• Member Since 26th Feb, 2020
  • offline last seen 14 hours ago

Buster Knutt Reborn


Welcome back to the cum zone

More Blog Posts83

  • 4 weeks
    Shower Thought

    I just realised I've been back on the website as a writer for nearly 4 years to the day at this point and I still haven't written a fic about Flurry Heart getting railed by her dad.

    I should really fix that one of these days.

    8 comments · 185 views
  • 22 weeks
    CMC Question

    What sizes/proportions do you guys headcanon the adult anthro CMC girls to have?

    I wanna see if there's a trend among my audience.

    18 comments · 578 views
  • 36 weeks
    Commissions Closed + Minor Unfortunate Update

    As the blog title states, I'm gonna be closing my commissions down and not taking any new ones for the forseeable future. You may ask 'but Uncle Buster, didn't you only do one?' and the answer is 'yes, yes I did'. Unfortunately, it seems like my return to writing was a fleeting one and the spark has died out once again. Since this has been a recurring thing for years now, rather than saying I'm

    Read More

    4 comments · 621 views
  • 39 weeks
    PC Kaput Again

    Got my PC back after two weeks of it being in the shop and having every inch of it tested to figure out what the problem with it was. Everything came back green across the board with no issues and the fault couldn't be replicated.

    Got the PC back today and within ten minutes it started doing the same forced restart with no error message shit it did before I put it in the shop.

    Read More

    11 comments · 547 views
  • 40 weeks
    We Are So Back

    So my return is in full swing and I have gone from being unable to write more than a paragraph of horsewords to managing to work on a decently-sized personal chapter and then crank out an entire commission in 4 hours at my usual level of quality.

    I've gone from being writing impaired to nearly back to where I was in my golden age where I could crank out 4 fics in a single day.

    Read More

    6 comments · 258 views
Apr
28th
2022

I Have Embarrassed Myself Once Again · 8:51am Apr 28th, 2022

Anyone who called I was gonna fail to get these commissions done yet again, come and take your prize.

I thought I had it down to a science this time. I put in a slot limit, I paced myself out, I only wrote for a certain amount of time, I didn't pressure myself with time limits or anything of the sort. I thought this time I'd take on a small workload and chip away at it, completely pain-free.

Except that didn't happen. What happened was the same shit that always happened, which is me having constant, blazing anxiety I can't rationalise away about failing to live up to expectations. For the last three days I haven't been able to eat, sleep, or relax properly whatsoever because I'm so terrified of the ghosts that live in my head.

So at this point, I am officially done with commissions. I set myself limits that a literal child would be able to work within, and if I can't manage that, I can't manage anything, and I'm completely hopeless. Refunds, like always, will be coming out over the next few days (two specifically won't be getting refunded until the first of the month because I literally don't have enough money in my account to give it back rn), and I'm as sorry as I always am for letting more people down, yet a-fucking-gain.

No more commissions. Never again.

Report Buster Knutt Reborn · 717 views ·
Comments ( 11 )

Dude…I think you need to seek a mental health professional. This is really getting to you. You almost sound like you need medication. This is really hard as a fan of yourself because I started reading the original lineage and while I can admit that it didn’t have the best pacing, I enjoyed a lot of the characters. And I hopes you would go back and tinker with the original version. I think your wicked talented and you need to go at your own pace. But I think you need to seek mental health resources.

Yeah man, we love your stories but your mental health comes first! I hope you're able to find a good job and a good therapist, because you deserve to have someone to talk to about this. Take care of yourself bud.

5653996

Oh, don't worry, I already have. I've been seeing mental health professionals for decades at this point and have been on anti-anxiety medications for years. They work really well for the normal day-to-day existence, but as soon as I step even the tiniest toe outside of my comfort zone, I completely fall apart. Every now and again, whenever I'm feeling brave, I try to push myself and see what I can accomplish, and it all collapses in my face, which is what's happened here yet again.

This is just how it works for me with everything, unfortunately.

5653999

Unfortunately, work just isn't on the cards for me. I was written off as mentally unfit for work due to my disabilities, so I kinda just... exist from day to day, trying to make hobbies financially viable. It always ends up either going nowhere or blowing up in my face.

5654002
well keep working bud, I have faith in you. We all do!

The ghost in your head that spoke of can only really hurt you if you let it, stay cool dude.

Hey, your mental health is much more important than the writing. Please, make the time for yourself instead of us.

On the patreon grind from now until forever

This might sound a bit weird, but like, my own experience as a writer (a writer who's been inspired by your great writing, even) is that I need quite some time to get any commission out. There's three components to this:

1. I can't write until I've "meditated" on an idea, and I gave it some time to form into a coherent story-concept in my head. If you give me a topic and ask me to write a commission, then I'll generally need a day or two to think about how I want to approach this idea. I think this is normal and healthy.

The same applies when it comes to the next section or chapter of a story. Like, once I've written some stuff I might need some time to form a coherent story-concept of the next section or chapter. It's a bad idea to get stuck with planning, but yeah, I think this stuff is natural.

2. I only have so much writing energy. I'm not using all of it, but writing every day is definitely really difficult for me. I can do every second day at best, and even that is optimistic. Also, if I write on some thing X for an extended period of time then I'll need to take breaks from X and write something else now and then.

2. I just need more time in general. Life is exhausting, all sorts of stuff is going on, and sometimes I don't have the energy to write for a full week or so (or I'm too preoccupied with other stuff). It's not great, but it is how it is. I feel bad about how long it takes me to write commissions, but overall It is completely fine to take some time with commissions as long as you're upfront about "Yeah, this might take a while since life just be like that sometimes."

I don't know, just some thoughts. But yeah, when I write a commission the scale is "This might take a while." not "I'll have this done in a few days." Making that clear from the start and not having intense time pressure helps, even though it's still a bit stressful.

Buster, dude, I'm glad you are back, but I'm seriously worried about your mental health state.

I don't know what it is that you need, but I feel like I owe you at least a bit more than a few words whenever you depart or return.

Are you a part of any discord groups, messenger chats or telegram channels where you can just shoot the shit with people? Because that seems like it would be a good first step to being able to communicate what's happening with you a little bit better.
And I genuinely hope you understand you have a lot of people rooting for you dude, we all got love for you, to the point where I check a website for a fanfiction site for a show I haven't actually watched in 6 years because I like the community and the writing better than anything else. And that is crazy to me, but worth it because there is a lot of good here.

Shakespeareicles obviously said his bit.

Intricate disguise is also British and also going through his own shit right now.

I'm just some asshole who occasionally writes cyberpunk speculative fiction and likes pony butts, but I want to at least be there for a member of the community when he's feeling down and out.

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