• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

PresentPerfect


Fanfiction masochist. :B She/they https://ko-fi.com/presentperfect

More Blog Posts2550

  • Saturday
    Twilight the 没用

    Yesterday, a fellow named SoothingBell asked if they could translate Twilight the Useless to Chinese, and no way was I gonna say no. :D

    And they turned it around in 24 hours, amazing!

    https://fimtale.com/t/64723

    4 comments · 129 views
  • 1 week
    Idle musing

    so-called because that's what led me to the realization

    What is so compelling about the idea of "warrior woman runs afoul of a wizard and is flung centuries into the future" that I made it happen twice?

    ...And with slightly more musing, I also realize, in a roundabout way, it was with the same wizard. >_> Huh.

    Read More

    7 comments · 163 views
  • 1 week
    Fic recs, March 20th!

    Posting a day earlier than usual because the next reading is a long one!

    H: 1 R: 2 C: 1 V: 1 N: 3

    Read More

    6 comments · 188 views
  • 2 weeks
    Fic recs, March 14th!

    Lotus Moon has done a reading of Fleety's What's Philomena's Name?!

    Hey, help out Regidar, he's looking for experimental fics! Self-promotion allowed!

    Read More

    5 comments · 234 views
  • 2 weeks
    Fic recs, March 8th: Top Ten of 2023!

    Whaaaaat, two review blogs in a row?

    Well hell yes, because I have done much better with the top ten this year and I am inordinately pleased with myself! :3 here's the explanation of the setup, for all that it has never adequately explained what's going on to like, literally anyone:

    Read More

    19 comments · 271 views
Jun
6th
2020

Fic recs, June 5th: Super Trampoline Paid for This edition! · 12:26am Jun 6th, 2020

Good news! NorrisThePony is back! :D At least for now?

This month's Flash Fiction Online includes a bizarre tale about an auntie living under the sink.

I've got a new Mario Maker 2 level, if you play it: 3QC-3KS-CDF

So about a week ago, Super Trampoline was like, here, have some money, review my fucking stories plzkthx.

So I done did that.

The following is three stories he requested, a bunch I picked off the top of his stories sorted by rating, and a few picked off the bottom of the same. There's quite a variety in here, believe it or not!

H: 1 R: 3 C: 5 V: 1 N: 1

Antipodiatrists
Genre: Super Trampoline
Trampoline specifically asked for the first three stories on this list, but there was no way I was gonna pass this one up. A parody of Antipodes based not on the story but on my (and others') review of it? XD So it's probably worth starting out by saying that his writing style seems to have permanently become "rambling blog post", so this is more a summary shot through with random asides than a real parody story. That said, I still laughed more than once. It's (hopefully) the only story on the site that references Charles Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden. The crossed-out text, continuously misappropriated names and inline pictures were all pretty funny, and it all leads up to a piece of fanart that simultaneously makes everything even more hilarious and considerably more worse. Buckle in, we are going for a ride.
Recommended If You Like Random Shit

Are We Not All Trash Doves, Eating from the Garbage Can of Life?
Genre: Random Comedy
Ponyville undergoes an infestation.
As random comedies by Super Trampoline go, this one is quite respectable! Little in the way of asides, and at least one image I found fitting and hilarious. It all culminates in an existential diatribe from Pinkie Pie that was really quite a thing to behold. Quite a trip, and not so far removed from what you might expect on this site that it will turn many away.
Recommended

Lily Valley Turns Into a Truck
Genre: Random PoE Comedy
She just really wanted some Chineighse food.
Trampo, if you're reading this (and I know you are, sicko), this is how you need to write more often. The first chapter of this story is a really weird tale of Lily Valley having a bunch of secrets like eating meat, just some random weird stuff of the sort you'd expect Super Trampoline to write. But it's also shot through with inline footnotes that are the kind of ranting tangents you also expect Super Trampoline to write. The separation of the two actually makes both work considerably better than when the tangents are part of the main body of the story, though navigating through those blocks of text and the way Fimfiction handles them was daunting. I dunno, it felt like a dangerous challenge in some ways. Anyway, this was weird and frequently funny, but what did you expect?
Recommended If You Like Weird Stuff

Trixie Complains About Random Shit
Genre: Random
Trixie goes to talk to a therapist.
Well, those were some words I just read. If nothing else, I can say this story is aptly titled. The bits about Luna and why she was acting as psychiatrist were considerably funnier than Trixie's racist diatribes, though those were at least amusing because literally why? Still, not sure how this could have been expanded into a series of four stories.
Vaguely Recommended

Behind Blue Eyes
Genre: Historical/Sad
Where Lily Valley's inline footnotes were something of a literary minefield in need of navigation, this story uses the site's footnote function in a really awesome way. This is the story of Luna's fall, presented as all dialogue, one letter, and side bars of Luna's inner turmoil. As a Nightmare Moon story, this doesn't break any new ground, and I could make quibbles about some of the word choices vis-a-vis character voice, but the way this is presented is just really unique, and furthermore, well considered.
Recommended

