Paul's Thursday Reviews CCXIX · 8:20pm Sep 3rd, 2020
You know what my greatest weakness is? It’s video games. When I was a kid my parents bought me and my sister an NES, and I was all over that thing. In my teenage years it wasn’t uncommon for me to spend 18-20 hours a day playing games. My parents found the best way to punish me for anything was to just hide them. It was certainly an unhealthy obsession. The things I considered achievements as a child included beating the World 8 fortress legitimately, knocking out Narcis Prince in under three seconds, and defeating Ultimicia for the first time (always my favorite final boss).
Now that I’m an “adult”, I’ve managed to reign in that addiction significantly. My playing is usually reduced to only a couple hours a day. Which makes it hard to keep up with all the new stuff happening out there, believe you me. My Steam library consists of 137 games, and I haven’t played 32 of them yet.
But sometimes I fall back in, and it can take some time to claw my way out. My most recent failure is Starbound, which had been sitting in my library for a good year before I finally decided to give it a go. Sort of like a birthday gift to myself, if you will. I’m enjoying it so much that for a while all I wanted to do after getting home from work was load my game and resume my latest construction. As much as it pains me to admit it, my writing suffered critically as a result. By some miracle, I was able to produce ~1,200 words/day for the month of August. Which sounds great, I know, but not when I pulled off 1,800 words/day in July. That’s a 1/3 drop in production. I suppose it could have been a lot worse; I could have produced nothing at all.
I talk about all this because in the past week I find myself finally at a stage where I can get off work and have the willpower to resist that game’s siren call long enough to churn out ~2,000 words again. It’s always a good feeling when I’m able to do that. Feels like a personal triumph. Some people want to change the world, I just want to ignore my addiction long enough to write a scene or two.
Alright, enough of my first world problems. Let’s get to some reviews, shall we?
Stories for This Week:
The Perfect Little Village of Ponyville by McPoodle
Until It Goes Away by sidewayz2013
No More Magic by Darksonickiller
The Kissing Booth by CategoricalGrant
The Beach Kinda Sucks without You by elPossenreisser
Golden/Silver Shine by Regidar
Skyward Yearning by SPark
Forsaken Shores by garatheauthor
Seconds Late by FerociousCreation
The Worst of All Possible Worlds by TheTimeSword
Total Word Count: 548,190
Rating System
Why Haven't You Read These Yet?: 1
Pretty Good: 5
Worth It: 4
Needs Work: 0
None: 0
The Perfect Little Village of Ponyville
35,694 Words
By McPoodle
Vinyl Scratch wakes up in the basket of a hot air balloon over Ponyville. To her shock, she can see for the first time ever. Even weirder, she’s now Celestia’s apprentice and is on her way with Spike to run the Summer Sun celebration and “make some friends”. But she knows that none of this is real. She needs to figure out what the heck is going on before, Celestia forbid, she has to be the one to take down Nightmare Moon. Because that won’t end well.
This was nothing at all like what I expected, and that’s a very good thing. When McPoodle changes up a world, they really go all out. We’ve got Rarity as a brainwashing overlord, Applejack as a crooked con-artist, and Rainbow Dash as the ‘empress’ of a pegasus rebellion, just to name a few alterations. Honestly, it’s kinda awesome.
It eventually does lead to the whole ‘Nightmare Moon’ thing. The good news is that it goes completely differently from everything we know, from initiation to conclusion. I don’t think McPoodle repeated or recreated even a single step in the entirety of the story. Then we get that ending, which took everything we know and expect and turns it sideways. It’s even more surprising when, as the big reveal is happening, you come to realize that there were hints to it from the first few paragraphs.
By now I imagine it’s clear that I thoroughly approve of this story. Yet even this story has a few issues to nitpick over. Ultimately, I have just one major complaint, and that is the story’s background. McPoodle felt it appropriate to create this whole extra bit of background where Vinyl has become a regular tag-along to the Mane 6’s adventures, and generates this war that apparently happened in the last few years with the dragons, and made up a “Dragon Emperor” to serve as some great bogeyman for us to lump all blame on. All of this would be fine if it were at all true, i.e. if we had some canon or other stories set within this AU to back it up. But we have neither of those things, instead being given all of it here as if we should already know it.
