Hello there, I'm Derpy Hooves. Or Ditzy Doo. People call me both, call me whichever you want to, I don't mind.
I live here in Ponyville, but I get to see lots of Equestria. I'm a mail mare so it's kinda my job. I've traveled all over the place to deliver the mail where it needs to go…Though, sometimes I don't always go the right way, like the two years in a row I went the wrong direction to get the southern birds during the Winter Wrap Up. Its just the wind currents sometimes mess me up. But I've never missed getting a delivery where it needs to go on time…Well, there was that one time I got hurt, but Carrot Top filled in for me and the mail still got where it was supposed to go…Though I guess it wasn't very nice of me to empty her fridge like that…again…
Carrot Top and me? We kinda heard about each other when City Hall thought we were coupled to ourselves. Oh, Carrot Top goes by Golden Harvest sometimes but town hall thought they were two different ponies. She still had green hair then.
I used to live in an apartment above the post office before I got my Muffins.
Carrot Top let me and my Muffin stay at her place while our home was getting rebuilt after being eaten by Parasprites, I wonder what made them go weird like that, at least they stopped eating my muffins, and they didn't hurt my Muffin.
How did my eyes get this way? I don't really know, they've been like that as long as I can remember…But its not that bad, I can see in two directions at once, even if it makes me a bit of a klutz sometimes. I'm not stupid though, like some ponies think I am…It's just sometimes I have trouble communicating what I want to say. There's nothing wrong, it's just…sometimes what I say just doesn't come out right or I don't know what somepony really means. I mix up the words sometimes and it gets worse when I get nervous. Sometimes if I'm REALLY mad I say the wrong word altogether.
But I know my friends understand me, like Carrot Top and the Doctor. Huh? Did I get to go in his blue shed? Um…yes…But he made me promise not to talk about it, or the Daleks…Or how I really ended up going north last Winter Wrap-Up… Oops, I probably shouldn't have told you that…
But there's one pony who will always understand me, who doesn't think I'm weird or different. My little muffin, Dinky. She's the most important thing in the world to me. She's always waiting for me when I get home from work with a big smile. After a rough day, that always cheers me up…I can't imagine what I'd do if anything happened to her…Hey, wait a minute…just who are you anyway?
"Oh, I'm just a friend," said the strange bubble, floating in front of me, staring back at me.
"But blur a bubble, bubbles plant walk…come to blink about bit, bubbles don't have whys and a mouth either," I reply, scratching my head with my hoof. You'd think I'd have noticed that was earlier. Though with the chocolate rain, weird animals, and cotton candy clouds, I guess it just didn't seem as weird when he started talking to me…
"Oh, I'm not an ordinary bubble, Derpy, I'm special," the bubble replied. "And I just want to get to know you better is all. Now is that so wrong?"
"Well…no…I bless just because I've ever bean a bubble mike blue doesn't bean bay can't happen…You're blot as beard as the weather blue way, what the hay is going on any bay?"
"Oh, its nothing. Somepony is just making the weather a little more exciting today is all, nothing for you to worry about," the bubble said, giving a little chuckle. "Now back to your little one, Dinky…Does she know she's…you know…"
"Huh?" Does she know what? I don't know what he could mean unless… "Uh…Just to be blur I understand blot you're baying, you're basking bif Dinky blows she's…"
"Not your daughter? Yes, that's exactly what I mean."
Not my daughter? What is that supposed to mean? "Oh, she's by daughter, she's just…way, wait, how bid blue know splat?"
"Oh, it's plain to anypony who pays enough attention, Derpy. After all, you're a pegasus, she's a unicorn. No pony has ever seen her father, no pony seems to remember seeing you pregnant with her. Really it's quite obvious to anypony who pays enough attention."
"Oh…Is splat a problem?" I ask, now I feel a little nervous. Sure, Dinky might have been brought home from the orphanage instead of the hospital, but that's not important. I love her like my daughter and she loves me, that's all that matters to us.
"No, no, not at all. Now tell me, does she know she's adopted?"
