Once upon a time, (if the term even applies) two young ladies, (if that adjective even applies) decided to visit a magical land of Equestria, selected seemingly at random from about a million.

• One of the two is a time traveler deprived of her time machine, the other is an eldritch abomination out of her element.
• One would prefer the world of pastel-colored ponies to stay as it is, and can’t help but alter it. The other one is anxious to see how it can change, and can’t help but maintain it.
• Both believe that this is not their story. But while they disturb the delicate world of ponies, they don’t even notice ponies doing the same to them.
• Sandwiches are involved somehow.

There are many things this story is and some things it isn’t.

It’s not a fix fic, no matter what some of the characters think. It’s written in multiple first person narration, which happened for a pointlessly clever reason, that will eventually become quite obvious. It’s not a crossover, it just comes with an unhealthy amount of backstory. It could be a rational-fic, but since idealistic philosophy is typically not seen as very rational, it’s only a philoso-fic instead. It’s quite meta, in the original definition of metafiction: fiction concerned with fiction as a concept. In any case, it’s either a small monument to overthinking things – I’m trying to reexamine many fanon ideas here – or a digital paperweight, I’m not sure which. It’s quite a bit more subtle than it could be, and everyone talks way too much when they should be having glorious adventures.
I know how it starts, I know how it ends, and most of what happens in between. Readers say it’s a slow burner, but we’ll get there eventually.

Acknowledgements

With special thanks to my editors, Thainen, Shrink Laureate, and MitchH.
Further special thanks to ScarletWeather and Themaskedferret for valuable input.
The artist who made the cover image stubbornly wishes to remain uncredited, but thanks to her anyway.

Chrysalis had come a long way from absolutely nothing - a humbled bug-horse left to fend for herself in the howling wilderness. But she's not the pony changeling she used to be, and she's set her hoof upon the path of conquest, for herself, for her crown, and for her children minions.

All she had to do was seize the commanding heights of the pony principalities, and feed her brood upon that endless supply of pony happiness which was her birthright, by all that was villainous!

If only her mother didn't keep tripping her up.

Every Friday, from five in the afternoon to eleven at night, Pinkie Pie does volunteer work. She doesn't have to do it, the world won't stop if she doesn't, but she chooses to do it anyway. Even if it's doing seemingly insignificant little things.

It is a matter of life and death, after all. Literally.

Pinkie Pie tries to fly internationally. What could possibly go wrong?

Inspired by personal experience.

This story is a sequel to How many friends have you made today?!

Things are a lot better for Anon since the events of Ponyville. His store is doing great and he enjoys the company of all his friends. As the days go on, he finds that the problems of the past are quick to haunt him as he is forced to face the one thing that hurt him the most.

I don't want to be here anymore, I want to go home. How much longer until they find a way to send me back? Each passing day is agony and I can't take it anymore.

(Thanks to PeerImagination for editing!)

Troubled. Disturbed. Stabbed. Entombed.

Sometimes, when you're playing a word game with a magical princess from another world, the words you choose aren't just words.

Dramatic reading by Scribbler and Neighrator Pony!

Now has an authorized sequel, written by Cynewulf!

This is a brief "Humanized Pony Visits Earth" tale, based on a minific I wrote for (but was unable to submit to) the July 2017 "TBD" Writeoff.

Rated "Recommended" by Titanium Dragon! "While the Pony On Earth thing might put some people off, here I felt like it made excellent use of the idea … This is a short and punchy piece, and I think a lot of folks will find it worth their while."

Reviewed by Chris! "It's refreshing to read a story with a clear, explicit moral that nevertheless doesn't beat you over the head."

Reviewed by Present Perfect! "Peering into the darkness of one's own heart is difficult and painful. But this is also about the nature of goodness ... plus, it'll teach you a really unique driving game."

Thanks to Morning Sun for prereading/copy-editing changes, and to Titanium Dragon for the story description.

Rainbow Dash has rather a poor reputation when it comes to her workload. Everypony always thinks of her as the pony who takes three naps during daylight hours, and four on weekends, and always seems to be looking for something to do to pass the time. All of this is true, of course. But ponies seem to think this means that she must not ever get very much work done.

Can the weather captain for all of Ponyville really be as lazy as she seems? Is that the only explanation for Rainbow Dash's free time and constant napping?

The weather is a full-time job. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. And the worst weather happens at night.

So weather ponies have strange sleeping habits.

Set before the events of the show.

Spanish translation by Spaniard Kiwi on DeviantArt.
Audiobook reading by My name is R on Youtube.

Set just before the events of chapter ten of Friendship is Optimal. One of the last living humans survives and scrapes by in the ruins of Eugene Oregon. He is approached by a simulacra of Twilight Sparkle, who promptly attempts to convince him to upload himself to Equestria. He balks at first, so Twilight plays to her strengths: studying.

Part of the Optimalverse.

WARNING: RATED TEEN FOR IDEOLOGY. This story attempts to take a realistic and balanced view of why an intelligent and religious person might not upload. It does not attempt to convince the reader to believe any of the viewpoints discussed. However, it is written in as unbiased a way as possible, therefore, both theists and atheists will probably find portions of it offensive.

This is my wife's story.

The Blight is a mysterious disease that lurks in the darkest corners of Equestria. Those it infects crave mayhem and will go to any length to spread mindless destruction.

The only cure is death, and the Pale Mare is bad medicine.

This story closely follows the events of canon, though few canon characters will appear.

Characters not tagged for spoiler reasons.

References and influences include Skyrim, Michael Crichton, Stephen King, and Piers Anthony.

Prereading by writer