I’m all for some extra background and worldbuilding, but this felt like the author was cramming far too much into a small space. I get that it’s all in the name of validating Vinyl being in the Mane 6’s little friendship posse for the purposes of the story and giving us a reason for the massive world change. Yet there could have been a far simpler explanation, easier ways to get Vinyl involved in all of this without turning the world of Equestria upside down. Also, can someone please explain to me why it is the one pony most qualified to do anything about this situation is nowhere to be found?
“But Paul, you just said you love this AU!”
It’s impossible to explain why what I’m saying makes sense without context, but it’s also impossible to explain the context without spoiling the story in significant ways. I can only recommend you read it for clarity. Which, no, really, read it. This story is fun and interesting and full of both charm and mystery. There were times when I thought the author was making a big mistake, but it turned out that most of those mistakes were just part of the author’s long game, and I am very impressed.
Bookshelf: Why Haven’t You read These Yet?
PS - Finish the series, author. You stopped in 2014. This is inexcusable. Finish it! 
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
The Invisible Hairless Ape — WHYRTY?
Until It Goes Away
6,881 Words
By sidewayz2013
Scootaloo has some strange nightmares…
In this story we get to watch an adult(?) Scootaloo as she finds herself going through multiple nightmares in a single evening. Once she finally wakes up for real, the latter half of the story sees her visiting Rainbow Dash to talk about them and what’s really bothering her.
When the story started, I was pleased. sidewayz2013 does a nice job with the dream aspect, making things quirky and unreal while seeming realistic. It really felt like this was a dream someone could have, which is a huge difference from every other dream sequence I’ve ever seen in fiction. That alone earned my admiration.
Then the dream ends with Scootaloo realizing she’s in a dream and knowing exactly what she’s looking at means. Oh, look, there’s my pleasure with all I said above crashing and burning in an explosive eruption of disappointment. I have had, on maybe two occasions in my life, recognized I was in a dream, but never have I looked at something while dreaming and told myself “Oh, I’m seeing this because of X, Y, and Z.” That Scootaloo is able to do this totally killed my immersion.
Then we have Rainbow Dash being an expert dream interpreter despite having only taken one class of psychology. Yeah, that’s not how it works. I took a psych class too, and I’m sure most college kids had to at some point, but I guarantee you the vast majority of them aren’t qualified to explain dreams. To make matters worse, the majority of the latter half of the story is just “you dreamed this, and that must mean exactly this.”
A more interesting and dynamic way to handle this subject would have been to not explain all the dreams away and let the readers interpret the events through Scootaloo’s actions. The way sidewayz2013 chose to do it is, frankly, just boring.
Kudos for an excellent start on what was easily one of the most realistic dream sequences I’ve ever read, but I’m afraid everything else in the story was a resounding ‘meh’. I’ll leave it on the middle ground, though, as I feel like a lot of my disagreements with the story’s directing is subjective in nature. I can talk all day about how I feel about dream interpretation in stories, but can’t say with any confidence that my experiences are common or ‘normal’. Other people might read this and think it’s all perfectly valid.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
No More Magic
8,407 Words
By EdgelordDarksonickiller
Rainbow Dash is dead. As far as Twilight is concerned, this is her fault. There’s only one thing to do…
This is actually two stories in one, as the “second chapter” is really a complete rewrite of the first. I did my duty and read both, and the first thing I’ll note is that our author should have moved the rewrite to be Chapter 1 (yes, you can do that). I can see why the first story got such a negative reception, and the whole still will get that negativity as long as the original is the first thing any reader sees.
The two stories offer up entirely different circumstances behind Rainbow’s death. Both involve Twilight performing magic experiments on plants with Rainbow watching, but one involves an aging spell and the other a growth spell. Doesn’t Zecora have a potion to achieve that second one already? I might be mis-remembering an earlier episode.
