Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash felt a hard impact on their bodies, having landed on some sort of ground with their faces planted into the grass. The cyan Pegasus groaned in pain as she slowly arose to her hooves, enforcing even more pain to her body, the same happening to Pinkie once she came to.
"Ugh, My head's spinning!" Rainbow Dash complained, putting a hoof to her forehead. Pinkie Pie agreed, massaging her sore temples when the two looked around after recovering from the nasty fall. What they noticed at first glance was that they were certainly not in Ponyville, let alone Twilight's library any more but it was instead a large grass area bordered by a white fence that trailed to a house.
"Uhh... Did we drink too much Apple Cider again?" Pinkie Pie asked, Rainbow Dash shook her head in response, knowing full well that the current situation they were in was not caused by cider. Rainbow Dash looked around some more before beginning to break into panic.
"W-where are we? Where's the library? Where's Ponyville? WHERE THE HAY IS ANYTHING?!!" Rainbow Dash screamed while scrambling around the area until Pinkie grabbed her with both hooves in order to calm her down. When she did so, Dash found the device she and Pinkie had found back into Ponyville stuck in Pinkie's mane and glared at it.
"It's because of that stupid thing, we're now possibly a million miles away from home!" Rainbow Dash yelled. Pinkie was eager to not let this conundrum bring her down though.
"Don't worry, Dashie! Maybe we can find someone to help us, like whoever lives in there!" Pinkie chimed, pointing at the house in question before running up to the door.
"Pinkie, no!" Rainbow called out but it was too late, Pinkie was already wrestling with the door knob to no avail of getting the barrier open. After several more pulls, Pinkie Pie released her grip and looked back at the Pegasus with a disheartened look.
"How are we gonna get in now?" Rainbow Dash wasn't ready for that question, her eyes scanned the whole house to find no entry way possible, that is until she found a small rectangular window at the bottom of the wall. She walked over to examine it more and found it to possibly lead to the basement, Rainbow was hesitating on her next move when Pinkie started to push the window open for her. Rainbow Dash shrugged and helped Pinkie to get it open until the glass barrier gave way and swung open, causing them to stumble inside where they heard a voice that sounded masculine nearby that appeared to be complaining about something. The two mares stood back upright to the most unexpected sight of their lives, there was a couch with a two legged creature that looked like a hairless monkey with the exception of it's head. It was clad in a white shirt with the front pocket having two pens stuffed inside, grey pants and brown shoes covering it's feet. The most significant feature of it was it's glasses and it appeared to be holding some kind of small grey remote that was connected to whatever the thing was looking at, the two held their breath to avoid attracting any unwanted attention as they watched what the thing was doing while it started to talk again.
"Another basic problem is that to jump, you press 'Up'. In any typical 'Mortal Kombat' game or any tournament fighter, that's normal. But in a jumping, platforming game; Up is fucked up. Sometimes you intend to step back but your thumb slides across 'Up' and you jump by accident!" The creature explained while demonstrating on the TV opposite of him that showed a digitalised man in a blue suit jump backwards off a platform and down into the abyss. The creature continued to talk.
"The entire level too is all about hopping these platforms." Using whatever it was that was in it's hand, the creature made the blue thing in the screen jump at another person and punch it repeatedly, the creature was obviously struggling with doing such a thing however as when the blue character had punched the opponent off screen, the platform collapsed, making the blue guy fall again.
"Augh, fuck!" The creature complained in a annoyed tone when Pinkie Pie mustered up the courage to talk to the being with a smile plastered on her face.
"Hi mister! Are you having a rough day?" Pinkie asked, the creature turned it's head to the two and hung his mouth agape when his brain instantly registered what he was looking at.
"What- What the hell are you doing in my house?!" The being asked in shock as it jumped from the couch and took a few steps back. The pink pony giggled.
"Hee hee, You're funny for a bald monkey!" Pinkie Pie laughed.
"Oh great, the fucking game is now apparently making me hallucinate about talking pastel horses!" The thing exclaimed with a mortified expression.
"We're not horses, we're ponies, silly!" Pinkie said through giggles before she introduced herself and her friend.
"Anyways, hi! My name is Pinkie Pie and this is my friend, Rainbow Dash! Who are you, talking monkey?" Pinkie said in her trademark fast pace. The being scowled before giving it's answer.
"I'm not a talking monkey, I'm a human!" The being said, getting annoyed by this 'Pinkie's Pie' eagerness. The two ponies looked at each other before looking back at the 'Human'.
"Okay, so what's your name Mister Human?" Pinkie asked, the human readjusted it's glasses and answered.
"I'm the Nerd." 'The Nerd' said, Rainbow Dash stifled her laughs in response.
"The Nerd?! Hahaha, I used to call Twilight an egghead, but Nerd works too!" Rainbow Dash laughed, the Nerd scowled at the Pegasus who noticed and ended her giggle fit with a nervous chuckle.
"So uhh... Nerd, Pinkie said you were having a hard day." Rainbow Dash said.
"You bet I am, this game reeks of ASS!" The Nerd responded pointing at the TV screen.
"Then why are you playing it?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Because I'm the Nerd! It's my job to warn people about shitty games!" The Nerd retorted.
"Ooh, sounds like a fun job!" Pinkie exclaimed obliviously.
