Venting Out My Emotions · 1:50am May 30th, 2021
So, this has been an ongoing issue that I've tried so hard to ignore but it has been building up to the point that doing so is no longer viable. If I may, I want to... vent my emotions for a bit.
So for the last few months, I've been dealing with several things (on this site and IRL with the latter being somewhat doable). I've had several users be... difficult to say the least when it comes to comments. Now, I'm not gonna pretend i'm completely innocent on the matter/s but the point still needs to be addressed. When it comes to my stories, I've mostly had positive reactions with some... more well known users be negative on the matter.
Now, being negative in of itself isn't an issue so long as it's constructive and thoughtful. But I've had to remove/block one user due to how they would harass my editor (I would repeat what they said but that would out them and I'm not about to make the same mistake twice) but they were incredibly offensive and even after talking to them about it, they said they understood and wouldn't do it again.
About several months later, they do it again even after I warned them not to. So, I unfortunately had to block them for... I think a month. One of their friends(whom I still speak with) while also the reason for the issue, was more reasonable. One day, we got into a misunderstanding (and I wasn't exactly in the best mood back then) and so they blocked me. I went on a tangent and spoke about it via blog witch received some positive and a few negative responses. One of them being from the person that blocked me. The long short end of it is we're good now(although the person who harassed my editor still has me blocked as far as I'm aware).
Now, why do i bring this up? Because this all started back about 8 months ago when I had a consistent editor and several people seemed to dislike said editor for their behaviour towards my story(if anyone bad mouthed it basically). I did understand it of course to witch I spoke and told them I'll be trying to get a new editor. However, that's been unsuccessful because anytime I've tried to(I've tried going to groups like Editors R US) I've gotten no reply and often times two down votes just for asking for help witch is increasing not only my anxiously but also making me flustered/angry because it's a (and Pardon my launague here) damn if you do, damn if you don't situation and it seems like no matter what I do, I'm gonna get backlash even when I'm trying to do what people suggest. I wouldn't have an issue with this if it was consistent but it seems like people change their minds left and right to get an editor witch makes the whole thing more confusing/frustrating than it has any right to be.
I've almost broken down several times because I feel like everything is against me. Yes, I'm aware I'm being delusional to some extent but it doesn't help the fact I'm trying my best here and nothing wants to stick. The only thing that has stuck is my Siren AU story.
Well, now that I've got that out of my system, I can say I've calmed down a little. I'll be the first to admit I'm not perfect nor do I wish to be. I'm just as (if not more) flawed to everyone. I'm aware I've probably burned some bridges and hurt even more. With that said I just needed to have an outlet because I've been holding it in for to long and to those I've done wrong/hurt, I don't expect forgiveness nor do you have to agree with me. I just wanted to let my words known and at minimum, try to undo any/all wrong ive inflected. I wish everyone a good day/night and hope for nothing but good things.
You have every right to vent out your frustrations. We can vouch over how increasing difficult it is whether it concerns the need to find someone willing to help you or if it involves certain harassment that comes with no resolve no matter how hard you try. The fact of the matter is that for every amount of good people there are in the world, there's always the ones who are bad not because they may have a grudge with someone or because they don't know how to resolve their actions with a modest conversation, but the fact they are bad for the 'sake' of being bad. Like a part of the brain that is so broken beyond repair that there is just no going back when they are down their path.
Often times, you have been getting advice on how to handle these individuals (Whose names you are right not to bring up) and all of which are very good (Any other person would do so in a heartbeat). But at the end of the day, it is up to you and you alone to decide what needs to be done whether there is something going on or not. And if these matters cannot be solved peacefully, then it's clear that some people need to learn the hard way as to how their actions and choice of words hurt the people around them. If they are not going to learn from their ways no matter how hard you want to see the good in them, at some point in your life you must be willing to accept that the ones who 'can' be helped are the ones who are 'worthy', not so much 'deserving'.
I sincerely hope you'll feel better after having this chance to express your thoughts and look forward to what more stories you have to offer for your most supportive fans.
I hope you feel better after all that venting, I wish I could be your editor if I wasn’t so busy IRL, but I can try and help every now and then, if you’ll let me
Oof, sorry to hear that. The advice about finding editors is something I hear said a lot (not to me) but it's uncommon for someone to actually give a suggestion on how to get one, or offer to do it themself.
The only (active) group I know about is this one
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/97/looking-for-editors
Before too long I can offer to help edit for you again, but in the meantime, the best advice I would give is to try to reach a point where having an editor is a luxury, not a necessity, even if slows the speed of your stories coming out down. This is a reason why me having an editor isn't critical, but would be helpful and, depending on how much they'll do, possibly save a lot of time.
I can give some tips on how I tried to do it, and if you haven't done one or more of them, they may be useful.
1: Make sure you have a grasp of grammar rules. I've often done it by checking out some websites about it, and I've gone to it a lot, and I still do when I'm not sure about something.
2: When you do have editors, try to learn from them, so you may become able to do it without them, or at least it would be a start. If they change something, especially when it's not just a misspelled word, consider asking what did they see that made them do it. That could help you know when to do it if it wasn't some one-time thing. This is why, when I was editing for you and when I made a change that wasn't due to a misspelled word, I often told you what I saw and why I did the change instead of just doing it. It was intended to try to help you with future stories, even if I wouldn't be able to edit it.
I don't know of any tips on how to speed up editing so it doesn't take as long. That's a tip I could use.
As for the flame war-like drama, I don't remember seeing it in the comment section of your last few stories I've read, but I remember seeing it in older stories. I have a couple of thoughts on what I saw, but while I could do it in a PM, I'm not going to go into details here. I'm not sure if mentioning it would even do much good anyway.
Don't hurt yourself. Anyone who attacks you or anyone else isn't a real fan.
5527003 I'm thankful for you not bring them up here. I'd rather not deal with it again. I'm aware having an editor is a luxury but I'd rather them not be down bombed just for knowing me