It doesn’t take much imagination to figure out how the aging spell could have killed Rainbow Dash. The growth spell, on the other hand? It’s cartoony. Heck, I’d call it downright dumb. Twilight basically made a Piranha Plant, and yes, it makes as little sense in-story as it does here. Less even, because the circumstances of this Piranha Plant appearing doesn’t have anything whatsoever to do with the magic Twilight was using. It just happens. Honestly, I have zero idea what prompted the author to do this farcical about-face. Rainbow’s original method of death was far more believable and tragic.
But even with that nonsensical change, I have to say that the second story is vastly better than the original. It’s an improvement in almost every other way. Such a pity that most people will read the original instead of the rewrite and probably stop reading entirely without ever seeing the improved version. The scenes and character behavior make more sense all around, the bits of worldbuilding surrounding Rainbow’s funeral are more interesting, and the ending is mostly an improvement. I say “mostly” because Twilight comes to the same OOC conclusion in both endings, and the way her friends talk her out of it in the rewrite felt tacked on, as if the author didn’t really believe in it and was just trying to satisfy naysayers.
I’m also wondering where the heck Celestia and Luna are. I mean, ignore the fact that Rainbow Dash is a national hero; Celestia’s beloved student is in intense emotional pain, and Rainbow helped save Luna from the Nightmare. That neither of them are present for at least the funeral in both versions is damning.
Overall, the rewrite isn’t a bad story, even if the ending felt like a lie and the method of Rainbow’s death is farcical. It’s got better pacing, better character behavior on the whole, and better control of the atmosphere, even if the emotions sometimes drifted into melodramatic territory. I encourage keeping the original version so that the author can recall their past mistakes, but I’d also recommend flipping the order of the stories around so prospective readers see the rewrite first.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
The Kissing Booth
4,279 Words
By CategoricalGrant
Pinkie Pie runs a charity every year to get birthday cakes to orphans. This year’s idea: a kissing booth. She asks all her friends to take part, but only Rarity agrees. Now the day has come, but the stallions are behaving awfully strangely…
This went both exactly how I anticipated and… not at all how I anticipated. If you’re paying any attention at all to the cover art, you’ll know that the story centers around all the stallions not wanting to kiss Rarity. The big question mark of the whole event is why? The answer ended up being some real OOC behavior that I don’t approve of. Oh, not that the culprit wouldn’t resort to trickery and shenanigans, but the specifics of those tricks and shenanigans.
That being said, I absolutely loved Starlight’s reaction in the final scene.
This is almost good enough to make you feel like you’re watching an unreleased episode. I say ‘almost’, because again, the over-the-top revelation at the end doesn’t feel like something that the responsible party would do. The show’s been known to stretch things on occasion, but not like this. This was just cruel.
If you want to watch Rarity struggling with her ego and self-esteem to the point of torture, this will probably do it for you. Bear in mind that it’s all played for a laugh.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
The Beach Kinda Sucks without You
7,058 Words
By elPossenreisser
The Mane 6 and Spike are all on vacation at a beachside resort! Well, most of the Mane 6; Princess Twilight is stuck in a hotel across the bay having diplomatic talks with the sea ponies. It’s keeping her so busy that she has no chance to be with the others. For Rainbow, this situation is crummy.
This is a story with some curious timing. You’d think, given the tags and description, that Rainbow and Twilight are already dating or that Rainbow wants to use the romantic beach setting to ask Twilight on a date. This is, after all, standard shipping procedure. elPossenreissuer denies that procedure with the girls having already been on one date and Rainbow not sure if the date went as well for Twilight as it did for her, thereby creating the primary issue of the story. I loved this approach. It’s different but generates all the same anxiety and entertainment shippers adore.
The author didn’t settle for just that, though, grabbing even more options from the shipper’s toolbox. The rest of the Mane 6 are decently, if briefly, represented, but none more so than Applejack and Rarity. Applejack was great because she alone knew what was bothering Rainbow and spent the entire story being a merciless tease about it; Rarity was great because she knew something was going on with Rainbow but was unaware of just what that something was, and it was driving her crazy. Both provided plenty of entertainment on their own.
