Interview with ROBCakeran53 · 7:01pm Jun 1st, 2020
Snow Heart was a blue bat alicorn with white mane and tail, the cutie mark of a snowflake with a heart in it on her flank. She sipped at her coffee.
“I wonder what it’s like to be famous. For ponies to see how hard I work to bring these silly stories to life. If only there was someone that understood this. Someone amazing that could enlighten me. So that I might not be just a small candle amidst the glow of many lanterns. But...a pony like that wouldn’t talk to a girl like me.” she muttered to herself.
“Hey Snow.” began Sky.
“Yes?” she asked her guard.
“There’s some guy out here requesting to see you.”
“Alright, tell him to come in. Hmm...this might be a good distraction.”
It was apparent this pony wasn’t sure of his four hooves as he cautiously walked in. Coat of orange, white, scraggly hair, brown eyes and the cutie mark of… a running cake? Strange. He also wore a worn and weathered red and black pladded hat.
“I don’t understand how you guys get used to this,” he said, looking at his hoof. “I know I was asked for an interview, but I didn’t expect to be morphed and disfigured into an orange abomination.”
Snow Heart tilted her head as the pony walked in. She blinked as she listened to him speak.
“Um…” she paused. What was so bad about being a pony? To her it felt like an improvement. “Hello there, welcome. My name is Snow Heart, and might I know who you are? It seems you wanted to speak with me?” she asked as she sipped at her coffee. Well at least this time she wasn’t in some weird dimension talking to a triangle.
“Yeah, my name is… oh wait, I’m a horse now. I guess you can call me Cakeran, or as most do, Rob. I got a letter in the mail about seeing… well, you I guess? Didn’t think I’d get shoved into a weird mirror and come to like this. At least they let me keep my hat.” He poked at the clothing.
He continued. “Said something about doing an interview? And well, here I am?”
“Ah, it’s a pleasure to meet you Rob. I admit I never expected you to respond to my letter. Famous ponies don’t talk to us little creatures much. So first of all, thank you kindly for indulging my questions. And hopefully you don’t mind my wings.” she spoke as she unfurled her bat wings, letting him see fully she wasn’t a typical alicorn. She was a baticorn. Made her unique, and quite special in her own way. Though she was often ashamed of showing off her wings. It made ponies ask her questions, and she preferred to remain mysterious.
“So do tell me, what got you into MLP in the first place? And also what is it about mlp that makes you enjoy writing stories about pastel colored ponies?” she asked him, as she began jotting down notes. “Would you like some coffee? Oh whoops, that was three questions.” she blushed slightly, gesturing for him to speak now.
Ignoring any formality, he took a seat in the chair opposite of her. “Yeah, coffee sounds great, I’ll take a cup.” He watched her retrieve another cup, pouring in the hot liquid from the pot, and magic it to him. He gingerly took it in his hooves. “Thanks. Weird how I can just like, hold this thing with a hoof.” To demonstrate, he held the cup with a single hoof, defying any known laws of physics. But he was a cartoon horse now, so physics be damned.
He then removed his hat, and resting upon his head was a stainless flask, to which he added some amber liquid to his coffee. Replacing the flask atop his head, and then his hat, he took a drink.
“Also, about what you said, I don’t consider myself famous. My stories… or well really, one story might be, but I’m not. I’m just another person, I wipe my ass like anybody else.
“But I guess if we’re gonna jump right into it, what got me into MLP? Well, I was never really a person for 4chan or the like, but a friend of mine started pestering me online about watching it. I honestly didn’t really care, but he linked me three episodes. Griffon the Brush Off, which instantly hooked me, but I needed to see more before committing. Party of One was next, and while it was funny in a weird way, I didn’t care for it. But then, he linked me the final episode of the season, as it had just aired that morning, The Best Night Ever. That was the final straw, and I had to know, and see, more. So I did, I binged the rest of the show, in order this time, and I honestly never looked back.
“And I guess, as someone who was fresh into writing fan fictions at the time, it was only natural for me to start doing MLP fictions. I was originally part of a small, niche group who wrote things for VG Cats, an online comic. Then once MLP happened, I started writing for that.
