• Member Since 18th Jan, 2015

Anonymous Potato


When I was twelve, my Dad and I had 'the Talk.' "Dad," I began, "When a boy and a dictionary love each other very much..."

funnies 115 stories
Found 113 stories in 35ms

Total Words: 1,114,838
Estimated Reading: 3 days

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T

Colgate is a pony of simple pleasures. She wakes up, goes to work, avoids whatever nonsense is plaguing the city of Ponyville today, and heads home, leaving better suited ponies to clean up the weekly mess.

Until one day she wakes up, and it is not tomorrow.

This begins a series of circumstances that will eventually culminate with a conversation with a star, a lifesaving mattress, several pieces of magical cutlery, a series of one-hit KOs, and a chase through the past and the future for the fate of all Equestria.

Just a normal Tuesday in Ponyville, even when the exact date is negotiable.


An entry in the Most Delightful Ponidox, written, rather experimentally, in first person present tense.

Cover art by KozachokZRotom

Chapters (5)
E
Source

An out-of-work Tempest Shadow has opened an eye clinic near Ponyville. Nopony is sure if the doctorate hanging in her office is official or why her retinoscope features under-barrel attachment points. And most can agree that it’s best not to ask where she got a permit to perform retinal cryopexy.

Still, she seems to know what she’s doing, and all licenses to practice appear to have been filed using the correct format and proper guidelines. That makes everything okay. Right?

Chapters (1)
E
Source

The Equestrian Architecturial Association sends an inspector to make sure Twilight's School Of Friendship is up to code. The school reacts with the appropriate amount of panicked hysteria.

An entry into HapHazred's A Change Of Pace contest.

Cover art vector by Ultra the HedgeToaster

Chapters (1)
T

James is good friends with a couple of ponies.

James is not aware that he has a disorder.


Inspired by Admiral Biscuit's writing challenge.

Chapters (1)
T
Source

A terrible affliction has befallen the peaceful town of Ponyville, and the lavender unicorn and her friends are right in the middle of it! And the edges of it. Heck, it's pretty much lavender unicorns all over.

A story unrelated to anything.

Chapters (7)
E

Twilight casts a new spell labeled as a "pick-me-up" that, among other things, gives her the ability to smell color and causes her to lose all meaning of the words "personal space."

Chapters (1)
T
Source

Celestia has ruled for quite some time,
let's go over her accomplishments entirely in rhyme.

(As a fair warning, there are some slightly mature themes and insults, please do not take offense to them. Everything will make sense at the end. Know that the poem (song) is being performed by two different individuals.)

Chapters (1)
T
Source

The generic story of how a black and red alicorn OC wakes up in the Everfree Forest with no memory of his tragic past.

This is not meant to be taken entirely seriously.

Everything is intentional. Everything.

(Woo, Twilight's Library approved!)

Chapters (1)
T

Pinkie Pie has always been a bit on the odd side, but when a prized possession of hers goes missing, Twilight learns something about her that may change everything she thinks she knows about Ponyville's premier party pony. Filled with innuendos, awkward silences, and what this sleep-deprived author emphatically hopes is humor, Pinkie's quest to find her missing "plaything" will be an adventure for her, a nightmare for her thoroughly confused friends, and almost certainly not related to this song in the slightest.

Seriously. Not one bit.

Chapters (1)
E

Your Twilight Sparkle ran into a problem and needs to restart. We’re just collecting some error info, and then we’ll restart for you. 


As Seen on Equestria Daily!

With special thanks to Georg for beta testing and debugging services.

Quality Control team:
Georg
Zen and Ponies

Chinese localization provided by Miracle_

Chapters (1)
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