Then we get to the third chapter, where Rainbow proves to be surprisingly smooth in her delivery. At the same time, I loved the constant back-and-forth of her, via the narrative, adamantly denying things like being scared or embarrassed because, you know, Rainbow’s totally cool and these are things Rainbow absolutely would never be in a million years so shut up. I always like when writers do that kind of thing with the narrative, it makes the whole story more fun for me.
Overall, this is a great vanilla ship fic, especially for TwiDash fans. If you’ve got a single shipping bone in your body, give it a go.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
Golden/Silver Shine
2,413 Words
By Regidar
Silver Spoon hates math. So she’s relieved when a distraction comes along in the form of Twist trying to get her to pass a note to Apple Bloom.
Regidar is one of those authors who would never write a direct story, instead preferring subtext, metaphor, and scene to deliver a message. This one may be the most direct I’ve read by this author, which still isn’t very direct. The story comes in two parts: first, Twist’s note and what Silver Spoon decides to do with it. Second, the opportunity and act of Silver Spoon stealing a vinyl record from the CMC clubhouse and listening to it.
These two things seem completely unrelated to one another, and on the surface you’d be right. In one, she unintentionally commits a good deed. In another, she hears a song that feels like it’s reprimanding her. These two events work together to enhance Silver Spoon’s growing awareness of her choices in life, particularly in terms of her relation to Diamond Tiara.
The song is curious to me. It strikes me as very familiar, and I’m confident Regidar used a real world song but changed the lyrics to keep to FIMfiction’s rules regarding such things. I just can’t place the song. Which is mildly frustrating.
At any rate, this was a nice bit of safic about Tied-For-Best Filly. I dare say it’s my favorite Regidar story so far, though that may be because it doesn’t confuse me nearly as much as so many of this author’s stories tend to do. It takes what we knew of Silver Spoon at the time (during the Great Hiatus between seasons 3 and 4) and expands upon it, which is what any good author should do with characters we don’t know so much about. The only major catch is that the story could use a proofreader.
If you’ve an interest in exploring the background of a character who tends to get stuck in the background even in fanfiction, try this out.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Ice Paved Trees — Worth It
The Last Petals Of Our Lives — Worth It
Time — Needs Work
Skyward Yearning
1,422 Words
By SPark
As the dragon migration passes over Ponyville a second time, a much older Spike watches with his niece.
This is a quiet story in which Spike teaches Twilight’s daughter about how to address life’s problems. It’s a cute story between niece and uncle and a great showing of how Spike has matured over the decades. I enjoyed the lesson, one that I feel a lot of people need in this day and age, but practically none will take to heart.
There’s not much else to say. The story’s writing is fine, and it does everything it intended to do in its short word count. The one and only caveat in all this is that it was written before Spike got wings and assumes he never will. Which is fine as long as you can accept when it was written.
If you’re looking for a story that takes Spike seriously, here’s a good one.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Over a Cardboard Sea — WHYRTY?
First and Last — Worth It
Immortal Blood — Worth It
Imperfect — Worth It
Forsaken Shores
4,596 Words
By garatheauthor
Requested by Cynewulf
Rarity is a wealthy merchant of the forest-inhabiting Elves. Today, she has joined a team of diplomats to meet the Equestrian monarchy. She knows, better than any of her peers, that this meeting will mean the end of her people. All she can hope for is to mitigate the damage.
This story reimagines the world of MLP in a huge way. Equestria, defeated by Sombra long ago, now lives only as a flotilla of warships, which wander the open seas in search of resources to grow stronger and someday take back their homeland, while at the same time avoiding the hunting presence of Sombra’s forces. The fleet is ruled by the last surviving monarchs, Cadence and Shining Armor, and where they go, destruction is left in their wake.