“Oh is that so?” she asked when he mentioned to her he wasn’t famous. She had to pause to not spit out the coffee she had just sipped into her lips. She listened to him, as she jotted down notes, while observing him. “It’s kind of ironic, ponies tell me I’m famous too, but really I’ve done nothing noteworthy to talk about, at least not as far as mlp goes.” she stated, with a slight sigh. Focusing her attention on him, she recalled the story that made him famous. She had to admit, she hadn’t read it, but she knew so much about it from others that have read it.
“It was like striking lightning in a bottle huh? You found that one story that made everyone go “SCREE” and just like that, your name was known all across the lands. I admit, I was hesitant to send the letter, after all I’m just a pony, why would you want to spend your time talking to me?” she spoke, as her ears drooped slightly before slapping herself. “Sorry about that, my writer has confidence issues. She’s working on it. Anyways…” she paused, as she put her empty cup down to the table.
“Judging by the episodes you mentioned, would that imply that you think Pinkie Pie is best pony?” she asked curiously. “I am a fan of Rainbow Dash myself. She’s so...awesome.” she let out a scree. “Scree” She coughed into her forehoof, blushing like a school filly. “Sorry about that, so I guess I’ll ask now, who is best pony?”
He shrugged. “Confidence is only a thing of the mind. I just quit caring and do as I do. But yeah, to the question. Pinkie is actually one of my lesser favorite ponies, it just happened to be those two episodes especially focused on her.
“And, best pony question already? You go right for the throat. I see it as a loaded question, honestly, because I like to think I have a favorite pony, but then there is also a separate ‘best pony’ that represents the show. So I’ll give you both! Best pony, to me, is always Derpy. She’s the idol of our fandom, we literally brought her to life in the show! She’s a part of us, and therefor she’s the best. Also, I’m a huge sucker for Derpy and Dinky stuff, because man, mama Derp and The Dink are cute as Hell.
“And, of course, favorite pony is Applejack, even though people think it’s Big Mac by some of my merch. I really enjoy his character, can even resonate with it to a point, but Appul is it.”
“Applejack is a good pony. She doesn’t get enough love in my honest opinion. My personality is like 90% Flutttershy, and about 10% Applejack. I tend to be honest and blunt with my responses, and I believe it shows. But if you didn’t figure it out, best pony to me is Rainbow Dash, for without her, I wouldn’t be here, and that’s all the reason I need to justify her being the best, and she’s awesome. But anyways! I really should stop talking about Rainbow Dash so much. We’re here to talk about you. Though you did write a rather famous story with Dashie in it. Would you like to talk about it, or are you sick of it by now? We can always skip it, or maybe there’s some new project you’d like to tell us about?” she asked him, as he spoke of his love of Derpy, she immediately thought of her one story, but kept hush hush about it, she was here to talk about him, not ramble on for hours about her own stuff that no pony really wanted to hear about.
He chuckled. “It used to get old, back when MLD was popular and everyone was flipping out over it. I did a lot of interviews, talked with people about it. I’d say it sometimes gets repetitive, but I don’t mind talking about it. I mean, without it, I wouldn’t even be here, now would I?”
“Honestly, I knew of you from the Barcast interview, not specifically My Little Dashie, but this is just you know you’re chance to talk about your stories, even if it’s not the one you’re famous for. Either way, I’m interested in hearing anything you have to say. So I’ll leave it up to you in the end. What do you wanna say about your stories?”
Looking around the room, the stallion was lost in thought. Eyes darting left and right, and taking another sip of his spiked coffee. Finally, after a few moments, he sighed. “I try to write what feels real, most of the time.
“My Little Dashie was one of those things that was left ambiguous for readers to immerse themselves, like, so they could feel like they were the person in the story. And the ending, well, that’s just how it goes sometimes. Sometimes, you need to let things go, whether you want to or not.
“MLD wasn’t even my first MLP fan fiction, it was another story called Divergent Days, which has been pretty much abandoned due to a lot of things, but mostly… I changed as a writer over the years. A current, on going story of mine, The Whittler, has been the predecessor to DD, and I think it shows.
