A millennium ago, give or take, Princesses Celestia and Luna were nearly defeated by the most powerful villain that they had ever faced, Grogar, the dreaded lord of Tambelon. Thanks only to the whims of random chance, the two princesses survived that encounter, but have been forced to live in fear of the time of his inevitable return. That time is now...

...But whatever revival was intended has gone a little... wrong. Behind the wheels of Grogar's body is the spirit of a slightly extremely eccentric human. Equestria would have been lucky to survive the real Grogar, but will the ponies fare any better with this loon ruling Tambelon?

Sex Tag For Sexy Times Reasons, Gore Tag For Gorey Time Reasons.

You. Have. Been. Warned.

In Equestria, legend tells of a pony, all the colors of the rainbow, who will grant the wish of a pony whose heart is true. Tread lightly, though, for it is not a wish to be made without careful consideration.

The Rainbow Pony will grant a wish only if the wisher completes a unique task. Suffice it to say, these tasks are not what you’d expect.

If the Rainbow Pony gives you something wrapped in noctis wings, you will automatically know your task—words need not be spoken.

Some say that the pony’s colors on the outside compensate for the darkness on the inside, so think carefully before you attempt your task…

Edited by Shahrazad
Cover art by me

Now featured on Equestria Daily!

Spike, while browsing his selection of naughty magazines, accidentally coughs and breathes flames. The magazine gets sent to Princess Celestia. Panic ensues.

Twilight Sparkle is an expert in unicorn magic, but earth pony magic remains a mystery to her. The books in her library have very little information about the earth tribe's abilities, other than their famous strength. Twilight is determined to uncover their secrets.

What she learns will change her life.

And it just might change Applejack's life as well.

Featured on Equestria Daily.

This story is a sequel to Why No One Messes With Celestia

In the wake of Celestia's return to Equus, the ponies have worked tirelessly to prepare for the arrival of the Ascended. Defenses have been set up, weapons prepared, allies warned, but most important of all in the minds of both Diarchs, a cure for the Indoctrination has been pursued.

The Ascended, or the Reapers as they are known to the rest of the galaxy, are not amused. They attack in force, unwilling to stand by and let this small, barely space-worthy race of unascended quadrupeds neutralize their most effective weapon in their march towards galactic cleansing.

Now they too shall learn to fear the dark, and the Princess who controls it.