Very Blunt Question: Does anyone even care for the FireRain brand, or are you glad it's gone? · 4:33am Dec 29th, 2020
Okay, I'm going to ask a very straight-forward and blunt question: Did anybody really like or care for the name brand of FireRain?
Personally, I ended up hating the OC and the name along with all I created with it for some reasons I have only told maybe two people. But I never asked my followers or others who have known me for a while if they even liked me as FireRain?
Simply put: did you like the name? Did you like/hate the OC? Did you wish I kept the namebrand as it was? Do you wish I never held a makeshift funeral for FireRain? Do you wish I kept the OC avatar? Etc.
That's literally all I'm asking. I want to know if, taking into account the above questions, if you wish I never dropped the FireRain brand and kept it going, even if I hate it myself.
Hey man, long time no speak.
I've seen your blogs, but have been going through issues myself.
I have dear friends who I consider family stuck in another country whom I have been trying to keep contact with... keep spirits up... you know.
(Yeah, I know I said at one point that "I feel that we are brothers separated by continents"... I could only deal with so much these last few months.)
And work + money crap? Feeling kinda desperate. Have been for a while.
I keep telling myself that things are improving. They may be, yes, I will believe that.
So mate, that's why I stopped replying to your blogs suddenly and I kinda feel like shit for doing so.
We all go through bad times, and I go through mine by staying silent and processing it internally.
When you revealed that FireRain was the name of an OC and even supplied a picture of her, that's when things were going shit for me, and I didn't bring myself to the table to respond.
We've had enough chatter in the past to be considered fair acquantainces (even friends), and even spoken over PM a bit, and I kinda dropped the bat and left a friend (you) hanging.
Blah... what else to say mate.
If you needed support, sorry I wasn't there as a sounding board.
That being said.
I actually liked the name FireRain more than Ribe of Phoenix.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but by Phoenix... you were going for a sort of rebirth by fire thing? As phoenix's do?
FireRain sounds like a good union of opposing forces.
Again, I only saw your OC once - when you retired her. I had no idea she was an OC before then.
The OC funeral?
Eh, we all need to cut our past at times.
It is hard knowing what to hold onto.
Things started feeling really shitty for me back then, again - sorry for the silence, I had known you more than a passing acquantaince and feel like an arsehole for staying back.
Understand that I was working through my own demons.
I hope to continue seeing you.
As I've saif before, consider the EQD forums - I go there on occassion - it's probably my biggest social outing.
So for the time passed, please understand my distance. It wasn't personal or from lack of care, it was just too much for a while.
Cheers, Gyro.
5424794
Ah, yes, that's a struggle I'm all too familiar with; work and money, losing sleep and stressing like hell over it. Matter of fact, I went to an interview yesterday for work experience and...yeah, I think it went shitty. Had no sleep the previous night, was exhausted and it more than likely showed.
Hang in there, man. No idea what it's like over there fro job hunts, but something will turn up eventually.
Look, man, I'm not bothered if a certain person drops out of the loop because they have personal things to attend to. That's something I do now and again. It's fine to drop out for a while, take a break. That previous comment didn't have any specific target, so sorry if it felt like it did. That was not my intent.
Yes, that's right. That was supposed to be the whole purpose of the FireRain persona. It technically ties into some of my own personal beliefs of life after death, but perceive that however you wish.
About 'cutting out our past', that's no exactly true given that it's also my present. That's why I have so much hate/strong distaste for FireRain. When you look into a mirror at yourself and see something you try to hide but it's clinging to you like a malignant tumour? It's more or less the same. I see a side of myself I hate to acknowledge exists. Besides, I got the impression nobody gives a shit about FireRain as an OC or a personality. The name only stays because it's my longest-serving name that's only now there so there's no confusion over my identity.
As I said before, t'is fine. We all have our own troubles to work out and it has impacts we either don't think about or don't have time to react to.
I'm staying away from EQD. That's one place I'm not touching with a 100-foot pole. I've never been a fan of that site, or those who frequent it/are on it.
All is fine on this end, Gyro. Nothing personal and no harm done. I'll be going silent for a while shortly (probably anyway) once I go back home permanently. Still got to manage YT but been so f-ing exhausted to have the energy to keep up in the midst of other things. Trying to sell some personal things to make more space. Easier said than done when it's specifically my instruments and mentally trying to part with them!
Peace and love.
- FR
Hey again.
About looking in a mirror?
Mmm, I see parts of me that I wish were different.
Maybe wish that I had travelled a different path or rather stayed on a path instead of quitting studies for other work.
But lamenting is bad, no matter how easy it can be as there are always people in worse positions. Heh, I learned that well a couple of years ago when I got burns to 20% of my body from a petrol engine explosion (servicing a lawnmower). Even though I needed surgery on all limbs, that was it. There were people in the department with faces half melted. So be grateful for what you have and use it well.
Life is a journey.
I need to keep telling myself that.
And sure. Glad to hear that your words were not directed. I was feeling bad there for a while.
Cheers mate. Gyro.