Sound bleak? That’s because it is. Very much so. This is an Equestria stipped of its pride and forced to perform acts of cruelty on others just to survive. We get to see a Shining Armor and Princess Cadance torn down from their formerly happy lives and made into something lesser by circumstances and an endless drive to stave off the destruction of their people, even at the cost of their souls.
The sheer worldbuilding potential in this story cannot be overstated. Such a shame that we’ll almost certainly never see that potential reach its natural end. This is a mere window into a world ripe for exploring, and it only exists because it was commissioned. In the world of literature, it’s a crime of the highest order.
With interesting characters, a pitch-perfect Rarity who says much while saying little, effective use of shock, and an ever-oppressive atmosphere, this story is a delight (so to speak). The possibilities alone are enough to keep me interested. It’s only flaw is not continuing, a sin so great it prevents me from granting this story my highest rating.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
Seconds Late
54,640 Words
By FerociousCreation
Requested by FerociousCreation
Perfectionist student and musician Alto is determined to ask his foalhood friend, Harp Hearts, to the upcoming school dance. You can imagine his frustration when she is instead asked by the most desirable bachelor in the school, High Brass, right before he can. But things get far worse than that, because High Brass stole his date on purpose.
This is a teenage drama centered entirely on Alto and his warring desires to be with Harp Hearts or let her be happy with serial-mare-stealer High Brass. Alto proves himself to be just about the best stallion there is by choosing that second option, no matter how much it hurts. While the concept appears straightforward, it is benefited significantly by strong, complex characters. FerociousCreation didn’t just create some common high school characters and plop them down to go through tired motions, instead bothering to give them backgrounds, morals, and motivations. In the end, the ultimate conflict isn’t about underdog white knights fighting against asshole, girlfriend-stealing bullies, but instead about ponies with good intentions being at odds with one another over how to enact those intentions.
Overall, I loved this approach. While some parts are certainly predictable, it all felt just original enough to hold my interest throughout. There’s also the interference of a third party that was more than a little surprising, and I have to wonder what their overarching interests are in these developments.
One thing that kept coming to me was this feeling throughout that changelings were involved. This theory came partially because of Alto’s regular claim that he was getting headaches over all his emotional woes. The timing and frequency of those headaches bugged me, and they felt outright forced, which led me to believe there had to be some other cause. Nowhere was this sounding out louder red flags for me than when Alto had his, er, ‘conversation’ with Spearmint. Going by those events and her own words, I strongly suspected she was a changeling – and hey, the story never did confirm or deny it.
The story is, all around, a strong one. It lays down the idea that nobody is exactly evil so much as layers of grey, and floats the concept that everyone, even the villains, consider themselves the hero of their own story.
The big flaw here is in the writing. FerociousCreation needs a proofreader. Desperately. The writing was loaded with mistakes from beginning to end, including homophones, missing words, or words repeated in awkward ways. That last one in particular is frequent. For example:
A supportive hoof grabbed Bastion’s own hoof and grabbed on.
Couple that with words being used that don’t mean what FerociousCreation intended, questionable comma usage, and an overly direct narration. The writing of this story leaves a lot to be desired. It’s a testament to the strength of the story by itself that I was able to enjoy it enough to not mind as much as I normally would.
Not a bad showing, but the author will need to seriously up their game in terms of how they write their stories.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Just Some Flowers — Pretty Good
The Worst of All Possible Worlds
422,724 Words
By TheTimeSword
Sunset Shimmer’s journal that lets her contact Twilight has run out of pages, so she takes the opportunity to head to Equestria and get a new one. But in this version of events, she makes the journey right when Starlight Glimmer is creating the alternate timelines. Suddenly Sunset herself is stuck in one of the new timelines, trapped and with no idea how to get home.
This is exactly what you think it is. Sunset Shimmer goes through each of the alternate worlds created by Starlight Glimmer, facing new challenges and goals and lessons in each one. It would be easy to suspect that this is just the same story on repeat for every world; find the Elements of Harmony, stop the Bad Guy, move to the next timeline. Fortunately, TheTimeSword has greater vision than that.
