For real, though. If I can help it, the stretch between 3 and 4 will be the absolute longest drought the story'll ever have. I'm going to push myself for a two month or less publishing schedule from now on.
Must admit that I ain't really a fan of the copy paste Institute that we are encountering here, synths and high tech are for Fo, give us some magic instead. Seeing a group of ponies that make mindless slaves out of a radiated mirror pool, the ponies that come out being literary hollow, would bring some magical horror to the swamp instead of "Zombie robots". One of Kkats biggest mistakes in my opinion was to make the world so mechanic focused instead of putting some more magic in there, its arcane science after all, not just science. Maybe food for thought if you want to go back and do something original instead of being in the shadow of FO4
I think that the only other "Animal friend" char that I have seen were a side char in PH who walked around with a bear, so nice seeing that this story have a moth stallion in their midst, that will properly lead to a lot of interesting stuff to come!
I just love the idea of Tough Sell enjoying the entertainment from the local mares of the night fighting over the pretty dress Quill pawned off to him almost as much as the money it'll get him.
Nice transition from him badmouthing talking about the town's missing doctor to mentioning the Institute for the first time too. Really curious how they'll be different from the Fallout 4 version; hopefully they'll also be less Stupid Evil than in the game.
Considering how gratuitous it feels to mutilate a pegasus protagonist out of her wing as soon as the story starts, I'm also wondering if there'll be a deal with that devil to restore Quill's wing if she helps them.
Loved seeing Quill seep even more into the scavenger mindset. It'd be kinda sad if she'd been a Stable dweller or an Enclave civilian, but as a proud Steel Ranger scribe, the irony and lack of self-awareness from "Preserve, don’t pillage" is hilarious instead.
It's nice to see some more of her voice in this chapter too. Like I said, she's kinda Danse-level of needlessly verbose in her thoughts, so seeing that go away when she speaks instead is great. Maybe there's too much contrast between her thoughts and the casual way she speaks and directly-thinks actually, now that I think about it.
So yeah, lines like "Just wait ‘til you see me tomorrow," "Marauding and murderous rapists who lack any and all morals?" and "Nice job aiming for the legs, Willow" were fun. Same for her motive rant about Steel Rangers.
Hopefully, being "a wastelander first and Steel Ranger second" won't give her even more problems down the line. Apparently, conflicting loyalties are less a Rainbow Dash thing and more a pegasi-as-a-whole thing... At least in Fallout Equestria.
I admit I don't speak much of Willow Wisp. She's got a lovely name, and her dog's nice too, but even after reading the whole fic so far, she's just there to me. Necessary for Quill to keep following her adventure, plus some exposition into the world of Mulisiana (like the voodoo that's teased throughout the fic).
I mean, I still like her, but she doesn't inspire me much to talk about. In this chapter, it'd be that I loved her "Dey ain’t dat bad…" quip but that's it.
But I did love how utterly ruthless she proved to be in the next chapter. Probably won't comment on Excision though and skip straight to the Proxies whenever I post again, that 'dungeon run' was just too long and not-my-cup-of-tea for me.
But despite that, I love the story and Quill. I'm just... not really good at focusing on the positives when talking about stuff.
So to finish, I'd just say that I'm curious if/when Quill will return to that starter Stable, with its mysterious bottom floor and probably-Institute-agent unicorn...
11405235 Thank you. I'm never sure whether my comments will make the author happy or unhappy, I always fear all my criticism may torpedo their mood to write even with praise to go with it.
Oh! OOH! NEW CHAPTER!!!
Well things are looking pretty grim for poor Quill.... infection, bullet wounds. and the worst, possible, thing! Her favourite robe destroyed!!
Oh I mean she could by dying of an infection and has a missing wing but like, dat robe tho.
I can't wait to see how they're planning to take out an entire tribe of crackpot idiots with just the four of them, a Goremoth and an old dog.
8132266
I bawled my eyes out while writing the robe's death scene, it was truly crushing...!
8133182
Thank you!!
