For a human that ended up in an alien world full of talking ponies, you've been living a surprisingly boring life. Sure, you have friends and go on adventures and stuff, but you don't really have a "purpose" per se. At least, you didn't until about a month ago, when a "heinous villain" that had been turned to stone went missing from Canterlot. Now, there's a washed-up queen crashing in your basement and stealing your love.

If only you could get her to admit that she doesn't actually steal it from you.

Princess Luna was always known as the solitary princess. She spent much time in her room, attached to none else other than her sister for their trade of the heavens. She was a very lonely princess, even if it appeared that she preferred the isolation.

Twilight Sparkle found an odd book in her shipment from Princess Celestia. Hoofbound and unlabeled, reading it opens a door she cannot, and will not, close with the youngest diarch.

She will not let one of her friends hurt alone, not on her watch.

Coverart is temporary until I can make my own.
(Featured 2/24-27/22, huzzah!)

This story is a sequel to The Runaway Bodyguard

Now includes AU sequel starting with Ch 31: Starlight and the Persistent Princess. Starlight Glimmer's magic is self-taught. To fix the holes in her education, she won entrance to Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. She has secrets, however, a past she wants to forget, and she knows how to fight very well. Despite her assumed name, certain facts are discovered—fortunately not by Celestia. She really wants to attend the school, and must compromise with ponies who want her as their tool. Sometimes it sucks being popular!

[Ratings are weird. I suspect instant downvoting. PM to discuss.]

The Enforcer and Her Blackmailers is the original story in the Enforcerverse. It was originally a standalone one-shot, and I’ve tried to preserve that feel. (The characters demanded I write more after the fact, including the prequel.) Remastering it added and corrected it with details from the prequel, carrying forward threads written four years subsequently. It is still standalone and can be read that way.

Carrying forward the threads from The Runaway Bodyguard implied a possible fulfillment of Celestia’s plans and Starlight’s education, experience, and uniquely fungible ethics—if I were to allow the one action by Celestia that prevents Starlight from becoming the canon “Our Town” Starlight in the show. I’ve added those chapters and they are clearly marked as an AU ending.

I've added the [Sex] and [Violence] tags. Nothing particularly graphic, but Starlight does talk from her experience, and some fighting has to be described. Starlight tells her story with brutal disregard for what ponies think about her. She is not shy.

Image (c)2016 by Riakoh-Illust, commissioned for this story. (Click source to see final artwork.) Titling by me.

Thank you to Javarod, the pre-reader for this story.

Sombra's takeover took everyone in the Crystal Empire by surprise. No one saw it coming, none were prepared for it, and almost no one got away. Almost.

A few hooffuls of daring souls managed to break out of the city and flee southwards, towards Equestria. Some ran to beg the Princesses for aid, others - just to save themselves and their families from the mad tyrant.

But as the refugees are about to learn, it's the dead of winter outside the Empire's shield, and the crystal ponies are far too used to their warm life in the city. One filly that gets separated from her parents while trying to get away learns that fact all too painfully...

Cover art by Marbo, Allfather of the Snowponies.

Additional tag:snowpony

This story is a sequel to The Witch of Canterlot

Sunset Shimmer needs a vacation. She doesn't feel she can really match the accomplishments of the ponies around her, and even though she knows leaving Canterlot is just running away from her problems for a while, maybe it's what she needs to get her head back in the game.

Griffonstone needs someone to save it. The griffons won't ever admit that, but it isn't half the city it used to be. The birds still in town do everything they can to leave, and the whole place is ravaged by terrible gale-force winds.

The earth roars! The heaven howls! The crowds cry out for a hero! Can Sunset really end a curse that's lingered for generations?

Her best and only magic teacher, Sunburst, abandoned her when he got his cutie mark and she didn't. Her butler and guardian, Proper Step refused to teach her magic, saying it wasn't "lady-like." Magic is in her blood, so she has no choice but to run away. She learns to fight with hoof and magic, first to save her life when she’s brutally attacked, but later because she is very good at it. She doesn't realize she's being honed to become somepony's sharp tool.

