• Member Since 17th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday


loves tiaras.

More Blog Posts197

  • 1 week
    If anyone can spare some thoughts of encouragement...

    ...please direct some to your fellow FiMFiction author sykko, who has recently experienced a terrible event, having lost everything in a house fire. At this point, they are not seeking any form of financial contribution but they would appreciate some words of support

    Read More

    2 comments · 151 views
  • 16 weeks
    Twilight Sparkle attempts observational stand-up comedy

    "I just gotta say—what's the deal with pegasi? Eh? Eh? That mare knows what I'm talking about! You, ma'am. Right there."

    "No, not you. That's not where I was pointing. Although..."

    "No, I'm sorry. I take it back. You also know what I'm talking about. Sorry. The stallion next to you also does, on further reflection."

    Read More

    21 comments · 495 views
  • 16 weeks
    Happy St. Valentine's Day, and, subscriber milestone!

    On the obvious human cognate of Hearts and Hooves Day, Cadance would like to remind you all that there are many kinds of love in the world. If you've got one kind of love in your life, that's great, but never feel ashamed of not having any one specific type of love. All are worthy of being celebrated.

    Read More

    32 comments · 275 views
  • 35 weeks
    New Pinkie story, new site author!

    Heya! Long-time site reader Feech has officially become first-time ponyficcer Feech with the story Pinkie and the Mysterious Time Doughnut, and I am jazzed as heck about it! I had the honor of being the pre-reader for this one, and I can honestly say

    Read More

    5 comments · 392 views
  • 69 weeks
    Hearts and Hooves, 2020

    Valentine's Day will, in the Western world, invariably mean that your local slice of popular culture is inundated with images and themes of love today. This can be amusing, exciting, or depressing, depending on who you are, where you are in life, and where you think you ought to be.

    Read More

    19 comments · 574 views

Happy St. Valentine's Day, and, subscriber milestone! · 2:50pm February 14th

On the obvious human cognate of Hearts and Hooves Day, Cadance would like to remind you all that there are many kinds of love in the world. If you've got one kind of love in your life, that's great, but never feel ashamed of not having any one specific type of love. All are worthy of being celebrated.

One kind of love that deserves being celebrated is the stupidly intense scrutiny of a cartoon that was never intended to withstand intense scrutiny. The illustrative example I am going to provide today is this word dump, written unironically in response to a forum post regarding the floorplan of the Crystal Castle:

I've thought about this a lot, but it's all mostly just speculation. There weren't ever enough consistent, unbroken transitions to map any kind of a canonical floor plan, unfortunately. On top of everything, it's not clear when the geometry shifts. While the castle itself clearly has an open plaza beneath it, the use of dark magic on the throne creates a straight stairway of unimaginable depth into the earth, which suggests that there's clearly some House of Leaves stuff going on. If you are cleaving to any kind of geometry, the best that you can say is that the dark hole in the earth violates space, but it (eventually) warps you to normal space, the central column of unimaginable height with a single spiral staircase running up it leading up to the tip of the castle where the Heart was concealed. This may plausibly map to the distance between the fundamental floor of the castle (i.e. the level of the throne and the balcony) and the height of the tower, and the tower is in fact quite tall, but the sheer amount of time Twilight needs to climb up/skate down it in "The Crystal Empire, part 2" suggests that it too has some space-warping properties.

Even leaving aside the question of dark magic, what few transitional shots that exist are woefully inconsistent. At about 13'40" in "Games Ponies Play," Peachbottom walks in front of a window in the rotunda which clearly shows the tiered, covered staircase leading from the rear of the castle to the Equestria Games stadium in the distance. No other structure in the Crystal Empire looks like this, and there is no conceivable way that a room inside the castle's superstructure could show something leading off the back of the castle at that angle. Further complicating matters is the fact that Twilight enters the rotunda from the doors opposite the windows (13'53"), has a brief conversation with her friends and trots out at 14'20" to some kind of long axial hall, then disappears down a staircase that is clearly opposite the rotunda at 14'30". At 14'42" this staircase is seen to be the exact same staircase glimpsed at a distance from the windows of the rotunda, an utterly impossible leap.

This is all leaving aside the concept that, at 10'34" of "The Crystal Empire, part 1" the throne room has an exterior door that appears to open directly to the outside to a vista of the Empire at far closer to ground level (based on viewing angle) than any structure within the castle should be able to provide; but in the very next episode, the throne room's exterior door instead opens directly onto an interior hallway ("The Crystal Empire, part 2", 6'50".)

Is it any wonder that I have always written Cadance's home as a sort of Fisher Kingdom fun-house, whimsically reassembling itself at will? Man, I miss this sort of micro-analysis. Whenever I do this I am inevitably reminded of that classic Saturday Night Live sketch where William Shatner goes completely ham on a group of convention fans for obsessing over the trivial details of an episode, exhorting them to "get a life!" I enjoyed that sketch, but I stop short of feeling convicted by it. Assembling chaotic elements into a coherent whole is its own sort of fun for enormous nerds, and no one needs to feel ashamed of feeling passion for trivial things, so long as it's done from a position of love.

Anyway, all of this is to say: I love you all, all 3000 of you. Happy another year of ponies, ponypeople.

Report Skywriter · 275 views ·
Comments ( 32 )

Long story short: Crystal castles, how do they work? :rainbowhuh: Twilight's is, if anything, even more unruly in terms of consistent geometry. Maybe there's something about magically charged minerals that does unpleasant things to coherent spacetime.