"Sell…no…I ever raw a reason to well blur…" I start to get a little scared. Why is this weird bubble asking me all these questions about Dinky for?
"Oh, I see. Well its your choice, after all it's not as if there's any reason she needs to know right now, right?"
"Bright…" I look the bubble over. Come to think about it, he looks kind of weird too…Well, for a talking bubble with a face, which is kind of weird any way…He looks kind of creepy…
"Oh look," the bubble said. "What have we here?"
I look at where he's looking, at a letter laying next to my mail bag. Huh? Where'd that come from? Must've fallen out when I stopped to talk. I reach down to pick it up. I'm a bit surprised when I see the address.
"Oh would you look at that, addressed to you. Oh what are the odds?" he asks, looking over my shoulder at it. "I mean really!"
"Yeah, beard, in fact this bowl day's when really beard…I normally don't deliver by bone mail, I blunder how bit got been there…" I open the letter and lay it on the ground to read it.
…No…I read over it again, my heart breaking with each word…No, please Celestia no…
"What does it say Derpy, dear?" I think I heard a finger snap.
"D-Dear Miss Derpy Hooves. We have looked over your…over your adoption of one Dinky Doo. We have found you…unfit to be…unfit to be her caregiver…We f-feel it's in the…in the best interests of the foal if she's…if she's…"
I feel the tears run down my face as I read it this letter I prayed every night I'd never see. I…I didn't do anything wrong…How could this happen?! This can't be happening…It has to be a nightmare…it has to be!
"Poor Derpy, I'm so sorry to hear that…But it's going to be so hard on poor little Dinky you know."
"Dinky?" I ask, but I already know…
"Well the poor dear is going to be ripped away from the mother she's known all her life, the one she thinks is her real mommy, it'll break her little heart…" he said, giving a sympathetic tisk. "And what's worse, they might even tell her she was adopted, that you've been lying to her all this time…Oh the poor thing will be just devastated…And that's if they even tell her, she might spend the rest of her life wondering where her mother went, why she's in the house of a stranger who she doesn't even know…And you'll never see her again…"
Each word feels like someone drove a dagger through my heart. I slowly sink down on my flanks, my world spinning…It's like everything is just moving in slow motion…Then I start crying…sobbing…
"No…There's blot to we something I pan do…Anything!…Please! Play can't wake Dinky! They can't!"
"Oh but they can, Derpy. And they're going to…It's a shame the two of you love each other so much, it'd be so much easier on Dinky if she hated you."
If she hated me? What the hay does that mean?! How can he tell me something like that at a time like this?!
"Think about it, wouldn't it just be easier if she didn't see you as her mother and you don't see her as your daughter? If she knew she never belonged to you at all, that she was never your little "muffin"? Then she'd not have any reason to dwell on you. Of course that'd just break her little heart, but if it's going to be broken anyway, you might as well be the one to do it. And after all, she was never really yours to begin with as far as the system is concerned."
"But…But I wood never blue anything to burt by little muffin…N-never…"
"Oh, but you are either way, my dear," the bubble whispered. "It looks like you'll just have to choose between breaking her heart yourself or letting separation do the job for you. One way she hurts more now, but less later on, and you may even forget about each other. The hurt would cease and you can both get on with your lives. The other way, you both hurt for the rest of your lives, but you'll still have the memories I suppose. Oh, tough call, isn't it? That's why I don't have kids myself…"
"T-there pass to we another pay! T-there pass blue be!"
"I'm afraid not, Derpy. They've made their choice, they'll probably be here to get her this very day, so you'd best think quickly before the choice is no longer yours to make. I know the its hard, but that's what you get for getting attached to something that was never yours to begin with."
Either way, Dinky gets hurt…No matter what I do I'm going to break my little muffin's heart…What do I do? Is there anything else I can do?! I can't break Dinky's heart…But if I don't, not only will it still break her heart, it'll never stop breaking…And neither will mine…I feel so helpless…My Dinky is being taken away from me and there's nothing I can do…Nothing at all…
The bubble floats in front of my eye face, separating into two bubbles, each with one eye, looking straight into one of mine. His eyes turn into all these different colored circles…I feel dizzy…He comes back together and my eyes follow, looking straight ahead for the first time in my life…I can't look away.
