The simple affair of Twilight's breakfast takes a turn for the crazy as she and Pinkie Pie find out just how hard it is to open a banana.

Art by AspergerGoodness.

Now featuring a Polish Translation by the fabulous aTOM for The Polish Writers Society!

Have you ever woken up somewhere you don't recognize? I have, once before. This time was not all that different. Headache? Check. Dry mouth? Check. Upset stomach? Check. Hooves? Uhm, that one is new.

Hi, I'm Bruce and I'm 32. Currently, I'm in a light blue Earth Pony foal's body no one has ever seen before. The rest of Equestria thinks I'm 9 and something really traumatic happened to me. It doesn't help I swear like a sailor and I could really go for a smoke right about now. I just hope that the Everfree Forest, rampaging monstrosities, evil dark abominations against God and the Cutie Mark Crusaders don't kill me before I have just one last drag.

Oh, and ponies are hella creepy when you really think about it. Geez.

A little comedy side project. EDIT: HAHA Main project. More characters to be added if I get that far. Categories might be refined as I write. Entire thing is unplanned except vaguely. Don't Expect excessive cursing to be written out, just hinted at. Oh, and as the character is a 30-ish year old in the body of a 9 year old, sexual jokes might exists but sex itself will not occur.

Special thanks to user Momomojito for the awesome-tastic picture! First fanart, I'm so HAPPY. I've gotten more since then! I should collect it all here. Collected!

A young man lost in the hilly embrace of a mountain sleeps the night away under a knot of tree roots. When he wakes he will find himself thrust into a strange new environment, the Everfree Forest. With only his pack and his experience as a Boy Scout to aid him, he must survive, make sense of his surroundings and with some luck, ultimately find his way home. What does one do after wandering beyond the edge of the map? And better yet...

What if you are not alone?

I have been reading fan fiction here for a while and wanted to give something back.
My first fiction ever so constructive criticism is welcome. Fair warning, it takes a while for me to write a chapter so expect gaps between updates.

[Hiatus notice: As of 10/1/2022 this fiction is on hiatus so I may focus on other projects and items, will resume at a later date.]

Rated teen for strong language

Awesome cover art by Carnelian. Seriously, the guy has major skills with how fast he drew this up.

and of course ALL CHARACTERS / REFERENCES BELONG TO THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS. “MY LITTLE PONY FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC” IS OWNED BY HASBRO

NO PROFIT WAS MADE IN THE CREATION / DISTRIBUTION PLEASE DONT SUE ME OR ANY PARTY THAT DISTRIBUTES THIS WORK (unless they try to sell it, then by all means go nuts)

In a world full of magic, mere words can pose a deadly threat. When simply reading a sign can instantly infect the unwary, and cases start to turn up all around Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle casts the only spell she can find that can give her the time she needs to find the cause of the plague. But then she has to figure out how to stop the epidemic... without being able to read.

Editing provided by Spabble
If you like this, try Rainbow Typhoon
Audiobook on YouTube and for download on SoundCloud
Spanish version translated by MIkimoco
Russian version

It occurred one peaceful night. Half of Equestria awoke to the sound like a double-shot thunderclap. A percussion heard in the skies and rattling windows from Apploosa, to Canterlot, to Ponyville. Nopony knew what it was or what it heralded for the world as it drew a line across the nation.

For Twilight Sparkle, this isolated incident might have faded from memory after a time, if not for the strange rumors of a creature sitting on the hill on the outskirts of town.

These are her thoughts given written form. These are Sparkle's Notes.

Report EVERYTHING to the Princess.

Pinkie Pie throws excellent parties. This is a fact of life, like Fluttershy being rather demure, or Rarity having a sense of style. But the fact is, Pinkie's parties cost bits, and her job at the bakery isn't supporting her passions anymore. So she dusts off her degree and opens a side business...

Run. Think. Shoot. Live. Pony.

On 5/16/02 (Human Calendar) and 5/16/11 (Equestrian Calendar), an immense resonance cascade event connected three different dimensions in a massive disaster that would change the face of their worlds forever.

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[ACCESS SECURE FILE: WHITE CANYON]

Doctor Phase Ray is not having a good day.
Things started off simple- system crashes, equipment failures, and daylight savings complications. But when a routine sample analysis goes horribly wrong, Phase Ray is forced into a battle for her very survival, along with many of her colleagues...

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[ACCESS SECURE FILE: BLACK MESA]

Doctor Gordon Freeman is not having a good day.
Things started off simple- system crashes, equipment failures, and ruined breakfast casseroles. But when a routine sample analysis goes horribly wrong, Gordon is forced into a battle for his very survival, along with many of his colleagues...

Twilight Sparkle decides to try a special herb the Cake's procured from Zecora, originally used to make Pinkie Pie less... hyper.

Done purely for comedy!

Rainbow Dash doesn't like anypony touching her hooves for a reason. While at a slumber party at Rarity's, Rainbow's closest friends are about to find out just what that reason is. She only wished that it was simply about getting the hiccups.

Currently being written by Antojo Pony .

So then, what would happen if a human baby ended up and was raised in Equestria?

Will they be a normal everyday worker? Will they be a Celestia Knight? Will they take over the world? Will they speed up Equestrias technology level with good old human ingenuity?

Honestly I have no idea!

So that's why I need YOUR help! You, the readers will decide their personality, their dreams, their... everything really. So lets get started!

Cover art made by ForestOfSpring