This is Starlight Glimmer’s pre-redemption The Gangs of New York and Anakin Skywalker Star Wars I, The Phantom Menace novel-length origin story.

The cover image is a commission by a very talented artist, Pony-Way. Please visit Pony-Way’s page.

About the warning tags: [Sex] Off screen, rare, unmistakable; [Violence] Street gangs, mafia bosses, prizefighting, becoming a bodyguard (naturally)—blood, occasionally. Please don’t be shocked and give the story a thumbs down because bad things happen to Starlight at a level that can’t be shown in show. Adversity always makes her stronger.

The sequel to this story is The Enforcer and Her Blackmailers. This is an Enforcerverse novel, and you can view that link if you want huge amounts of context.

A big shout-out to my pre-readers: Javarod and DoContra

Ever since Twilight blew back into Canterlot and insisted on becoming friends again, Moondancer’s life has been...better. Still not great, years of isolation can’t exactly be overturned overnight, but she is going outside more often at least.

One thing that is slow going, though, is getting her hygiene back under control. She had been doing the bare minimum for her mane and fur and unfortunately it was finally catching up to her…

That doesn’t mean she’s happy about getting a pity coupon. Moondancer is just going so she doesn't waste a gift. She doesn't really want to go. Honest.

CW - Heavy depression themes, self harm/self harm scars, and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Written for the Quills and Sofas Passion for Fashion contest with the prompt ‘faux pas’ and presented here with much expansion (this entry is over 5k words more than my original contest entry lol). Thanks to everyone who read and commented and helped me edit afterwards - you guys are amazing!

Cover art by me! (If you are an author looking for cover art, send me a dm!)

This story is a sequel to Still No Signal

To the point: Human in Equestria, Cheerilee decides to make a move on him and it works? Kind of? Something like that.

Anyways, I was writing a story about a blatantly self insert I mean... a human going to Equestria, but thinking about reasonable reactions and interactions ponies and the human would have (You know, the most cliché stuff you could ever imagine, but it was a guilty pleasure to write). So, I was avoiding ANY romance at all, focusing on language and culture learning and adaptation but then, last year Valentine's day came and I decided to throw everything trough the window and write a silly romance one based on it and... well, let's say it's on time this year! Kind of, because is not finished yet, but I suppose I could post it as incomplete and go from there. So, I will publish this cheeky cheesy incomplete story here and see what happens...

It may contain human x pony romance, references, fluff, traces of memes and other allergens, including subtle RGRE moments.

Added 'Narcotics' because there is a description of a hangover, and better be safe than sorry, I guess.

Lazy cover image screencap from derpi

NOTE: The 'prequel' is about the setting for this story, but is not required to read to understand this one. Actually, this one was published BEFORE the 'prequel'.

She's only been here for a few minutes, and yet she knows more about how things should work than anypony alive. Meet the expert on all things Equestrian, except how to pronounce or spell it (and if you're pointing that out to her, then you're just being racist). She knows how to fix everything, and all that's required to do so is to let her speak with the manager!

...the Princesses?
Are you sure there isn't a higher authority available?

(Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages. Due to minimal story length, this was a Patreon freebie.)

Rated C for Crackfic.
This story has no purpose in existing beyond my wanting to kill a Karen.

In the beginning, The Great Weaver brought together the world, from the mountains to the forests. Stitching it together, the Great Tapestry connects all living and nonliving things.

The Changelings found themselves especially connected to this Tapestry. Legend says that the first Changelings fell through the world as it was woven together, only to be caught on the First Weave beneath it all.

But what happens when something else is caught in the Weave?

Prince Phasmatodea, son of Queen Chrysalis, remembers what it was like before he hatched. He remembers being a human. He remembers dying. And he fully intends on avoiding another death.

But being gifted a new life does not matter when one failure, one false step, will lead to your untimely demise in the Changeling hive, for Prince Phasma must survive his toughest adversary from the start: Mother Dearest.

Cover art as of 1/18/21 by Nixworld