Years before Littlepip stepped from Stable 2, the Wasteland greeted all ponies with it's usual contempt. Tome Tale and his silent partner, Stranger, live day to day on their next bag of caps, until they stumble into something bigger than themselves.
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Whelp, time to put this off no farther! The description gained my attention, and the cover art sold it. I'm gonna buckle down for the next... few hours and see if this story lives up to my expectations!
You have been warned!
~ Neon Lights
I'm liking this story enough to keep reading. But the main character makes me want to throw my tablet at the wall in hopes it will somehow hurt him. Is this guy going to be an hypocrite asshole too full of himself until the end or is he going to change along the way? Because I can live with hypocritical, but not the rest.
6722782 oh yeah, he'll change, I promise. Well..mostly. he'll keep a lot of who he is, a bit of an asshole, but you'll start seeing a lot more of how he is underneath...well...you'll see. but yes, there IS major character development that will eventually happen. I promise. ^^ Otherwise, I'm overjoyed you like the story. :D
Well after rereading through chapter 3, I can do a small review of this chapter... But I am not doing this alone, reviewing with me is Seria!
i.imgur.com/PHSUw78.png
Seria: Do I really have to do this?
Aw come on Seria! It's all for a bit of fun right? Don't be like that now!
Seria: Ugh fine, but I'm not going easy on this you know?
Why would you anyway? Unless this was Rage Reviews of course that is... Grammar is very much in the standard category, no spell mishaps, the sentences are flowed easily and all in all. This is okay.
Seria: Psssh, that's nothing comparing to Looks at Tome Tale this guy, like seriously? This pony here is being a stereotypical hypocritical asshole here, it makes me want to ignite him with my flames right now... but for the sake of seeing this as possible character development, I'll let it pass...but that doesn't mean I get to set him aflame yet...
Okay that was a bit much there... Now on to the mysterious stallion (Not so mysterious because I know who this is already just from the dog and color of coat ) Hmm... I'm a bit iffy on how the character is portrayed right now... to new readers, this may not be much but for those who read the original, this might seem a bit odd of him to behave this way... but I can't say much about this otherwise. I'll just leave it that the characters are amazing as far as this story goes
6723220 bare in mind, this story is set an average of around 20-30 years (somewhere around there, no direct date given) before the original. said character you are talking about, is currently in his youth and VERY new to the wasteland. in fact, this is only his third outing into the wasteland. I'm not about to throw it such classic characters and have them be exactly what they are shown as, no, I'm going to show HOW THEY BECAME the characters we know and love (or love to hate). Otherwise it'd be boring.
Now as for tome tale? yes, character development will happen, and yes, you can hate him and consider him an asshole, I am 100% fine with that. he IS an asshole. My aim is to make you utterly hate him...but still root for him, and understand him, and even pity him. For you to be compassionate, understand his goals, even believe he may be in the right...but that doesn't make him a good pony. In this fic...don't expect him to ever be able to wear the title of 'a good pony'. He is not a hero.
6723351 Huh, so he's within his youth? That makes sense in theory... I won't object to it then!
As for Tome Tale, it's Seria who hates him not me! I pity the stallion, she outright hates him!
Seria: Hey!
What? You said so yourself! Don't deny it friendo...
6723402 hehehe. hate all you want. so long as you hate him for the person he is (which would make him a well written character) and not because he's a badly written character. XD (If its the latter....eek?)
6723437 Seria: You're joking right? That's... ugh i'm leaving but not before I punch you in the face!
Seria, calm down before things get worse. I do not want another fight caused by you again... oh dear she's going for it...Seria don't...! Gets punched in the face Ouch...
6723491 thats not an answer as to if he's a well written character or not... ^-^;
6800453 thank you for the kind review. ^^ The next chapter should actually be out soon! It's fully written and currently with my editor, he'll have that finished in the next week and a half. And I'm writing chapter 5 as we speak. :) Do you have a favourite character yet?