Every new timeline brings with it something different. In one, yes, it’s just a matter of finding the Mane 6 and stopping the Bad Guy. In another, it’s becoming the Bad Guy’s apprentice and learning from their mistakes. In yet a third, it’s about making the world’s problems worse (to be grievously brief). And while the Mane 6 do feature in most of them, TheTimeSword goes out of their way to make sure we know that these aren’t the mares we know and love. Heck, in a few instances they even become Sunset’s enemies.
One of the best things about this story is the thoroughness of the changes. TheTimeSword completely recreates Equestria with every new timeline. And while it’s true that this was necessary because of the nature of the story, I feel like the author did a great job implementing it. They don’t just take what the show gave them, they expand upon it and make it their own, sometimes in surprising ways. Truly, it’s a great aspect to the overarching story.
There were one or two annoyances. In some worlds the whole friendship thing was just too easy. Like in one where Sunset goes rounding up the Mane 6, who are drastically different and even, arguably, opposites of their given Elements. Sunset keeps thinking and claiming they are friends and all they’ll need to do is get their physical Elements and everything will be hunky dorey. I’m sitting here thinking “this is going to go fantastically wrong because they aren’t representing their Elements and they clearly aren’t friends”. And yet, somehow, for no real reason, it all works. And I’m just like… how?
I theorize that the author may have started to develop some story fatigue towards the end. The scenario I just described does happen, and it could work, but it felt like TheTimeSword was hurrying through the events compared to previous stories. This perceived haste (despite how long the world’s arc was) played a big part in why it all came out so unbelievable to me. I got the impression TheTimeSword ws tired of taking the time to let us adapt to and grasp the “new” Mane 6 and their friendships and just wanted to get to the ending.
Which, y’know, I can get that. This was an ambitious project. Maybe too ambitious.
At any rate, I enjoyed the story on the whole. It’s fun, with fascinating worldbuilding going for most of the timelines. My favorite world was Nightmare’s Night, thanks to TheTimeSword spending so much time exploring the concept of a world ruled by Nightmare Moon. Most of the other worlds got at least a little bit of that treatment, but it seems to me that this is the one that TheTimeSword devoted the most attention to. That said, I can see why, from an author’s perspective, TheTimeSword favors Tirek’s timeline. The Discord world was no slouch, either. Not much of the worldbuilding in the Sombra and Chrysalis worlds, but there are good reasons for that.
The story has its ups and downs, like any big story, but overall it’s a fun, flowing, enjoyable adventure. I’m glad I took the time to go through with it. Not sure why the author felt the need to end it on a gag scene, but I’ll settle for it given how good the majority of the story is.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
Stories for Next Week:
Mortal by Benman
Operation: Replace by Thought Prism
One of Those Days by Taranth
The Simple Life by Thornwing
Mud, Sweat, and Tears by Hyperexponential
The Time Has Come by Commissar Rarity
Aftermath of the Games by Darth Link 22
Blank by GeekCat
The Train Ride by Snuffy
Sungaged by Summer Dancer
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As a fellow fan of the "Perfect Little Village" series, I feel obliged to note that it does in fact follow McPoodle's other stories starting with Javelin, even though for some reason it isn't tagged. So if you want some more info, that should help, and I'd look forward to seeing your take.
😔
The cards never play out during my Patreon polls.
I hear you on video games. Saw a trailer for Factorio, saw it had a free demo, and the second half of August vanished
That last one sounds real good. Good thing it was already on my RIL! :D
Thank you for your review. I actually am working on the last story in the series, although I can't tell you what year it will come out.
Also thanks for the last story, which is definitely going on my "read later" list, and not just because the title is the inverse of one of mine.
Seeing you say “needs a proofreader desperately” I laughed and nodded in agreement. My only Defence is that I’ve had one before but that was two years prior. It’s difficult to find one when you are a bit intimidated to ask for a proofreader and get flaked on again (and also that story was written three years ago and my writing has dramatically improved so I know I can go back and fix some... errors).
