Story Notes: 16 (Lily Blossom) · 2:31am Jun 18th, 2020
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/1109892
We've seen Lily before, way back in Diamond Rose's chapter. And now we get to see how the other half of this duo thinks. Abbott & Costello, Sonny & Cher, Martin & Lewis, Laurel & Hardy, Fontanne & Lunt, Rita & Runt, and Diamond & Lily. Lily has the misfortune of being the straight mare in this comedic duo, and if I'm going to continue with Animaniacs references, perhaps the more accurate comparison would be she's Buttons to Diamond Rose's Mindy. Diamond's always rushing off and it's up to Lily to make sure she doesn't kill herself or anypony else.
Writing the same scenes from two different vantage points is surprisingly difficult. The dialogue has to stay the same. Trying to keep it fresh instead of just repeating the earlier scenes is where the challenge comes in. Having a different internal perspective helps, but doesn't offset the fact that the dialogue and actions between the characters don't change. I wouldn't have retread this path if not for the fact that Lily Blossom and Diamond Rose have radically different ways of thinking.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/239944
I know I've used this image in previous blog posts, but I'm highlighting it here for a reason. In addition to showcasing Lily Blossom and last chapter's Honeybuzz, we're treated to Cherry Pie, Dewdrop Dazzle, and Diamond Rose.
My original goal was 4,000-5,000 words per chapter, which is why earlier chapters seem rushed. Or should I say, they seemed rushed. Since the last update (Honeybuzz), Cherry Pie's chapter has nearly doubled in length from 4,400 words to 8,000 words. Daisy Dreams, Dewdrop Dazzle, and Diamond Rose have also seen some additions to their chapters as well. Going back and re-reading these chapters isn't necessary, as their stories haven't changed. Rather, scenes have been added to help flesh out these characters a bit more, as opposed to just 'what brought them to Earth'? Aside from the bus, Bifröst. In other words, there's now more to see of Cherry Pie aside from her failed business venture, and Dewdrop's chapter now provides some insight as to what happened after they got off the bus (we'll be seeing more of that in Ploomette's chapter, she's up after our next mare, Lulu Luck).
Lily's chapter also marks the halfway point of the first act. I originally anticipated this story to run 150,000-200,000 words, total, throughout all three acts. We're almost 75,000 words into it and we're only halfway through the first act. This could break 300,000 words (more if we count Business Trip & Mr. Jones Goes To Equestria; and I'm still planning at least one sequel to this), a number I never would've anticipated. Business Trip was supposed to be a one-shot. As of this chapter, this is officially the longest story (of any type) I've ever written. It broke into Fimfiction's top 10,000 by length last chapter. There are only ~10,000 fics on this website to make it to 50,000 words, and now I account for two of them. Considering I tend to stick to shorter stories, I rank that as an accomplishment.
That leads me to some questions for all of you: who's your favorite pony of the eight we've seen so far? Cherry Pie, Daisy Dreams, Dewdrop Dazzle, Diamond Rose, Feathermay, Flitterheat, Honeybuzz, or Lily Blossom? Who has the best cutie mark story? And perhaps most importantly, who has the best reason for leaving Equestria behind?
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/1645496
LILY BLOSSOM is known for being graceful when she flies, but she is just as elegant on all four hooves!
Not counting the mishaps she had as a foal, Lily's graceful in the air. She just isn't fast. Grace and elegance, however, are a by-product of her upbringing. Tiger Lily wanted her daughter to fit in with the locals in Canterlot, so when Lily Blossom was learning to walk, Tiger made her learn how to walk properly. Once she got the hang of flying, her learned grace on the ground translated to her grace in the air. There's a reason she was able to snag a stallion from a well-off family... well, at least until Diamond Rose interfered.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/1480791
Diamond Rose is unintentionally a horrible pony, but she's slowly realizing that and trying hard to change. The problem is, she's very naïve and prone to saying/doing the wrong thing at the wrong time. Lily Blossom, on the other hoof, is a bitter pony. She's also been given a taste of the 'good life' and she's reluctant to leave it behind, even if it means continuing to deal with Diamond Rose. They've already started the process of fixing one another, even if neither of them knows it just yet.
Shiny Diamond could have been portrayed as an Ebenzer Scrooge/J. Paul Getty miser, but neither the fictional Scrooge nor the very real Getty strikes me as the kind of person to have staff for things they could do themselves. Getty was known for doing his own laundry, and despite being the richest person in America, would cut the frayed ends off shirt sleeves and keep wearing them. I can't see a character based on either of them hiring a live-in playmate for his daughter. Is Shiny Diamond perfect? Absolutely not. In addition to having completely bungled (and outsourced) his daughter's upbringing, let's just say there are a lot of very pretty mares on staff, including Lily Blossom's mother (Tiger Lily) and the cook (Keen Bean). You can draw your own conclusions from that: the fic has an 'E' rating.
