellency, I did not expect you to …”
“That’s quite all right, Zodiac. And you need not worry about formalities around me; I would think that you knew this already, though.” Cloudstitch smiles as she speaks; her words are regal yet soothing; Twilight cannot help but make comparisons to Princess Celestia.
Cloudstitch then addresses Twilight directly. “When I heard reports among the Society members that a true alicorn princess had come to our fair forest towns, I had to see for myself.”
“So miss … I mean, princess? I must apologize; I don’t know how to address you.”
“I might say the same about you, Princess Twilight Sparkle … but from what I have heard, I suspect that I may simply call you Twilight, as you may call me Cloudstitch. I have never been one for formality.”
Twilight nods in acceptance, she herself still uncomfortable with the pedestal that so many have put her on. “So Cloudstitch, how long were you listening in?”
“Long enough to hear your explanation of those final puzzles … especially the one with Fianchetto and Knight Fork. You would fit right in the Alicorn Society, perhaps moreso than the others since you’re an actual alicorn.”
“It is good to see you, as always,” Zodiac starts, but Cloudstitch holds a forehoof up to stop him.
“I wish I were only here for adulations, but I have troubling news for Twilight.”
The smiles and pleasant feelings quickly drain from Twilight and Zodiac. “What news?”
“I’ve been informed by Spiral that your friend Pinkie Pie has been accosted. She’s been taken by a rogue pony faction.”
Twilight’s irises dilate at the information. “Rogue faction? Who took her? Where?”
“There’s only one group that could have done this,” Zodiac declares. Twilight turns to the unicorn.
“Pinkie’s been taken to Elysium … the town of the earth ponies.”