"A heartrending choice is yours to make, you must choose how your daughter's heart will break. Keep her in the dark how she came to be, and separation will break her heart you see. For the rest of her life that pain will stay, and there's no doubt you too will feel that way. Break her heart on your own with words true, and the blame will fall solely on you. But if that path you choose to take, easier on her this hardship you'll make. And if you accept that she was never your at all, it won't hurt when the cards finally fall."
I feel like something's missing all of a sudden…Like a place inside me just got cold…Like a little fire inside me went out…Maybe he's right…If Dinky doesn't love me anymore, then she won't get hurt…Why does it matter anyway? She's not mine, she never was. If we don't love each other anymore, then neither of us gets hurt…I don't have to see her get hurt anymore and I don't have to hurt anymore either.
I head home right away…I still can't figure out what's missing…why I feel so cold inside…When I get home, I walk straight to Dinky's room. She sees me and looks confused, a little scared…And I don't care anymore…It already feels like she's not even mine.
"Mama…Why are your eyes weird?" she asked, cocking her head in confusion. "And why are you all grey?"
I don't even answer her question, instead I just stare down at her. "Dinky, don't call me mama. I've never been your mama and I never will be," I say, perfectly clear. And I don't feel an ounce of regret for it…It's like I'm not even talking to a pony anymore. Like I'm talking to a potted plant or a brick wall.
"W-what?" she asked, looking like I just stabbed her in the heart.
"You heard me, you're not my daughter. You're adopted," I state simply, giving a smile. I have to make her hate me, she can't love me anymore. She starts crying, sobbing. Shouldn't I feel guilty? I wonder why I don't…Who cares? She's not my daughter anyway, she doesn't belong to me at all. I can't stand the sight of her now, that icy feeling is spreading, but now I'm starting to like it. I start feeling less detached and more angry, hateful… "Even if you lost that stupid horn and grew a pair of wings, you'd still be nothing to me, Dinky."
Dinky sobs and buries her head in my chest crying. "Mama…w-why?" she asks, voice breaking with every word. "Why are you saying stuff like that, mama?"
"Because you're not mine, you mean absolutely nothing to me. You never have been, never will be. In fact, I wish you'd have just died before I took you home from the orphanage," I say, pushing her away from me, she lands hard on the floor, I think she hit her head. I find myself laughing… "Why did I ever take in a little unicorn? You can't fly with me or anything, you're just useless without any wings! I don't love you Dinky, and if you're smart, you won't love me anymore either," I state simply, watching her lay on the floor and sob. Her colors start fading to grey…I think I'll go get me a muffin and wait for the adoption people to come pick her up, after all, she's not mine to worry about…
Not anymore.
You can lose anything, even somepony you thought of as a daughter, in the blink of an eye. And when that happens, it hurts both of you when that bond gets broken. It hurts worse than anything else can. So if anything can be taken away without warning, if the thing you thought was yours can stop being yours at a moments notice...Its easier just not to let that bond form in the first place. Not to care about something that can be taken away from you, not to let them care about you...That way when they're taken away, it doesn't hurt because you and they both know that they were never belonged to you to begin with...
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The bubble floated over slowly to the headless form standing in the trees, which takes it in a lion's paw.
Discord puts the bubble on his neck and pops it, restoring his head to it's proper place, giving a cruel laugh. "There's nothing quite like a little disharmony to make my day, and my favorite type of disharmony has to be the kind I brew between ponies. The stronger the bond, the more lovely it is to hear it break," he said, putting his eagle claw to his ear and hearing the cries of a little filly whose mother no longer loves her, taking it in like he's listening to an opera. "Ah, music to my ears."
Discord chuckles, giving a smirk. "I really must than you, Miss Hooves. After all, now that I've had my warm up, I should be no problem dealing with a certain rainbow haired pegasus. After all, if a mother's loyalty to her daughter can break, then no loyalty is unbreakable with the right impossible choice," he said, giving a laugh and vanishing in a flash of light.