But that's the thing: no one is completely evil, just as no one is completely good. One thing you won't see in my writing is a card-carrying villain doing things 'for the evils'. My antagonists have reasons for doing the things they do, but they're not necessary bad ponies. Likewise, my protagonists have their own flaws. It's what makes them interesting (not to mention more lifelike) characters. There's only one My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic character I see as 'wanting to watch the world burn' (and it isn't Cozy Glow).
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/1645488
I know I've previously mentioned I collect the MLP toys, and I can't describe how disappiointed I was when two of the above had their brushables canceled in favor of re-releasing the Mane 6 yet again. One of the two, Minty, aka Best Pony™, eventually managed to get some G4 love thanks to Costco and Build-A-Bear Workshop. But Sweetie Blue has languished in obscurity, with only a blind bag release. Had she been made as a brushable, she'd be in this story. What might have been:
As you can see, her overall design is similar to Mrs. Cake. And much like Cupcake (seen in an image below), Mrs. Cake replaced both of them in the toy line.
Lily Blossom is the oldest of our mares, edging out Diamond Rose (and Starbeam Twinkle) by a few months.
One thing I'm sure folks are curious about this chapter is what happened to Lily Blossom's father. Lily doesn't know, because her mom won't talk about it. One day he was there, and the next he wasn't. I'm leaving this one to everyone's imagination. Is he dead? Did he run off with another mare and abandon his family? Is he serving a prison sentence as a statue in the Canterlot Garden? I don't know. Tiger Lily won't tell me, either. Whatever the case may be, Lily Blossom hasn't seen him since she was four, and only has vague recollections of him. She could trot past him and wouldn't even recognize him.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/2177753
Mr. Tree?
I should be ashamed of myself. I really, really, should be.
But I'm not. If the next update runs late, assume it's because I'm the latest foo' to get pitied.
He also correctly guessed how to make Lily's mark blossom onto her previously blank flank. I mean, who expects a pony named Lily Blossom to get lilies on her flank. I had my money on 'space shuttle' personally. This is why I don't gamble.
There may have been a little bit of a conspiracy with the Diamond household's staff to get Lily's mark to bloom while Diamond Rose was on vacation (in Baytona Beach - go check out her chapter to see this newly added scene!). Lily's older than Diamond Rose, but Diamond got her cutie mark first.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/17025
Seen here with Star Swirl (the not-so-bearded) and Daisy Dreams, Lily's complaining no one's drawing her.
*takes filters off Derpibooru and searches Lily Blossom again*
Do we have porn?
Yes. Yes we do.
Silly pony. Who didn't see that coming?
Tori's Secret is one of the easiest ponifications I've ever come up with. Tori is a breed of horse: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tori_horse
As for what the secret it is: the less fabric used, the higher the price.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/542188
But at least she has a desktop pony. The only other one of our sixteen that has one is Dewdrop Dazzle (though there's one for Bumblesweet which sort of counts for Honeybuzz). At least they're the only ones uploaded to Derpibooru.
In all honesty, I think there may be more fanart of Lily than any of the rest of our cast. Including Diamond Rose, a pony who's had more merchandise, and even a turn in the official comics.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/964
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/409003
Star Dreams is another toy-only character from the brushable line. She came bundled with Applejack, and their packaging insinuated that the two enjoyed having sleepovers with one another. There's nothing wrong with an adult mare having a sleepover with a filly the same age as her younger sister, right? I'm sure there's a perfectly rational explanation for this. Like maybe that Hasbro should've packaged Star Dreams with the Cutie Mark Crusaders instead of Applejack. Except they did that, too. Star Dreams was also available in a set with Cheerilee, all three Crusaders, Silver Spoon, and Twist. So yeah, Applejack's on a list, and Cheerilee won't let her within 300 feet of the Ponyville Schoolhouse.
Razzleberry Delight is a character I developed for another fic (she's from the same as yet unpublished fic that features Swiftspeed and Sunny Meadows). Considering the glacial pace I'm progressing with that story, this may be the only time any of them ever make an appearance in a published story.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/2090384
Lily Blossom, along with Feathermay and a trio of mares we haven't seen much of to date (and Cupcake, who won't be appearing in this story). Sweetie Swirl is the only character who has yet to show up at all. One of two characters absent from both Business Trip & Mr. Jones Goes To Equestria (the other was Cherry Pie who started things off in 16), we won't be seeing her at all until until her chapter, which is conveniently the sixteenth and final chapter of Act I.
Source: https://derpibooru.org/images/165192
Both Lily and Diamond spoil themselves on their birthdays in this chapter. I admit, I do the same. I always take the day off, and then buy things I want. It's very self-indulgent, but there's a reason for that. My birthday falls within two weeks of Christmas. As a kid, I only ever had one birthday party (tenth), and even that was a small affair. Last year I threw myself a birthday party, and it was only the second one I've ever had. My friends made time for me, and I was grateful for that.
Source: From the collection of AlwaysDressesInStyle
Next up is Lulu Luck. Rumor has it her chapter's got action, adventure, airships, and cats.