In any case, congrats on the three kilofollowers, and have a happy Cadance Day. :twilightsmile:

Anyway, all of this is to say: I love you all, all 3000 of you. Happy another year of ponies, ponypeople.

Happy Cadance Day to you, too, Sky! :twilightsmile: :heart:

Crystal Castle is haunted, boom, discussion over.

Happy Cadence Day. :heart:

Yeah, at this point this is my explanation too. Crystal castles are, just as a rule, bizarre eldritch Escher-esque structures that warp their own geometry through various quantum states depending on who's looking at any part of them—inside or outside—as well as their own sapient will. That's really the only way I can logically explain the base of Twilight's castle being so small as to be the width of a tree trunk, without having a very tight and inconvenient spiral staircase right behind the door.

(It particularly amuses me to think that Twilight's castle is playful about it, and actively messes with ponies trying to map the floorplan, to keep Twilight on her metaphorical toes.)

This is why I've characterized Namepending Castle as a capricious twelve-year-old, as opposed to the laid-back Tree of Harmony. Of course, that was before we got sparkling Twilight struggling to interact with beings who inhabit linear time, but I stand by it. Though I've never considered what the Imperial Palace's personality might be like...

Comics canon basically confirms? I mean, it's not undead per se, but it's literally called the "Crystal Ghost," so...

Author Interviewer

Whoa, that is a nice, big, round number. :D I find those pleasing! Congrats.

happy Cadence day, and congrats on the 3000, Skywriter!

As do I!

Listen, I've been around since 2012 and I have no illusions that there's even a fraction of those people still here and hanging on my every word at this point, but it's nice to know that at some point, throughout the past decade, 3k people decided that I was worth looking at.

EDIT: The pedant in me wishes to amend this post to say that there is in fact a fraction of those people remaining, because otherwise that would be silly. Figurative language and hyperbole and all.

Here's to another three thousand more.

Aw, thank you. This was so warm and loving. It really reminded me of how happy it would make me to really delve deep into some random thing I was into, no matter how small. That's beautiful. That's love. Thank you for the reminder. :twilightsmile:

Edit: And happy Valentine's/Hearts and Hooves day!

Congratulations, sir! :twilightsmile:

May the world calm enough to grant us all headspace enough to nerd out over something minor but fun in the days ahead.

Happy belated Cadence Day wishes to everyone!

Here in Finland, Feb 14th is celebrated as the day of friendship, which makes it especially magical. :twilightsmile:

Happy Hearts and Hooves Day, St. Valentine's Day, Another Year of Ponies, and anything else that might be applicable! :D

And thanks for said scrutiny, this example and in general. :)

Oh, yes, and congratulations on the number hitting that value! :)

"Though I've never considered what the Imperial Palace's personality might be like..."
...Aaaand in pondering that line, and then the differences in the rulers the Imperial Palace has had, and some other details, my brain somehow arrived at Sir Humphrey Appleby. So that's a thing in my head now, possibly. Thank you, brain? :D

... That works disturbingly well. The palace serves the empire, not any one ruler. No matter who happens to occupy the throne, it adapts itself to match, so that the empire may function.

I know, right? Kind of came out of nowhere (And who would have expected it?), but it just seems to fit.
Though I'm glad it also seems to fit for you and is not just my brain. :D (And, of course, feel free to use the idea should the opportunity and desire come up.)

I love how much thought you put into everything. Geekdom is magic. :twilightsmile:

I’ll have you know I’m still hanging on your every word, and I’ve been here since 2013. :moustache:

I remember years ago in college, whilst needing to write a paper due the next day, I instead belted out a three page response to a random blog post by a comic book artist about the clothes that Sonic the Hedgehog characters wear. He never responded, for some reason.

Over-analysis is what it's all about! It's part of the fun!

Of course, only my over-analysis makes any sense and everyone else's is wrong. :duck:

Anyhoo, congrats on 3000!! It's nice to know people are still active enough to follow writers. In fact, given this milestone, as well as its alignment with Hearts and Hooves, I think this occasion deserves a celebration! Such as a story, dedicated to the patron saint of the holiday.

A story about Cadance.

That someone should write.

Someone who writes Cadance stories.



Heh, Mi Amore Influenza was my attempt to do that. Not sure I've got another one in me?

Weellll I don't mean it has to be about Valentine's. Just Cadance! Poor, poor neglected Cadance. With nary a story to her name. Trapped in a veritable desert. Alone. With no one to tell her story. On the cusp of being forgotten--lost!--falling off the face of the earth, to tumble endlessly in oblivion. Forever left wondering "If only if only!" Like a flower of the field, swept away by the wind. Waiting, hoping dying for the hand of a single author to catch her, to remember her, to bring her back to life. To write her name once more!

(...am I laying it on too thick?)

That's funny, I was actually wondering if you'd seen that one. Haven't read it yet myself, but it definitely caught my interest.

Will we ever know what Shining Armor asked Cadance than made her know he was the one?

I swear I haven't given up in the series. Writing has been awful lately. :pinkiesick:


I’m very glad to hear that! Hope you can break through your writers block or whatever it is that’s holding you back.

A lot of it is the webcomic, which is moving into its big finish this year and which has been taking up a lot of my writing brain.

What is the name of the webcomic? I missed this development

I co-write Skin Horse with Shaenon K. Garrity, and have done so for going on 12 years now. :twilightsmile:

I’ve never heard of it till now, but that’s pretty cool!

Login or register to comment