"Trust me, it's not." The Nerd said, deadpan.
"So how do you play this 'game', anyway?" Rainbow Dash inquired.
"With this." The Nerd simply said, picking up the device he was holding earlier and handed it to Rainbow Dash who held it with her front hooves and cocked an eyebrow.
"What kind of calculator is this?" The Pegasus asked, The Nerd face palmed and glanced at Dash.
"It's a Nintendo 64 Controller."
Pinkie Pie tilted her head in curiosity.
"Nin-Ten-Dough Sixty-Fore?" Pinkie attempted to rephrase. "What's that?"
The Nerd sighed and signalled the two to sit beside him on the couch where he explained to them about Video Games and their purpose in this world, to his relief, they got the idea when he finished the talk.
"I always wondered what that colt, Button Mash plays with at home." Rainbow Dash said as she beamed at the controller and took control of the video game which The Nerd told them was Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero.
Rainbow Dash struggled at first due to the controller's complex design and her lack of fingers, but was getting better at controlling the character on the screen. Dashie approached an opponent and used the punch button making the enemy fall off the platform.
"Haha, I just punched somepony into the abyss! How can you not like this game?" Rainbow asked in disbelief of The Nerd's opinion.
"You'll soon find out." The Nerd answered, Pinkie Pie was watching intently as Rainbow Dash proceeded with the video game. Several minutes passed when the game's environment was now a dark cave. Rainbow made the character jump over a crevice only for it to slip and fall in and get impaled on a spike, making Pinkie flinch on the sight of blood.
"What the hay?!" Dashie said with a bit of a frustrated tone.
It only got worse from there, Sub-Zero was being mangled to death countless times, no matter how hard Dashie tried. With every fall, crush and unfair 'Jump-Kick', Dash's frustration was getting the better of her until she began to spurt out curse words from left to right, leaving Pinkie Pie astonished and the Nerd shaking his head.
"Shit!"
"Damn it!"
"Come on you-- Crud!"
"Grr, you stupid-- AARGGH!!"
"Piece of crap!"
"BUCK-- I mean FUCK!!"
After dropping the F bomb, Dashie screamed in rage and threw the controller down.
"No wonder you said this game was bad! This game can suck my Rainbow Balls! That god damn piece of shit! That fucking god damn... God damn..." Rainbow stuttered, trying to find a good word to use when the Nerd stepped in.
"THAT GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING BULLSHIT!!" Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie went wide eyed at the outburst as they watched the Nerd pull the game's cartridge out of the system.
"No wonder I haven't played this one before! This is ANAL SAUCE!!" The Nerd finished before tossing the cartridge and erupting an ice flame from his hands, freezing the cartridge in place. The Nerd approached the frozen cartridge, grabbed the top half and pulled it off, revealing a skeletal spine hanging from the inside as if it were a living being. The Nerd threw the now dead cartridge away and slumped back down to the couch to comfort a rather angry Rainbow Dash with a green bottle with a label that said 'Rolling Rock' in his hand.
"Don't worry Rainbow Dash, It's only a game. Here, have a beer." The Nerd reassured, handing the bottle to the Pegasus who looked at it in confusion.
"Ooh, what is that?" Pinkie asked, tapping at the bottle for emphasis.
"It's Rolling Rock." The Nerd answered as he got his own bottle and proceeded to chug it down, Rainbow Dash shrugged and had a snip, sputtering a little from the taste. She gave it to Pinkie, insisting that she should drink it instead as of which the pink pony did so, gulping it down in one go.
"So what are you two even doing here?" The Nerd asked.
"Oh yeah! Me and Dashie were cleaning up Twilight's library back in Ponyville when I found this thing in a book pile. We pressed some of the buttons and the next thing we know, we end up here in your home!" Pinkie said in a few heartbeats while pulling out the device that had still been tangled in her mane since their arrival. The Nerd looked at the device with confusion.
"So you're saying that this thing took you here from somewhere else?" The Nerd asked.
"Yeppers! And we came to see you, if you could help us get back!" Pinkie added, The Nerd shrugged.
"Well I don't know, I'm for one certain that there isn't a 'Ponyville' around here or in any other state. And since talking ponies don't exist here either, I can only assume that this device is a universe transporter." The Nerd theorised.
"Ooooh!" Pinkie gleamed, looking at the device in her hoof.
"So can you help us or not?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"How can I help?! I'm a fuckin' Nerd! Not a dimensional traveller!" The Nerd protested, Rainbow Dash couldn't argue with that. Her and Pinkie's faces both deflated in sadness when The Nerd piped up.
"Though, you could press any of those buttons and go to a different universe which may even be yours!" The Nerd said, the two mares looked at each other with both excitement and hope gleaming in their eyes.
"Ready for a crazy adventure, Dashie?" Pinkie asked.
"You bet I am!" The Pegasus said in pride, the two waved at The Nerd before using the device.
"Bye Nerd! Keep playing those shitty games!" Pinkie said, making Rainbow Dash giggle at the scene of Pinkie using cuss words as the object engulfed them with the light and they both disappeared.
The Nerd stared at where his two visitors were just standing with a bewildered expression before leaning back, using his hand as a pillow.
"...I need a beer." The Nerd said, grabbing the bottle of Rolling Rock.