My Review of BEE Movie · 2:21am Mar 25th, 2022

Rating Scale:

12/10—a complete masterpiece; flawless and outstanding
11/10—Excellent, near-perfect film
10/10—the standard rating; awesome film with a couple of flaws
9/10—a wonderful film with several flaws
8/10–a great film with numerous flaws but not enough to ruin it
7/10—a fun and entertaining movie; not great but still enjoyable
6/10—a slightly above average film; it is something I might watch again
5/10—mediocre movie; not awful but not great either
4/10—a below average film; it could have been much better
3/10—a bad film; poorly written and poorly executed
2/10—a very bad movie; the few good things in the movie overshadowed by the bad things
1/10—a terrible movie; a total waste of time
0/10—a worthless piece of abomination; should have never been made

Greetings, everyone! This is Mr. J back with another movie review for tonight! This evening, I will be reviewing DreamWorks’ BEE Movie from 2007. This is yet another family-fun movie I watched when I was a kid and thought it was highly amusing and entertaining for some reason. This is coming from someone who has a strong phobia for bees and wasps since childhood. Kinda ironic, isn’t it? But of course, as I grew older over the years and looked back at the film with a more critical look thereon, I internally cringed at almost every single scene in the movie that involved the main characters and the plot of the story. In other words, this movie is a gigantic fever dream that went on an acid trip.

This “movie” is about a bee named Barry B. Benson who graduates from college in a few days (wtf??) and has to work in Honex by being able to work at one job for life. Uncomfortable with that fact, he heads out to the outside world and discovers what he’s been missing out on. Although forbidden by law to talk to humans, Barry does it anyway as he meets a human woman who saves his life. From that point onward, he beecomes a changed bee.

Ugh, even I had to shake my head at my own bee pun. Speaking of which, this movie is cluttered with dumb bee puns that are neither subtle nor funny. Not to mention the amount of cringeworthy humor that took me out of the movie. Seriously, were the writers on crack when they wrote the script for this? I can’t even imagine what Jerry Seinfeld must have thought when he read the script and read his lines.

Also, it’s very clear to me that the people who both wrote, produced, and filmed this movie did no research on bees whatsoever. Worker bees are female, and drones are actually male bees with no stingers, so the fact that they made all the bees act and talk like humans is just absurd. I get that it’s an animated family/kids movie, but they didn’t have to be seriously that inaccurate. Also, where is their queen during all this?

The animation models for the human characters look so ugly and weird...except for Vanessa and Ken. They look kinda decent in contrast to every other human.

Now to address the elephant in the room: the romance between Barry and Vanessa................what. The. Fuck........................

First off, it’s just wrong in every sense of the damn word. Period. Second, it’s even disturbing that Vanessa literally dumped her boyfriend in favor of hanging out with a talking, sentient honeybee. Are you serious, movie? That makes me feel incredibly sorry for Ken that he had to see his own girlfriend date a bee while he is left hanging in the darkness all alone and seeing that annoying bee remove all sanity from him. Come to think of it, Ken is the only character in the whole movie who acted normally and rationally during all this mess. While everyone was dumb enough to let things slide, Ken decided to take matters into his own hands and try to set things right...but in vain. Patrick Warburton did a good job playing the most rational character in the movie, no doubt about that.

I just find the plot to be so unrealistically stupid and insipid for my taste. I mean, suing the human race for stealing honey? Great, so not only is Barry okay with bestiality, but he is also okay with being a Karen. It makes the movie so unbearable and cringeworthy to sit through. I have nothing else to say about this mess of a plot.

Lastly, what did we learn from this movie overall? That flowers can instantly grow back to life after months and months of not being pollinated even though that’s not how it works in reality. So if you do something that will do more harm than good with a long-lasting effect, just hope that things will instantly get back to normal with no problem whatsoever! It will be super easy, barely an inconvenience! Something that Disney loved to make classic boring fairytales about back then. Ugh, this movie is so bad that it’s....not so good. This gets a 4/10.

*sigh* Finally, I got this off my back. Have a good night, ladies and—

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GO AWAY!!!!