Interview with Ninjadeadbeard · 3:57pm May 30th, 2020
A roleplay-style interview with Ninjadeadbeard
Nailah as Snow Heart
Ninjadeadbeard as Ann
Snow Heart sipped at her coffee, as she glanced out the window. “Hmmm…” she muttered to herself. She tapped her forehoof against the table. She looked towards Skyward Sword, her faithful guard, who seemed rigid and tense.
“What’s wrong Sky?” asked Snow.
“Sometimes not right in the air Snowy. Be cautious.”
“Relax Sky. You are too tense for your own good. It’s not like some pony is going to come in and kidnap me. Shessh.”
“Hm,” Ann noted to herself as she slowly rose out of the nearby coffee pot as yellow and pink steam, “That would be a fun distraction… but Dad says it’s rude to drag ponies through dimensional gateways. Also messy. You should really drink decaf, by the way. This stuff’s gonna stick to my coat.”
Snow Heart spit out the coffee in her mouth, and just blinked.
“What the actual buck? Who are you? What are you? And um...that’s nice I guess?” she asked while staring at this strange creature? Was it even a pony? Snow Heart was so confused, she tensed up, and had to silence her guard from attacking her um friend...yes.
“So why don’t you sit down, have a cup of decaf with me, and we can get to know each other?” she suggested, allowing her to speak.
Ann’s eyes lit up a that… which was odd since she thought she’d taken the batteries out.
“Oooh! That would be lovely! I always like making new friends!”
Ann held out a mug with Fluttershy’s face on it, though upside down. Coffee seemed to flow up from the pot and into her mug until it was quite full. She then turned it right around… only for the mug to now be full of green jelly beans and marshmallows.
With a whip-like crack of her long, pink tail, she then caused one of the chairs to become a rubber duck, which she leisurely sat upon.
“So,” she sipped her ‘drink’, “To answer your first question, my name’s Anarchy. Ann, to my friends, and I’m a Ponequus…”
She sighed, and scrunched up her fluffy white eyebrows, “And yes. I know that just means Pony-Pony. Blame my Dad, the Author, and the Ponish language itself.”
“I see, it is a pleasure to meet you Ann, I am Snow Heart, but you can just call me Snow.” she smiled softly.
“She’s also a Princess.” spoke Skyward Sword with a huff.
“Do you mind Sky? I’m trying to make friends with this nice pony, and you being all over protective isnt’ helping. Go like...do something.”
“Fine! Don’t come crying to me if your flank gets napped when I’m not here.” he huffed.
“Forgive him, I think he didn’t sleep right or something. And pony language is quite complex, which is why my creator never bothered trying to understand it. She named me for my cutie mark.” spoke Snow pointing to her flank. The heart within a snowflake. “Quite a lazy way to name a pony, but I guess it works. So tell me Ann what makes you interested in writing about ponies?”
Ann leaned back in her ‘chair’ and gave the question a ponder.
“Well, speaking as someone else’s mouthpiece…” she frowned, “… and not getting paid extra for it… I guess my interest in horsewords began as a crossroads between my love of writing, and my love and appreciation for a show that, despite maybe a hiccup or two, really tried to espouse good morals and wholesome lessons through the lens of really good characters and character development.”
She sipped at her drink again, and said, “I mean, from the get-go, everything just seemed to have more depth behind it than in other shows and media. Stock characters are allowed to be real people… er, ponies. There’s a lovely high fantasy vibe to everything, even when it’s just fun slice of life business. And fun is ultimately why I stick around.
“Why wouldn’t I want to be a part of something like that? Even as tangentially as through fanfiction?”
“Indeed, if you want paid, would headpats be acceptable payment?” she chuckled, as she thought of her own writer and how she adored simple pets of the head. “But yes, I would agree with that, but also I speak for my author here in that it has helped her with the bad thoughts that linger around us.” she spoke before leaning forward in her chair a bit.
“Now...you’ve said what makes you write, but what is it about others works that you enjoy? What keeps you here with us all?”
Ann’s eyes grew both wide, and sparkly.
