Friendship is Forever Card Games: Deep Tissue Memories · 11:46am Jul 12th, 2020
Just because I’ve found Pony Life deeper than expected doesn’t mean I’m going to put other media aside. I’m absolutely finishing off Friendship is Forever, and I just started that manga storyline. We have a triple rotation for the next few months, and next up is the Rainbow Dash clip show.
Out of all the framing devices for this one, I wasn’t expecting a callback to Dash at the spa from “Applejack’s ‘Day’ Off.”
The Lotus sisters’ accent is just… I don’t even know. Especially since it’s not clear where in the wider world their homeland would even be. The closest thing we have to Europe is Griffonstone.
I’d half-expect the Wonderbolts to have an onsite spa. We definitely saw them getting massages in “Rainbow Falls,” to say nothing of the locker room backrubs. Still, I can’t say I’m surprised that Dash would choose to support Ponyville businesses.
“So, when do you think you first realized just how athletic I was?”
The most brilliant part of this is that’s entirely in character for Dash to ask for an ego stroke out of the blue. 
Ah, our first encounter with Dash… and she isn’t looking where she’s going, crashes into something, and makes a mess… which she then fixes. More or less, given how she overdoes it. Really sets the tone for the character in general. Also our first introduction to pegasus weather magic.
Also, the origin of .
And the first mention of the Wonderbolts… who, come to think of it, never show up in “Firiendship is Magic.” Still this was the first point on Dash’s first personal plot arc, back when it just seemed like a pipe dream.
You know, for a pony who disdained social contact with pretty much anyone who wasn’t Celestia, Twilight was surprisingly manipulative back in the day.
Aw, they don’t actually show Dash clearing the sky in literally ten seconds flat.
“I’ve been a sporty pony my whooole life.”
Eerily true on a metafictional level. After all, those were the first moments Dash existed from our viewpoint.
“So I have to come to the spa because… sports.”
Flawless deception, Dash. She’ll never suspect a thing.
I do appreciate how we go from Dash declaring her intent to become a Wonderbolt to her casually mentioning practice with them. That’s the fun part of hopping around the timeline.
“So… Applejack and Rarity told you about that, huh?”
Nice way to justify including a clip without Twilight. Though I can’t imagine Dash is happy it will end up in the memory album.
I have to love them slipping in “Why are you stealing slippers?” out of context. To say nothing of Screw Loose.
“I knew the book was good, but I didn’t know it could drive a pony to petty theft.”
I mean, it’s Daring Do. Technically speaking, she’s been stealing from other cultures her whole career. 
You know, you have to admire the time and effort that went into painting all of those apples in the prank montage… though it does raise the question of how long Applejack was in the barn.
Heh. The hard life of a Dimir operative. “You haven’t met your quota. Get back in there and extract more memories.”
I knew it was coming, and Dash shouting in Twilight’s ear still made me flinch. Also, that is a gorgeous decompression pool.
Lovely demonstration of the pony-duck phenomenon.
Ah, Gilda. The fandom’s first truly divisive character. (Yes, including Trixie. “Griffon the Brush-Off” aired just before “Boast Busters.”)
And Winter Wrap-Up… and a demonstration of how Ponyville tradition really is just a matter of “screw the pinheads.” No magic, my eye...
Dash, kicking a fully grown dragon in the face wasn’t you being awesome, it was you being an idiot.
I’m impressed by Twilight here. Rather than just shutting Dash down, she steers her towards something that will work for the both of them. I shouldn’t be surprised by this behavior from the fully realized Princess of Friendship, but it’s still good to see.
This may be Rainbow Dash’s clipshow, but “Your winter is going to be… petless” is one of Fluttershy’s finer moments. Sometimes kindness comes in the form of tough love.
And, of course, they couldn’t do a Dash clipshow without the titular maneuver from “Sonic Rainboom.” Fun fact: Rarity’s Icarus moment was the very first bit of pony I ever saw, aside from some Rainbow Dash reaction macros. At the time, I thought she was a one-off antagonist.
Fluttershy’s cheer highlights one of Andrea Libman’s greatest challenges in the series, one that continues in Pony Life: Making excited Fluttershy sound distinct from Pinkie Pie.