Oh. Hm. Kind of mixed feelings on finding out substantial bits have apparently been added to previous chapters, but thanks for saying that a reread isn't necessary. Still a bit uncomfortable, but... [shrugs]. Your story, and I'm enjoying it far too much to drop it over this. :)
(...It probably won't seem nearly as bad to me later as it did there, but I'm tired (headed to bed soon, hopefully) and have been working through a queue of FIMFiction stuff the past few days that still isn't empty, and don't generally deal well with sudden changes of plan in general, so finding out that suddenly some things I thought I'd had read I hadn't, but that they were still marked as read and should I have a problem with that, and I probably would in fact enjoy them but time... And I'm not actually sure how coherent the above is, see above about wanting to head to bed soon and maybe I should stop now. :D
But, upshot, should be fine, but thank you again for explicitly saying that rereading was not, in your view, necessary. :))
(And of course, I might go back and reread at some point, but there's a difference between having the option and needed to put it in the queue too.)
Ah, congratulations on breaking your writing record! :)
and re the FIMFiction rankings: Wow.
And congratulations. :)
As for your questions... Hm. Sorry, there; I'm not sure I could pick even if I wasn't wanting to head to bed. There's enough variety there that it's hard to just rank them, and none of them happen to, at least that I'm recalling right now, stick out to me as particularly better or worse than the others, in the sense of this question. ...I think. See, tiredness.
"There's only one My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic character I see as 'wanting to watch the world burn' (and it isn't Cozy Glow)"
Hm. Well now I'm wondering who it is, of course. :)
And thank you for writing both the story and these blog posts. :)
5287906
I know that feeling all too well: 'read the newest chapter or go to bed.' Bed has yet to win.
I assure you the additions are completely optional. There's no retconning, and nothing substantial that won't be seen in later chapters from another viewpoint. Nothing in the additional scenes is crucial to the plot, I just added some scenes to help flesh out their characters. I felt like I shortchanged them, especially Cherry Pie and Daisy Dreams. I admit, I'm not used to writing anything ongoing. Originally, Act I was supposed to be a series of quick flashbacks to explain how each pony made it to Earth. By the time Feathermay and Flitterheart rolled around, I had slowed the pace down as the story continued to introduce/showcase the characters, so this was simply a way for me to give the ponies showcased earlier equal treatment to those who've come since.
I look at it as more along the lines of a bonus for those who reread the story as a refresher at a later date, or reread it again after it's completed. For Cherry Pie, we get to see more of her days working at her bakery while it was still in business, Daisy plays O & O with her friends, Diamond goes on vacation (twice), and Dewdrop gets a solo scene to give her some characterization apart from Snowcatcher, and a second scene where Snowcatcher's present (along with most of the others) at the consulate. That last one is the only scene I'd say really adds anything to the overall plot, but we'll see it again from Ploomette's perspective two chapters from now. And while it doesn't add to the plot, Diamond's new scenes have some cameos from established characters (including one of the Mane 6).
The only alteration to what was previously written was a couple of sentences in Cherry Pie's chapter about 'not realizing how many bakeries there were in Canterlot' since one of the new scenes involves taste-testing all of the competition prior to opening her own bakery. And I may have fixed a few typos along the way too.
5288135
Yeah, I'm very consistent in getting to bed on time, in that I pretty consistently don't, and fairly often reading seems to be a day's particular cause. :D
Thanks. :)
And yeah, that makes sense, and I'm glad you have been able to do that fleshing out.
Or those who haven't started yet and do in the future! :D
And they do sound like nice scenes, from your descriptions. :)
Ah, thanks!
Heh, no problem. I know from long experience that they are sneaky things... :)
And, yeah, do now if anything want to read them more, but... I think there's quite possibly not been a time in my life, at least since not too long after I really learned to read, when I haven't had a physical and later also virtual stack of stories I'm in the process of reading or want to start. :)
Favorite so far: Diamond Rose. I used to be a terrible person and I'm trying to do better, too. Also, she's clueless and it's hilarious.
Best cutie mark story: Dewdrop's is the cutest, Rose's is the funniest, and Honeybuzz has the coolest talent.
Best reason for leaving: Flitterheart. I don't have a sister, but I had a best friend that felt like one. She stopped talking to me a few years ago (because I was a terrible person), and it felt like a part of me died, and I can easily imagine wanting to escape to another dimension. On a happier note, we've recently started talking again, so yay!
5293400
First of all, congrats on rekindling your friendship! Secondly, thank you for answering my questions!
Flitterheart's chapter is probably the saddest thing I've ever written, and it breaks my heart to hear you've gone through something similar. It sounds like you're on your way to a happy ending in that regard and I hope things work out for the best. Good luck!
Dewdrop's cutie mark story really is adorable, and it's probably going to be impossible to top. Rose's was definitely the funniest (and I absolutely love writing her obliviousness). I hadn't even given thought to ranking their special talents, and for me it's a toss-up between Honeybuzz's bee-stopping buzz and Feathermay's connection with birds. Hmn, now the question comes up: do I go for the low-hanging fruit and make a joke involving 'the birds and the bees' in a later chapter?
What can I say... I have a thing for terrible puns and word plays.
5294165
Thank you!
Do it!