Derpy Writes Erotic Poetry; Twilight Gets to Deal With It
Reading by Dr. Renegade
Mature: Sex
Genre: Sexual Comedy
So this isn't like anything I've ever read before. The first chapter involves Twilight reading the aforementioned poem. (Points for using pony memes as part of the rhyme.) The second chapter then is about her giving Derpy pointers on how to make it better. The crazy thing is, any regular author would just have written the amateurish, forced-rhyme poem and left it at that. The in-universe editing is entirely original and drives home the idea that this was written by a character. Which is good, because between the randomness and bad meter, it's a little hard to read for a poetry snob. The funniest bits were the shipping jokes, though, those are always a good time. So yeah, this is definitely not like anything you've read either, I'd wager!
Recommended If You Enjoy Comedic Sex

Hello Ponies!
Genre: Like a Feghoot, but If It Didn't End in a Pun, Just a Really Dumb Punchline
Zalgo comes to Equestria.
Boy, this was sure a thing. XD The gravitas here is perfect, building up to one of the stupidest punchlines I've ever seen, but it was great. This is up there with Nothing Gold Can Stay in terms of rug-pulls, save that Super Trampoline wrote it, so you kind of expected something like it to happen.
Recommended

These Are the Days of Our Lives
Genre: Journal Changeling Fic
A changeling struggles with having free will.
Damn. This is one of Trampoline's best fics, gonna say that right off the bat. A strong character voice, plus dealing with changelings living out from under Chrysalis's shadow long before the clown meese were a thing. But just the central conceit, of having free will and realizing all the troubles that come along with it, of trying to reconcile holding one's destiny in one's own hands with not wanting to return to easier but darker times, that's pretty powerful. Not to mention eminently relatable. So if you read one story out of this blog, make it this one.
Highly Recommended

Mocha and Tramp Write a Shitfic by Super Trampoline and Mocha Star
Genre: What
There will be BEES.
Every now and then, Super Trampoline will go up to someone and be like "Let's write a shitfic together!" This, I assume, can be taken as an example of what happens when someone says "sure". There's funny parts in here, but mostly it is just balls-to-the-wall, no-holds-barred, complete and total chaos. I wish the formatted part in the middle worked, because it looks borked. I won't say I had a bad time, but this is definitely not for everyone.
Recommended Only If You Can Handle the Randle… I Mean Random

Uh oh, Super Trampoline should remember to keep the titles short.
Genre: Super Trampoline
Fluttershy's vape, something something, Marine le Pen, something, springs.
We have reached peak randomness. This is just a disconnected series of ideas that don't gel into anything whatsoever. It's completely removed from anything, including itself. I guess reading stories at the bottom of Trampoline's ratings wasn't a great idea but hey there's one more.
Not Recommended

How Queer It Is 2 Think That This Shall B My Final Shitfic, 4 N but a Few Short Hours the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Series Finale Will Air and at Last This Wretched Curse I Have Born for Seven Long Years Will Be Lifted & I Shall Be Free!
Genre: Self-Insert Monologue
Super Trampoline tells all the ponies what he thinks of them.
I'm reading this one for the cover art and because you can't have a Super Trampoline-focused review blog without at least one story with a paragraph for a title that will make me have to set the vertical centering tabs on my spreadsheet. So yeah, this is another one that's more of a blog post than a story, but gets away with it via an establishing shot showing Super Trampoline talking to Twilight Sparkle. The rest is, well, pretty heartfelt and even has a few good notes on the main characters' good points. Really can't fault it for that. For not being much of a story, maybe, but not for not being real.
Recommended If You're Still a Little Misty-Eyed That the Show's Over

Report PresentPerfect · 353 views · #fic reviews
Comments ( 15 )

Recommended If You Enjoy Comedic Sex

That's going in the read-it-later list.

It seems Norris has a fanboy.

What I'm most proud of about

is that as the story says, it is indeed the only story I ever wrote entirely while at work, in one shift on my phone no less!

Also I'm glad you enjoyed these! Well worth the $15 it cost me to stroke my ego!

This is up there with Nothing Gold Can Stay in terms of rug-pulls, save that Super Trampoline wrote it

ENothing Gold Can Stay
After Rarity's death, Doctor Whooves Takes Discord, Celestia, and Fleur Dis Lee several billion years into the future, to watch the long-princessless sun engulf the planet Earth. Somehow, that makes things better.
Super Trampoline · 3.1k words  ·  32  7 · 1.3k views

Bwuh? I'm so confused!

It might not have gotten that coveted HR, but in my opinion Trash Doves is the best and most important story I've ever written.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5278639

TNothing Gold Can Stay
Twilight must leave
TheOnly · 1.4k words  ·  101  19 · 2.2k views

First time I didn't add any story to my RiL from your rec.

5278807
Your loss.
(No really, go read Trash Doves)

5279247
Nah sorry didn't get my interest.

5279694
Please tell me more about the cat in your profile pic.

5408543
Lol, you wrote to me almost half a year after this comment. As for this fluffy guy on my profile, his name was Kesha and I really like him even if he wasn't exactly a cuddly type, last time I seen him was at winter of 2009 when this pic was made, later next year my grandparents told me that he ran away into the forest near their village and I haven't heard anything about him since then, even if he survived he would have died from old age already. After I started using more social media and stuff like it I decided to make him my profile pic and I'm seriously use it everywhere.

5408575
I hope he lived a good life. He’s fucking majestic.

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