I'm a human, and I just woke up in this really freakin' weird place. Why the hell does everyone hate me so much?!

anonpencil helped

Narration by Lector Readings

At first, Princess Celestia was only in your bed. Then she was still in your bed. Now, she has stolen all of your bed sheets and refuses to leave that same bed.

So what could this have to do with the fate of all mankind?

Spin-off of Princess Celestia Is In Your Bed.

Entry into ocalhoun's Big 250K Contest.

Now with a youtube reading! HERE!

Princess Celestia is in your bed, and you don't know why: what do?

Cute, funny, and short. Have fun reading!

Proofreading by RaylanKrios.
Now with audio reading by CaptainBron3y
Second audio reading by MeloncholyIguana.

Based on this story:
Princess Celestia is (still) in your Bed
Princess Celestia Has Stolen All Your Bed Sheets
Drunk CelestAI Is In Your Bed
Fimfic Authors Are In Your Bed
Princess Celestia is in Your Washing Machine

This story is a sequel to Linguistic Walls

Artwork edited by me, original work made by nobody. Proofread by the amazing WrittenWord333.

Three months have passed since you were able to ever so cleverly deduce that Celestia had adopted you, indeed NOT trying to be your lover, and things have been absolutely terrible ever since due to nightmares that are making you question what is fantasy and what is reality. Not that mom would know, you've done a pretty good job of not letting on that anything is wrong. You two not speaking the same language makes it easier too, but you're still being kept on your toes by your aunt, Princess Luna.

Though you still have a way to go the lingual gap is closing slowly and during the process you've learned of Luna's prowess and abilities concerning dreams. Your only reprieve is that she seems to be having trouble accessing your dreams for some reason or another, but now the clock is ticking until she finds a way in.

Years of ingrained independence and the blurring line between dream and reality leaves you in a terrifying corner as even the pony you've come to care for the most may not even be real.

Featured 10/13/16, Thank you all so much!

It's been a week since Zesty Gourmand's hold over Restaurant Row was broken. Delicious food of dozens of different varieties is being prepared, and business has never been better.

But Zesty Gourmand isn't done yet. She's recruited Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and Prince Blueblood and intends on having their royal palates challenge Restaurant Row, starting with the Tasty Treat. The chefs of Canterlot face their biggest challenge yet as they prepare for a Royal Review...

A brutal battle against a savage beast nearly cost Princess Luna her life. But little did she know that this would change her life, and all of Equestria, in ways that nopony could imagine.
***
Rated Teen for limited violence early on.
***
I'd like to thank my two editors: TheMajorTechie and Rijo Striker. Rijo is a new author like me, providing good recommendations to improve my work. A special thanks to TheMajorTechie, my great friend, who has provided a lot of insight to really improve this massive story.

In a world where ponies and humans coexist in what can hardly be classified as harmony, Canterlot's daily regime is interrupted when one of these controversial creatures falls out of the sky and, to his surprise, doesn't die. This man seems to be the same as the rest, and calls himself "George Trestale". However, through a complete accident, George discovers he's developed magical abilities far beyond anything he could imagine. Unfortunately for him, almost none of them work correctly, and on top of that, he has no idea who he is or where he came from.

Thinking himself to be a god, and wanted by Celestia on the sole pretense of being human, our main character is tasked with running from the authorities, finding out what sort of power he's supposed to have, and most importantly, discovering who on earth he even is. Such begins the story of George Trestale, the unluckiest "god" in Equestria.

Rated Teen for some violence and language.

~ Edit From the Future! ~
This was my first remotely successful story, and as a result it's not exactly all that good, nor is it representative of my current writing ability. You can of course read it if you want, just expect things to be somewhat sloppily executed.

"You" are Anon, and you can't understand a bloody thing these little horses are saying. It doesn't help that you're only ten. Oh well, at least they're nice. Especially the queen horse, Celestia. At least that's what you think her name is. Anyway, she's awfully cuddly, always hugging you or some such. Honestly it's nice and all, but you are starting to wonder just why she is so affectionate...

Was bumbling around /mlp/ and made a thing. You might enjoy it, you might not, it's here either way.

*EDIT* Now with sequel: Bridging Words.

Featured May 10 2016, thank you so much!

After ascending to Princesshood, Twilight decides that it's time to really take the notion of "A Sound Mind in a Sound Body" to heart. She has the "Sound Mind" bit down (mostly), but years of sitting inside hunched over a book has given her quite a bit of ground to make up on the "Sound Body" front.

Fortunately, she has an athletic friend to help her out.

Rainbow Dash develops an acquired taste.

At least, that's what everyone thinks.