“I can’t say I’m exactly a better writer now, but I have improved from those days. I went through a silly phase where I wrote a lot of none sense stories, comedies, stuff like that. Now, believe it or not, I’ve been dabbling more into the mature side of things, exploring the body, the mind even.
“Thanks to a good friend of mine, another author by the handle Admiral Biscuit, I’ve found real enjoyment in writing more slice of life stories. I always thought people wanted grand adventures, exciting things always happening, but then as I wrote The Whittler, I found out I was forgoing those original thoughts, and it took someone online to tell me in a comment that it felt more slice of life than anything.
“So that was it. I realized, I enjoy these kinds of stories. I don’t go crazy into research for accuracy, but I like to picture Equestria in a… I guess a sort of hybrid era from the 1920’s to 1960’s. Dabble in different parts of those times, and build up an interesting world.
One such story, that I spent months on, was YCH, which stands for an artist term ‘Your Character Here’. I wanted to write something different, and I had the idea to make a story about ‘What if the ponies in YCH art were, in fact, real?’ So that’s what I did. It’s a story about a married couple who pose for still art in lewd and provocative ways, so the artists can allow people to bid on them, and then paint over their original figures in the art piece.
“And then I have stories like An Even Worse Self Insertion. It’s exactly what the title says. It’s a… vent fic, for me, when I’m going through problems. I tend to bounce my issues off of myself, but usually inserting another character from something of memory. When I was little, it was Capser the friendly ghost. As I grew up, I’d just use whatever. And now, well, I use MLP characters.
“I’ve come a long way with my writing since MLD. But, well, I’ve always got room to learn and grow. I just try to do things that, when someone reads them, they can understand. I don’t like fancy sentence structure, or big words. I rarely use my thesaurus but I use the crap out of my dictionary.”
“I tend to have my thesaurus on hoof at all times. Helps me find the right words.” Snow Heart said, as she listened to him. “Casper...good movie. I sympathized with that ghost. He needs more love.” she then jotted down more notes, mhmphhmming to herself. “Mature stories. Ahem. I’ve been dabbling in that myself, but I haven’t shown any of it to Fimfiction, because I don’t want others to think I’m well...slutty? Can I say that? I don’t know. But anyways, I must admit something. I’ve never seen Diehard and I think it’s why I never really saw a reason to read MLD, I mean no offense of course! I’m sure it’s great, just not my cup of tea I guess?”
“But we should get this interview over so you can like go back to being a human again. I’m sure you are rather uncomfortable over there. Though I must say, your Oc is quite the cutie.” Snow Heart smiled, leaning over and softly petting his mane. “Good Rob, Good Rob.” she teased slightly before sitting back in her seat again.
“Do tell me, what advice would you give to a new writer? One that is just getting their feet wet. What would you tell them?”
He laughed, messing with his mane where she pet him. “Well, going back a little bit, for one thing not feeling ashamed about what you write. You wanna write smut? Go for it! When I first started I was worried, so I made an alternative account for it. I realized later how silly it was. Now, I just leave it as it is for simplicity’s sake, rebranding it as my clop only story profile.
“Some people don’t like to see that stuff, but then again, that’s also why there is a mature filter on Fimmy Fic. So, that’s one tip. Another thing to remember, as a new writer, don’t be afraid. You’re gonna fuck up some stuff, make mistakes, but the key is learning from it, and listening to when people actually try to help.
“There are a lot of good, helpful people on the site, so remember to listen when someone is giving you suggestions. You don’t always have to take their advice, but hey, you are hopefully learning from it.
“And the last bit of major advice I can think of, especially starting out, is write what you know. Sometimes people try to make a large, grand thing, but know nothing about what they’re really saying or having characters do. Do a little homework, research things, especially if you know you don’t know anything about it.
“But writing what you do know helps remove some of that. It’s good to eventually break out of your comfort zone and try other stories, but when you write about something you’re overly familiar with, be it a topic, situation, or whatever, then the words flow more freely and you’re relying less on imagination, and more on actual facts.”