“Headpats…”
She shook her head, clearing away the thoughts, and the small amount of drool that had started leaking from her muzzle.
“Um…” she blushed, “No, headpats are alright. But I’d prefer to be paid in sequels.”
Ann’s eyes narrowed into a glare, which she shot off in a strangely-empty direction.
“Yeah, I said it! Gimme a one-shot with the twins! Or one with my friends on Nightmare Night. I tell ya, sitting around my author’s imagination can get old, fast.
“But, right… your question,” Ann quickly collected herself, and sat back in a strangely non-pony manner, crossing her legs and setting her mug off to one side, “I s’ppose I stick around because of the community. Sure, there’s other places to talk with other fans, but my author’s not a fan of Reddit for arbitrary reasons, and /mlp/ is a literal walking trashfire. Plus, at least here, there are authors and creative types who still try and embody the ideals of the show. That the ability to love others can bridge the gap between beings, and lead to their mutual growth through empathy and understanding.”
Ann furrowed her considerable brows again.
“My author’s really pretentious today, isn’t he?”
“Pretentious? That’s a big word, that my author wants me to ask what it means. She tries to be well educated, but I think her blonde is showing.” Snow Heart chuckled. “Sequels eh? Ponies are still trying to get me to write a sequel to “Oh Pony I shrunk my sister.” sometimes it’s hard to believe anyone would want a sequel to such a silly thing. I stick around to make friends like you. It warms my heart to know you’d take the time out of your day to come here and talk to a bat alicorn like me. I do hope my wings don’t bother you. I must admit, flying was something I struggled with at first, but thankfully my younger sister is a pegusus and taught me how to use my wings to control the breeze. Anyways. I’m getting distracted. So...writer, what would you like your fans to know about you? Now’s your chance.”
“Ironically,” Ann chuckled, “Defining pretentious might just make him sound more pretentious. Which he’s really not.”
She took a moment to focus on Snow Heart’s wings. A second Ann, dressed as a tailor, blipped into existence behind the bat alicorn…
“Baticorn…” Ann mused.
… and began measuring her wings.
“Yeah, I know how that is,” Ann took a solid bite out of her mug, and continued talking, “I got bat-wings from my Dad. Took me forever to learn how to use them. Turns out, probably cuz of Chaos, I had to fly backwards in order to fly forwards. Crazy, huh? I mean, I could always just use my Chaos magic to fly, but where’s the fun in that?
“Right, what does my Writer want known about him?” Ann tapped her chin in thought a moment, “Well… he’s actually a very private person. Doesn’t like talking about himself all that much. Would much rather talk about other people. He’s got what someone called a ‘calming aura’. Apparently, people tend to open up around him a lot. Like, weirdly a lot! He once knew a girl in college for a whole fifteen minutes, and she was already asking him if she should marry her boyfriend that was in prison, or the one who wasn’t.”
The tailor-Ann finally popped out of reality, as the main-Ann shook her head, “He’s like a weirdness magnet, I swear. Guess… besides that? He’s a fan of Trixie, Starlight and Sunset. Like, bigtime fan. They’re not his waifus, or anything… Rarity got that down pat… but he likes the characters who’ve failed in some way. I guess he finds them relatable? Or, he likes how they try to rise above their failure.
“I would have no idea about that, honestly…” Ann began nervously sipping on a bagel that hadn’t been there a moment ago, “But, um… yeah, that’s it.”
Snow Heart tensed up when Ann sought to measure her bat wings. “Um...careful there.” she spoke out as she did her best not to laugh. A certain part of her was ticklish at the base of where her wings connected to her back. She then nodded, jotting down the notes as she thought of her own “writer” “Yeah, I get that. My writer just tends to hop in a bush whenever people ask about her. She’s well...shy and very skittish. A lot like your mom actually.” Snow Heart stated as she looked to Ann, asking her a more personal question.
“Do people look at you weird when you mention you like ponies or have you learnt to just say buck it and embrace it even around non-fans?”
“A little of column A, a little of column Bee,” said Ann, holding up the letter in one hoof, and an oversized bumblebee in the other. Said bee promptly ‘meowed’, and took off for parts unknown.
