Trixie Update: Slow going, but here's a DELETED SCENE · 2:13am Jul 20th, 2020
So. I write about 2-3k words a day.
Then, I delete about 90% of the last day's writing, and start again.
Plus side: The story is coming along well. It's nice and lean, like I like it.
Downside: It's slow. Very slow.
Continental.
But, in other news, I've actually gone back and cleaned up Chapter 1 so that it isn't a super pain in the flank to read!
Yay! Right?
Yeah, you guys deserve something more for getting through this rambling bit. So, consider the following a peak into an alternate universe where I forgot how to pace a story. None of this is canon to The Legend of Trixie, but I thought it was too amusing to disappear forever.
Deleted Scene
Below, the creature within the crater stirred. With a groan as terrible as that of icebergs grinding up against each other, Grogar slowly lifted himself out of the hole he’d made.
He was as ancient as he was malevolent, that old ram. His horns were broad, if knotted and scarred, and patches of silver hair made up almost half of his dark blue coat.
But it was Grogar’s baleful, scowling eyes which caused Twilight to take a step backward. Her stomach churned to be in the presence of such wickedness. Such vile hatred for all that was Pony…
“Good evening, Princess Twilight,” his fell voice growled out in evil politeness, “It is certainly a lovely night, is it not?”
“Grogar,” Princess Twilight narrowed her eyes at the ram, “What are you doing here?”
He shrugged, in a menacing way only a millennia-old monster could.
“I heard, as did all in this hamlet, that the Great and Powerful Trixie Lulamoon had fallen ill, and may pass on.”
The Princess’s heart skipped.
“Is it that… is it that bad?” she asked, tightening her chest and throat against what might come next.
Again, Grogar shrugged.
“I know not. I merely came to offer my condolences, and my respect, to my greatest rival.”
Twilight sighed, relieved. She could put that fear down, if only for a few more minutes.
“Well, judging by how Starswirl launched you from the window,” she said, tilting her head to one side, “I’m guessing your greatest rival’s restraining order still stands?”
Grogar opened his mouth, a grim retort no doubt prepared for his verbal spar with Equestrian royalty… but said nothing. He closed his mouth, and raised his eyebrows high up his forehead.
His expression was nebulous, and unreadable.
For about five seconds, before a terrifying grin cut across his face, and Grogar began to laugh.
“You…” he chortled and guffawed in a voice that felt like grinding tomb doors, “You actually think that… that the boy was my rival!?”
He laughed. And he laughed. And he laughed some more. His howling laughter caused the clouds in the sky to shiver, and the grass at the edge of the pavement to blacken.
And amidst his dark merriment, Twilight could only sigh, exasperated.
“Trixie is your… Greatest Rival?”
“Of course, she is!” he shook his head in dismay, “Why would I rival that whelp, Swirly, when the only foe I ever faced on my own terms was his master?”
Twilight pressed the bridge of her nose with a hoof. “… I don’t know what I was thinking…”
Cheers!
I love deleted scenes; it shows just how much fun we could have if we cut ties with silly notions like coherence and logic.
And this one I love a lot.
It will be canon in my heart.
That was awesome!
5316010
Thank you!
5315947
I probably could’ve written one and a half full chapters by this point, if I just gave up and used the first draft. I might as well preserve some of that hot mess for future generations.
5316050
I once included deleted scenes of one of my chapters because they would derail the tone of it and my readers wanted them to be canon XD
Now I now your secret for such high quality storytelling
I hope you find some other way to work this revelation into canon. Not this scene per se, but just Twilight finding out Grogar considers Trixie his greatest rival.
5316058
I’ll be sure to post more of my silly mistakes more often then!
5316115
Oh... there are plans in motion. Never you fear...
Interesting. ^^
5316168
In what way, specifically?
5316235
It’s well written and I can picture the scene.
Silly Twilight. I'm not sure what you expected at this point.
A thought popped into my head, but what if Trixie was one of the First users of the elements, if not THE FIRST user, and thats what has taken a toll on her body?