Sunset Shimmer has had a long day. Intending to relax and blow off some steam, she has an eventful encounter with a recent diary entry from somepony she didn't expect.

This story now has an audio reading!

When the Royal Wedding scatters defeated changelings all over Equestria, a member of the hive winds up being captured in Ponyville, tied up, stunned, repeatedly shot by a cannon, and held against his will.

The truly frightening part is he’s starting to like it.

Thank you to my twisted editors: Tek, Seether00, GameKnut, Cerulean Blue and Peter
The picture Pinkie Pie uses Party Canon is from Atmospark at DeviantArt

This story is listed as comedy⁽*⁾ because the author has an odd sense of humor. No changelings were harmed⁽¹⁾ during the production of this story, despite what the newspapers printed or the ongoing lawsuit from the ESPCA⁽²⁾. The management would like to remind all readers to spay and neuter your pets. Unless your pet is a changeling, in which case…

(*) Dark humor, to be exact. If you are someone who finds pleasure in the misfortune of others, enjoys watching the occasional inept chainsaw juggler or cheers during a NASCAR crash, welcome home. Also, get help.

(1) Excluding blunt trauma, thermal impingement, chemical exposure, radiation, thaumaturgic infusions, and confetti ingestion. All characters represented, including changelings, are the exclusive property of Hasbro, no matter what they may shout at you from between the bars of their cell. Any violence or pain inflicted on the changeling in this story was simulated on a stunt changeling with special effects and mirrors. Except for the cannon. There is no truth to the rumor that Queen Chrysalis provided the stunt changelings from a supply of disobedient changelings in her dungeon⁽³⁾.

(2) Equestrian Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Arthropods

(3) The Changeling Kingdom does not have dungeons. They have Call Centers. It explains a lot, actually.

Here is a link to some appropriate background music to listen to while reading: Piotr Tchaikovneigh’s 1812 Overture

Additional Note: This story is tagged Sex because it has the occasional reference to… well, sex. There are no explicit references, but there are things.

Trapped on an long-dead world, the ponies of SG-1 accidentally awaken an ancient, dormant evil. With their lives at risk, they must team up with some unlikely allies if they are to survive and save the galaxy from destruction. What they find uncovers a story stretching back to the origins of their entire species.

A reimagining of the Stargate SG-1 story, set within the My Little Pony universe.

This story is a sequel to Celestia Sleeps In

After the accidental discovery of humans, Celestia tasked Lyra with learning about Dale's culture and Dale's language. Two meetings later, a misunderstanding caused Dale and a Coast Guard woman to be inadvertently transported to Equestria. With the two humans hospitalized and communication limited at best, the Equestrians just want to heal them, while back on earth the Coast Guard wants nothing more than to determine what happened to one of their sailors.

This isn't where I belong. I left all this behind years ago, moved on with my life. But a mare from my past brought me back, and now she won't let me go. So I'm stuck here, trying to make the best of it with ponies that don't understand me, don't even like me. But when something moves in the darkness, and when things go wrong in the cold, dead night, they'll turn to me to try to set things right.

Why? Because once a police pony, always a police pony.
~~
This is a spin-off story to 'Why am I Pinkie Pie?!', and will contain spoilers for that story, but it's not necessary to read that story to understand this one.
Cover art by the talented Conicer
Need more Cinnamon Swirl? Merlos the Mad wrote a fanfic of this story!

There is now a side-story: A Hard Day's Nightmare Night

After an argument with Luna, Celestia realizes that she is the only creature in Equestria who cannot sleep in. She enlists Twilight to help, and the two of them come up with a spell that will allow her to spend the night on a different world. Unfortunately, all their research failed to reveal that the world they sought was populated. Now, the Princess must decide whether to continue with contact, or destroy the only non-Equestrian witness to their existence.

Cover art is called "Sleeping Celestia" by Briskby

Vinyl lives a rough lifestyle, and it grates on more than just her health. When Octavia comes looking for her, Vinyl flees out of shame.

In a small town on the borders of Equestria, a little colt learns how to forge weapons from his father. But swords are not always friendly to the pony that wields them. As time goes by the colt must also confront the harsh lessons of the world outside the forge, and come face-to-face with the cost of protecting what he cares for.

Winner of the Ponychan March write-off!

A collection of short stories about ponies on Earth.

Simon and Twilight: Arrested with Twilight [Comedy] [Twilight]: An innocent road trip with a curious pony has an unfortunate outcome.

Simon and Twilight: Bacon [Comedy] [Twilight]: Twilight's unfamiliarity with Earth leads to her making an unfortunate culinary choice.

Lyra Cosplays Herself [Comedy] [Lyra]: On another adventure on Earth, Lyra decides to go to a convention as herself.

A Visionary Flood of Alcohol [Comedy] [Berry Punch]: While searching through her wardrobe for the last bottle of brandy, Berry Punch insteads finds herself in a strange new land . . . with a well-stocked liquor cabinet.

The Shortest PoE Story Ever [Dark Comedy] [Anon]: I regret nothing.

Big Mac Eats a Big Mac [Comedy]: Pretty much exactly what you're expecting.

I do everything I can to bring my son up right in the short time I have with him. I try to have an impact on his life, but I can only make do with shore leave and letters.

I raise my little Star mostly on my own, hoping he’ll be a good stallion one day. The times I look at him and see his father, I know I’m doing a good job.

We want him to surpass anything we could accomplish; that’s why we named him Rising.

[Guiding Star] [Squall Line] [Rising Star] [Gabriella]