Spoilers for The Last Nightguard · 7:41pm Aug 29th, 2022
One of the great things about writing batponies and Princess Luna is that you can take off the gloves, turn the volume up to 11, and let ‘er rip. Hidden behind the break here are two examples from The Last Nightguard (draft). Caution: Spoilers
Now, it still will be a few weeks, but I’m getting into the tying the knot up at the end and mopping up the blood stage (editing). Strange things happen near midnight when I’m writing, as you’re about to see. I’ve actually written the last scene (mostly) and chunks of the tail-end confrontation, but a couple of gems are too good not to share in advance.
Starting when Luna meets her first batpony after being purged of Nightmare Moon and returned to Equestria, a mere child called Peanut Brittle. (which I believe I shared before)
“The letter was most… strident,” managed Luna, who concealed a smile at the memory by studying the distant stars. “There were drawings within the margins and everything. Although the spelling was quite creative.”
“She certainly is a persistent little monster,” admitted Ebon. “And if I’m not mistaken—”
The hospital room door behind Luna thumped quietly as a small pony entered the room, only to stop cold at the doorway and gasp, with the thud of something hitting the floor.
“Princess Luna,” whispered a very young voice. “Mister Ebon Tide, that’s Princess Luna over at your window!”
“I think I know—” started Ebon, only to be cut off by the child again.
“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it’s Princess Luna! Am I supposed to curtsey or bow or shake hooves or what? Am I going to get into trouble? Mama says I’m not supposed to see her! Did she get my letter? Is she sick too? I only brought one bottle of pop! Should I go get another one? Do princesses drink pop? Is there something important outside your window that she’s looking at?”
“Peanut!” chastised Ebon Tide, much as if he were speaking to one of his own long-dead children. “Calm down. Sit!”
There was another quiet thud behind her as if a small rump were hitting the tile floor.
“Your Royal Highness, Princess Luna,” began Ebon Tide in the full rolling cadence of a Nightguard although skipping several of her titles, “I would like to introduce Peanut of House Glory, Clan Silversmith. Peanut and several other small relatives snuck in to see me a few nights ago, and I was rather rude to them. I’m glad to see that she has returned, and from the package I see on the floor in front of her, she brought a gift.”
“We are pleased to meet you, young—”
Luna turned around with a polite smile appropriate for the current occasion, with the smallest of lifting at the corner of her lips and her eyes hooded slightly. That is until she saw the small batwinged monster, and her heart nearly stopped in abject terror.
I thought they were dead! I thought they were all DEAD!
Second, when Ebon Tide is sparring with Luna and it goes somewhat differently than Diplomacy by Other Means.
Luna moved, and to Ebon Tide’s practiced reflexes and recent growth, she seemed painfully slow. As was her wont, she first swept across his legs with one wingtip in a blur of motion. He sprang into the air as a counter and stomped, catching the trailing edge of her wings and plucking a half-dozen broken feathers as if they had been cut with a knife. The new shoes he acquired several weeks earlier were proving their worth, moreso when he managed to parry a forehoof strike that followed. Sparks flew and Eb drifted backward to a gentle landing, his broad membranous wings giving him an edge in maneuverability.
“We are out of practice,” said Luna almost casually. She flexed a fetlock, then dropped into a crouch again. “Defend thyself!”
There was little holding back on Luna’s part when she darted forward again. Eb’s life immediately became one of instinct and reflex. The modern armor proved its worth several times in the next few seconds, deflecting strong blows or bites multiple times that should have struck home if Eb had not twisted or interposed the thin metal at the last moment. Never had he been struck this hard and fast before in his entire career, and yet he managed to roll or dodge what he could not block for what seemed like hours. There was an endless crash of steel on steel as Luna’s shod hooves darted and spun, hammering him like a tin pan on the anvil, but Eb could feel his heart beating even faster as their dance of destruction spun across the dusty sparring ring.
He was holding his own, and the sensation filled his heart with a song of destruction. Hammering alicorn hooves smashed and struck, but Eb sped up with every blow until a particular sequence of strikes left a narrow opening for him to strike.
He did.
Third, near the end where he is confronting Luna the second-to-last time in the story.
“Do you trust me?”
For an instant, Eb was tempted to tell the truth. The memory of that simple wooden box with a golden note inside nailed his hooves to the ground and froze the words in his mouth. “Yes,” he managed after grinding his teeth.
“I don’t think I heard you,” breathed Luna, looking entirely too pleased at his discomfort.
“I swore the oath,” snapped Ebon Tide through the boiling of the dark magic in his belly. “To our last breath, to the last drop of blood in our bodies, to the end of our days we shall serve thee. Forsaking all other oaths and titles we shall serve thee. No harm shall we allow, no blight upon your honor shall besmirch the Crown while we stand, united in your defense as brothers through life and unto death. That is the degree of trust we have given you. I have bled for you, I have died for you in all ways but the last, and by your actions, I have lived for you. What more do you want? What more can you demand of me? Shall I walk into the fire and burn until I am naught but ash? Spill my blood until I am dry as dust?”
Luna’s features softened, revealing a far more of an ordinary pony standing in front of him than the Royal Sister of before. “I call upon you for one last task which we cannot reveal. Only know that it is of greatest importance, and I would entrust it to nopony but thyself.”
I've always wondered what voice actors like Craig Nelson feel like when they get a part where they can really unwind and chew the scenery. I guess it's a little like this.
It sounds amazing, and I can't wait to reread Diplomacy , because all I remember is that I liked it, and I like how you write batponies
Poor Peanut. I think Luna might be about to scare the wings off her.
LInking to a previous story *and* the Incredibles? No fair, I only have so much willpower :(
5682924 Well, I am their biggest fan.
So... keeping in line with matters...
Also note these are just for yucksfolks. Georg is just putting up with my silliness and I'm just having fun
... For a given definition of fun mind. It might also be refered to as pathology
....................
"What about Celestia?"
Looking up from her work of healing on her bruised foreleg, Luna regarded the stallion a moment with a small smirk.
"Pray tell, what about her?"
"Well... what sort of fighter is she? I mean, we never really saw her on the field, so surely your martial prowess..."
"She held back."
"Oh come now..."
"In our early days, she gained her first title as Chain Breaker due to her vicious and decidedly brutal elimination of any slaver she encountered. When she refused the tithe of one of the largest of the zebra tribes and was challenged by their Queen, she bent the mare backwards and stuffed her up her own anatomy. Needless to say the tribes of that era ceased all predation of our coasts from then on and were quick to return our little ponies to us in short order, and the practice itself was stamped in near entirety just out of fear alone soon after."
"... And Chrysalis?"
"Lucky shot. Trust me, I challenged her after. She has not fallen lax in matters even during these days of peace and nothing short of fear of matters of Court going a-copper because of her seeking retribution has stilled her hoof. Best not test her my son..."
Wings rustling, Luna shook her head, a sad look in her eyes.
"I pray to never see her like that again, I truly do. The worst of it... as our enemies fell upon us... It was not she did not feel the pain upon her, the spears and arrows, the gashes and breaking bones she gained in her Wrath... its that it didn't matter. Until it is done, she will hound any who harm her herd and home without end, whether hers or theirs. And may you never invoke it yourself because not a one of this side if the Fields could stay your death."