The “predictable outcomes” comment did cut a bit. After all, I wanted things to be surprising, but I can learn and have done so since the story’s publication.
I do appreciate the review and your enjoyment. Yes, the story is all about gray areas and how motivation is inspired by what I call “the damn question,” why. Knowing or learning why gives perspective. Personally, when I grew up watching cartoons, I’ve seen villains mostly behave like the bad guys because they are or want to be. I want to know WHY they chose their path. It can make you somewhat sympathize with someone you never thought you would, even if you disagree in the end.
As for the headaches, it was more on my experience with frustrated headaches I’ve had when dealing with something similar to our protagonist Alto. Not to say what I dealt with was similar, but seeing them, knowing you were too late brings quite the headache.
If there is any story I want to do a retelling, it would be this one. That is why I wanted you to review it. Genuinely, thank you.
5347901
Oh? And here I was all disappointed. Thanks for the heads up!
5347986
A shame you have to rely on Patreon polls to decide what to write, but if that's how you gotta roll, that's how you gotta roll.
5348010
Ah, Factorio. Been playing the pre-release version(s) off and on for years now. Never beat it. Closest I came was last time, when I finally got far enough to make the rocket silo. Then I saw how much the individual rocket parts cost to make and I was like "Nnnope." Next time I'll know and maybe will have my infrastructure ready to handle it.
5348143
It may not make much of a difference, but you never know. If people ever notice it like I did, perhaps it'll matter.
5348269
Can't say for sure. It's not uncommon for me to put a story in my RiL months or even a year or two before I get around to reading it. At this point, there's no telling how it caught my eye.
You have no idea. Literally the Twilight section of World 5 was me wanting to write something else, somewhere else, with Sunset. Luckily, the creation of World 6 was long enough apart in my writing that I was able to come back with a renewed presence, and it turned out more decent.
Would you believe I'm going to begin the ambitious project once again relatively soon? Funnily, it's been over a year since The Worst of All Possible Worlds ended, yet I've recently gone back to update its style to my current format. (Using em dashes, removing dangling modifiers, keeping things relatively neat for reading purposes.)
Once I've finished the style shift, I'll actually be adding three chapters to TWoAPW. Of course, they're not relating directly to Sunset's journey, so not reading them has no consequences. But they're a prelude to something bigger.
5349068
Oh, I do have an idea. I'm nothing if not ambitious, and it has bitten me in the butt on at least two occasions (not counting my non-FIMFiction work).
If you're adding three new chapters that aren't at all related to Sunset's work in the main story, would it not be better to release them as an entirely separate side story so that they don't detract from what is already a ridiculously long story? I can understand wanting to tie in other events for a later piece, but if they're not smoothly included in the ongoing events then I doubt they'd be beneficial to TWoaPW itself.
5349074
Though they're not part of the Sunset journey, it involves actions caused by her, and some characters. It will take place in a new world not seen in the original story. The reason I'm keeping it together rather than separating it as a new fic is that it's an example and a questionnaire.
Once it's posted, it'll include a poll for readers to fill out if they so choose. If a sequel were to take place, would it be okay to go beyond the seven worlds we saw? Would people be interested in a different protagonist(s) other than Sunset Shimmer? How would a more world focused story be received? Things of that nature—and putting these three chapters into their own story wouldn't get the eyes I need to make a decision on what to do next.
5349087
I still think it's a really bad idea to tack it onto the back of TWoaPW instead of making it its own story. I guarantee I would have docked you for it in the review significantly had I seen it. At best, it'll severely detract from the satisfaction and mood of the conclusion (although you sorta did that already by making a joke ending, so...)
Well I was hoping to forget out No More Magic forever but thanks for reminding me how bad it is again. Not sure how I made it on your review list but I really wish I hadn't.
5349509
No worries! You've got plenty of chances to redeem yourself, as your library shows.
5349517
I did not know I could do that! Well now that fixes everything. No More Magic, No More Comments, No More Ratings!
Wait a second.....I can disable comments and ratings???