Huh. I think this may be the first time we’ve seen massage tables with holes for faces at the Ponyville Spa.
Oh dear, the “Newbie Dash” performance. I’d kind of hoped we could forget this one.
On the other hand, it does reraise the question of the cloud bone, for which I’ve never gotten a satisfactory answer.
Pinkie’s cotton candy overload is another great out-of-context moment… though I still feel sorry for that stallion.
Ah, the other pranking montage. The Gotcha Polka is definitely up there in terms of Dash’s more obnoxious moments.
Best Pony made it into Friendship is Forever. I am pleased. And what better episode than “Rainbow Falls.” That was her triumphant return after a controversy-induced absence, after all.
Mind you, it’s hardly a good episode for the Wonderbolts. Still, Dash did go on to whip the outfit into what she always believed it should be.
And obligatory Trial of Loyalty clip. “The greatest aerial team in the Everfree Forest” is still a hilariously narrow superlative. Also, I have to think that the Shadowbolts would’ve been bat ponies if the Flash models were available/the team had thought of them. (Or, more diegetically, perhaps Nightmare Moon deliberately choose forms that Dash would be more comfortable with.)
The magic glare that covers the canyon in muffling fog is an impressive bit of hybrid unicorn-pegasus magic. And we see similar displays from Luna later in the series. Consider the dramatic thunderclaps from “Luna Eclipsed.” And the shapeshifting as well.
And Dash as masseuse. Pretty clear that’s where it was going, but her capabilities there… actually make sense. Again, we’ve seen the ‘Bolts provide each other with rubdowns in the locker room. Much like how everypony gets a round of KP duty, presumably they all get some sports medicine training.
I can definitely see how Dash would cherish Twilight’s first flying lessons. One of her groundbound friends got to join her in the sky. How could she not love that?
“You’ve already given up wearing your crown all the time.”
Okay, “Princess Twilight Sparkle” was the very first episode to get an FiCG article. Back then, I thought the analysis part of things was so oversaturated that I should just limit myself to card designs. As such, I’ve never commented on this: I’m pretty sure this locked in Equestria Girls as canon. After all, what better reason to stop wearing the Tiara of Magic on a constant basis than Sunset demonstrating the inherent security risk?
I do love the plane noises that come with flailing flying ponies.
“2, 4, 6, Greaaat.” An episode I’d be happy to forget entirely. Especially since the clipshow showed clips from the same episode as Dash telling Fluttershy the elements of a good cheer. 
Still, a good cross-section of Dash through the years: Confident, capable, brash, and more caring than she’ll ever admit in a public setting.
Now, let’s see how I can translate that awesomeness to collectible cardboard:
Whirlwind Disorientation W
Instant
Tap target creature. Destroy up to one target permanent attached to that creature.
Rainbow Dash leaves most ponies’ heads spinning one way or another.
Pampered Performer 1W
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Pampered Performer can’t attack unless it’s enchanted or equipped.
“I’ll be up there soon, pal. I look this good because I never skip the preflight checks.”
2/2
Challenge Seeker 1WW
Creature — Griffin Warrior
Flying, first strike
When Challenge Seeker enters the battlefield, target opponent distributes a flying counter and a first strike counter among up to two creatures they control.
She wants to meet her match.
4/3
Solar Purge 3WW
Sorcery
Exile all artifacts and enchantments with converted mana cost equal to or less than your devotion to white. Destroy all other artifacts and enchantments. (Each W in the mana costs of permanents you control counts towards your devotion to white.)
Decompress 2U
Sorcery
Draw three cards. You skip your next draw step.
“I’ve never found it easy to turn off my brain. But I’ve almost aways found it helpful.”
—Princess Twilight Sparkle
Disappearing Notes 2U
Instant
Counter target noncreature spell. Its controller mills cards equal to that spell’s converted mana cost. (They put that many cards from the top of their library into their graveyard.)
“And whatever you do, don’t”
—Alchemist’s journal, final entry
Downpour Specialist 3U
Creature — Pegasus Wizard
Creatures attacking you or planeswalkers you control get -1/-0.