6819181 Thank you so much. ^^ I'm glad you enjoy it. :) Though, like most people, you may grow to hate tome...he's not a badly written character, many have said he's very well written. But the problem is...erm...he's an asshole. XD
6819304 Ahh, no, the spoilers! But a jerk protagonist is not always a bad thing. I think I can tolerate most despicable characters... unless your protagonist becomes a slaver king or something. Hehe.
6820162 lol...no no no...not a slaver king... erm... well... lets just say I plan to make my audience support and root for Tome...but I don't actually want them to like him. XD He's a fucking prick.
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Yeah... right... sure.
That was good. More!
6836085 there may be more today. ^^ if we're lucky.
Interesting that Tome should claim right away parenting wasn't for him, yet he immediately afterwards starts trying to emulate a parent (as he imagines one would be in his mind). It could have just been a slave-to-master relationship, in which Tome forces Sonnet to accept what food is coming her way; he instead treats it as 'parenting 101.'
Some visual details to this observation might come in handy. Even if Tome cannot read into his posture, it does not hurt to let the reader speculate.
I sense there might be a running gag in here. I mean, Tome Tale finds himself pinned by a pissed assailant at least once a chapter, anyway.
Yet these hostile reactions were great to implement. It shows that our protagonist cannot always get away with his habit of exploiting others' insecurities and pasts. Adds realism to the interactions.
Excellent transition there. Change the status quo, add in a new character, a new risk, barely a break in the action!
You mean you started this interrogation without removing his helmet? Well, of course, now you are going to have difficulty trying to tell if he is lying or not. Oversight on your part, Tome.
Tome can feel comfortable reading into others, but when the same is done to him. Nope, he quits. Says a lot about the guy, does it not? Either that or we the readers are not ready for the backstory yet.
But Tome knows exactly the reason why. He would know, given the way he introduces himself in the prologue.
Examining how Tome interacts with Aero, it struck me: Tome does not care so much that Aero is a pegasus than that he is inexperienced and young. It seems odd, given how Tome tenses up and grows hostile at the mere sight of a pegasus in the previous chapter. I wonder where that fantastic racism went. Perhaps Tome just worried more about Aero's inexperience, yet I have not noticed any hint of annoyance or hatred at his status as a pegasus.
Absolutely lovely introduction to our continuity character! And that dog has a very strange lack of discipline. Attacking ponies without a command from his master? That dog had been content to sit as Tome said "hello."
For goodness sake, Tome is going up against an equal, and all they can do is smirk! Please, you two, move your legs! Change stance! Do something besides smirking and raising eyebrows! Perfect portrayal of Tome's equal, however.
This chapter had me enthralled for most of its length; the character relationships probably had me interested most of all. The group that Tome leads is so full of spite and unspoken backstories and awkward cooperation that it boggles me how they manage to stay together! Perhaps that seemingly impossible task of keeping these characters in the same group is exactly what interests me so much. But that would be an injustice, since these characters were so well written to be entertaining (I may be a little tired, so eloquence is optional).
The problems I have found were often nitpicks or inconsistencies I perceived regarding Tome Tale. Those can be easily forgiven by readers, though. There is just so much packed into these lines with character relationships, repressed memories, the 'anchor' dynamic, and implications in the unsaid that one or two inconsistencies do not harm the story too significantly. However, the dynamic between Aero and Tome could use a little tweaking.
Outstanding work on this chapter.
"Slut is my new favorite word!"
Who is this... hacking into the author's notes?
Hah. This is probably one of the more accurate portrayals of a wastelander mindset I've seen. He is better than others, which makes him a step up from your average wastelander, but still has that certain mentality. It will be interesting to see how this smart pain in da butt handles things as time goes on. Still an interesting read thus far.
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Thanks, I hope you continue reading and enjoy it. Comments like these are always welcome, even if you find chapters you arent happy about. by all means, go ahead and let me know. I love feedback. :)
Is that Homage when she was a filly.
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I REVEAL NOTHING!!!!! -locks mouth shut and throws away the key-