• Member Since 27th May, 2013
  • offline last seen Tuesday

Scaramouche


https://discord.gg/HDp8sqW - I apologize if I haven't been the friend that you deserve. But I want you to know, in my way, I love you all. - Dr. Sheldon Cooper

More Blog Posts98

  • 38 weeks
    Back in the Saddle

    Hey chaps and chapettes,

    Read More

    2 comments · 268 views
  • 146 weeks
    ... Before I Carry On....

    Hello, Chaps And Chapettes.

    How are you all doing? I hope you're staying safe. We might be on a turning point, but everything balances on a knife-edge, so only take risks if no other choice is apparent. That being said, it has been a hellish year and you all deserve something good to come out of the 2nd half of this year.

    Read More

    6 comments · 452 views
  • 174 weeks
    Chapter 8 Is LIVE!

    Hey Chaps and Chapettes,

    That title is not lying. I want to read it one more time and post it tonight, AND THAT'S WHAT I DID.

    Read More

    5 comments · 502 views
  • 176 weeks
    Therapy Over, But The Healing Never Ends...

    Hi, chaps and chapettes,

    Hope you are all doing well and staying safe in these crazy times. It has not been a fun year, and next year may be equally as uncertain, but look at the end of this one as an opportunity to close the book and start another. I plan on trying to make the best of these last two months and feel as though I did something productive with 2020 as much as possible.

    Read More

    0 comments · 380 views
  • 180 weeks
    You Are Not Alone.

    Hi All,

    Apologies that it has been a while since my last response.

    Read More

    1 comments · 390 views
Jun
15th
2020

All Good Things… Say No To Bullies... · 11:03pm Jun 15th, 2020

#Blog #Bloggerstribe #AllGoodThings… #Blacklivesmatter
15th June 2020

Hello, Chaps and Chapettes,

I had my break on Sunday as I promised I would and goodness, I needed it. As much as I enjoy writing these and getting into a steady flow of writing something almost every day, I do burn myself out now and again. It is good to have a scheduled break to stop and take stock that I have done enough to be proud of the achievement so far.

That said, today wasn’t a great day. Somebody set out to attack me on one of the places online where I enjoy meeting and conversing with friends. I am not going to give them air time, this blog is not about them. It’s not really about me either, I want it to be for you so that you do not fall into the same pitfalls and traps laid out by unkind people the way I seem to.

Bullies.

They come in all shapes and sizes. Sometimes you get a feeling from how they treat you or others straight away, sometimes it is a slow burn. Yet, we as a culture seem to link them to at least one place commonly which is schools. There is an assumption that bullying only occurs in those big grey houses of (a semblance of) learning and that when we leave there we are all big enough and dumb enough to never be bullied again. I’m afraid that is not the case and the world is waking up to that very, very slowly.

My experience at secondary school was horrible at times. There were some occasions when I enjoyed it but for the most part, I was pushed about, beaten up, called names like "lanky" and "Snowman" for being pale, blonde with a white puffer jacket (by kids of all races, before you make assumptions), and found it very hard to make and keep friends. One time I got my hand hurt to the point it no longer straightens properly. Another time I got pushed in front of a moving car and had my fear of nearly being run over laughed at. A particularly sweet child suggested something evil would happen to my mother.

I was happy to get out of that place but I also told myself I probably deserved it, because in primary school I’d been a nasty piece of work. At the start of that school, I befriended a kid called Anthony. By the time I finished and moved up to secondary, I had teased and belittled him for his mental capabilities, how he dressed, his cleanliness, and his attempts to continue to befriend me despite how much of an ass I was to him. I wasn’t alone in this but as an adult, I hold accountability for being a bully to someone who hadn’t deserved it. I don’t know where they are or what they do now, but I am sorry now for how I treated them then.

The problem with bullying, as I said, is that it has stuck to being a word used in playgrounds and told to teachers who seem to regard it as a buzzword rather than a call to action. While that in itself has been a big problem that as of yet still hasn’t been resolved, an equally problematic issue is that bullies grow up. Some grow out of it, the one who damaged my hand apologized, turned out pretty cool, and is still on my Facebook somewhere. Some don’t. Some get worse.

There are more facets than ever to be bullied on and more opportunities to be attacked. It could be on social media for using ill-judgment and sharing a thought or post you thought would be okay. It could be for knowing a person who isn’t popular. It could simply be because people saw you as an easy target. It could even happen if you starred in an innocent movie or sang a song that riled up the hordes of fans who wanted their vision, not yours, or that of a company or a director.

Even if you think you could be safe from social media because you aren’t on it that often or that influential, there are still plenty of places where the bad ones can find you. They could trick you into a friendship or even a relationship. I know a lot of strong people who have got themselves out of nasty situations with not-so-nice and sometimes abusive partners. I know a lot of strong people still in those situations too.

Closer still, it can come from the workplace. Bad apples, as they often like to call them, may not be as vocal about how they treat you, they may not resort to name-calling or rude gestures, but they can put you down in other ways. Refusing you the promotion you deserve, putting you on plans to ‘improve your performance’ when others feel you’re doing the same work like them, pushing you out of roles, making you feel stupid for trying your best and never meeting ‘their’ expectations… The list, I’m afraid, is endless.

Last, but not least, how close to home can you get but family. These people you trust the most and yet I’ve known people who have been treated poorly by their parents, their siblings, distant relatives, or their own children. It’s hurtful to think that the people you could not choose in your life could become cruel and unnecessarily nasty yet it can and does happen.

What is the purpose of this time? It all seems and sounds dark, doesn’t it? My purpose in sharing this is simple; to tell you that you are not alone. You don’t have to fear or be sad or angry at the world but it is okay to be because sometimes the world is the hardest hurdle to overcome. You can get help. Sometimes just reaching out to someone who does care can make the biggest change and if you’re even afraid of that, it’s okay.

If you are at rock-bottom, there are numbers to call and I’ll share a link to all of the international ones below. Additionally, my friend Dave Vickers has a wonderful little saying for rock bottom; it’s the best place to be because the only way to go now is up. My advice is to seek help from those you trust, get yourself as far from the bullies as you can, and never forget this. If you cannot see kindness in the place you are in, put your own kindness into it for those that deserve it so that somehow, more goodness can grow.

Stay safe, stay happy.

All good things,
Love, Scaramouche.
X
#Blacklivesmatter

https://checkpointorg.com/global/

Also, I’ve built a new Discord server that you are welcome to join, for people who need friends and are accommodating to whom they might rub shoulders with.
The Good Things Gathering Discord Server (Furries, Bronies and Kind-Hearts welcome) https://discord.gg/G6cykw

Comments ( 0 )
Login or register to comment