Pegasus weather magic makes any prolonged war against Equestria a miserable prospect.
2/3
Memory Dowser 4UU
Creature — Unicorn Ninja
Ninjutsu 3U
Whenever Memory Dowser deals combat damage to a player, you may cast target instant or sorcery card from that player’s graveyard without paying its mana cost. If that spell would be put into that graveyard this turn, exile it instead.
3/2
Incorrigible Prankster 2B
Creature — Pegasus Rogue
Flash
Flying
Whenever you cast another spell that has flash, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
“So stop incorriging me!”
1/3
Shadowbolt Recruiter 2BB
Creature — Nightmare Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Whenever Shadowbolt Recruiter attacks, you may pay XB. When you do, return target creature card with converted mana cost X or less from a graveyard to the battlefield under your control, tapped, and attacking. Exile that creature at end of combat.
3/2
Divided Loyalties 1R
Sorcery
Exchange control of two target creatures with different controllers until end of turn. If you gain control of a creature this way, untap it and it gains haste until end of turn.
Nothing gets under a hero’s skin like having to choose between equally righteous causes.
Lair Raid 1R
Instant
Target creature you control fights target creature you don’t control. If a Dragon fought this way, create two Treasure tokens. (They’re artifacts with “T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.”)
Sometimes you get the loot, and sometimes the loot gets you.
Mudslammer 2R
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Mudslammer can’t block.
When Mudslammer enters the battlefield, choose up to one target creature you don’t control. Mudslammer gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is your devotion to red, then you may have it fight that creature.
2/1
The Second Rainboom 2R
Enchantment — Saga
(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.)
I, II — Target creature you control gets +2/+0 until the end of the turn The Second Rainboom leaves the battlefield.
III — Target creature you control deals damage equal to its power to each creature and planeswalker you don’t control.
Mythos of Rainbow Dash 3R
Sorcery
Search your hand and, if BG was spent to cast this spell, your graveyard and library for a creature card and put it onto the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step. If you searched your library this way, shuffle it.
Panicked Flailing 3R
Sorcery
Choose a creature an opponent controls that doesn’t have lethal damage marked on it at random. Panicked Flailing deals 4 damage to that creature. Repeat this process for each creature you control with power 4 or greater.
“Thought I saw a wasp.”
—Dragonlord Torch
Unscheduled Adjustment 3R
Instant
Split second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can’t cast spells or activate abilities that aren’y mana abilities.)
You may choose new targets for target spell.
To make Discord laugh, make a plan.
Blatant Lies XR
Instant
Manifest the top X cards of your library. At the beginning of the next end step, put those permanents on top of your library, then shuffle it. (To manifest a card, put it onto the battlefield face down as a 2/2 creature. Turn it face up any time for its mana cost if it's a creature card.)
Medical Release G
Instant
Target creature gains indestructible until end of turn. Remove all -1/-1 counters from it.
Pegasi show a greater degree of caution once out of the hospital, one that generally lasts for all of a day.
Everfree Fog Bank 3G
Creature — Elemental
Flash
Defender, reach
Everfree Fog Bank can block any number of creatures.
When Everfree Fog Bank enters the battlefield, prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to it this turn.
0/6
Epic Moment 1RG
Instant
Until the end of your next turn, spells you cast can’t be countered, creatures you control gain indestructible and hexproof, and damage that would be dealt by sources you control can’t be prevented.
The truly awesome let nothing stop them.
Hospital Raider 1RW
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying, haste, lifelink
“Just gonna borrow some bandages real quick pay you later thanks bye!”
2/1
Massive Slipstream 3GWU
Instant
Tap all permanents your opponents control and untap all permanents you control.
Enough pegasi working together are literally a force of nature.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Blatant Lies doesn't give anything haste, so casting it on your turn won't normally give you any attackers. Oh, and using the nature of manifest (or actual morph abilities, which will still work) to turn cards face-up doesn't change what permanents they are, so that won't save them from the delayed triggered ability; your lies will catch up to you.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Anything with more -1/-1 counters than toughness will die before anything can be cast to save it, and being indestructible won't help either. I'd say "shouldn't have gotten in the way of that colossus" but something had to; that thing can potentially one-shot through a blocker, never mind without one (11 power and trample, with 10 damage being lethal; a 1/1 token won't even save you on its own).