“Mhmmph. I see that is very wise wisdom. I will try to take this into note. And for any new writers out there. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. That’s important too. Sometimes it’s scary, but in order to grow and learn, we must first fall down and stumble so that we can walk. Just a few more questions and then I promise you’ll be free to go.” Snow Heart chuckled.
“So Rob...and I mean the writer not the pony. Is there anything you’d like to say about yourself? Let your fans know a bit more about the man behind the pony?”
Rubbing behind his head, he finished off his coffee. “I dunno. I’m mechanical by nature, been fixing bicycles since I was 8. Been doing other stuff, had my first car when I was 11, but it never ran. I work a lot, both at home and at work, which I’m employed at a FBO, that’s Fixed Base Operator, at a non-commercial airport. Vehicles always need fixing, airplanes need scheduled maintenance, and I also fuel and move them with tugs. That sort of thing.
“I like old stuff, most of the things I own are pre-1980’s, and my music selection also reflects that. Most of it is big band and swing, on actual records. I do play video games, but not a lot anymore. Uh…” he tapped his chin. “I enjoy going out and doing stuff, usually hang out at the local bar with other Fimmy Fic authors. There’s five of us who are regulars, with a few others sprinkled in here and there. We hang out at my house, in my pole barn, where I do a majority of my tinkering and work.
“That’s all I can really think of at the top of my head, not without going into crazy detail of things anyway. I’m horrible at descriptions, both of myself and my stories, ha ha.”
“Awwh, and here I’d thought you’d recall us with the detailed story of Rob the writer. I get that though. Though I also like older things. One of my personal favorite things to do outside the fandom is go thrifting at my local antique mall. You never know what amazing things you might discover. It’s like this giant garage sale that’s open all year round. I myself don’t drink alcohol, but I can understand how it can bring ponies together. Now while I have the chance, I’m going flip the table a bit here.
“Is there anything you’d like to ask me? I’m just a lonely bat mare, but why not give some pony famous the chance to ask me a question. Go on, don’t be shy.” she chuckled. “Though seriously the only question I have left to ask, is this.
“Is there anything else you’d like to say?”
He smiled. “Well, not sure the kinds of questions you’re never asked, but I imagine you write also? What do you tend to write? What do you like to write?”
“Oh that’s easy to answer. Romance. I like my fluff. It’s something I’ve lacked in my life for the longest time. Being lonely, I write of happy ponies making kissy faces, of a future I hope to have someday. And I also write cute little one shots that seem to bring smiles to others, and in the end, if my stories can lift some pony’s spirits, then in the end, it’s all worth the effort of pounding my fingers against the keyboard for days and days trying to get out a 2k one shot. But...admittedly, I want to find that story. That “My Little Dashie” story that will make ponies look at me and go “wow she’s awesome” I guess that about sums it up really. I don’t think I’m really anything that special, but I can’t deny, I do like being praised, and adore headpats. But scree. Thank you so much for coming here. Sorry to drag you out into a pony again. Rob.” she smiled towards him, getting up and coming over to him, she placed her hoof on his head.
*pet pet*
“Well thanks for having me,” he said, then, hesitantly, raised his hoof up to give the mare a few pets. “This is kinda weird but in a cute way…” he mumbled.
She purred and leaned in as he pet her head. “Puuuurrrr” *she nuzzled her mane against his hoof, having this awestruck look to her pink eyes.
“Thanks for everything, keep being awesome.” and with that, she’d allow him to go back to whatever he was doing before this. She looked up at the sky, and thought about his words of wisdom, taking them to heart. And having made a new friend this day, she smiled.
“I sure do love seeing how ponies can make people come together.”
END.
Fimfiction handle: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/2538/ROBCakeran53
Naice!
Ah yes, the local small-town hero 'Cakeran.'
This is a great fun interview. I'm really proud of the direction Rob's taken as an author in recent times, and I wish him much more success (in both writing and love) in the foreseeable future.
Truly, you are my small-town hero.
Do you ever get the urge to go through a door, calling out, "Freeze! FBO!"
5273429
Im like Ottis Campbell from Andy Griffith. The town drunk, but also the rare hero when the time arises.
5273442
Not until you said it... damn it Georg!