A terrible affliction has befallen the peaceful town of Ponyville, and the lavender unicorn and her friends are right in the middle of it! And the edges of it. Heck, it's pretty much lavender unicorns all over.

A story unrelated to anything.

OK, I'll start from the top.

Discord found a loophole on his stone prison... several, in fact.

Now I'm in the colorful world of ponies, have the power to make Physics go to a corner to cry, sweet toys, I have new friends, the responsibility of managing and studying chaos, my own maids, a personal assistant, the possibility of a herd... oh, and some stupid cult wants me dead and has the stuff required to make a very good attempt, another stupid cult wants me to take over the world and can't take 'no' for an answer, my subconscious plays merry hell with my powers when I'm upset, a few nobles despise me, my emotions can break the brain-shaped cork holding back power enough to fold reality in half, Celestia is either trying to manipulate me or get me to control myself, and I'm tasked with preventing the unraveling of the fabric of reality due to the lack of sufficient chaos magic use through the ages making the world start to rot at the seams.

Oh, and since this is sorta following events on episodes I already saw but 'haven't happened yet', I have to avoid mucking with them or I risk causing a paradox that might or might not erase me from existence, outright kill me, cause my powers to find a new host, cause my power to find several hosts, or just provoke the destruction of the entire universe.

(Though that last one is the worst-case scenario; the destruction might be contained just to this galaxy.)

No pressure.

Oh, I have to go, Dash and Scootaloo found me. In case you're wondering, they want to see if beating me up will cause them to earn enough EXP to go up a few thousand levels and grant them the ability to will galaxy-sized mechas into existence through sheer hot-blooded-ness.

No, I'm not ashamed of having introduced them to- oh $#!&! They have Twilight on their side! Bye!

Jerry was a broken man, working at an unrewarding job, slowly losing the fight against a depression born from paternal abuse and resentment. With no surviving family or friends beyond hollow acquaintances, he turned to drink in order to dull the pain of the same routine and all its awful reminders.

In one night, lost amidst the haze of inebriation and regret, his old life was reduced to nothing more than the ashes of a bad memory. Reborn into an unfamiliar world, and with a body just as alien, how will he adapt with nowhere to call home?

Special Thanks to:
Flaming Reign (Proofreading/editing)
Hyper Atomic (For the awesome description update as well as notes and proofreading!)
Cloudy Serrano (For going back over my original chapters and doing some MUCH NEEDED editing!)
jjamess10 (For EPIC Cover Art)

Now Featured on Equestria Daily!
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Three Nights in Manehattan, a sequel
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As a child, Daphne knew of a world where magic lived, where an immortal princess reigned over a beautiful kingdom, and longed to journey there beside Leit Motif, the filly she'd grown to love in the woods behind her home. But one day, when she needed her most, Leit Motif was gone, and she never came back to show her the way. As she grew, she put aside her childish dreams, and taught herself to believe the lie.
When forces beyond her knowing take her sister Amelia, though, she discovers that her childhood fancies were entirely too real, and is thrust into a journey that will take her back to that land she longed for, back to the childhood friend she'd abandoned, and to worlds she'd only dreamed of.

Interview with Pre-Reader Amacita
PresentPerfect's Review

Nobody really likes to move, you leave friends and loved ones behind, familiar surroundings and move to someplace that is different from what you are used to. You have to learn the ropes all over again, make new friends and find your way around, not an easy or fun thing to do.

But what makes a move like that worse, is when it happens and you sleep through the whole thing, doubly so when you didn't plan said move.

(Featured April 5, 2014)

Carl Lee is new to his job.
In spite of his inexperience, along with coursework deadline induced bouts of sleep deprivation, and a serious caffeine reliance, Carl has made it through his first academic year as a secondary Science teacher, and his Twenty fifth birthday is on the final day of summer term to boot!

Things are looking good, but this summer break will be far from relaxing.

Contains strong language, alcohol abuse, and some mildly descriptive violence.

A side fic to Five score, divided by four. from twisted spectrum. if you haven't read it yet, go do that first! it's much more substantial that this little pet project. Now shoo! there's the link.

Five score, divided by four

Cover art by Dahtamnay

“You know how when you're at a party, and you use what you didn't realize was a magic letter to Princess Celestia to roll a joint?
I guess maybe that's not, uh, a thing, but yeah, I did that this one time. It was at that huge party Shannon and Adam had a while back. You know, Max's friends? …No, Celestia's not one of—They wouldn't know each other...
But anyway, yeah, in case you were wondering why I'm all like, a girl unicorn now, that was kinda the short version.”

Meet Rob, a 27 year old musician who gets more than he bargained blah blah blah
Get a front-row seat in his brain for the Long Version, as he wracks it trying to weasel out of being a pony, or at least not let anything slip by as he takes it one freaky moment at a time.

What will the other lost-weekenders think when they walk in on him passed out on their couch? Will he be able to get through the city and at least back to his apartment, if not to normal? Will he learn anything about REAL friendship along the way and stop being such an insufferable hipster? What if some blowhard fan author just couldn't “turn it off” and ended up trying to write a pony story as actual sci-fi? Will Ahuizotl get the statue? Does P=NPony? Can you grab me another beer while you're up?
And did that letter ever get to Princess Celestia?
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Your standard pony Trip Report, with your standard pseudo-autobiographical narrator, written to flush out my creative plumbing and play around with, uh, like, good...thinkies and word-putting, and because the urge to do it just wouldn't leave me alone, so I just had to get it outta my system. I just really like the juxtaposition of humans and ponies, I guess.

Title is obviously a reference to M-Theory and Tristram Shandy, respectively. Because I can never pick just one thing.

Rated T for Adult Situations, gratuitous overthinking, and fuckloads of swearing. Oh and I guess drug use.

I was set on having a day filled with playing games and chatting to some online friends. That was I DID until I woke up in the body of a particular pony. Her name: Nightmare Moon. Well there goes my masculinity, along with my life. Need I say more? Oh yeah, ROAD TRIP!! Teen for language.

For the PonyEarthverse.

After his mysterious arrival in Equestria, Rick made great friends and had great adventures. But when he dies on one of these adventures, he gets reborn. This time, he is not human but a unicorn. What will this mean for him and the Mane 6? Will magic make his life easier, or will his adventures get more... adventurous?

Sequel to A New World, A Fresh Start
Continued in An Earthbound Honeymoon

Please let me know of any grammar or spelling errors.

Orion wasn't always a pegasus... as a matter of fact, he wasn't even a pony. He was once a human, a Brony even. But one night while dreaming of life in Equestria, he accidentally makes a wish that Luna is all too happy to oblige. So what happens when you're lucky enough to be plucked from life on Earth to live as a pony in Equestria?
Well if you're Orion, you get mobbed by a party whirlwind named Pinkie, accidentally get genderswapped by a distracted friend, entertain a Goddess of the night at a sleepover, and get into situations with a certain red farmer that start rumors that you're both colt cuddlers...

and did we mention that that's just the first week?

Buckle in for a long ride, because the story doesn't end until things turn normal again, and as we all know, normal doesn't seem to exist in Ponyville.

contains feels, romance, adventure, comedy, and of course, a Human.... just don't tell Lyra...

EDIT- Story is on hiatus as of 12-23-2013 for editing and rewriting. So far, the expected date for the next update will be sometime in late January, early February.