For real, though. If I can help it, the stretch between 3 and 4 will be the absolute longest drought the story'll ever have. I'm going to push myself for a two month or less publishing schedule from now on.
8132697 Those poor defenceless robes! Died in the prime of their life! Truly sad!
Also it's kinda sad how that pony settlement was brutally murdered but like... yeah those poor robes!!
Alright well Camphor is officially my favorite. Unique pet with unique personality makes for some unique situations I am sure
Must admit that I ain't really a fan of the copy paste Institute that we are encountering here, synths and high tech are for Fo, give us some magic instead. Seeing a group of ponies that make mindless slaves out of a radiated mirror pool, the ponies that come out being literary hollow, would bring some magical horror to the swamp instead of "Zombie robots". One of Kkats biggest mistakes in my opinion was to make the world so mechanic focused instead of putting some more magic in there, its arcane science after all, not just science. Maybe food for thought if you want to go back and do something original instead of being in the shadow of FO4
I think that the only other "Animal friend" char that I have seen were a side char in PH who walked around with a bear, so nice seeing that this story have a moth stallion in their midst, that will properly lead to a lot of interesting stuff to come!
Nitpick
"and...." Delete a period
9025628
All I'll say is that there's more magic involved than you might currently think, and more than one variety of synth.
"These things murder us in packs. I bet they'd make great pets!"
- Dr. Camphor
- whatever human that first tamed a dog
I just love the idea of Tough Sell enjoying the entertainment from the local mares of the night fighting over the pretty dress Quill pawned off to him almost as much as the money it'll get him.
Nice transition from him
badmouthingtalking about the town's missing doctor to mentioning the Institute for the first time too. Really curious how they'll be different from the Fallout 4 version; hopefully they'll also be less Stupid Evil than in the game.Considering how gratuitous it feels to mutilate a pegasus protagonist out of her wing as soon as the story starts, I'm also wondering if there'll be a deal with that devil to restore Quill's wing if she helps them.
Loved seeing Quill seep even more into the scavenger mindset. It'd be kinda sad if she'd been a Stable dweller or an Enclave civilian, but as a proud Steel Ranger scribe, the irony and lack of self-awareness from "Preserve, don’t pillage" is hilarious instead.
It's nice to see some more of her voice in this chapter too. Like I said, she's kinda Danse-level of needlessly verbose in her thoughts, so seeing that go away when she speaks instead is great. Maybe there's too much contrast between her thoughts and the casual way she speaks and directly-thinks actually, now that I think about it.
So yeah, lines like "Just wait ‘til you see me tomorrow," "Marauding and murderous rapists who lack any and all morals?" and "Nice job aiming for the legs, Willow" were fun. Same for her motive rant about Steel Rangers.
Hopefully, being "a wastelander first and Steel Ranger second" won't give her even more problems down the line. Apparently, conflicting loyalties are less a Rainbow Dash thing and more a pegasi-as-a-whole thing... At least in Fallout Equestria.
I admit I don't speak much of Willow Wisp. She's got a lovely name, and her dog's nice too, but even after reading the whole fic so far, she's just there to me. Necessary for Quill to keep following her adventure, plus some exposition into the world of Mulisiana (like the voodoo that's teased throughout the fic).
I mean, I still like her, but she doesn't inspire me much to talk about. In this chapter, it'd be that I loved her "Dey ain’t dat bad…" quip but that's it.
But I did love how utterly ruthless she proved to be in the next chapter. Probably won't comment on Excision though and skip straight to the Proxies whenever I post again, that 'dungeon run' was just too long and not-my-cup-of-tea for me.
But despite that, I love the story and Quill. I'm just... not really good at focusing on the positives when talking about stuff.
So to finish, I'd just say that I'm curious if/when Quill will return to that starter Stable, with its mysterious bottom floor and probably-Institute-agent unicorn...
11403968
Thank you again for the lovely and detailed feedback, it means the world to me c:
11405235
Thank you. I'm never sure whether my comments will make the author happy or unhappy, I always fear all my criticism may torpedo their mood to write even with praise to go with it.
11405321
Criticism is key to improvement, so I welcome it!