Ann giggled to herself, then returned to the conversation. “One thing you gotta get over, being in this fandom, is enjoying colorful little horsies designed to sell toys to little girls. No sense being bashful about it when we’re all into the same thing.
“Uh,” she grimaced, “But outside of a couple close, real life, friends… Well, not every part of our hobby needs to be shouted from the rooftops.”
She took another sip of her mug, strangely restored and now filled with mustard, while humming, “waiting til the bomb drops” beneath her breath in a sing-song.
“Indeed that is very true. My writer has been rather proud ot being a pegasiter herself, and even started collecting unicorns, though she said she was weird before mlp so it’s meh. But anyways I just have a few more questions and then I promise we can get to the fun part of like doing something together. Let’s see” Snow checked her notes.
“If there was one thing you would say to a new writer just getting their feet wet, what advice would you give?”
“Oh, wow,” Ann pinched the bridge of her muzzle, and sighed, “My writer… kinda went on a tangent about that once. But, to summarize:
“Read ‘If’, by Rudyard Kipling,” she sipped her mustard, and laughed, “I mean it! Sure, he was a weird racist guy, but who wasn’t? He said, ‘If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, / But make allowance for their doubting too’, then you would be ‘a Man’.”
Her nose scrunched up.
“Uh, by which I think I mean… learn to take criticism with grace, but also figure out when not to listen to it. Hearing your mistakes from someone else’s perspective is necessary to improve as a writer, but your own Voice is important to hold onto. Figuring out that balance is hard, but it’s the ultimate test of a writer to recognize the difference between his faults and his strengths.”
“Hmm...I see that is very wise. I see you are quite the intelligent one. Now let’s see here. I think we’re just about done, but before we go watch movies and eat lots of unhealthy snacks is there anything else you’d like to say?”
Ann narrowed her eyes in thought. Her nose scrunched up, and she began working her jaw left, and then right.
Finally, she looked up at her new friend, and said, with the utmost sincerity, “Reality is an illusion, the universe is a hologram. Buy gold. Commit arson. Eat the rich.”
She then gave the other pony a quick nose-boop, to signal their eternal friendship.
Snow Heart was booped. “What no headpats?” she whimpered, giving her best pout face, eyes widening, ears drooping down by her side. “Alright, what movies do you like? I must say I’m a sucker for romance.”
The little Ponequus fretted for a moment… and then, a lightbulb flashed into existence above her head. With a grin, she poofed a dozen white-gloved hands into reality, and they quickly set about giving headpats to any and everycreature with a ten-mile radius.
“I do like romantic-comedies,” she laughed, “Does your popcorn maker do candy corn with mayo? I wouldn’t want to overindulge…”
“Candy corn with mayo? Um...no that’s weird. But romantic comedies are great. I still remember seeing the Proposal in theaters. But yeah sit back relax, and enjoy the show, and hopefully you don’t mind if others join us, I’m sure they are many out there that would like to ask you questions of their own. For me, I just want to be friends. I’m a simple bat mare, nothing that special about me at all, but I have enjoyed your pleasant company, Ann...or should I say Ninja?” she winked at the author, and with that, the two mares would enjoy their time together, and hopefully not be interrupted by some giant creature invading Equestria. Being a Princess was hard work.
END
Link to his fimfiction: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/354710/Ninjadeadbeard
Nice to see you on here, Ninjadeadbeard.
I'm sorry, but I really don't understand this new structure for interviews. Who is asking, who is answering...? Is this even an interview...? I'm very lost.
5273738
It's formatted like a roleplay. I go first, then Ninja, then me, and so on and so forth. I can add Snow Heart and Ann before each speaking line if that would help?
5273750
Yes, add a speaker header. Better yet, color code the names. Maybe something like this:
Maybe add a beginning blurb to make clear that this is an RP, and also to make clear who the interviewer and interviewee are:
It's a very cool concept, I have to say.
5273968
I made some adjustments, hopefully that helps, and I'll be sure to take this into note for future interviews, thank you so kindly for your feedback, and keep being awesome.