Inside Baseball Alert: Everfree Fog Bank is of course Fog as a creature. Oddly enough, though, there's a precedent for it in blue.
Inside Baseball Alert: This is just amusing trivia based on the fact that Mythos of Rainbow Dash uses black and green to respectively access the graveyard and library, but those colors' roles are reversed in regard to sending arbitrary things to the hand. Specify creatures, though, and it still works the way Dash does it. Just a bit of pie silliness (not Pie silliness; she may have created Ungula but she didn't create Dominia, and she's a G3 import instead of G1 so it does in fact predate her).
Balancing Dash's ego with her heroism always felt like a delicate balancing act.
At least going by the architecture, I'd say Ponyville is pretty European (plus the monarchy's castle isn't too far away). Maybe Lotus and Aloe's accents are more of a regional thing.
I had to look up whether they even have barracks (they do). But I guess Rainbow would rather live at home and is fast enough that she doesn't mind the commute.
I liked how Rainbow dipped her head into the pool to hide the fact that she was crying.
So Starlight and Spike were hiding in the pool the whole time? How opaque was that water? And how did Spike hear what Twilight said as she left the room while he was still underwater?
In the five seconds the camera was focused on Spike, Starlight dried and restyled her mane. I'd call it a continuity error, but she probably knows a spell for that.
I guess we were supposed to think that Lotus was the one giving Twilight a massage, but I assume we all figured out that twist from the get-go.
I'm no physiologist, but I'm going to assume it's related to inherent pegasus magic (similarly to how only unicorns have horns).
I enjoyed the writing in that scene: "Even with Rainbow Dash's replacement." You're not going to let us say her name? We're still keeping her in the series!
I appreciated the animation of Twilight during her out-of-control loops. She instinctively tries to run with her legs.
This shipping is going a bit too far now!
I still don't get why Twilight Sparkle would even want to move back to Canterlot at all though. It's just wrong and it makes it like the events of the show never happened. :/
Plus..... it wastes her hard earned castle that she gained in the 2nd part of the Season 4 finale for goodness sake! >:/
I love the mechanics of Challenge Seeker and the flavour text on Incorrigible Prankster. Mythos of Rainbow Dash is excellently flavourful and a great R / BRG-kicked design (and I like HoO's pie observations on it too).
I think Blatant Lies has the Waylay problem, doesn't it? Was it intended to be usable as a White Sun's Zenith for one attack step? I guess WSZ shows it's not super-overtuned even if I do do it in your end step.
This is how it went in my head:
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On the other hand, would you prefer to see Ponyville become a second Canterlot, ossifying into memorials, governmental seats, and ponies with their snoots in the air?
Not disagreeing that the ending could have used some polish, just noting.
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Put it this way: There was nothing that Twilight wanted to go back to living in Canterlot at the end of the series. I mean, well, Princess Celestia made her leave Canterlot at the beginning of the series to get her out of her studies and of course.... for of the theme of the show..... making some friends, of which she was able to do so over the course of the series prior to Season 9. :/
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"Student Overtakes The Master" was in the big book of cliche endings for dinguses the writers ate for breakfast on the season nine planning session.
It's not an awful move, though I think they could have done more to develop it than an episode about swans.
Lair Raid and Solar Purge are my favorites out of this bunch. Panicked Flailing gets an honorable mention.
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Oh, that reminds me:
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: As long as one or both creatures is a Dragon, you get the treasure. Even if it's your dragon effortlessly eating some random dude.
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It's just... it was far too late to use one of Lauren Faust's original visions in the show even after Lauren Faust left it.
Unless...... What if the royal sisters we saw throughout of Season 9 were in fact fakes and the real ones were kidnapped, thus the fakers ended up tricking Twilight and her friends saying they were going to retire from ruling and pass it down to Twilight Sparkle only? In my opinion, the real Celestia and Luna would never want that at all, especially the latter given her whole Nightmare Moon stint.